Not only is the mystery of the possible conspiracy never solved, and not only do we never learn if there even is a conspiracy at all, but the possible conspiracy that completely consumes the main character and starts to drive her crazy is about the freaking post office? Seriously? You are so worried that there is a possible alternative to U.S. mail that it keeps you up at night searching for clues? Honey, you need a new hobby. 
 I did enjoy the kids in the band, and there were some other vaguely amusing bits. And hey, if the book had to be pointless, at least it also had enough courtesy to be a short and quick read. But yeah. Lamest conspiracy ever.