The controvertists, answered my father, assign two-and-twenty different reasons for it: --others, indeed, who have drawn their pens on the opposite side of the question, have shewn the world the futility of the greatest part of them. --But then again, our best polemic divines --I wish there was not a polemic divine, said _Yorick_, in the kingdom; --one ounce of practical divinity--is worth a painted ship-load of all their reverences have imported these fifty years. --Pray, Mr. _Yorick_, quoth my uncle _Toby_, --do tell me what a polemic divine is? ----The best description, captain _Shandy_, I have ever read, is of a couple of 'em, replied _Yorick_, in the account of the battle fought single hands betwixt _Gymnast_ and captain _Tripet_; which I have in my pocket. ----I beg I may hear it, quoth my uncle _Toby_ earnestly. --You shall, said _Yorick_. --And as the corporal is waiting for me at the door, --and I know the description of a battle will do the poor fellow more good than his supper, --I beg, brother, you'll give him leave to come in. --With all my soul, said my father. ----_Trim_ came in, erect and happy as an emperor; and having shut the door, _Yorick_ took a book from his right-hand coat-pocket, and read, or pretended to read, as follows.

'Historians,' answered my father, 'give two-and-twenty different reasons for it: - others have shown how futile most of these are. But then again, our best polemic divines-'
'I wish there was not a polemic divine in the kingdom,' said Yorick. 'One ounce of practical divinity is worth a painted ship-load of all that their reverences have imported these fifty years.'
'Pray, Mr. Yorick,' quoth my uncle Toby, 'do tell me what a polemic divine is?'
'The best description I have read, captain Shandy,' replied Yorick, 'is the account of a couple of 'em in the battle fought hand to hand betwixt Gymnast and captain Tripet; which I have in my pocket.'
'May I hear it?' asked my uncle Toby earnestly.
'You shall,' said Yorick.
'As the corporal is waiting for me at the door, and I know the description of a battle will do the poor fellow more good than his supper, I beg, brother, you'll let him come in.'
'With all my soul,' said my father.
Trim came in, erect and happy as an emperor; and having shut the door, Yorick took a book from his coat-pocket, and read, or pretended to read, as follows.