I've been teetering between a 4 and 5 star rating for this book since I finished it early yesterday and it's taken me until now to finally settle on the 5. I absolutely ADORED this novel, and while there were a few small things that I personally didn't enjoy having in the story, I understand why they were placed there and at the end of the day, those small things didn't bother me enough to warrant giving this book anything other than a 5 star. I'll be filming a full review of this book so when that's up on my channel I will be linking it here. 
 Youtube Review: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAZKq... 
 Let's just get this out of the way because if not I will be gushing about it for the entirety of this review, I absolutely adore Adam Silvera's writing. I read his first book More Happy Than Not at the beginning of 2016 and devoured it and ever since, Adam Silvera's books are an instabuy for me so when I heard this book was to be released this year I knew it was going to be in my hands. Adam as this ability to play my emotions like the sensitive little violin that they are and this book was a shining example of that. I would go from giggling like the giddy gal I am to having my heart ripped out and thrown into the garbage disposal and ripped to shreds. I would go from laughing to violently sobbing in a matter of minutes. The best way I can phrase this is that I suffered from 
 I think that this book tackled the subject of grief and growth from loss beautifully. Flipping back and forth from the present day and the history was such a gorgeous touch. Honestly, I was initially worried flipping between two different points of time but Adam kept this wonderfully organized and it was not hard for me to follow along with either of the different timelines at all. 
 Also, the representation of OCD was OUTSTANDING!! As someone who has been diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder for close to 10 years, it is very hard for me to read books with Main Characters that have OCD because those characters tend to fall into certain stereotypes commonly placed on those with OCD (cleaning, for example) and I'm so happy that this not only strayed away from that ever-present subset of the disorder but that our main character had compulsions and ticks that I could personally relate to. I think that the way Griffin describes his compulsions and ticks was beautiful and it was completely relatable. 
 I think that the history aspects that show Theo&Griffin from the beginning of their relationship until the end was so heartwarming and to go from reading about these beautiful moments between these two and fall in love with their relationship only to jump back to the present to Griffin mourning Theo was so traumatizing to my state, but in a good way? 
 I love the development of Griffin's character as the story progresses and how his grief and the way that he grows does feel very authentic. The subject of grief is a difficult one to deal with because everyone has experienced it in one way or another and everybody grieves and learns to grow from losses in different ways and I think the aspect of grief was handled beautifully. 
 (view spoiler)[Truth be told I was incredibly worried that Griffin was going to automatically fall in love with somebody else right after Theo's funeral. I've seen it done in novels before and it never feels genuine. Granted, I kind of hated the fact that him and Jackson had sex but I understood that they were both emotionally vulnerable and it was a way for Griffin to get over the fact that something he shared so intimately with Theo was just passed on to the next guy that he had dated. I am glad that Jackson and Griffin didn't immediately start dating out of mutual association to Theo, that was my biggest worry going into the novel but I'm glad I didn't have to see that played out. (hide spoiler)] 
 The characters felt so real and I had the same feeling about this when I read Adam Silvera's previous book. He knows how to create authentic characters that are honest and they all have their own personalities and issues and none of them feel unbelievable or like they are too "quirky" just for the sake of being quirky characters. 
 I could gush for quite some time about this book and I won't delve too deeply into spoilers, I'm going to leave that for my Youtube review. All in all, this book was absolutely fantastic and I highly recommend it, and Adam Silvera's books in general, to anybody!