So heartbreaking. Be prepared to cry. And cry. And then cry some more. 
 Lexie's brother, Ty, committed suicide at age 16. A popular, basketball star, with tons of friends and yet decided to end it in only his junior year of high school. And she feels horrible guilt. Why did he do it? And why didn't she see the signs? Why didn't she talk to him? Why couldn't she help him? Should she blame her dad for leaving them? His ex-girlfriend? Life doesn't have simple answers though. 
 Lexie pushes her friends away. Like you would expect she is having a really hard time dealing with her grief. Her therapist told her to write a journal so there is a mixture of journal entries and her recalling her past with her brother. Lexie also tries to figure out if there was a specific reason why he decided to end his life that day. She connects with his old friends and girlfriend. 
 Dealing with a death in the family affects everyone differently. There is no right way to help a friend or daughter or girlfriend out of it. Some of her thoughts and reactions are definitely ones I was familiar with and other ones were not. Lexie reconnected with a neighbor that helped her through it but then it was sad because her best friend was trying so hard to help. But sometimes you just need the unexpected. 
 I loved Lexie's boyfriend Steven. He was the cutest, sweetest, math nerd. Such a good guy! Lexie needed time though and pushed him away too. I loved that he really never gave up on her though. And as mean to him as she was he would come when she needed him. The flashbacks to their past were so sweet, adorable, and romantic! I really wanted them to find their way back to each other. 
 While I normally don't read sad books I took a chance on this one because I loved the Unearthly series by Cynthia Hand and I'm glad I did. It was really moving. At the end the author shares that her own brother committed suicide at age 17 while she was age 20. The book is fiction but I definitely think those real feelings of loss came through in her writing and made this a really touching, realistic, important, and worthy read. 
 "Happy six months. Which is precisely 183 days." You consulted your watch. "Which is 4,392 hours. Which is 263,520 minutes. Which have been some of the best minutes of my life. So far." 
 God, you were so sexy. 
 Irresistible. 
 *I borrowed an ARC and this does not affect my review*