Welcome to the Glenn McIntosh show. I'm Glenn Macintosh author YouTuber developer transformational online programs. You can do all over the world and psychologists who is super passionate about eating physical activity Weight and Body Image, please join me for inspiring conversations with world leaders as they share innovative ideas based on the latest scientific evidence.And they're rich personal experiences. We dive deep exploring all of the subtleties. So you understand exactly how to make peace with food find joy and moving your body Embrace a positive body image and generally just kill it at life. You'll also hear some podcast of all parts of my Q&A video series Thursday therapy and a bunch of other cool stuff. I know you'll love whether you're tuning in for yourself.Your health professional looking to better support those you serve welcome to the Glenn McIntosh show. This episode is brought to you by the psychology of eating movement Weight and Body Image support group on Facebook. The rather long name represents the diversity of Interest the people in the group have some people are really interested in the psychology of eating others want to develop a better relationship with physical movement many people, especially when they first join up a really concerned about their weight and almost everyone is on the path to Feeling more loving and accepting towards their bodies, which is what we're talking about in the episode today in the podcast. We talked about the importance of getting support as you improve your relationship with your body. So if you feel like you'd benefit from some support that will nurture you without judging head on over to www.facebook.com / groups / a weight management psychology. There are thousands of members in the group who are already taking the journey and we would love you to join us. It's a group for you your family and friends and health professionals who support people from a non diet framework. So join us today, and we will look forward to sharing support with you. It's Facebook forward slash groups forward slash weight management psychology or just look up the Ecology of eating movement white and Body Image support group on Facebook Welcome back to the podcast. It's so wonderful that we've gotten off to such a great start. I love seeing all of your ratings and reviews. So, please keep them coming and we're on all of the major platforms. So wherever you listening click subscribe, so you never miss out on any of the great stuff that we have to come. Today's episode features. Probably the biggest name in body image today the powerful vulnerable sparkly. That is time from fit last episode. I was a bit nervous because it was my first podcast this time. I was nervous because I was talking to Taryn Brom fit. It was actually the first time I ever met Taryn but as you'll hear we kind of become mates throughout the podcast as we have this really special conversation, and I know you'll love it as much as I did. The podcast is broken up into three parts because we videoed at all and our video recorder only goes up to half an hour. Plus I had so many things. I knew you guys would be interested in hearing from Turin that I wanted to break it up into bite-size chunks and keep it all sort of logically flowing for you. If you do want to check out the vids. They're linked on this podcast page. Www.ynmachinery.com ology.com . A you forward slash tar and Brum fit that's ta Ry n BR U MF. I TT. So without further Ado, please join me for an elevated conversation with the one and only tar and bump it. Welcome to the Glenn McIntosh show where we talk everything psychology of eating physical movement Weight and Body Image and speaking of body image. We have the one the only tar and bump it now turn is a best-selling author and director of the social change documentary Embrace. If you haven't seen it, you need to see it. Honestly when I'm doing body image work, it does half my therapy. for me taryn's Global Crusades and body dissatisfaction it seen her recognized by the United Nations women Amy Poehler's SMART Girls and the Geena Davis Institute, whether it's motivating the next generation at Google HQ or becoming General Electric's highest-rated speaker turns determination to shift the way the world thinks about themselves and their bodies has the support of high-profile personalities like Rosie O'Donnell no, Ricky Lake and Ashton Kutcher named alongside Beyonce and Emma Watson in Bridget's magazines woman of the year turns powerful message has reached over 100 million people by the likes of the Washington Post the doctors Good Morning America and the Today Show tone lives in Adelaide with her husband, Matthew three children one dog one turtle and Ten fish and you can find out all about this if you follow terrans Instagram account, its body image movement Tyrant. I love your Instagram account. It is one of the few that every time you have a post I Look to it. So guys, if you want to do yourselves a favor check out terrans Instagram, it's so warm such great messages on there, but it's a lot of fun. So without further Ado Taryn, thank you so much for being with us. Aw. Thanks for having me making me quite new. This would be true. Well, that's okay because we are really nervous to have you well and you know the turtle eight three fish. So I need to update that there's only seven lifts. It's so interesting. You should say that because I was actually thinking I wonder in my family if we could actually keep a like a tally on our fish. I know that we had some guinea pigs and Mum left my twin brother alone with both of them. And so that's a good thing. It wasn't so good. But anyway, we're not here to talk about that. We've just put back my therapy a couple of years. What we are here to talk about is body image and honestly Tower and I can't think of a better person to talk about than this the new so we're going to spend some time and we're going to talk about terrans personal Journey because you've got a really powerful personal story. Now, you can see a lot about that in embrace the documentary Read a lot about it in embrace yourself your new book, but I think it's important that we talk about it. Then what we're going to do is terrans agreed to spend some time with us and really look at some of the how to's of a positive body image. I think that due to the work of Turin and some other wonderful body positive Advocates people are ready to become body positive. It's something we're becoming familiar with but then we have to ask that question of well, how do I actually do it and tyrants? Work it has some great how to's that I really want to take you guys through. Of course, you know, my my guys are really interested in weight. A lot of the guys. I work with live in larger body. So so we're going to talk about how does body positivity kind of relate to eating and physical activity and your weight because I think it's a lot of barriers around weight and becoming body positive. And then we might finish up with Tara new through your work of just been exposed to all of these amazing body positive advocate. So we might let people know how they can join this community and get the benefits from that and what are some kind of next steps for sure. Sounds like a plan. Yeah. So alright let's let's get into it. We'll start off with the documentary. So like I said guys if you haven't watched this documentary you really have to so Tyrant for me. If I'm doing safe, I'm doing intuitive eating work with people. One of the first go to S is I recommend Rick course means book. If not dieting then what or our friend Linda Bacon's book Health at every size. And then if I'm doing Bodywork image work with any of my clients, you are one of the to go twos. So the first thing I do is I ask people to do like a social media declutter get rid of all the stuff that makes them feel kind of less than or like they need to change their their bodies or all those thin ideal images and then I just asked him to go and see Embrace. Nice. Thank you. My favorite stat on Embrace, which I actually read in your book is that 52,000 people watch this in one night in Germany Mmm Yeah, it was quite unreal actually because I don't think anyone saw that coming. We released it in cinema. We were up against not that I even knew this the time I just People to come and watch Embrace in Germany, but on that same night King Arthur was releasing King Arthur to and Guardians of the Galaxy and sure enough in Grace went number one at the box office. Absolutely mental, isn't it? He's but you know what? It says. I think it just says that we are also ready to come together to talk about how we felt and look at Solutions and how we can move forward because we're just kind of done with hating our bodies and 52,000 people. Owing to see Embrace and start afresh conversation. That was what that was. The world is really ready for it. And that's what I see Embrace as I see it as a turning point in the way that we talk and think and feel and act and interact around our bodies. Yeah. It's a it's a it's a conversation starter and I think because of the characters in Embrace who are so open and so vulnerable with their own stories it gives Mission for other people to feel the same and share their stories. And and I think that's it's a question that comes up for me a lot in the media is how I feel about the mission of creating Global change. And you know, do you think that that can be done like doesn't that make you feel stressed and I'm like you maybe it does why I asked me this question about but you know, what what I know is from traveling to many many countries around the world and speaking to hundreds of thousands of people is that we mostly feel the same. Same way we don't want to be at war with our body anymore. We don't want to see the some of the things that we see the women being objectified young girls being sexualized. We don't want to be preyed upon, you know, the weight loss industry cosmetic industry the diet industry. There's a lot of stuff that's going on that just doesn't feel good. And we want an alternative. So and I think speaking as a health professional when you say that I think even Health black health professional, sometimes you could point the finger at us as Bias and stigma and discrimination around bodies, especially people who live in larger bodies, but I