mjmw`@ l`bqryt lslmy@
- `bqry@ mHmd Sl~ llh `lyh wslm.- `bqry@ lSdyq rDy llh `nh.- `bqry@ `mr rDy llh `nh.- `bqry@ `thmn bn `fn rDy llh `nh.- `bqry@ lmm `ly rDy llh `nh.- `bqry@ khld rDy llh `nh.nbdh@ mwq` lnyl wlfrt:mn lS`wb@ bmkn... drk md~ l'thr ldhy trkh l`qd llHDr@ l`rby@... fhdh lmfkr l'sTwr@ trk myrthan yst`Sy drkh `l~ kl dhy qdr@ wfkr... `shrt bl my't lktb wldrst wlmqlt wl'sh`r... wmn `yn@ ktbth lsysy@ lty twqft b`d lthwr@ ybrz ktbh "l shyw`y@ wl st`mr" k`lm@ Hqyqy@ fy hdh lmDmr.. wt`d l`bqryt 'shhr m 'khrj l`qd llfkr lslmy whw lm yktb trykhan ll'shkhS 'w lwqy'` fHsb... kl kn ySb lfkr fy qwlb ktbh mHllan ll'Hdth wmwqf lshkhSyt lty ytnwlh `n Tryq m`ljth wmnqshth l'mht lktb ltrykhy@ wmrj`h lkbr~...wbyn ydyn ktb jm` twlyf@ mn ktb l`bqryt wknt lbdy@ m` `bqry@ mHmd Sl~ llh `lyh wslm, Hyth tSd~ l`qd fy hdh lktb lldf` ldhy ytSd~ lldf` `n rswl llh, wldhwd `n shr`th, wlrd `l~ shny'yh mmn jtr'w `l~ mnw'th, wltyn blbrhn tlw lbrhn `l~ thbt `Zmth, w`Zm@ d`wth, wqdsy@ rslth, wsmw `bqryth... lqd tnwl l`qd lkshf `n `bqry@ mHmd Sl~ llh `lyh wslm fy qwlh wf`lh, bl fy skwth wfkrh, f'fd l`qd w'jd, wst`rD f'bd`, wstqS f'shb`, wt'lqt Gyrth `l~ mHmd (Sl~ llh `lyh wslm), fy rd shm mnwy'yh l~ nHwrhm, wqHmhm fy kl bTl mn d`wyhm.'m fy ktbh `bqry@ lSdyq fbd' l`qd ktbh blqwl fy tqdym ktby hdh `n 'by bkr lSdyq 'qwl m qlth fy "`bqry@ mHmd" w"`bqry@ `mr" wkl ktb mn hdh lqbyl.wfHwh 'nny l 'ktb trjm@ llSdyq rDy llh `nh, wl 'ktb trykhan lkhlfth wHwdth `Srh, wl '`ny blwqy'` mn Hyth hy wqy'`, wl bl'khbr mn Hyth hy 'khbr, fhdhh mwDw`t lm 'qSdh wlm 'dhkr fy `nwyn lktb m y`d lqry' bh wywjh stTl`h lyh. wlknm qSdt 'n 'rsm llSdyq Swr@ nfsy@ t`rfn bh, wtjlw ln khly'qh wbw`th '`mlh, km tjlw lSwr@ mlmH mn trh bl`yn. fl t`nyn lwqy'` wl'khbr l bmqdr m tw'dy 'dh fy hdh lmqSd ldhy l mqSd ln Gyrh... wl`l Hdthan SGyran ystHq mn ltqdym `l~ 'kbr lHwdth dh knt fyh dll@ nfsy@ 'kbr mn dllth, wlmH@ mSwr@ 'Zhr mn lmHth. bl l`l lklm@ lmwjz@ lty tjy `rDan fy lmnsbt ttqdm lhdh lsbb `l~ lHwdth kbyrh wSGyrh fy mqys ltrykh".n dhlk lnS l`qdy lwDH lyHml fy Tyth