You might love this book if you love Zooey Deschanel's adorkable-types and the manic pixie dream bullshit, but if you're like me and 1) mute, 2) change the channel every time you see her face on TV, this book will make you want to rip your hair out strand by strand. The main character's name is Sunshine. 
 I have high standards for horror, and this book doesn't meet any of them. It was a watered-down version of Dark Water (no pun intended) with a sad attempt at using Fatal Frame's photography schtick with the most annoyingly cute and perky character in the entire fucking world. She is so cute! She is so sweet! She is so clumsy! 
 She never curses! 
 "Jeezus Loueezus," I sigh, wrapping my fingers around my phone and standing. I turn my neck from side to side. The air between my bones crackles and pops when I move. "I feel like an old lady," I say out loud. 
 I wanted to strangle her 5 pages into the book! The moments of fear are made absolutely anticlimactic because of how stupid and idiotic and childish the main character seems. 
 "Good golly!" I shout, folding my arms across my chest and balling my hands into fists. My heart is racing. Another chill runs down my spine, and then another, and another, until it feels like I'll never be warm again. I sit on my bed and shiver, my heart pounding. 
 Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that a character has to curse to be believable. I'm saying she has to be realistic, and a manic pixie dream girl in a horror just makes the entire book seem completely laughable. 
 Imagine Zooey Deschanel being adorkable in a horror movie. That's what this book is. I'm more inclined to laugh than be afraid. 
 The main character is so forcedly cute. She is an epitome of the weird (yet adorable!) girl trope. She is super fucking special, being: 
 1. Adopted, and she's so special because of it. 
 Softly I say, "I'm adopted." 
 "What?" Nolan asks, still not looking up from his book. 
 "I'm adopted," I repeat louder, and start pacing at a normal speed. 
 "You're right," he nods. "But those tons of people aren't in the situation you're in." 
 2. With such wonderfully different eyes 
 And my eyes are green, not gray like Mom's. Ashley says they look like cat's eyes. You know how some people's eyes change color depending on the light or what they're wearing? Not mine. They're always the same milky, light kind of green. And even in the dark my pupils never get big. I've literally never seen anyone with eyes that look like mine. 
 3. She's so different because she dresses differently than everyone else! She wears pajamas with puppies on them, as well as footie pajamas (oh, wait, that was 8th grade!) 
 I don't dress like a crazy person or anything like that; I just don't dress like most of the other kids I know either. I like crocheted hats and scarves, T-shirts with funny little icons on them, and long sleeves that hang past my wrists. 
 4. She talks to her dog, collects unicorns, has a stuffed taxidermy owl called Dr. Hoo, and loves art and photography! Math and sciences? Fuck that! 
 I allow myself to zone out a little bit and count the minutes until third period, the only class I really care about: visual arts. 
 Really. I hate, hate, hate adorkable characters, and this book was nearly intolerable. There was very little fearful about it. I had a better time watching Dark Water. If you wanted a good horror book, go read the most excellent Anna Dressed in Blood.