( CNN ) I hate the term `` age appropriate . '' At 53 I will dress as I like , thank you . So , please , fashion mags , clothing stores and Hollywood , stop with the `` how to dress in your 20s , 30s , 40s and beyond '' nonsense . J.Crew is the latest to inform me , that at my advanced age , short shorts are not for me . ( And I thought legs were the last to go . ) I love J.Crew . I shop there all the time precisely because they sell clothes I want to wear . Now I have to shop there knowing I dare not go near certain clothes because , well , this is how a very attractive , older J.Crew lady put it : `` In my 20 's , I wore rollneck sweaters with short shorts . A lot has changed since then . Some 20-plus years later , I still love J.Crew , just ... differently . '' I never realized . But , then again , J.Crew is n't alone when it comes to schooling older ladies on what they should or should n't bare . Oprah.com , way back in 2010 , helpfully pointed out `` women of a certain age '' should NEVER wear mini-skirts with Uggs , never expose their stomach , never , never wear tube tops , absolutely no shredded denim and , for goodness sakes , no neon nail polish because `` as you age , skin gets more sallow . '' Thanks Adam Glassman ! Guess I 'll cross Uggs off the list ! I am still a tad confused , though , by a People magazine spread a few months back that featured `` sexy grandmas ! '' ( yes , there was an exclamation point ! ) It featured a 68-year-old Goldie Hawn exposing her cleavage . Does that mean I can expose my grandchildren to my two best friends , but not my thighs ? Perhaps this trend started with the best of intentions . But after having total strangers instruct me through the years to dress sexy , not slutty , in my 20s , to avoid mom-jeans in my 30s , to find a `` signature look '' in my 40s and to throw out my Uggs in my 50s -- I am done ! And while I 'm at it , I 'm done with the `` she looks great -- and holy sh -- , she 's 45 ! '' Jennifer Lopez is 45 , but she looked beautiful at the Oscars Sunday night ... period . No age qualifier necessary . And , guess what ? Her gown , with the deep , plunging neckline was awesomely appropriate even if it would never be included in the `` beyond '' category . Recently I had a conversation with a young male friend who was lambasting a `` nearly 60-year-old '' Madonna for exposing her bare rear end at the Grammys . `` Do n't worry , '' I said . `` That was n't for you . '' Madonna was simply doing what she 's always done -- sending a message to women that it 's okay to express your sexuality . I do n't think I convinced him . But , that 's okay . I have my own opinions . And that includes looking in the mirror and thinking , damn , I look great in these short shorts .
Elvis Costello : J.Crew ad ##ores older women to wear ' age - appropriate ' clothes . Spare me . She says women like J . Lo , they do n't apologize for dressing how they do and the music great . She says she 's through with having total strangers tell her what 's OK for a woman of her age to wear .