think when I talk to health professionals, I think we're ready for it. I think so too. Yeah this came up in a recent conversation. Just going how are we all going to change the world? I'm like, I just think we're almost ready because you're right more and more health professionals are talking about health at every size. That would have been very very radical 10 years ago very but now this Is this is part of the conversation and people are starting to get a little bit curious in the health industry and I think that's really exciting. Absolutely exciting. Absolutely exciting and but this all started Taryn with you and your personal experience. It's just amazing that this whole Global change started with you. Yes. When did you first realize that being thin and being really fit looking wasn't? Golden ticket to health and happiness and success. Mmm. So for those people who are listening who don't know my story. Basically I hated my body and I wanted to have the perfect bikini body. So I set out on a mission to lose the weight and tone up and in 15 weeks lost 15 kilos and and I got there I got I got into a bikini, which I hadn't done ever in my entire life. And it was in the moment that I was I actually entered a bodybuilding competition like a fitness competition never say never let me just say that it's because like wildfire to do goodness. Are you serious? No walking on a stage and like a teeny tiny bikini, you know in high heels in front of 900 people. No not my thing. But anyway Never Say Never that walking across that stage. I realized that to have the body to have Perfect. Bikini body was such a battle for me. It took so much Obsession about food and cutting food up and putting it into tiny plastic containers like that's empowering and feel because good. It doesn't because you talk about that in your book. It's like you were trying to pretend like all of that food prep was farm and eating that very kind of limited bland food was fun. Nice sauce. Seriously. What is food without Source? Give me some sauce. Yeah, and I think just the Russian about what was going into my body what I weighed on the scales, it was just it was no life. It was not sustainable. It actually having that bikini body made me miserable and the Really the opposite of the thin ideal. Yeah. I was really surprised to get there and go. Oh no, I want to go back. So it surprise you. Yeah, of course it did. I thought I would be it would make me really happy, you know to have that body that I dreamed about and I'd seen in magazines and on billboards and on TV. I got there and I wasn't happy and then you did something really interesting. You posted a very different kind of before and after shot. So tell us about that. Well before photos you always see a woman before and she's really sad and overweight and then she loses weight and miraculously she becomes happy and that's not the get it that's right. I'm very very tan. It's just not the case. So I swapped mine around the before was on. Age in that perfect bikini body the after was naked but you couldn't see anything but you could certainly see the roles in the folds and the rest and yeah, I posted it on social media and it went crazy. It went absolutely nuts. Didn't it? It was headline news everywhere, you know in France in Germany in the u.s. In Japan it everywhere. I mean it was on the in-flight news on contest which I think is hilarious afraid of my go-to for fighting. In flight and use them like wow pretty much naked. This is that's right. It is really broken people's brains has it. I mean even that this is how ludicrous the fact that it went viral, which I'm really grateful for now because it's given me a platform to speak about this and and help people but how crazy to think that her a reverse before and after photograph a woman loving her body after is somehow headline news. Well, that's the seems the ludicrous thing because you look at that photo and we will post a link to that photo. I'm sure you can see it on your Website probably yeah, we'll post a link to the photo. But you just look I supposed to me like just a normal person and I think for me that's why this message is so important because the world's brains just kind of went into a tears because he was a normal-looking person who didn't hate her body and that was so unusual and so hard for people to kind of comprehend. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. I'm the only way I can describe it. Is that it broke? People's brains it really break people's Brian's Like Houses normal person. Yeah, because you know, we were talking about this before that in Psychology psychologists talk about a normative discontent with the way that you look which means it's you know, it actually doesn't really matter what shape or size we are. We don't like our bodies, you know, we're sitting here in what is my office most of the time and I see people who live in really really large bodies maybe a couple hundred three kilos or more who don't like them and then I see people who live in bodies that are 42 kilos and don't like them. It's a real myth that you have to you know becoming thin. He's the way to feel good about yourself. Yeah, and it's such a shame because there's so many wasted lives people are wasting so much time battling against their own Miracle, you know, the body is a miracle with the things that our bodies, you know can do It's a little bit sad, but you know what now, we're having these conversations and now there is an alternative and we have a choice and I think that's what people are learning is like. Oh, I don't have to hate my body and feel this crap. I can learn to love and embrace it no matter what it looks like and that's a really really powerful message isn't it tiring because we kind of I think that for a lot of people and you know, I'm a psychologist. I work in body image eating wait movement. And I think that people actually a lot of people they'd love to love their bodies more but they actually don't think that it's achievable and and what you're showing people women especially is that it's doable. So tell us about you know, that the documentary is called embrace. The book is embrace yourself. What does embrace mean to you? Because I read in your book you kind. Describe it like getting a Golden Ticket To Life. Yeah, I mean that's that's one way I describe it because it does it just feels so Free I think that's the word really just free and joyous. I feel really liberated life just feels extra sparkly and fun and I just feel light just like just yeah it did and people often ask me like, where do you get all your energy from and I'm and I didn't used to have this much energy, but it's because you know, all of that body hating and all those conversations that used to fill up my head. They're just no longer there because it's Time-consuming isn't it so much energy. So many thoughts so many emotions people are fighting against when they're fighting the body that they're living in. Yeah, it's hard work hating your body and I think you know when we talk about change and wanting to you know people out there who want to change but don't know how to change. I think there's a lot of fear around that will I ever be able to embrace, you know, this is a question will I ever be able to love my body and I think what's really important and what's happening and has Happening over the last few years is more and more people are telling their stories and that's really inspiring. It's nice to know that you're not alone and that before and after photographs. I received seven thousand emails. So you don't email that's a lot of emails to know. Someone says the other day like in växjö like got 50 miles might try 7,000 who runs the office and probably deals with how many would you deal with a couple hundred a day at least? It's like wow 7,000 that's a that's another level above. It was a lie. But you know what it said was we all have stories no matter who we are no matter what everybody's look like no matter what size they are and a lot of us have been struggling behind closed doors about how we feel about our bodies, but and I'm really grateful for social media that it's enabled us to connect with strangers around the world and share. This is important to talk about it. It's absolutely powerful because we sort of I suppose that you know, we live in a society where it's it's not so friendly to people who don't look like that perfect thin ideal and it's also important for people to connect with like a subculture. It's growing that kind of Embraces the fact that we don't all look the same and we're not all supposed to look the same. That's right. And I always talk about the the row of babies a friend of mine. Dr. Emma Johnson talks about this that if we lined up a row of six month old babies like here Yes, because we really know I said that but look at the diversity and all those babies, you know, some of these little chunky thighs that you just love and want to squeegee and you know, some odd sort of you know, smaller summer largest. I'm a Browns and blacks and white all this Rich diversity what happens when we grow up that what we have to all conform to the same. Yeah, you know, look at that diversity then it doesn't change what we need to is that yeah, and that's kind of what we need to be seeing then like you say in social media. It's so good for people to be seeing and if you look at the people that you recommend that people connect with in the book what you're seeing is a diversity of shapes and sizes just like we see in real life absolutely and attitudes towards their bodies. Like I love my social media feed. I love my Instagram of the people that I follow because I never know what I'm going to get. Yeah, and it's exciting to see you nobody posi Panda over in the UK posting a jiggle dance that she does like it just brings joy to my life, you know, and I guess that's why I have such a Positive relationship with social media because like what you were saying earlier about declutter be cluttering it up decluttering or spring cleaning. I love that. So we encourage people to follow unfollow. Who are you going to unfollow who can you follow and it's amazing how many people allow toxic messages and toxic people and ideals into their life and they think it's okay because it's on their phone you would never let that happen in real life. You'd never