Ads that rely on shock humor need to actually be funny and also to make sense. This one falls short of both duties. The dreamy sequence we see involving a guy’s grandpa taking the cover off a sleek new Audi electric vehicle to present it to him is actually -- surprise! -- his pre-death thoughts as he almost chokes on a cashew at his cubicle. But why would grandpa have an E-car? Why is almost dying in the most mundane way funny? You could argue that, between the lines, Audi is saying: Buy this cool new car before it’s too late to enjoy anything. But I’ve gotta believe there are better ways to say that than a beneficent relative fantasy and a nut blocking a windpipe. Also: a fellow working in that particular cubicle farm, from the small-time looks of it, would probably be stretching to get leather in his Camry, never mind a brand new E-Audi. Heck, I’m surprised he was snacking on cashews.<doc-sep>Super Bowl Sunday! It’s here at last, the national holiday when we have to sit through football in order to watch those beloved ads. Yahoo Sports’ Liz Roscher (@lizroscher) is here to walk you through the ridiculous, the sublime, the cheesy, and the annoying of this year’s ads, updated live as they air. As always, we rate ads on a completely unscientific and utterly biased basis; feel free to offer contrasting opinions in the comments below. Let’s make with the grading! Grade: A Hyundai, “The Elevator” I could have watched another two minutes of elevator operator Jason Bateman dropping people off to experience painful, uncomfortable, and generally unpleasant moments. Bateman found the perfect level of Bateman-ness for this commercial, too. Snarky, but not in an attention-getting way. Doritos, “Now It’s Hot” There has never been a collaboration less necessary than Chance The Rapper and the Backstreet Boys, and yet the commercial was entertaining and nostalgic. They might want to get that car spewing bright yellow exhaust checked out, though. It’s probably not supposed to do that. Trailer, “Captain Marvel” Is there any way CBS could air that “Captain Marvel” trailer at every commercial break? Because it’s phenomenal. Trailer, “Hobbs & Shaw” Idris Elba. The Rock. Jason Statham. The song “Why Can’t We Be Friends.” Some may say the world doesn’t need another sequel to “The Fast and the Furious,” but they are all wrong. Expensify, “Expensify This” It’s hard to make an expense management tool sexy. Or funny. Or even remotely interesting. But in their first ever TV ad, they managed to hit two of those three. (It doesn’t matter what they do, an expense management tool will never be sexy.) Chalk it up to the inescapable magnetism of 2 Chainz and… Adam Scott? OK, sure. Toyota, “Toni” Toyota shunned celebrities this year and featured the story of Toni, who is trying to become the first female player in the NFL. Maybe one day we’ll get the chance to root for her in the big game. Story continues NFL, “NFL 100 Celebration” When you get all of the NFL’s best and most legendary players in one room, the dream is for a football game to break out. This is a phrase that isn’t said very much, but it has to be said: the NFL got this one exactly right. Tom Brady even managed to act like a human instead of a handsome football robot! Truly an accomplishment. Devour, “Food Porn” The full version of this ad, which actually contained the word “porn,” was banned from the Super Bowl, which is a shame because it’s really funny. The less outrageous version still makes its point, though. Who knew anyone had such strong feelings about frozen food? Bud Light, “Game of Thrones” Well this didn’t end the way anyone thought it would. Someone does say “Dilly, Dilly” in this ad, but the “Game of Thrones” dragon flies in and lays the entire jousting scene to waste. It’s pretty satisfying. Skechers, “Romo Mode” It’s pretty apparent that 2019 is The Year of Romo. None of the jokes in this commercial are all that clever, but Tony Romo is just so charming that he makes it work. And the visual of him celebrating on the golf course next to an enormous crater of a hole is pretty delightful. Microsoft, “We All Win” Does anyone have a box of tissues? Because this commercial pulls at the heartstrings in all the right ways. It’s sweet and understated, and doesn’t try to make you think video games are the most important thing in the world. But to a disabled kid who just wants to be just like their friends, video games are one of the most important things in the world. Burger King, “Eat Like Andy” Andy Warhol Burger King commercial? Automatic A. No question. Amazon Alexa, “Not Everything Makes the Cut” It’s pretty rich for Amazon to mock unnecessary smart devices, but this ad is witty and clever without being too broad. From Forest Whitaker putting his toothbrush speaker into his mouth to the Broad City ladies getting blasted out of their hot tub by an overactive water feature, it’s all gold. And the world needs a movie starring Harrison Ford and his smart-alec dog who communicates through Alexa. Get on it, Amazon. Grade: B M&M, “Bad Passengers” Were you relieved that the M&Ms were trapped in a chocolate bar and weren’t actually Christina Applegate’s children somehow? That’s a whole can of worms no one wants opened. Hulu, “The Handmaid’s Tale” Season 3 Trailer The third season of Hulu’s series based on the 1985 novel looks just as dystopian as the first two. The trailer gives you that sense of existential dread that you want in a series about a terrifying authoritarian government. WeatherTech, “Scout” WeatherTech has introduced a line of safe and durable food bowls for your pet, which is great because it means we got to see a commercial with adorable dogs! Wouldn’t your workplace be better if a dog like Scout was wandering around doing what good doggos do? Trailer, “Avengers: Endgame” “Some people move on. But not us.” That sounds ominous. Captain America gives a pained look. Iron Man is welding something. There’s fog over New York City. C’mon, “Avengers,” give us more! T-Mobile, “Unlimited” We all have that friend who texts you a novel when you were just looking for a sentence or two. If you don’t have that friend, bad news: that friend is you. T-Mobile also aired a few additional spots featuring everyone’s worst texting habits, like typing 500 different responses before finally sending one, or responding too quickly. Pringles, “Sad Device” Be honest: you don’t want to know the deep inner thoughts of your virtual assistant, either. Google, “100 Billion Words” The search engine and tech empire knows how to bring the feels. It’s not hard to figure out what the three most translated phrases are, but Google knows the right way to tell you. Avocados From Mexico, “Top Dog” There may be a time when an ad about humans who look like their dogs isn’t funny, but that time isn’t now.