This book is terrible. It made me anxious, depressed, furious, and deeply upset, it kept me awake in the early hours, and there were times when I had to gently but firmly set it down, go outside, and take some deep breaths. 
 Thank you, Robin Hobb, for ruining my life with characters who are alternately so good and sweet and brave that all I want is to cuddle them until all their problems are gone (I would be cuddling for eternity) and who are so utterly odious that I want to deeply embarrass them in front of all their friends before smashing their faces in with a spoon. 
 Case in point: Fitz, who is growing up big and strong and fighty but remains a sad sweet cinnamon roll. Plus his new friend Nighteyes, who upon his appearance prompted me to vow that if he died, I would write a very emotional letter to Hobb. (Did I have to write said letter? You'll have to find out...). 
 Then there was Regal. I thought I hated Regal after Assassin's Apprentice. Oh, sweet summer child. I had no idea. 
 Regal is a bit like Joffrey, in that he's 100% vile and awful but he's also a very entertaining character. I say this in hindsight, since during the actual reading I hissed between my teeth a lot. There were also his lackeys, who both Fitz and I debated murdering almost every time he ran into them. 
 There are a few bright glimpses of sunlight through the oppressive shade that is Regal and co., however. Patience and Kettricken continue to be wonderful, complicated, strong heroines. I really liked Burrich in the first novel, but in this one I LOVED him. The Fool gets a bit more background, although he is still a mysterious, strange figure. 
 Safe to say, this novel has double the danger and violence than Assassin's Apprentice. The red ship raids and forging continue. There is more fighting. The political machinations are vast, infuriating and lead down some very dark paths. The last 100 pages were uncomfortable for me to read, because of the sheer level of hopelessness. I had to finish it in one sitting simply because I couldn't bear to leave myself and the characters in limbo! 
 So heed my warning: this book will ruin you. Like it's predecessor, it's slowly paced, but this only serves to build up such a sense of foreboding that you'll be suffocating in bad thoughts by the end of it. Thank you, Robin Hobb, for making me feel human emotions for fictional characters again.