let a friend into your circle your girl gang. Yeah, your boy game whose mean and nasty but at all says things that doesn't feel good or does it serve you? Yes, so why do we allow this on our fights? Yeah. It's an amazing thing. Isn't it that we sort of we're so used to the media and now social media sending us these messages that are really toxic and harmful that sometimes we just kind of brush it off Mmm Yeah. So who are give it to us then Tyrant who are some people That that of people that we should follow in the body positive space because what I've done is I'm almost finished your book. I have just gone through your book and in the book one of the things I love is you actually have like a little mini chapters from some of these people that are just beautiful. Yeah, and I think that you know body positivity is kind of like learning a new language you need different teachers you need waves of similar information said in lots of different ways, and that's part of why I think that Looks so great. But I've just literally gone through a just followed everyone on their I knew quite a few of them. Yeah. Sure Louise green who's in there. She actually was the first person on the Glenn Macintosh show amazing. I think I did see that somewhere that you had connected with it. Yeah, so she's great. We met in Vancouver a few years ago. Just amazing. I just love what she brings to this space. So yeah. Look Louise green body posi Panda, Jade Bill Renee. Aria style me Sunday. Michaela's skill knee. There's a small handful. There's a few for you and we will provide some links to those guys so you can get all connected and join that Community. Yeah. Well Tyrant, thank you so much for talking about your personal journey, and we know that the world is ready for it. And I just think it's it's absolutely amazing that from your personal Journey you've sparked this Worldwide change now. I know that that everyone listening is going to want this golden ticket. So let's get on to some of the the how-to's and some of the barriers that people are going to face in this journey to really authentically embracing I'm so excited to have this conversation with you because I think that the world is ready to become body positive but psychologists we often believe that the most powerful question is how the in the Freudian days we used to think why was a really important questions. Like why am I this way but psychologist would tend to be more focused on Solutions these days so I think the most powerful question is, how do I actually change? And I think as well as all of your public work, you've had a personal experience with this you've gotten through to the other side yourself and your book is really a how to that's what I love about that. It's nearby I've got the idea. I know why but how do I actually do it a big thing for me that comes out in all of your work is your level of self expression like you Are a very self-express person and I even find that I would consider myself generally pretty self-expressed. But I think as I've gotten a little bit older maybe gotten some negative feedback at times. I mean, I have like a public sort of space now as a professional I kind of sometimes shrink back into myself. Oh, please stop don't do that Glenn. Well, that's a crime. I actually I'm you helping me realize this remember it And I find myself asking what would tar and do well nice my favorite example of this and this is just a really weird little situation was you might remember a few weeks ago. I posted on my Instagram I was getting up and I was going to the gym and it was really early and I've got this ridiculous kind of like tiger stripe dressing gown. My hair was all messy. And I thought this is a good message to share with people. Sometimes it's important to get up. Even if it's early even if you don't want to go and move your body and I found myself debating whether I should post it or not because I looked like rubbish. I decided what would tire. And do I had you a little missy be right inside my head and I posted it and the first person to get back to me was you saying Glenn? I look like that in the morning. Yeah. It's like fellow Superior that you and I both do more than our fair share of lipid. Tell me why it's so important for us to be self-expressed. Well, I think the opposite of eat is living by rules because that's what we're defining when you think oh I shouldn't do this because I'm a professional now and I have a public personality and by saying no, I won't express myself in these ways, whatever they mean to you, whether it's wearing a crazy suit or colorful clothes or leopard print or wearing your hair in pigtails. Whatever it is. He free my Instagram I have doing that then then you are just you're playing by someone else's rules and who says how you should behave you are free to express yourself. Just like I am like, you know, I bought my crimper a long post to to Brisbane crimping my hair or putting blue eyeliner on or wearing the clothes. I want to wear there is such a sense of freedom and joy that it brings me. Do those things doesn't mean it has to be always loud and crazy. It's just how I feel. Yeah. It's that whole conversation around even just make up with women going. Well you wear makeup and I'm like, yeah sometimes I do but sometimes I don't and I just don't play by anyone's rules. So I've booked on a red carpet before in La no makeup just because I didn't feel like wearing makeup. So why should I conform to someone's Rules by saying I have to wear makeup to go on a red carpet. Carpet so didn't on that occasion, but I've been to the shops before and I've done a bit of orange lipstick. I mean, she's that's what you want to do correct at the time. Absolutely and I reckon if we can just tap into that a little bit more. There's there's a real sense of joy and freedom in doing that. It might be I had someone say to me once I changed the color of my bedspread. It's been brown and beige forever and I think was the blue eyeliner and she thought well if you can wear blue eyeliner like it from the 80s, I'm going I used by been sprayed. It has like go you like amazing. And now she's done that one little thing. Now. She's curious what other ways am I stopping myself from being authentically me in life. And how do I express myself that feels good because you talk about it in your book too that we get, you know before breakfast hundreds of messages telling us what we should do what we shouldn't do and I'll leave it for people to read the book but there are so many messages that we get to behave in a Certain way yeah, that's right. And I guess no one has that right to tell me how to live my life or what close to where it's like when fashion designers are on TV saying this season, you know the must wear or what you should have in your wardrobe. It's like why are you telling me what I should have in my wardrobe? We are not sheep, you know, we should never be following we should just do what feels good for us. And that for me really is the is living. It's really the one The biggest embraced philosophies and that's a great take-home message. If you're ever struggling kind of forget the rules. Yeah and just listen to yourself because it can get a bit confusing for people Carnot. Like I know you had a kind of like a an argument with somebody who said that you weren't embracing because you wax your legs. Well, she assumed I reckon she's huge. I'm sure that were here when she said that but some yeah, I had a I had a q a screening of embrace and this woman was so angry. Angry, and she just she had so much venom in her and it was quite embarrassing in fact because it was it was you know, 300 audience, you know filled with people who just seen Embrace and we're all in this happiest face except for one person was there's always someone just so bright but still the yeah sure. She just couldn't get the message of embrace that it means you can wear makeup or you don't wear makeup. You can do your hair not wear your hair. You can wear what you like. It's like surgery, you know, I just think that we live in a world that judge. People so harshly and we just it sounds we were simply we need to love more and just judge less and judging just doesn't feel it. Just doesn't feel good. You know, when you said comments about other people, I don't haven't done it for years as in like that's just not part of Who I Am anymore, but I remember when I hated my body the amount of times I would say to my girlfriend say down at the beach. I'd be justifying my own body. Like I look at her body. I bet she hasn't had three kids in 3D. A half years so you go judging completely to try and make myself almost feel better. What you're saying is it didn't work. Of course. It didn't work. It doesn't feel nice. Yeah, and that's a wonderful message because I think there are I feel like sometimes in the body positive movement where you run a risk of replacing old diet culture rules with new body positive rules that now everyone has to adhere to and that kind of almost It's probably better but it limits your self-expression in just a different way. Absolutely and I think this is one of the reasons why in the book I asked a bunch of different contributors to write a few words and a few of those people in the body image a positive body image space have different views and opinions from one another and I think that's a beautiful thing because we're all so we're all so different and you can learn many things from many different people I spoke about About Lorna Jane and my book, you know that that was quite controversial right where I had a photograph taken with her and a lot of people in my community really upset with me for doing that. But I had to explain to them to say we can talk amongst ourselves about these issues and we're probably not going to get anywhere the real work out and the real way forward is talking to people with different opinions from ours and allowing that space to open up and that dialogue to learn from One another there are no rules. So right tone it be you know, as a psychologist. We know that people don't necessarily respond very well when they feel threatened when they feel judged so conversation if you like some people in the fat activism movement would do it point the finger at Lorna Jane and say you're wrong. Yeah. It's probably not going to change that much. No