tbynan wDHan `l~ 'n mw'lf hdhh l`bqryt lm yqSd lktb@ ltrykhy@ lm`rwf@ wlmtdwl@, wnm kn hdfh lHqyqy mn wr ktbth ltlk lsyr 'mran akhr hw ldhy df`h w'lH `lyh l~ 'n ytnwl tlk lshkhSyt bdhlk "ltshkyl lHr" lw jz ln hdh lt`byr.wbl`wd@ lmtn ktb@ "`bqry@ lSdyq" rDy llh `nh, njd 'n l`qd qd 'wf~ lmm lSdyq Hqh mn ltqdyr wltwqyr fy hdhh ldrs@ bl mr. w'thbt lqr@ bm l yd` mjlan lbHth mn 'nh lSdyq qwlan wf`lan w`mlan fy kl khly'qh wshmy'lh.. fhw lkrym lsmH lwdwd.. whw l'myn fy lSdq@, wl'myn fy lsyr@, wl'myn fy lml, wl'myn fy lymn, wl'myn fy lHkwm@ l~ jnb shj`th fy lr'y wfy lqtl.. thm hw fy kl 'wly'k 'kthr mn l'myn.wlm yft l`qd fy hdhh ldrs@ 'n y`lj kl`hd bh l`dyd mn Sft lSdyq 'by bkr rDy llh `nh fy 'slwb jzl rSyn shthr bh l`qd byn ktb `Srh. fnqsh khll SfHth d`w~ lmstshrqyn w'bTyl lmbTlyn bldlyl lwDH wlHj@ lbyn@ lty l nmlk zh sw~ ltslym.wqd t'lq l`qd fy hdhh ldrs@ `ndm tSd~ llrd `l~ tlk lfry@ lkbr~ lty tqwl bh b`D '`d lslm blnsb@ lkhlf@ 'by bkr. qlt tlk lfrdy@: "n hnk tfqan sbqan wmw'mr@ dbrt byn 'by bkr w`mr w'by `byd@ ly'khdh lkhlf@ l'wl wlthny flthlth rDwn llh `lyhm.km t'lq l`qd -kdhlk- fy hdhh ldrs@ `n lSdyq 'by bkr `ndm qrn byn 'by bkr w`mr fy `lqthm blnby Sl~ llh `lyh wslm f'thbt bl'dl@ wlbrhyn 'n 'b bkr nmwdhj llqtd fy Sdr lslm, w`mr nmwdhj lljthd. wklhm kn yHb lnby wyTy`h wyHrS `l~ snth, wy`jb bh Gy@ m fy ws`h mn `jb?wfy ktbh `bqry@ `mr, mtT~ l`qd lhdh lktb Shw@ fkrh, bGy@ lHT@ b`Zm@ bTlh, fbTlh dhw lwn jdyd, w`bqryth dht Tb` fryd, wlktb lys srdan lsyr@ `mr bn lkhTb, wl `rDan ltrykh `Srh, wnm hw wSf lh, wdrs@ l'Twrh, wdll@ `l~ khSy'S `Zmth, wstfd@ mn hdhh lkhSy'S l`lm lnfs, w`lm l'khlq, wHqy'q lHy@, ldhlk rkz l`qd `l~ m yfyd hdhh ldrs@, sw ldyh 'kn mn Hdth SGyr 'm `Zym. km 'Zhr Hrjh `ndm Hwl 'n yjry mn ysmwn blktWb lmnSfyn, ldhyn yqrnwn lmdy'H blm`yb, wymzjwn lnqy'S blmnqb, wl y'twn bHsn@ l nqbw `n syy'@ tmHwh, 'w tqll mnh, wk'n sr Hrj l`qd, 'nh lm yjd `yban wl m ystHq llwm fy Hy@ `mr w'Twrh, mm j`lh ytwq` 'n ythm blmGl@ wltHyz wl`jb, dh kyf yHsb-hw 'w Gyrh-`mr bn lkhTb, wqd kn `mr yHsb nfsh b'`nf mm kn ymkn 'n