dnf @ 30%. (IaEUR(tm)ve decided not to rate this but I feel like if I had bothered to keep going it would probably fall somewhere between 1.5 and 2 stars.) 
 oopsaEUR|aEUR|oh noaEUR|aEUR|looks like IaEUR(tm)m not gonna finish thisaEUR|aEUR|aEUR|so sadaEUR|aEUR|aEUR|aEUR|aEUR|.aEUR|jk jk I am not even remotely close to giving a shit about any of this, I am out. 
 actual representation of my thoughts while reading this book: A-\_(af,,)_/A- 
 The plot and worldbuilding felt like very standard, cookie cutter (read as: basic, cliched, and boring as hell) ya fantasy, and it read like bad fanfiction. this is a medieval fantasy story, and while I get that the author was trying to do something different here by writing with a more modern voice, I couldnaEUR(tm)t stand it. 3/5 of the main characters were obnoxious af, and 100% of them felt like caricatures of trashy reality tv characters. 
 anyway, shoutout to em and may