( CNN ) -- Even after she was cleared of murder , even after returning home to a scenic haven in Seattle , Amanda Knox is crippled with fear . The case that kept her behind bars for four years and hurled her into global notoriety is n't over . At any point , the United States could extradite her back to Italy to face a retrial since her acquittal was overturned in March . During one of her very first interviews as a free woman , Knox tells CNN 's Chris Cuomo that her attempt at resuming a normal life has been punctuated by debilitating panic attacks . Knox : ' I 'm afraid to go back ' to Italy . Admittedly nervous during the interview , she describes one such episode from the past weekend : `` I sit in my hotel room and cry so loud until the security calls the room , because the person next door has heard me crying , '' Knox says , her voice cracking . As she tries to articulate her next thought , Knox suppresses more tears . `` It 's really hard for me to talk to people about it . It 's like as soon as I allow myself to cry , I ca n't stop . '' The sweeping interview reveals fascinating new details of a story that has been widely reported -- but not in her words . She slams accusations from authorities that she 's an apathetic sexual deviant whose behavior led to her roommate 's gruesome death . Was she convicted on a story based partly on a gender stereotype ? Or is that just an excuse ? The subtleties in her interview may uncover some answers . Read an excerpt from Knox 's book . Going back to Italy . Knox says she 's afraid to return to Italy to face a new trial almost six years after her roommate 's death . But she 's considering it . `` I do n't know yet . It 's a really complicated question , '' she tells Cuomo . I mean , I 'm afraid to go back there . I do n't want to go back into prison . '' `` I 've been told that in Italy , people think it 's arrogant of me to sit here in the United States and have a book come out and defend myself , '' says Knox , who reportedly was paid a $ 3.8 million advance for her memoir , `` Waiting to be Heard . '' `` First of all , I find that incredibly unfair , because I have the right to defend myself . And no one can ask me to just shut up because it 's convenient . But at the same time , I want to prove to them that I care about what 's going on . '' Knox has been criticized for what some perceived as apathy over the death of her study-abroad roommate , Meredith Kercher , in 2007 . Kercher , a 21-year-old British exchange student , was found dead , seminaked with her throat slashed , in the Perugia villa she rented with Knox . But Knox says she 's been unfairly characterized as cold and aloof after Kercher 's death . `` I find it incredible that despite an absolute lack of evidence that connects me to this murder , I am still being judged based upon unrealistic and unreasonable expectations about how a young woman would react to a horrible situation . No one knows how they would react to a horrible situation until it happens to them , '' she says . `` I definitely reacted to what happened to her . And I react to this day . I 'm emotional to this day about what happened . But I 'm also the type of person who , when there is pressure on me and expectation on me to react , to feel in front of people , I freeze . I would much rather suppress my emotion than have it be determined as insincere and affected . '' Knox and her ex-boyfriend Raffaele Sollecito were convicted of killing Kercher . Both were acquitted in 2011 , but their acquittals were overturned in March . `` As I was going through all of this , when I cried , it was bad . When I did n't cry , it was bad . When I smiled , it was bad . When I did n't smile , it was bad , '' Knox says. `` ... I have been paralyzed by this kind of scrutiny . And I feel like it 's unfair . '' Will Knox be extradited to Italy ? Experts disagree on likelihood . Claims of sexual deviancy . At times , the depictions of Knox in court were as scandalous as plot lines in a made-for-TV movie . `` They were calling me things like violent and whore and deviant . And it 's all untrue , '' Knox tells Cuomo . Prosecutors theorized she was involved in some sort of erotic game gone horribly wrong that resulted in the death of her roommate . Knox says such claims were `` a bombardment of falsehood and fantasy . '' `` No one has ever claimed that I was ever taking part in deviant sexual activity . None of my roommates , none of my friends , none of the people who knew me there . This is simply coming out of the prosecution , '' she says . `` I was not strapping on leather and bearing a whip . I have never done that . I have never taken part in an orgy . Ever . '' She says there has been recent discussion `` about how our society latches onto the idea of a violent , sexual woman , how sexuality becomes deviancy , becomes violent '' and how `` the connection between those things is so easily made in comparison to men . '' `` I was completely recharacterized as a human being based upon the fact that I was sexually active . And that turned into sexual deviancy . And it was unfair , '' Knox says . `` And I was having to go into the courtroom when the jury and judge were already convinced of a certain idea of what kind of person I was . And there was nothing I could do to respond to it . '' Opinion : What Knox can and ca n't tell us . Implicating an innocent man . Even though she was acquitted of the murder charge , Knox does n't have a spotless record . After she and Sollecito were detained for questioning in the killing , she allegedly confessed to being at her home when Kercher was killed and implicated Patrick Lumumba , the owner of a bar where she worked . Lumumba was detained but was released after two weeks when his alibi was corroborated : He had spent the night of the murder talking to a customer in his pub in Perugia , police said . Lumumba later sued Knox for libel , winning 40,000 euros ( $ 54,000 ) in damages . Knox says her book gives readers insight into what she was thinking in the days and months after Kercher 's death . `` I 'm aware of the fact that people do n't seem to get where I 'm coming from when I named Patrick Lumumba , for instance . And I ca n't excuse it . But I can try to explain it . And that 's the only -- the only thing I can do , '' Knox says . Analysis : Knox case is complicated , confusing mess . Her life today . Despite the panic attacks , Knox is trying to get her life back to normal . She 's back with a boyfriend whom she knew before she was in Italy . She 's going to school and is making up lost time with her family . But she still has n't reached out to Meredith Kercher 's family . Why ? `` I know that they think that I 'm guilty , '' Knox tells Cuomo . `` ... I wish that I had gotten ahold of them much earlier , at the very beginning . '' During the interview , Knox 's hands appeared to show signs of injuries . She says she was taking self-defense training . `` I 've received death threats since I 've been home . And I do n't ever want to be caught in a situation that Meredith was caught in where someone is able to overpower me because I just do n't know what to do , '' Knox says . `` There are not normal people who are fixated on me . And I do n't know what they 're capable of . I do n't . '' Her desire , Knox says , is that within five years she will finally feel at ease . `` I hope that I will be definitively found innocent , '' she says . `` I hope that I can reconcile myself with Patrick and Meredith 's family . '' She worries about a lifetime of answering questions from doubters . `` I really want this to be behind me . I need this . I do n't know how long I can hold it together . I do n't know how long I can defend myself . '' Timeline : Kercher murder case . CNN 's Richard Allen Greene contributed to this report .
Knox says she 's considering going back to Italy but fears returning to prison . An Italian court has overturned her acquittal , but Knox maintains her innocence . She slams prosecutors ' claims that she is a sexual deviant . Knox says she is studying self-defense after death threats .