yHsbh Gyrh?wsyr@ `bqry@ `thmn knt lmHT@ lrb`@ ll`qd, wsyr@ `thmn m hy l nmT mn 'nmT mt`dd@, zkhrt bh ld`w@ lslmy@ mn syr lkhlf, wGyr lkhlf k'by `byd@, wkhld, ws`d, w'mthlhm mn lSHb@ wltb`yn.. m mnhm l mn kn `Zyman bmzy@, w`lman mn '`lm ltrykh...wsyr@ `thmn l tbrz ln `bqry@ k`bqry@ lSdyq 'w lfrwq 'w lmm, wnm tbrz ln mn jnb l'ryHy@ SfH@ l tTw~, wl ystTy` l`ql lrshyd 'n yrj` bh l~ b`th Gyr b`th l`qyd@ wlymn.ldhlk lm ykn mqtl `mr kmqtl `thmn, fbwTn lHdthyn wlqym lnfsy@ lkmn@ wrhm mtbyn@, l'n `mr qtl byd dkhyl@ `l~ lslm, wbtkhTyT mn khSwm lslm, 'm `thmn... fqd qtl b'yd mslm@, Hrkh wqdh ldhm lshGbwn.wlqd tsl lktb: mdh Sn`t l`qyd@ dhn bnfws lHkmyn wlmHkwmyn? wmdh tGyr fy l'mr `m `lyh mn ftk ljhlyyn b`d qtl lmw'mnyn, wymn lkfryn? wlknh stdrk b'n l`qyd@ l tbTl lkhlf wlnz`, wl tlGy lHwdth wlkhSwmt, wl knt shllan m`Tlan lHy@ l'mm, wm`wqan lmjr~ ltrykh.wl `jb dhn n kn lns qd btlw bshrwr tfwq lkhSwmt, dh lys lmTlwb mn l`qyd@ bTlh, wnm 'n trtf` blnfws `n 'n tkwn fy Gyr sh'n, 'w sh'n hzyl Dy'yl, fdwrh lHqyqy: yqZ lqym, wtHryk lhmm.w`l~ hdh lm ykn mdr lbHth lkhSwmt wl'Hdth, wnm lqym wlmbdy' lty drt `lyh lkhSwmt wl'Hdth.. wlqd kn mdr lkhSwm@, mHsb@ lr`y@ llmm, wmHsb@ lmm lnfsh.wqrn lktb byn m kn `lyh 'bn ljhly@ wlbdy@ wHkwmt ljzyr@ l`rby@ mn GmT Hq lmHkwm fy mHsb@ lHkm, Hyth knt shr`@ lHkm wqty'dh TGynan mTlqan mn jmy` lqywd.. wbyn m wSlt lyh l'mwr fy Tr ltTwr l~ Hd mHsb@ lkhlyf@ `l~ kl SGyr@ wkbyr@, wmn kl SGyr wkbyr, whdh m Hqqth l`qyd@ lslmy@ `l~ '`qb ljhly@.. wly'n knt lmarb ldhty@ wr kl mHsb@ l`thmn, fn hdh kn `yb lHrk@, wn lm ykn `yban lHq lmHsb@, l'n mHsb@ lHkm knt qym@ jdyd@ fy lSdr l'wl mn lslm, fnd~ bh lkhS@ wl`m@, wZlt `mlan mhman fy lsys@ 'ym lkhlf@, wb`d 'n Sr lHkm mlkan mtwrthan..wlqd blG `thmn ldhrw@ fy mHsb@ nfsh, wtHrj@ mn lmss blHy@ lbshry@ wlw fy sbyl lHfZ `l~ Hyth, flm 'yqn lqtl rfD 'n ybq~ fy drh mn yqtl 'Hdan mmn yHyTwn bh, wlm Tlb mnh ltnHy 'b~, wlm ykn bw'h HrSan mnh `l~ lslTn, fl shy 'Gl~ mn lHy@ wqd hnt `lyh, wl yz`m 'Hd 'nh Gnm mn lkhlf@ mlan, fqd trk ldny wmlh dwn m kn `lyh ywm stkhlf, wlknh