Are you always expecting something mentally projecting into the future instead of actually being present and doing your best. Are you always trying to manipulate the outcome of certain situations so that you can be happy because the only way that you can feel happy is to get validation and approval from other people or things have to go your way all the time. That's the only way you can feel good. Well in that case there are something deep inside that you need to address and there's probably this whole that you're trying to patch up through your expectations and your mental projections. And what ends up happening is that you actually smoke the whole even bigger because every time you expect something in the future every time you expect somebody to do something a certain way so that you liked it so that you feel good about yourself every time you expect things to go your way so that you can feel good about yourself. And they don't or it doesn't how do you feel how do those expectations those mental projections that you have actually leave you once you end up realizing that you were expecting way to much or your mental projection was totally off or that you really had. No realistic view of the situation. I struggle with this for a long time because I used to always have an idea of Was going to happen. I will always project into the future always try to manipulate the outcome and hope for things to go a certain way and that would be let down every single time. If you resonate with this then you know that it's not a nice experience. It's not fun. It doesn't feel good at all. And you need to get rid of it because quite honestly it's a nightmare to keep living in the state where you're always waiting for salvation at some future point and there is no salvation and you know that by now if you've been projecting into the future Future maybe you didn't get the result that you wanted whether that's on an exam or on the date or in your business or a meeting with a client, or maybe you wanted to get a raise at work and they turned you down. The only way to really get rid of this is to let go of the need for something to fulfill you and that can be really tough because what I'm going to need you to tell yourself what I told myself what ended up shifting this making the paradigm shift for me. Was really taking on the philosophy and idea and really believing that hey, you know what? I'm good enough as I I approve of me. I validate me and I actually feel good about me and anything that might happen in the future any success or even failure. It doesn't determine who I am. It doesn't make me a better or worse person. You see I'm still a good person. No matter how I perform whether I perform amazing or rather. My performance is terrible. I'm still the same Raphael if this video sucks for you that doesn't change anything for me because I'm making it because I want to make it and I'm not expecting you to respond to certain way. But if I was trying to talk a certain way or try to make you feel a certain We're trying to manipulate so that you leave a nice comment and tell me about how great I am. It would be a nightmare. I wouldn't want to record and definitely not every day. Like what I'm doing, you know, it just wouldn't happen because you're always in a strain you always feel tired because you're trying to micromanage and manipulate those results. I need you to find peace with that. You're okay as you are and whether or not things go your way. She's still good. You're still a good person doesn't change anything. NG let's say it goes well well great. Great. You got what you wanted awesome congrats feels good right for a moment or two at least and then it's on to the next thing and now you you're waiting for that to give you pleasure. Let's say it goes bad. Oh my expectations were met. I'm unhappy. I'm frustrated. I'm angry maybe even start pushing those emotions and getting frustrated with people around you. Maybe you shove it down and create some deep trauma for yourself that lost for the rest of your life. Do you really want that? Or the alternative is you know what? I'm good enough as I am. I'm happy with myself. I love myself. And whether or not this goes my way. It's okay. Just try that whether or not it goes my way. It's okay whether or not it goes your way. It's okay. It's okay. No matter what because you'll still be fine. And that's what most of us don't get because we think if it doesn't go away then our life is ruined our reputation our future everything. It's just over, you know, if this one date doesn't go right then. We're going to meet that perfect Parker. I'm never going to find love never ever ever ever ever. This one date went wrong. Never find Love Of course, that's not true. I went through a lot of bad dates before I got into an amazing relationship. That's now lasted for over five years. So consider that you might have to go through a lot of failure to reach success and when you're constantly putting those expectations up to win every time you go into a situation you're blocking yourself because the road to success is paved with Oh Yer over and over and over again tripping over how many times have I recorded a bad video? I did it every day for six months in a row before I made my first good one. I promise you scroll down to the bottom of my channel check out my first video and you'll see the difference between that and now is a lot of failure a lot of idiots that didn't hit off a lot of work that I didn't really pay. And if I was sitting there saying to myself I didn't get 3 million views, you know, what never mind never mind. That was my I want to 10,000 views are nothing. I'm just gonna leave I'm gonna give up right now. I forgot about the numbers. I forgot about the results and I just did it because I knew it was the right thing to do. And if you know, it's the right thing to do it anyway, and if it's not just let it go because those expectations. The only thing they will do in your life. It's harm you make you feel bad make you feel frustrated make you feel unhappy make you feel unsatisfied you ungrateful little right because you start to see everything is bad. You start judging everything you have in your life as well s instead of saying hey, I'm grateful for what I have. I love what I have. I'm happy where I am if I get that success great. If I don't keep working keep trying keep Goin not to project into the Future Hope for some result. If I don't get it then you know what? There's no point to any of this anymore. Just never mind this whole thing give up on life suicide right now. What's that? What's going on? What are you expecting Let It Go stop projecting. Thing whether or not it goes your way. It's okay. You're still a good person still the same person. Even if you succeed even if you fail you're still the same person. It's just the situation doesn't make or break you it doesn't make or break your life. You are so much bigger than that. Remember that one day you're going to die. That's an expectation. You're going to die. And at that point everything will be stripped away from you. And the only thing you will care about this what kind of impact you made another people what difference you made how much you cared how much they cared about you love compassion. Sharing contribution not do they get the promotion not did she or he say yes to me. That's not what you're going to be left with all that money in your bank account. Don't get to take it with you. Sorry. I'm sorry. You don't get to take it with you. That's it. It's done gets to stay here. While you disappear so live with that in mind and perhaps you will understand that these situations aren't such a big of a deal. And that you are so much bigger and better than all of this and that whether or not it goes your way. It's okay.
I share with you how you can let go of all expectations in life! S U B S C R I B E : https://www.youtube.com/user/RafaelEliassen?sub_confirmation=1  Coaching with Rafael: https://www.rafaeleliassen.com/coaching  #LearningToLetGo #LearnToLetGo #LettingGo #LettingGoExpectations #LetGoOfExpectations #StopExpectations #StoppingExpectations #PersonalDevelopment #SelfHelp #SelfImprovement #SelfHelp #Motivation #Motivational #MotivationalSpeech #MotivationalSpeaker  What is the height of confidence? The death of all expectations. True confidence and fulfilment come when you don’t need anything to heal you. Those timeless un-healed wounds, that bleed at the slightest of touch. The suturing of these wounds is what will bring true confidence and happiness. A point where no failure or success can make or break you. Expectations are like bubbles waiting to burst. We think and fantasise our success and hope that will make those deep-rooted issues go away. But you know if you have ever projected something in the future,  If you fail you feel bad; it bleeds. If you succeed, you set a new goal; blinded by your unmet fulfilment. So, both failure and success won’t help you escape this nightmare. What you have to do is patch your wounds yourself. Love yourself as you are, regardless of any outcome. Loving yourself unconditionally is what will get you out of this incessant loop of misery. You are good enough as you are. You don’t need to achieve something or do something. 