( Oprah.com ) -- At a certain point , everybody needs a guidebook . Columnist Leigh Newman reveals her most helpful no-nos and yes-yeses . 1 . A true sign of love is giving your partner the soft pillow . 2 . Always give money to the girl with the violin or the guy with the guitar . 3 . Never leave a hospital with a newborn but without a birth certificate . 4 . Everybody loves a doughnut . Everybody . Even divorce lawyers . 5 . If you think you need concealer , you need concealer . 6 . Thank-you notes . Always . Oprah.com : 10 reasons to feel good about the future . 7 . Leggings are not pants . 8 . When you see someone you know but do n't feel like talking to them , do n't look at the grass in the park or study a jar of mayonnaise on the supermarket shelf and pretend you do n't see them . They know you 're faking , and they 'll remember . 9 . There are only three real answers : yes , no and yes but later . 10 . People notice wrapping paper , not wrapping skills . 11 . You will never change anybody 's opinion about whether or not the bathwater is too hot or too cold . 12 . Go to bed . Go to bed . I know it 's only 10:30 p.m. , but go to bed ! 13 . No tattoos on the neck . On you or anyone else . Oprah.com : 20 questions that could change your life . 14 . Moms like scented candles . It 's not a crime to give them one every month . 15 . If you tell somebody to go away , they will hang around . 16 . Nonstop flights are worth the extra money . 17 . If you see lilacs or water balloons in April , you absolutely must buy them . Due to their short lifespan in water ( lilacs ) and the fact that all stores now sell summer novelty items in spring so that they can sell Halloween stuff in summer ( water balloons ) , you only have five smoking-hot seconds to purchase either item for other peopleâ€ ” and cause them to fall down in a shuddering fit of joy . And yes , adults do , too , love water balloons . 18 . Lifting your tongue to the roof of your mouth while taking a photo helps smooth out a double chin . 19 . Books . Books . More Books . 20 . Men who do n't put their face in the water are men you may not date or marry . You can swim or not swim , but you ca n't half-swim . That is like half-walking , half-thinking or half-falling in love . The guy has to put his face in the water , even if it 's cold and dark . Oprah.com : 11 things that are better when not perfect . 21 . The five-second food-on-the-floor rule is really the 30-second food-on-the-floor rule . Except in houses with dogs . 22 . There is a color you love that does NOT look good on you . Stop wearing it ! ( This rule is also known as : Do n't wear green , Leigh . ) 23 . Parents love the friend who offers to hold their baby so they can drink a beer . 24 . Whispering makes children do just about anything . Which is important to remember when you 're about to yell . Oprah.com : 20 things everyone should master by age 40 . 25 . There is only one clothing size . Yours . Baggy stuff makes you feel thin but look fat . Tight stuff is just plain painful . 26 . You do not like fried clams or salt water taffy . You like the romance of the boardwalk . You do n't have to eat food that will make you feel ill on the roller coaster just to revel in the seaside atmosphere . 27 . Take the stairs . Except if you 're on your way to a date or an interview . 28 . You will never run out of ideasâ€ ” or love . So put them out there in the world . You 'll have plenty more tomorrow . Oprah.com : 5 pieces of advice everyone ignores ( but should n't ) Subscribe to O , The Oprah Magazine for up to 75 % off the newsstand price . That 's like getting 18 issues FREE . Subscribe now ! TM & © 2011 Harpo Productions , Inc. All Rights Reserved .
After age 35 , columnist Leigh Newman believes leggings are not pants . Says Newman : Moms like scented candles , bathwater temperature is non negotiable . Do n't be afraid to put love or your ideas out in the world .