khf jryr@ ltnHy, wm sy`qb dhlk mn nz` wqtl.w`n Sft lmm `ly w`n shkhSyth w`n Hyth ytHdth l`qd `l~ SfHt ktbh `bqry@ lmm `ly fj lktb ry'`an blshkhSy@ lty tnwlh wbktb sTwrh. hdh fy Thr@ nsh'th w`rq@ 'rwqth, wnqd sryrth, w`lw hmth, wqw@ rdth, wGzr@ `lmh wthqfth, wrw`@ zhrh wHkmth, wSdq ymnh wshj`th, wthbth `l~ lHq wnSrth, wtDHyth fy sbylh brwHh wmhjth... wlakhr (lktb) fy jml `rDh, wSH@ nqdh, wqw@ rdh, wHlw@ lfZh, wdq@ fhmh, wbr`@ fkrh, wnbl qSdh...wqf lhw'l llGTyn wlmGlTyn blmrSd, wt`qb kl lfZ lhm wGlT, f'Zhr kydhm wlHjthm wftrhm fy d`y'hm: 'n lslm qd qm `l~ Hd lsyf, w'n mHmdan kn ysthwy lqtl, wyt`shq rw'y@ ldm, w'n dyn mHmd qd 'bH l`bwdy@, w'jz lrq, w'n t`dd zwjt mHmd kn stjb@ lldht Hsh, w'n lslm qd tkhT~ lnSf fy bHth t`dd lzwjt wtwqy` l`qwb@ `nd nshwz lzwj@, wjwz lTlq... lkh. wstT` l`qd, fy qtdr wbd`, 'n yHyl mwTn lthm, km 'rdwh, l~ mwqf `Zym@, w`bqry@, wfkhr hdh wldhy myz ktb l`qd jml `rD lmwDw`, wSdq t`byr lktb wdq@ tHlylh wrw`@ stqSy'h, why l shk smt mn smt tmyz bh l`qd.wkhtm hdh lktb b`bqry@ khld Hyth wSl l`qd msyrth fy srd fy srd syr l`bqr@ wl`Zm ldhyn knt lhm m` lbTwl@ fy trykh lslm jwlt, wldhyn knt lhm mwqf Hkm@ wshj`@ sTrh lhm ltrykh, w`trf lhm bh lqSy wldny, lSdyq wl`dw, w`l~ hdhh lSfHt yrwy `bs mHmwd l`qd syr@ wHd mn hw'l ldhyn dh` fy ldny Syth, w`l fy ltrykh Swth, wTl fy mydyn lbTwl@ shwTh, wqtrn smh blnSr, f'sh` fy nfws l'`d lfz`, wkn mjrd khtbrh llqyd@ md`@ byn jnwdh llthq@ wlTm'nyn@, wmthran lqw@ l`zm wshd@ lshkym@... nh syf llh... khld bn lwlyd.wqd st`rD lmw'lf syr@ hdh lbTl: nsh'th, shkhSyth, slmh, wlm`rk lty khDh, mrkzan `l~ 'hm lmn`Tft lty 'brzt `bqryth lqydy@, wmlqyan lDw `l~ `lqth blnby Sl~ llh `lyh wslm, wmknth `ndh, wmm ylft lnZr fy hdhh lsyr@ 'slwb l`qd lry'` ldhy ytjl~ fy srdyth lty tmt` blsls@ wbltHlyl ldhy ynfdh l~ `ql lqry' wrwHh. wlbdy` fy dhlk fy 'n lmwqf lty Swrh lmw'rkhwn `l~ 'nh makhdh `l~ hdh lbTl.. stT` lktb bfkrh ldqyq, wtHlylh l`myq, wstqSy'h lwthyq, 'n yj`lh mfkhr@ lh, l m`yb thz qdrh 'w tqll mn sh'nh... wfy hdh tkmn `Zm@ lktb, wtZhr qdrth, wtbrz shkhSyth, wtthbt `bqryth.