Oh how lovely to be a zombie unicorn!! Unfortunately, we may never know... 
 Zombie unicorns are of peace, always! 
 For a very long time, the great conundrum of the world has been this: Zombies? Or unicorns? 
 It seemed something had come along to finally resolve this issue: ZOMBIE UNICORNS!! But things are not as they seem. Dun, dun, dun. 
 By the way, this book is a free download from John Green, just click on the book page and hit 'download ebook'. Then par-tay!!! 
 I had a conversation, albeit somewhat imaginary, with Mia Featherstone, the protagonist of this John Green novella entitled Zombicorns. 
 Me: Zombie unicorns, you say? 
 Mia: Well, no, actually it's NOT zombie unicorns. 
 Me: Whhhhhhhhhat? No Zombie Unicorns??!! Noooooooooo! Goodbye, cruel world! 
 Mia: No, no. This is even more awesome because it's zombie "corn". Get it? 
 Me: Errrrrr? *tilts head* 
 Mia: You know, corn? Like the food. It's yellow, with rows of kernels. 
 Me: Aaaaand that's better than zombie unicorns how? 
 Mia: Because the zombies care for and plant the corn. They're like undead uncoordinated zombie corn farmers. 
 Me: Uh-huh. 
 Mia: But it's good, because corn is awesome. 
 Me: Zombies plant corn? WHY THE FRAK DO THEY PLANT CORN?! 
 Mia: They've been infected by a virus through eating corn and they want to bring that corn to everyone because of said virus. 
 Me: Ah. So it's not zombified unicorns! It's zombies eating corn?. 
 Mia: Uh, kinda. It's just - they don't actually eat the corn once they are infected. They either eat people or force the people to eat corn. 
 Me: They don't eat the corn, they just plant it? 
 Mia: Yep. 
 Me: Well, regardless. I really did enjoy your story - really entertaining. Oh, I loved your dog, Mr. President. 
 Mia: Gee thanks. 
 Me: As much as I liked it, I'm glad you kept your story short because I just don't know how long zombies planting corn would stay interesting. 
 Mia: Understood. 
 Me: Are you sure there aren't any unicorns? 
 Mia: No unicorns. No rainbows. Sorry. 
 Me: Frak! Oh, on a side note. It seems that you like to use the term "frak". Is John Green a fan of Battlestar Galactica? 
 Mia: Who's John Green?! *eyes start to glaze over* 
 Me: What do you mean? He's the guy that wrote yo... Oh, uh, never mind. Forget I said anything. 
 Mia: What are talking about?! Who the frak is John Green? *roars and goes dead behind the eyes* 
 Me: No one. No one. Uh, interview over!! *runs away screaming* I'm never eating corn, EVER AGAIN!