I actually read this a couple years ago, and liked it SO MUCH, and highlighted SO MUCH on my Kindle that I've been waiting to post a review until I could think of the best thing to say about it. But let's just say it's that good. So eye-opening that it makes this introvert wait two years to find the right way to talk about its greatness. 
 Favorite quotes (only a selection!): 
 The trick for introverts is to honor their own styles instead of allowing themselves to be swept up by prevailing norms. 
 In other words, introverts are capable of acting like extroverts for the sake of work they consider important, people they love, or anything they value highly. 
 I have found that there are three key steps to identifying your own core personal projects. 
 First, think back to what you loved to do when you were a child. How did you answer the question of what you wanted to be when you grew up? The specific answer you gave may have been off the mark, but the underlying impulse was not. 
 Second, pay attention to the work you gravitate to. 
 Finally, pay attention to what you envy. Jealousy is an ugly emotion, but it tells the truth. You mostly envy those who have what you desire. 
 "Emotional labor," which is the effort we make to control and change our own emotions, is associated with stress, burnout, and even physical symptoms like an increase in cardiovascular disease. 
 Scores of studies have shown that venting doesn't soothe anger; it fuels it. We're best off when we don't allow ourselves to go to our angry place. 
 So when introverts assume the observer role, as when they write novels, or contemplate unified field theory--or fall quiet at dinner parties--they're not demonstrating a failure of will or a lack of energy. They're simply doing what they're constitutionally suited for. 
 But Ethan's problem, says Dr. Miller, was not depression but a classic case of poor "parent-child fit." 
 When ultimately she learns to swim like a fish, she has reached a crucial turning point in her relationship not only with water but also with fear. 
 And make sure to get there early. It's much easier to be one of the earlier guests, so your child feels as if other people are joining him in a space that he "owns," rather than having to break into a preexisting group. 
 Why do we accept this one-size-fits-all situation as a given when we know perfectly well that adults don't organize themselves this way? We often marvel at how introverted, geeky kids "blossom" into secure and happy adults. We liken it to a metamorphosis. However, maybe it's not the children who change but their environments. As adults, they get to select the careers, spouses, and social circles that suit them. They don't have to live in whatever culture they're plunked into. Research from a field known as "person-environment fit" shows that people flourish when, in the words of psychologist Brian Little, they're "engaged in occupations, roles or settings that are concordant with their personalities." 
 At the Foley Center for the Study of Lives at Northwestern University, McAdams studies the stories that people tell about themselves. We all write our life stories as if we were novelists, McAdams believes, with beginnings, conflicts, turning points, and endings. And the way we characterize our past setbacks profoundly influences how satisfied we are with our current lives. Unhappy people tend to see setbacks as contaminants that ruined an otherwise good thing ("I was never the same again after my wife left me"), while generative adults see them as blessings in disguise ("The divorce was the most painful thing that ever happened to me, but I'm so much happier with my new wife"). Those who live the most fully realized lives--giving back to their families, societies, and ultimately themselves--tend to find meaning in their obstacles. In a sense, McAdams has breathed new life into one of the great insights of Western mythology: that where we stumble is where our treasure lies. 
 The trick is not to amass all the different kinds of available power, but to use well the kind you've been granted.