<doc-sep>Yes, the New England Patriots may have won Super Bowl LIII, but for many of us, all that matters is the commercials. So which ones captivated our attention this time around? From Cardi B rocking Pepsi-themed nails to Chance the Rapper remixing The Backstreet Boys’ “I Want It That Way” and everything in between, here are Billboard’s picks for the best and worst commercials of the night.<doc-sep>Some were good, others bad and a few downright ugly. Super Bowl advertisements touched every edge of the consumer spectrum on Sunday during one of the NFL's most forgettable championship finales of all-time. But for many Americans who aren't enamored with the New England Patriots or Los Angeles Rams, the four-block of TV time on CBS provided ample time for long-anticipated commercials. Several of the best ads were pre-released on YouTube, but unless you surfed social media all weekend, chances are many slipped through the cracks and you were seeing them for the first time among a noisy Super Bowl party and people stepping in front of your viewing space. A 30-second spot in 2019 cost $5.25 million, the largest ever during the nation's most-watched television event. So companies need not miss the mark with that large of a marketing investment during timeouts. Now that the dust has settled, here's a look at our 10 favorite Super Bowl commercials. Let's us know your preferred ads in the comments below:<doc-sep>
Now that the Super Bowl ads are out in the wild, it's time to do what human beings do best: rank things in an orderly fashion. On Sunday night, the New England Patriots defeated the Los Angeles Rams 13-3 in Super Bowl LIII. You could watch highlights of the game, or you could join us in ranking the ads. Which is weird, pointless and perfectly representative of what it means to be a human being in the year 2019. But it's also fun. And look -- there were some good ones. Actually, one really, really good one that might have been the highlight of the whole Super Bowl. There was a pretty good crop of commercials this year. Here, in order of what we thought ruled, are some of the best Super Bowl ads, starting with that one with kids playing the Xbox. 1. Microsoft: 'We all win' Regular gaming controllers don't always work for children with disabilities. That's where Microsoft's Xbox Adaptive Controller comes in. "I never thought it was unfair," one young gamer says in the company's ad. "I just thought, 'Hey, this is the way it is and it's not going to change.'" Ads aren't supposed to make people cry. 2. The Batmobile swings by Walmart Classic movie cars like the Back to the Future DeLorean, the Ecto-1 from Ghostbusters and Scooby Doo's Mystery Machine rush to Walmart to pick up groceries in the company's commercial. Reads the tagline: "Order groceries online. Pickup for free. No matter what you drive." 3. The Mountain destroys the Bud Knight I cannot believe the marketing execs over at Budweiser allowed the CANON BUD KNIGHT to be destroyed by The Mountain from Game of Thrones. This is sacrilege. This will not stand. 4. Washington Post thanks journalists Yes, that was Tom Hanks' measured, familiar voice getting all Ken Burns-ified in a Washington Post ad for that highlighted the role of journalism, and honored those who'd risked or given their life for it, such as slain Post columnist Jamal Khashoggi. The ad sparked some controversy -- from Donald Trump Jr., for one, and Post journalists who say the paper could've found a better use for its money. But even though "Democracy Dies in Darkness" is still an eye-roller of alliteration, this is a well-done ad. 5. 2 Chainz won't keep his receipts Do rappers really have to photograph receipts for the bling they buy? Adam Scott tries to get 2 Chainz to save paper receipts for his seafood towers and sports car made of ice, but the rapper has Expensify for that. You can also watch the whole video, which features a gold toilet. They made a song for this. 6. Amazon drafts astronauts, Harrison Ford Alexa, the voice of Amazon's Echo, can do many things, but as seen in this ad, perhaps she shouldn't allow Harrison Ford's dog to order its own food, or connect podcasts to Forest Whitaker's electric toothbrush. If an ad has Harrison Ford, you know it's a big deal. 7. Alexa wants a Pringle Two guys are stacking different varieties of Pringles to make unusual flavor combinations, but their Alexa smart device wants in on the fun. Sometimes, it can be sad to be a robot. We selected this, purely for the Funky Town bit. Inspired. 8. Bublé vs Bubly Singer Michael Bublé is apparently irritated that the flavored water Bubly almost, but not quite, has copied his name. In this clip, he's caught in a convenience store marking up the cans. Sorry, I just can't resist Bublé and his overwhelming charisma. 9. Hyundai's hellish elevator Hyundai's commercial has actor Jason Bateman as the manager of a elevator to all kinds of horrible situations, including jury duty, car shopping and sitting in the middle seat of a plane next to a sick passenger. The latter highlights Hyundai's Shopper Assurance program. One of those ads that's just... actually funny? 10. Backstreet Boys meet Chance the Rapper In two short teasers for a Doritos ad, 1990s boy-banders The Backstreet Boys seem to be auditioning Chance the Rapper for a role in their band, but he's just not getting that patented Backstreet choreography down. 11. Pepsi gets defensive Pepsi plays off the fact that people wanting a cola tend to ask for their rival, Coke, and are often asked by the servers if a Pepsi is OK. Overhearing this exchange, Steve Carell defends the drink, and gets a little help from Lil Jon and Cardi B.