doesn't mean you doesn't mean that you can't say you know what Lorna? I don't like Like the fact that you talked about inclusivity and diversity and you don't show it that's a bit annoying you can have that dialogue. It doesn't have to turn into a shit fight. If you'd be respectful dialogue course, it can be and you can learn from one another. Well don't you know it even comes down to like, I really appreciate you coming to talk to me today. There are a lot of people in the body positive movement in the health at every size community that would criticize and I totally understand their opinion my work on Biggest Loser hmm. You know, I had some reasons for going on there and I feel like we were able to share an introduction to somebody positive messages to a community. There's never heard them right or wrong. I you know, I appreciate you coming not saying no Glenn has done this work and and I'm learning from you already today. I did a talk at dietitians unite which is the big dietitians day run by dietitian connection and And that's what I spoke about their the you know the need for especially with health professionals but to move from competing to collaboration, I think in my words, that's what you're talking about is about judging less and loving more. Yeah, absolutely and look. I think if you live your life like that where it's good or bad and it's black and white and you've done Biggest Loser and therefore you can't speak positively in the body. I mean, it's crazy to even think like that's not the world we live in Ask for human beings are so incredibly complex. I feel like sometimes you know, I think I read about it in the book about the being a walking contradiction about yeah, I'm moving my body for pleasure and yet I'll go and run a marathon or I'll go and run and that's not my favorite thing to do, but I can that's still okay. It still works for me. Yeah, because the blanket rules and absolutism doesn't make room for the nuances and the complexities and that is one of the things I love you sharing in your Book, you know you're you're talking about the principles of intuitive eating body positivity and enjoyable movement. And then you're also sharing your real personal experience which helps people understand the nuances just because you do enjoyable movement doesn't mean that a times you don't smash yourself. Yeah, correct. That's right. Just love those. I love what you just said about the nuances. Yeah, because when I talk about the complexity of the human being it is those that all it is those little nuances that make us us and I That's why we just need to share all of our opinions and I think take what we want to take from some people and take things from other people and it doesn't have to be it's not a one-size-fits-all and of course it changes yet does people in it at different times? And I think it's interesting we sometimes and we see this in Psychology we get in camps you do this. I do this and the funny thing is we have these these leaders of the camps that are like, this is the only way they're often quite adversarial towards the other camp. Herbs, and then you get all of these Health practitioners who just do a bit of this exactly like you said and a bit of that and of course our clients the all the people you're working with are the same. Absolutely. Yeah, but it makes sense. Right? I just makes it just makes sense. It just absolutely and it's so heartening to hear you say that and I'm a hundred percent sure that's part of the reason why the body image movement is gaining so much momentum because it is inclusive and you're ready to meet people and accept people where they are. And just have conversations and then yeah, we were talking about before about Linda bacon. I love that that Linda and I can have a warm friendly professional relationship and I agree with 90% of what Linda thinks and then I'd have said I'm like Linda that's why off. We should have done that and she agrees with a fair bit of what I say, but there's a few things. She's like Glenn you cannot do this and we just did that's okay we can have and I think us being able to have those types of conversations really leads to us actually learning because this body positive movement is its young. Hmm. And so we need to kind of co-create the best body positive movement that we that we can yeah, absolutely. So at the end of the day, I think a lot of this comes down to the individual and your book is really speaking to the individual something that I really love about it is you're encouraging people to be vulnerable. Tell me why that's such an important message because I feel like sometimes things are sold to us as like it's got to be simple. Just love your body, you know, just stop emotionally eating just get out there and go to the gym at it. It kind of disempowers us from creating. The real change because this is kind of I think you've had the ability to make such a heavy topic light and and still keep it real. But at the end of the day people if they want to develop a real authentic body positivity, it is work isn't it? Of course it is and I always say that speaking to audiences once they've seen him brace and I say don't expect to walk out those doors and be like, right. That's it. I now Embrace and you know, I want to run down the Straight naked I mean, I would love that. That'd be like Mike API how many nice people but it's it is we always hate this for you, but it's a journey it is a journey, right? It's just you don't just wake up one day and decide that's it. I embrace my body, but I tell you what, everyone can do in any given moment and that is make the commitment to embrace that anyone can do. So, what does that mean? The community it means to to get to it arrived at a point where you say what I've been experience. What I've been feeling about my body is not serving me. It doesn't feel great. I want to make a choice to do something different from what I've done. Yeah, so it all comes tension. Absolutely. So here I go and then we guess it's about exploring for yourself. What do you need to learn to love your body? Do you want to move? Your body in a way that feels more pleasurable as opposed to punishment movement is a big part of embrace for me because I think we've been given these bodies. We've been given them to move and enjoy these bodies of ours, you know, I talked about them being magical but they're here to enjoy these bodies. So is it movement is that eating more intuitively and more mindfully. Is it surrounding yourself with people who hold you up and make you feel good. There are practical things people can do like we talked about unfollow follow on social media, but I think it starts with a commitment. It's almost like a bit of an education. There is a thousand books out there to read I always get everyone to start with. Dr. Linda Bacon's Health at every size. Stop there. Just get curious about what's out there find your tribe. I really think that's a big part of it. The people are hanging out with these days so different from maybe 10 years ago. Gosh, I feel so loved and so And I think that's a really beautiful part of this as well is just real heartfelt connections with people that get it because it's not the reality is that we're social beings, you know, we live together. We eat together we sleep together we work together and it's not it's a nice idea that you can develop Acceptance in yourself, but it also does happen in the context of other people doesn't it? Absolutely and I think the storytelling is really important. Wouldn't it's really important to sit down with your girlfriends and create a space and say hey, I just want to talk about something that's really important to me and my my development as a human being. I've been really struggling with how I feel about my body share the stories and this is where I would like to go how do you guys feel everyone could do that? You can go to a party can go to a cafe. You can go to a friend's house and just sit down with a couple of people you trust and love that trust and love you and just open up. Dialogue and then at some stage it will tend to okay. This has been great, but I need some professional help. Yeah, and then you find you know, your people were talking earlier about doctors that aren't serving people that are saying, you know, really harmful and getting harmful messages across to the patient find a different doctor. I think we really need to just Empower ourselves to change the way that we've been doing things because change never happens if you just continue doing the same thing over and over again, right so Draw a line in the sand and map out a bit of a plan. Here's what I'm going to do. I love that making the commitment no matter where you are. You can make the commitment to embrace and I love that question. What do I for me as a unique individual? What do I need to embrace? I think that's a really powerful question that the people watching and listening can ask themselves and then surrounding yourself personally and professionally with people who are on the same page. Yeah, because It is you can't have health professionals or people supporting you that are coming from this old Paradigm. No, that's right. Yeah, you need everyone like you said people have different opinions and I talked about in my health professionals workshops is not everyone has to be on exactly the same page to support you, but we all have to be in the same book, correct. So for example, you know, we get a lot of dieticians who sort of follow a weight loss approach, but they like the ideas are body. Positivity and intuitive eating and enjoyable movement. What we find is that if people are still in that weight focussed Paradigm, we can't really work with them. Sure the clients just get confused. Of course, you're telling me not to focus on the scales, but then I come in there and they're weighing myself. So I suppose that's an important message for people to so fine your tribe of professionals, you know, if I had a dollar for every client who told me about a negative experience I had with their GP hmm then find another GP. Absolutely. And this is where we need to really Empower ourselves like the where the master like we're driving this ship This Is Us. That's our life. Right? So you're right because it's just like it's easy to say well other people are affecting me. Well, yeah, but