What these perplexities of my uncle _Toby_ were, ----'tis impossible for you to guess; --if you could, --I should blush; not as a relation, --not as a man, --nor even as a woman, --but I should blush as an author; inasmuch as I set no small store by myself upon this very account, that my reader has never yet been able to guess at anything. 
What my uncle Toby's perplexities were - 'tis impossible for you to guess; if you could, I should blush; because as an author, I pride myself on the fact that my reader has never yet been able to guess anything. 