Trigger warnings for: sexual abuse, suicide, self-harm, victim blaming, sexism, and substance abuse. 
 "My body is not my own any more. They have stamped their names all over it." 
 I read this book months ago and always intended on writing a review for it, I just... never did? This is a hard book to talk about, and an exceptionally hard one to review. On one hand, the message and themes in this book are crucial and need to be openly discussed. This book challenges you to think about victim blaming, and because of that - I always look back and think it was a great book. But on the other hand, as a narrative: It was weak, but realistic (look at that, I'm arguing with myself.) I figured I'd just make a list of pros and cons and contradict myself because some of the things I dislike, are what made it really stand out for me. 
 The Good 
 - This book is realistic, the protagonist is honest and so deeply flawed. As a person, she's self-centred, she lies and steals from her friends, she's condescending and hypocritical, she's unlikeable but she's a real person. People like her exist in the world. Does that mean we should her treat her any less because she's a shit person, in comparison to a warm and kind-hearted victim? 
 - It looks at our society's attitude on rape, slut shaming, and victim blaming in a modern setting. Emma herself is quick to slut shame others, and tells a friend that was raped, that she wasn't because she "didn't say no". Pictures of her body are spread online, and her story goes viral. People all around the world felt entitled to share their opinion on whether she was raped, or asking for it. They critiqued and reviewed her body, so much she began to see herself as nothing but pink flesh and open legs. 
 - Her characterization and mental illness are real - and believable, it's not done in a way that romanticises mental illness, or used as a cute little quirk (thank god). It's honest, and it's brutal. She dissociates and isolates herself from everyone. She goes through PTSD. She attempts suicide, and self-harms. She's an entirely different person in the second half of the book than she is in the first half and it's so honest. 
 The Bad 
 -All the side characters are completely forgettable. You're thrown into teenage dating life, and expected to remember who's dating who, who's crushing on who, and who's fucked who. This shit is tiresome. 
 - The beginning is slow and tedious to get through. 
 - Emma is an arsehole and so ridiculously unlikeable, but refer to the first point of the good. 
 - THE ENDING - I can understand why Louise O'Neil did it, I just couldn't help but need more. 
 - I just feel like it fell flat, the second half - though understandable, dragged on. We see Emma's mental state and its heart breaking, but it didn't need to be that long. Her thoughts are realistic and honest to someone with ptsd, but it's hard to get through. 
 "I am not falling apart. I am being ripped at the seams, my insides torn out until I am hollow." 
 "I like it better when my room is pitch black, when the dark is so thick it swallows me up and I feel as if I could drown in it."