Ingredients 
 1	1 Sociopathic Brother 
 a.	Preferably into deadly pranks and acts of snark 
 2 1 Private Detective 
 a. If possible: fat, desperate and in over his head 
 3 1 Boyfriend 
 a. Make sure he is vegan and overly preachy 
 4 1 Grandfather 
 a. From the Cold War with a love of human flesh 
 5 2 Sisters. 
 a. One Rebellious teenager with a crush and budding yearn to eat like a rabbit 
 b. One toddler who loves ribs 
 6 2 Parents 
 a. One Perfect homemaker addicted to shopping 
 b. One swarthy business man really into food 
 Mix together and create a wonderfully creative, darkly humorous tale about a family who has roots to the cannibalism some were forced to turn to during the siege of Leningrad and about six times a year they enjoy a good "feast." A.K.A They turn some poor sucker into a banquet of human flesh (it tastes like pork!) and revel in how much more superior they are than other humans. 
 Let it stew for at least 24 hours and come to the realization you are rooting for the family to succeed, not get caught by the snooping private eye and hopefully digest the annoying vegan boy enticing their daughter away from her life as a carnivore. 
 Serve freshly after reading and be appalled at how the book borders on gross and making you hungry at the same time with the author's delicious writing style. 
 Should serve: As many as you like, in fact shove this into the hands of strangers and beg them to read it.