what you're doing and there's a lot of in your book and in your message, there's a lot of personal responsibility. Absolutely. It's you then need to empower yourself to get the right tribe around you absolutely and I think we also need to remember that no one knows us like we know us no one knows me. Me or knows my needs it better on this planet than I do. And I think that's a connection that's developed for me personally over the last few years because I wasn't even connected to that person when I was hating my body so that that does take some time and I find that that happens through meditation or getting into nature. That's when I'm feeling really most connected. I think the other thing I want to remember to say is about when we talk about moving our bodies. Is is finding the sparkle, you know the magic I just I just love it when people have sort of got let me start again. People are busy. Right we use the b word so often fizzy fizzy fizzy real bloody busy busy busy people, but I don't want to sound too morbid Hoogland, but I have a saying and I think about it all the time and that is every breath that I take is one step closer to my last so you can spin that you really but it really it actually Really motivates me. Yeah, I think I like my God, you know, like how am I almost 41 because I still feel 20 and there's all these things I want to do. I think in in in our current situation in our lives, we've got to find the time for fun and to do activities that just give us joy that just reconnect us with our sense of adventure and look for me that just might be taking a taking a hike with my dog. In the sunshine and sometimes I see the world in his beautiful lens around like it's almost like I'm tripping not that I'd know what that's like, but you know, I'm looking at leaves going. Oh my gosh, the colors of those leaves on that tree is like magic and it's it's like a state of being that is you can't live like that all the time shit to do laundry to dip it down this people to visit see it like but I can create that space in my life. You just its moments and they're delicious. You have a name for these Of its Sparkle activities are cool activities. I certainly love that and I it's one of the things that you know, I think that your book is about body positivity, but this is really like for me reading it. You know, I'm a guy guys tend to have less body image issues and girls as you know, I've also done a bit of work on my body of it and been exposed to some great body positive advocate. So I have a pretty positive body image. I'm reading a lot of this and I'm thinking this is my clients. It's going to be so great for my clients and I it to this bit about being busy and too busy for these Sparkle activities. I'm like Tower Iran is therapize in me you're doing this is it's this is a it goes beyond body image and your book is is about that. It's about moving into just living a great life. You having fun? I think we I think we do take things way too. Seriously. Wait, she's just a bit of fun with this and I think the more that you just go others out there are no rules. I'm just going to live life, too. You like the way I want to yeah Adventure does find you too. It really does and sometimes I've heard you talk about this before sometimes it's like really big things. Yeah. I'm going to go overseas. I'm going to buy this really expensive dress or and sometimes it's the smallest thing. I'm going to pick a flower. Yes. I do. You know, I'm glad you said that because I was walking the other day and there was these roses like bouncing over this fence. And I actually I had such a Google to myself. Because I stopped to smell the rose and I'm like, I've literally human being like today. I've stopped the metaphors based on I've literally got it's about the road. You're right, but it was just like such a small little moment. I'm like, wow how simple is that? And so often these activities that I talked about they are free and I'm a big fan of nature we have access to all these radicals. Awesome things to do like climbing a mountain or go for a walk on the beach or just take your shoes off and just walk on grass in a park. Like, oh gosh that feels delicious sitting under a tree. I'll often pull my beanbag out from home put it in back of my car go to a park and put my beanbag under a tree just lie there reading a book It Feels Like Heaven. Yeah. Anyone can do it anytime it's free. It's free. Yeah. I absolutely love that. So look to some beautiful take-home messages, and we're going to post This on our social media. So what we want to hear is we want to hear your sparkle activities. Okay, everyone. We want to hear what your sparkle activities are post them in the comments because like Karen said, you're not too busy. I'm here talking to Tyrone drum fit the things that she does in a day a week a year would almost literally blow your mind. If she can do it we can do it. I can't wait to read them. I'm going to Stalk all of you. Listen, I didn't read all your keys. And you know what you see in the comments is everyone's idea of what a sparkle activity might be theirs. So rich and diverse. Yeah, it doesn't it doesn't have to be big and loud. It could be my goodness learning how to knit. I remember meeting was of your book if it needed. Yeah, fantastic. Love it. Love it. Well, okay some take-home messages from this I'm getting Be yourself. Forget the rules just be yourself take the time for the sparkle moments and let's all judge a little less and love a little more. Let's get onto now a topic that's really important for almost everyone that I see how this affects you know how body positivity relates to weight eating and physical activity. Tyrant I'm so happy to have you here for this conversation and I'm really interested to hear what you've got to say a lot of our audience a lot of my clients even our online clients probably ninety percent of them are women hmm and a lot of our listeners are living in larger bodies, so I wanted to talk to you about body positivity and embrace and how that relates to taking care of yourself with physical movement. Eating and how it relates to white and white loss. So I think a big question I could think of a million clients that have this question is people saying we get Glen I kind of get that but to embrace I need to lose weight. Hmm. What do you say to people like that? Yeah. Well, no, not at all. I mean there's embracing it's a it's a philosophy about how you love and respect and have endless gratitude. Attitude for your body. It's got nothing to do with weight loss weight gain a number on a scale. It's finding what feels good for you and we know a lot of people who have come on the Embraced journey, and I've actually lost weight and and it's just been a bit of a by-product of living their best life, you know for a better word. Just getting out there enjoying their bodies and eating Foods intuitively in mindfully and then they happen to lose weight and if that feels good for them great, but again, there's Ain't no rules around around weight loss weight gain and embracing its just do what feels good for you. Look I've had people also come to me and say I want to I want to lose weight and I embrace I'm learning to embrace but I want to lose weight a lot of our people. Yeah, and I think that it's okay to have that motivation and as long as you are loving in that process I think that's the real key difference. You know, we spoke about it before say with me and sugar and diabetes. I think it's the exact kind of example, you know, I am mindful of how much sugar I eat because there's diabetes in my family and I love chocolate so much but I sometimes go. Okay Darin that's enough but the joke love down you've had enough. I think it's I think it's the same thing with with weight loss and And you can do it in a loving way not in a fearful way. It's so interesting. You should say that because I think that you know, we talked about dieting versus intuitive eating and often people come to me and say Glenn. What is this? What's a meal plan is a meal plan or preparing my food. Is that dieting or is that intuitive eating and I think the more that I learn about intuitive eating the more I understand it is actually about the Y if I'm limiting my Sugar intake because sugars are bad food and it's going to make me gain weight. Then I'm kind of in a diet headspace. Yes, but if I'm limiting my sugar because like you there's a family history of diabetes and you know that a lot of sugars not going to be really good for your body. Then it's intuitive eating. Yeah, and it's respectful. Yeah a key difference is I'm just respecting what I know and respecting the knowledge that I have and I'm also respecting also how my body feels I certainly know when I eat you. Ridiculous amounts of chocolate when I've not been mindful eating that chocolate. I know I go on this crazy high and then there's awful low. So yeah, so you don't have necessarily a problem with that motivation that people a lot of people do have that that hey I do want to lose some weight, but you would say it's about the process that they go through and I think one thing that we've got to be mindful of is that sometimes there is sort of diet behavior and there He is exercise that is a punishment and we can sort of veil that like itself love. So we've got to be sure that people are not just saying sure that they're doing something different that that actually fundamentally doing something different. So I get this a lot of time in my sessions. Yeah for sure fine to be doing like a 1200 calorie meal plan and smashing themselves at the gym six days a week and kind of trying to make kind of try and fool me. Yes. This is body loving and I don't know that it kind of is yeah. Right and I think I think the do your clients they know do they know when you call them out on that. Are they like? Okay. Yes, and it's a nice for them to have someone just to remind them of that. I bet they kind of go. Yeah, that's not that doesn't actually feel good because it's just that it's the treadmill all over again, right? It's just a weight cycling that they're on but there's doing it, you know in a way that doesn't appear to be a diet. Absolutely because there are so many diets that aren't sold. As diets. Yes, you know the diving industry is got smart enough now that they sell diets as non diets. Yes, and