4.5 stars 
 Our roles in each other's lives had been to every extreme. 
 Bully and victim. 
 Friend. 
 Champion. 
 Lover. 
 The prologue begins with Ellie telling the readers that we will love Flynn and hate her. I know what she meant, but I couldn't hate her. Because the person I hated was in the past, and the present-day Ellie, while containing aspects of that former person, was trying to move beyond her past. And for that I could feel bad for her past and wonder at her present. 
 I was back and forth with my feelings towards Ellie, but as I said, I couldn't simply hate her, no matter how much I wanted to. She was so reactionary in high school and as much as she thought she was being a friend, she was very much a follower. She was a bully to Flynn just as often as she was his friend. But her self realization of her actions caused permanent changes to take root in her, and that was the most fascinating aspect of her character. 
 Flynn was such a great portrayal of a person with Aspergers. He is literal, direct, and socially awkward. Taking on a character with a disability like Aspergers is a bold move for A. Meredith, and man does she do it well. It made me think about how she handled Clayton's mental illness in the Find You in the Dark series and as much as I loved how she handed that, I felt like this was heads and shoulders above. 
 Ellie and Flynn had a rocky friendship in high school. They both saw something in each other, a kindred spirit of sorts, but Ellie refused to let the friendship develop naturally. Instead, they were secret friends, with mixed signals being constant sent depending on whether they were at school or at Flynn's house. When they meet again years later, both are reminded of the past while building a new friendship. The extent of the past's influence was rocky and deep, as the events that led to the last time they saw each other come to light. 
 The POV shifts were an interesting choice. Flynn's POV comes through only in the flashback scenes. The present day is told solely from Ellie's POV. I think this may be why I had an easier time sympathizing with Ellie. We knew where her head was at the whole time during the present day timeline, while Flynn's flashbacks set up where his head was at even in those present day scenes. 
 Ellie's other friends, Dania, Stu, Shaun, and Reggie, were a pack of delinquents and bullies. Even years after high school, they are always looking for the next party, ignoring responsibility and the possibility of a future doing anything but the same. When any one of them showed up in a scene? I was instantly on edge. I didn't like the Ellie that repeatedly showed up when her friends were around, especially seeing that she could be different when they weren't around. But I guess that's part of small town living -- the inability to get away from people from your past. 
 The end of the book happened kind of quickly for my liking, as far as the pacing of the rest of the book goes. Based on the interactions between Ellie and Flynn, it makes sense that it was a quick resolution, but it did leave me feeling a little bewildered at the direction things had taken. 
 This book challenged me. I loved it. I cringed. I may have cried a little bit. But ultimately? It was great. It had characters who weren't perfect, but were working towards making themselves better versions of themselves. There was plenty of emotional tension and confusion. It was generally a good read, if not necessarily a happy one. 
 Thanks to A. Meredith Walters for providing me with an arc in exchange for an honest review.