(What I loved) 
 Most every single character. I love him when he's old. He's adorable in his "prime" (EVEN GINGER!). He's innocent and trusting. Camel. He's awesome and vulnerable, yet old and mean. August. He's kind, he's a little off his rocket, he's controlling, he's dangerous. Gruen created real people, real situations. Gruen created life. 
 The exposition. The "travel to my youth." The flashback to the past. How he ended up in the circus. 
 Basically everything about this novel was splendid except for this: the moral quality. 
 (What I hated) 
 Granted, I only got through half of it. In my defense however, I stopped when he said "Let me inside you," as he engaged in intercourse with a married woman in a shabby hotel room. not my cup of tea. seriously, though, it was disgusting. 
 That wasn't the first "adult" scene, either. The novel has a theme of loss-of-innocence, and Gruen was not shy with details. Gruen's frank and candid prose was perfect and fitting, and I suppose that literary acknowledgement says I should applaud its reality and honesty. 
 However, I disagree to this point of Gruen's premise, and so to read it so vividly-- like some erotic crap vampire novel-- was disgusting. Call me old fashioned, but nothing should warrant adultery and the betrayal of a spouse with another man. Nothing should warrant the violation of vows you've made to him. 
 Especially, I feel as if the two did not have a chance to actually develop a real love relationship. More, it was forbidden love, it was "rebound" sex, it was exploration and eroticism. Maybe Gruen was making a statement out of it, maybe about human nature, but all I heard was "It's okay, because he's a bad person. It's okay, because they split up. It's okay because they care about each other." All I thought was "This is not okay." 
 So despite all that I really loved, desperately admired, and longed after in this novel, I had to put it down. And that hurt.