if we look at it, you know from a psychologist language if you're when you're making a food choice if the number one focus is house this food Choice going to affect my weight. Hmm, then you dieting. Yes. It doesn't matter whether it's a detox or a 12 week program or you know a cleanse or however you call it. You're dieting. Yep, so But we need to get people to keep coming back to is how they feel in their bodies. So, you know when you're talking about weight loss and someone says look I want to lose weight because I felt better, you know a few years ago. I'm not sure I certainly wouldn't get anyone to focus on the weight loss and the key lies and what's been lost but maybe what they were doing back then you know, what was your lifestyle like back then where you just you know, moving for pleasure and going for walks and eating more intuitively and more mindfully. Bleah because we know that our bodies they're pretty clever. Right? I mean, I think we sort of overcomplicate it with all of these sort of ways that we can do trying to regulate it with all the correct. Yeah, and it just doesn't bodies will just do what our bodies want to do all day long. It's amazing. Like I know Linda bacon is in your book and she's in embrace the documentary. I think she says it beautifully the big words but you know as health professionals, we like big words so far. She talks about your body being Amazing self regulator. It's like you don't really have to calculate. Well, I've exercised this much. So I should eat this much. If you listen to your body's natural cues, it'll do all of the maths through the growlin and the lip term hunger and fullness hormones. You don't calculate that out for you and I'll just tell you because you'll get hungry and isn't that remarkable like that is the miracle of the body, right? It is the everybody relax. Relax two bodies. Got you. Your body is got G back, you know, I went to this reminds me of This is digressing. But I went to a hairdresser once I was in LA and I needed to get my hair done for a TV and I was really worried about going to like a random hair dressed. I thought what could I end up with it? Am I gonna walk out like chili Temple. I just want to you know, just a casual Pearl for TV and she just put her hand on my shoulder and she goes don't worry. I've got you and I'm just like man the level of comfort. I felt just in those words, but you trust the trust and the trust we need to have in ourselves and our bodies and I think Is a real key. I remember I did a workshop down at file X the fitness convention and I was talking about intuitive eating and enjoyable exercise and I presented what to me was like a the good story of someone who had nailed it and it's person was listening to the hunger and fullness their weight had stabilized. So they were happy about that that we enjoying food for the first time in ages are enjoying movement. And I said, how do you guys feel about this and there was a few people like this is Ali great and there was one guy right up the front he was a smart guy. He's like, oh my God, I'd be so worried for that client. And he said what what are they going to do without all of the rules? Yeah, and it kind of highlighted this point to me that I think that it's for us as health professionals. We need to be incredibly trusting of our clients ability and they have to be incredibly trusting of their own bodies. Like it's a know there's a real element of learning to trust your own body. If I don't regulate my eating with sort of a cat some type of Rules or if I don't weigh myself or if I don't have a set number of exercise sessions I have to do for set amount of time. Hmm. Will my body actually take care of me. Hmm and we know the data says, yes, it will. Absolutely. So yeah, I think that's the message. We really need to get out and maybe that's what everyone can take from. This is that your body knows exactly what to do. Stop getting in the way of what your body wants and turn can you tell us a little bit about what's been your personal experience of this because in your Background you've done the dieting. You've lost the 15 kilos. You've had the fitness body and everything following all of the rules know that that's not the right path for you. Like it's not fair hardly anyone probably sure. Yeah, but what was that Journey like for you and it sort of happened through your own exploration and through the documentary and it seems like you've gotten to this absolutely wonderful place now where you I've heard you say before that you really don't have down. Mayors about your body reading your book you've gotten more into the how-to's of how you do the intuitive eating and enjoyable movement. What does that been like for you to take that journey and how hard or easy has it been to learn to trust yourself? Hmm. Look, I think it's you know, it's been what's for five years since I stepped off that stage maybe 5 years my gosh where does time go? So, yeah. I'm in this place now. Way, I never have a bad day ever about my body. I just I'm so in awe River. I'm so grateful for it. And you know, I'm I feel really blessed. And yeah, just just I have a very different perspective on it now, but look in the earlier days, I guess it was a bit of an exploration of whom there's another way to think and it was just really I guess educating myself and finding what are all the Alternatives out there to being on this. This diet lifestyle and wanting to lose the last 5 kilos. I mean my entire life was dedicated to losing the last five kilos and none of that felt good. So I guess it was just finding the Alternatives that did feel good. And yeah, I mean my my body now, it's probably that there is the largest it's ever been but it's really the healthiest if it's ever been. I have more energy. I'm just really happy. I'm not don't get me wrong. I don't want anyone to say oh my God, she's always happy and full of energy, you know because it because I have my shit days or I have much time. So, you know, I just I say that just because of that whole I think it's important for people to know great because people see you and you are so vibrant and you're so full of life. And that's obviously it's authentic. It's real it's you but that doesn't mean that that's you 100% of the time. No, I think last Monday I had to go. Okay. I need to get under the donors and watch a horror movie. I just need to get my my self some like I said, yeah just I needed to check out and that's that's okay too. So guys if Taryn from fit has bad days you are allowed. This is your permission. Thanks. Yeah, I even I even have clients that same to me. They're like I Glenn I had this really terrible experience all this down week and they're like, you wouldn't have that like well why yeah, that's right because even when you get this stuff doesn't stop you from being human. No, that's right. And I think it's but I think the difference is Is that when you are really connected to your body and to you when you have those moments you allow them to unfold you're not giving yourself a hard time for having a bad day. You sit in it you go. Okay, something's going on. I'm I took myself to the beach last year. I just I got out of the office. I went I'm done for the day took myself to the beach. And then when I drove home, I was a different person. You know, that's just to be outside. My body was craving some vitamin D. I just needed to feel free. I got that and off I went so there's a real element turn in here of just listening whether it's about food or your physical movements or just caring for yourselves actually listening to yourself. Yeah, I think self love and loving yourself. There is no greater love in your life than the one that you have with yourself, you know, like loving you and being your own best friend and King yourself and being kind to yourself that is key that that needs to come first above anyone else on the planet is looking after you and I think it's also just having that that toolkit of what do I need to do to pull myself out of this funk or what do I need to do, you know just to feel good, you know the sparkle activities or whatever it is having that toolkit. We all need it. Yeah, and I think it's it's interesting that you've been on this journey and in your book, there are so many people who are living in all different sizes of bodies who have made this transition at some stage and you see in the book at various stages in their life to really almost forget about the scales and embrace the skin that they're in and I think those stories are so important because they your story that the other people in the book and in the documentary they show people that It really is possible because it's like you said before that, you know, people do get on this dieting treadmill, but they really see that as the only option people don't necessarily know that there is another way and they need people like you show them there is another way but that they can actually get there. Yeah, and it's not dependent on being a certain number on the scales. That's right, but I think it's also near this conversation reminds me just a little bit about the Disconnect that people are feeling and when we talk about backing ourselves and believing in ourselves, no one knows their bodies, like we know our bodies and we've just got to empower ourselves a little bit more that we know we know what to do doesn't mean we can't get guidance here and there but the classic example for me is when I there's a run it's more of a walk because it's very uphill in Adelaide up to the top of Mount lofty and it takes about an hour to get up there. It's pretty Strenuous when I get to the top I'm like I made a joke lines in my head because you can't do that. Well, you could but I always see I'm surrounded by people who getting to the top and checking their watches and they're like lick lick and checking how many calories they have burnt and look I'm not saying that those watches and those fit bits are all bad. I'm not saying that but I do think we've gone a little bit far down the road of rather. Than getting to the top of that mountain and looking at the view and just going how awesome mmm just you know, sitting in those endorphins and enjoying that moment where all of a sudden checking to see whether how many calories we've lost. That's that's a real disconnect. I think that people are feeling yeah, it's yours really reducing physical movement, which you have, you know, your body is designed to do it's a way of loving your body and honoring its ability to do whatever it can into of this as How many calories I've expended correct? I saw an eight-year-old the other day going onto a nipple Court have an absolute tantrum because her mom was trying to take the Fitbit off her to go on the nipple court and I thought oh my gosh, here we go. You know, how is that young girl going to go out and network or and just enjoy yourself and be in that moment and it's a big big problem and look I run and yeah, I listen to how I try to keep up to a certain base. Otherwise, I'm like, so that's a fast Walk so I have no problems with it. I'm just saying let's have some balance around the use of fitbit's and Technology. I love that and that's a great how-to for our listeners because I know there'll be a lot of people and because when I have these discussions with clients, they're like, yes Glen but there's always this understanding of what this thought of you don't know my body. I can't trust my body every time I've trusted my body in the past or let go of the rules then I've just spiraled out of control. But I think that's a really good how to say with your physical activity as let's forget about calories out. Let's forget about how many minutes you've done and just focus on the experience and how good it feels to be really present. Right really to be really present. And because that's where you develop the trust you really listening to the body and I think it's the same with your eating. I know that you know before Tower and got here she said Hey Glen, can we pop into somewhere that will have some food because the options for brekkie at the hotel weren't that great and it was you just listening to your body you and you thinking about you know, having to deal with me and all these conversations and that you needed energy and needed a banana a banana or a nutritionist or a dietitian. You're just listening to the body and knowing that I need some of this particular type of nutrition. It's going to help me. You'll Go There Are Rules that's right just listening yes R it really is quite simple we do overcomplicate it we do so I think that's a great take-home message for people is whether it's you're eating or your physical activity to just to start to listen to yourself forget the rules listen to yourself and trust your body because it is an amazing self regulator and it will figure out I say to clients you don't have to worry about what Your ideal weight is because your body will do it all for you. Yeah, you just be like, well, I remember you saying in one of your Instagram posts like your ideal weight is in correct me if I'm wrong with something like your ideal weight is the weight you are when you're living a life that you're happy with. Yep. Yes, they're great easy simple and cannot insert add one more thing just about the activity and people moving their bodies. I meet so many people that go to the gym and hate going to the gym and they just go over and over and over again. How is that empowering? How is that making one feel good punishment for being too unfit or too fat? Yeah, and I just think we need to remind ourselves. There are a thousand ways that we can move our bodies and there are sometimes I love to lift, you know, lots of weights and that feels good because that's where my headspace is at. There are other times where I just I need to be gentle and you know, the schedule might be crazy and I just I need to Give myself some extra nourishment and I might choose to do yoga. I think this is one of the things that people go. Oh, I can do anything at any time. Yes, you can go learn how to hip hop tonight and then next week lift some weights then dive in the ocean climb a mountain dance at home. We can all dance the home. I'm totally on the same page as you but it's weird for people. Yes, you know people like I've been to the gym twice this week of people like, so how often do you go to the gym? For some time zero. Yeah times three or four and they're like what what's your schedule about? Well, they kinda is no schedule. Yes. There's the freedom right there the self-expression. Yeah. Now let me ask you this time because he's come to my mind is that one of the things that pulls us out of listening to ourselves and loving ourselves other people's opinions, even if people kind of get this stuff for them. How do you Be body positive. How do you Embrace? How do you listen to yourself? When you've got professional people sometimes and even people in your personal life who don't necessarily feel the same way who aren't embracing the diversity of shapes and sizes that we all live in. Yeah. Well, I think I think we're really lucky 10 years ago finding a GP or anyone as a health professional who understands and believes in health at every size would have Near impossible. Correct. Correct. There are more and more popping up everywhere across Australia. That is really exciting. So maybe 10 years ago. Yep. Ouch not sure what to do. You have a choice now seek them out they are out there. So that's in terms of the professionals love that when it comes to friends and relatives and I always ask people to make a pact with their friends and it's not just your at dinner and you start going. Oh, hey. Talking about body image and then you have a little conversation create a space with your friends. Let's catch up for a coffee. I want to talk to you about something that's really important to me. I'll sit down conversation. That's right, but it's creating the space not just like we're catching up for dinner on Friday night, and I'm just going to raise it then because it's not then elevated if you call your friends and go I have something I want to talk to you about. It's really important to me if I'm be like, what is she going to talk about awesome instead of elevates and It's the space for something really Dynamic to happen. So and talk to your friends about the journey that you've been on where you want to go some of the conversations that you have and have had over the years that perhaps don't feel good anymore and ask them, you know, do you think that we could maybe I don't know put a ban on fat shaming. Yeah body shaming. Yeah, and I've done that with a bunch of my friends and it's really funny and fascinating what happens because we've been so programmed to make a judgment and to say something about other people. It's all about ourselves. It's rolls off at tongue right A friend of mine was going where we're going to Barley's a couple of years ago and she was talking about bathers and she immediately went. Oh my god. I've got to go by the shopping and I hate my body whatever she said and someone else called her out and went that's not very embracing. She's like, oh, yeah, it's not oops and they were just carried on WE because we do forget because we are so programs. So having a pact with your friends to start kind of removing the conversations that aren't For yeah, we have it we call that with our clients and no fat dog girl. Yeah, nice. Yeah, but it is it's not just a blanket rule. It's about having the conversation and figuring out what works for you because it's like we were talking about before it's it's not a one-size-fits-all. Hmm. Absolutely it up to you as a group to figure out. Well, you know, there are these common ways we do to kind of hate on our bodies judge other people's bodies and that's not a great thing for us. So what do we want to do differently? Yeah and get really proactive is like calling a meeting feel. Really odd? Yeah, but if you want to do something and actually do it and not just have it the passing conversation. Then create the space creating. The space is important. It's like relatives. It's something that I suggest to many parents whose who their parents the grandparents of the kids say really unhelpful things. It's like ouch, you know the whole oh, you're so pretty or be careful what you eat or just just this messaging that is even really big gain weight or that Parade and it's as a pair. You just go. Oh my gosh, like it had a walk. So again calling up that parent and saying I need to talk to you about something that's really important to me. This is really upsetting me and having that dialogue. Do you understand what I'm saying about how much it elevates that really important conversation. I think that's such a powerful message because it's different to just and so many of my clients in the future going to be hearing this it's different to just calling someone out when it happens. You're actually taking a pause point to say, let's create a space to have a real conversation. Yeah and create some real and Lasting change. Yeah. I absolutely love that. So when it comes to health professionals, this is not you know to you know 1990s. Hmm, you are going to be able to find people and even not we have a lot of people that if they can't find someone in a small town. People you can see dieticians psychologists even virtual trainers like Louise green on on Skype or online. So there are people that you can see ya when it comes to your network Elevate the conversation and really, you know, and I love that just that little I think sometimes it's so important for people to have those little mechanisms and I love those words of I need to talk to you about something. Hmm and make no mistake. It probably is In might be a little uncomfortable to but you think about it from a say a parent's perspective with their child speaking to the grandparents. Would you rather just have 10 15 minute conversation? It's a little bit uncomfortable or would you rather eat a rather than having your child grow up battle with their body and the way so many friends friends and friends friends who say unhelpful things because got a nip in the bud and say no we're not doing this anymore. Yeah. I love that and I often find sometimes I'll encourage clients to have similar conversations. I'm going to do it better now that we've had this conversation. But sometimes even I'm surprised, you know might even have a child talking to her parent about this and I think all the cheese the parents pretty strong pretty militant in their diet and it's not going to go well and they'll give you know, they've had a proper conversation and have been surprised with the results because of course a lot of those people they are either they're sort of shaming the person without knowing it or they're trying to help so the people do want to help it's just about helping them understand what's really going to to help. And support that person. Yeah. So the last thing I want to ask and you've actually answered all of our audience has questions from our Facebook group Next Door, but one I'm going to ask because I have so many clients and no one's been brave enough to ask it is specifically for women and specifically for single women. I see a lot of single women who feel like their bodies are getting in the way of them kind of finding the right partner. And some of them will kind of ever actually had sort of feedback from people like you've got a really pretty phase or I think you're really lovely but this weight thing is a thing for me and you know, I kind of when I hear that I'm like, oh you dick head. Yes, but then I kind of I'm sort of trying to Grapple with the reality of that the idiot. These people are struggling. So what would you say to somebody who's who's worried about how the way that They look is going to affect their dating life and their ability to find a partner. Well, this is come up with quite a few times for me to I've had people ask this question. Yeah, and I always throw it back and say would you want to be with somebody who puts the focus on your weight gain or your weight lost? Is that is that really what you want as a foundation of your relationship? And of course the answer is no, you know, we want to we want to connect and be with people because of who they are and The things that they do and the times and the joy that you spend and common interests and and all of that is what makes our relationship not that's not quite me, but would I want someone who is going to make that a focal point of the relationship, correct? Yeah, so interesting and that's a great Point tire and it speaks to this. You know, I see a lot of people probably most of the people that I see are in a relationship and they're often worried that their their bodies change over time will my partner Kept my body and and I kind of say well if your partner still with you and they're happy with you, then it's you know, the provides that safety net. But she of course people don't want to be with someone that I've got to be a certain size or shape or have this certain look for you to accept me. It's pretty shallow, isn't it? I think that you would marry someone or want to be with someone just because of how they of how they look it's amazing get back to reappear in the film. You know, how she changed to Rio, you know, how much her body and her Faison every part of her changed and Michael loves her because he loves her. Yeah. No because he loves her body and sides of February. Yeah shapes and sizes and he's supported you the the whole time. So interesting that you should say, it's very very shallow and very superficial one of my mentors a guy named George Blair West. He's a psychiatrist and he specializes in weight and relationships and he says something similar to what you just he said, so if you want to find a partner and just look your very best to find a partner and that be the basis of the relationship is because you're going to get really good at selecting really shallow superficial people who are going to be terrible relationship father's that's a great way to find a terrible relationship. Absolutely. Yeah, it's let me just sit setting you up for disaster and divorce if he's probably find someone to just loves you and loves your spirit and loves, you know the time that you spend. Heather I absolutely love that Tyrant thank you so much for spending this time with us. It's you know the messages I'm getting out of out of this is learn to trust your body. Hmm forget the rules because your body can take care of itself. And in that that context of trusting your body get the right people around you whether it's professionals whether it's your social network by making those packs. Having those elevated conversations and also that extends to the new people that you choose to accept or not accept into your life. Absolutely. Now, I do want to just quickly talk about your book Because by the time that people get to this conversation, the book will be out so much of the stuff we talked about today is in the book in a lot of detail. I want to encourage everyone to go out there and read it. It's a brilliant. Out too and I love that. It's you're getting into like what we've done today some of the real nitty-gritty and a lot of the things we talked about today are covered in the book in a lot more detail and there are some things that we haven't talked about which I'm so happy. We don't have time to talk about boobs and sex and their stuff about vulvas in the book. So it's so terribly shameful that we don't have time to talk about that. But if Sexton vulvas, I love that those useless. It's gonna be like, I need to go get that positive stuff. Exactly Karen. Thank you so much for being with us and coming on the show. I hope everyone reaches out to you. If they haven't if they've been sort of lying under a rock for a few years. They have to watch Embrace sure and will definitely provide all the links for embrace yourselves. Book, so thank you and thank you for all the beautiful work you do. I thank you for having me such a pleasure. Thank you so much for listening. I really hope you connect with Taryn and get involved with the body positive Community. The thing I really want to invite you to do is head on over to the Embrace kids go fund me page to donate to the Embrace kids documentary campaign. The original Embrace documentary was crowdfunded. It was supported by people just like you and me and it became a catalyst for worldwide social. Sometimes Although our work is so meaningful. I must say that I do kind of feel that we're doing things at the wrong end. Tyrone has seen the need for children to hear the message of body positivity and she's now creating a second documentary to help buffer those messages of body shame objectification unrealistic beauty standards that our kids are faced with today and help set them up with a a positive body image that will last for life. If you go to the page a u dot gofundme.com forward slash Embrace - kids - documentary and the links also provided in the description here. You can donate as much or as little as you can to the cause on May 26th. Terran is going to run a marathon. Phone other members of the Embrace Team all over the world are running a whole variety of distances themselves and you can organize to go for your own run with her or cheer from the sidelines with your support to help get Embrace kids off the ground turns work and her whole impact is built on love. So please show her some love if you can thanks so much for being with me on the Glenn McIntosh show I am Yours in a wonderful relationship with the body you live in and I'll look forward to seeing you really soon.
Today’s episode features probably the biggest name in body image today - the dynamic, authentic, sparkly powerhouse and Director of the Embrace Documentary Taryn Brumfitt. Taryn vulnerably shares her personal story, we explore the often missed “how-tos” of developing an authentically positive body image, and dive deep into the relationship between body image, eating, exercise and weight. In this special conversation Taryn and I discuss: - That we are over hating our bodies. - How health professionals are as ready for change as their clients! - Taryn’s viral “Reverse Before-and-After” shot that “broke people’s brains” - How you can Embrace the miracle of your body. - Why we need to share our personal body image stories - Using our social media for the power of GOOD! - How to become AUTHENTICALLY body positive. - Judging less and loving more. - Having conversations with people we DON’T agree with! - Why it’s important to be vulnerable. - How to “find your tribe” of supportive friends and health professionals! - Can you lose weight in a loving way? - Accepting your body when others around you don’t. - Creating space for elevated conversations around bodies. - Dealing with parents and grandparents fat shaming your kids. - Taryn’s advice for people who feel weight is stopping them finding a partner. Please support Taryn as she runs a marathon on May 26 to raise funds for the Embrace Kids Campaign: https://au.gofundme.com/embrace-kids-documentary Links from Podcast: Psychology of Eating, Weight, and Body Image Support Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/WeightManagementPsychology/ Part 1: Follow Taryn on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bodyimagemovement/ Follow Glenn on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/glennmackintosh/ “If Not Dieting, Then What?” Book: https://www.amazon.com/If-Not-Dieting-Then-What/dp/1741144795 “Health at Every Size” Book: https://www.amazon.com/Health-At-Every-Size-Surprising/dp/1935618253/ Watch “Embrace” Documentary: https://bodyimagemovement.com/embrace/see-the-film/ Taryn’s Viral “Before & After” Shot: https://bodyimagemovement.com/long-take-learn-love-body/ Embrace Yourself Book: https://www.booktopia.com.au/embrace-yourself-taryn-brumfitt/prod9780143787051.html Dr Emma Johnston: http://ejclinpsych.com.au/ *Body Positive Follows* Louise Green: https://www.instagram.com/louisegreen_bigfitgirl/ Body-Posi Panda: https://www.instagram.com/bodyposipanda/ Jade Beall: https://www.instagram.com/jadebeallphotography/ Renee Airya: https://www.instagram.com/reneeairya/ Style Me Sunday: https://www.instagram.com/stylemesunday/ Michaela Skilney: https://www.instagram.com/michaela_skilney/ Part 2: Glenn’s Pigtailed Instagram Post: https://www.instagram.com/p/BhLYoA6HiLp/?taken-by=glennmackintosh Taryn’s Lorna Jane Instagram Post: https://www.facebook.com/bodyimagemovement/posts/949467578514251 Part 1 of Interview (for follow/unfollow): https://www.weightmanagementpsychology.com.au/how-to-embrace-body-positivity-with-taryn-brumfitt-pt-1/ Comment with your SPARKLE ACTIVITIES on our YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxcPA5Q4vio Part 3: Turia Pitt: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=617085683 George Blair-West: http://dr.blair-west.com/ Want free vids, all the podcasts, articles & special offers? 