Hey guys, this is Lisa and Rebecca and we are here on the secret life of weddings. If you like drama, you're in the right place where we tell you the world's craziest, but true wedding stories. So get ready for the drama on the secret life of weddings. What is up? Everybody? It is episode 76 of the secret life of weddings podcast. This is Lisa and Rebecca as you know, because we've done this about 80 times before well 75 are we supposed to keep introducing ourselves? I don't know. Well, I figure if there's a new person coming in feel so weird doing it. I know it's very like I feel like I feel really weird saying my name I feel like this is news at 11. Am I the only one like do you feel weird saying your own name? Yeah. It's a weird thing. It's like hearing yourself on a recording and you're like that isn't Yes. Yeah, it's I can't listen to us. I fucking have to you you all need to but I don't listen to us know like a couple times. You've said. Oh go listen, like hear the difference Bubba Bubba and I'll be like I will listen for all of like 5 seconds and then I'm like, oh my God, is it such an idiot doesn't like an idiot. Does it make you squirm or scream? Yeah. I don't like the sound of my voice. I feel like it. So I want any when I'm when I'm talking the Great. Now yeah, my voice sounds very deep see me, it's not I know like this is why I'm confused because you know your voice always sounds a certain way to but yeah on a recording your kind of like yeah, so when I hear it play back, I'm like, I have a really awful voice you do not know but I do you don't so I'm in the wrong business. I hate to break it to you. It's too late. Yes, it's really got that. It's above your head. You're In it. Yeah, it's official. Hmm. We're doing this podcast in case you don't know Rebecca. It's actually happening. I made it this far and you can keep on going so funny guys. We have some some news the the 10-minute hard marker for the chitchat has to go in the garbage. I'm sorry. It has immediate my explosion. It has exploded we were listening to you. You guys are telling us especially in our Facebook group like over a hundred people voted there. Like new no screw the time limit. Yeah, we don't like it. So me either listen, we are gonna we know what you think. No listen. So this is what we're going to do. We are going to try very hard though to do a timestamp instead. So we are going to try to you know, compromise between the two choices and put a little time stamp note in the notes. Yes, if you like, okay at 12 minutes and 54 seconds, you know, we get into the stories. Yes, so I will do that for you because I love you guys and honestly if we have much More to say like was right at the end. It's right at the end. Yeah, but you know, we're not that structure if I mean, that's not who we are. We're a chit chat eesh. Oh, yeah, and I tried we tried really hard to kind of please everyone and I think that was almost a mistake people are like you can't please everyone, you know, so don't try and it's a hard thing because you're trying to make people happy and if you ever see like reviews we go to look to chat then you feel like you have to fix it. So if you like the chit chat, please go say something because I need to read that it would be like I'm doing the right thing here. Yes, it's you know what? I mean? I need positive reinforcer holiday - guys. I need validation every minute of your life. Do you understand me? I want emails. I want texts. I want reviews though. Just just it does go a long way from you for my self-confidence. But anyway, yeah, I don't sound crazy at all. Do I know you're good? That's fine worried about it's fine. So we're just going to let it let it flow. Let it ebb and flow let it flow. Let it flow. Let it flow. Let it flow. I like that. I thought you meant your Christmas fan. So I known I'd like Christmas not so Rebecca brought me my Starbucks this morning. I did I love her so much. She texts me and she goes I've got your Starbucks and I wrote back in my heart. I laughed out loud and there's like, that's awesome. I just oh my god with this girl brings me Starbucks. I want to cry a little but what did I give you in return When you arrived I got some crack you got some Christmas. Crack if you guys haven't had Christmas crack, I'm excited to try it you need to yeah, this is some good shit, especially if you aren't familiar like we have some of our Australian friends that you know, Kim she didn't know what it was and we get her so it is like you take butter and dark brown sugar. Okay, and you cook it together in a saucepan to looks like liquid and you're stirring and stirring and stirring it then you get she's listening so she can make more Christmas Crack by the way, her face just turned into cooking. Here, I'm a bit of a baker. He's a baker. Yeah, then you take your supposed to line the pan I didn't because I ran out of stuff to line it with like tinfoil or whatever. Yeah or parchment paper, but you should line the pan with tin foil. It says and you put crackers along the bottom like across kind of okay, like just as a cracker just as a cracker. Okay, lately it in the pan. Yeah, and then you pour the hot butter sugar. Sugar mixture on top all over so it goes all flat then you take a cup of chocolate chips and you while it's hot and you sprinkle them all over the crack. So they melt and then you take a spatula and just smooth it all over and then put it in the fridge for a couple hours and then you literally like just cool it down. Yeah, actually no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Once it's in the pan. You actually have to bake it for like 5 minutes or something. There's a recipe online. Don't don't this is not a everyone's eyes. Everyone's listening. I'm writing this down. It's like oh gosh, this is not you know, what I'll do. I'll try to put a link to a recipe. Yeah in the show notes because I love you guys. This is not a baking podcast. Please do not take me at my word right now. I'm going to put a link to the to the recipe because this is the shit. Yeah. But anyway, you bake it for like 5 minutes. It's very short period of time. Yeah, and then you put the the chocolate on and it's you know melts and you put it in the fridge chill it then you just break it apart you crack it apart which is part of the reason it's called crack is also called crap because you can't fucking stop eating it. Once you start eating it yum. Yes sokka's like toffee tasting almost it's with grape all chocolate and all. Oh, I'm bringing I'm baking this weekend. So I'm bringing you a cookie or a few different kinds. I just rolled on the bike. Yeah, if you're short circuiting sounds wipe that up. Let me just let me just yeah, I have something to tell you. My husband is a huge year as you know football. Junkie. Yes, right. I do he's obsessed with football. Yes, so Now games are on Thursday nights, right? So he was of course on my couch. I call it my goodness. I swear I wash all my shows. It's the marital couch Rebecca. So he's in there watching football in like fine. Whatever. I'll go up to bed and watch TV and I went upstairs and all I hear is him yelling me back back and I'm like, what? Look what someone I'm thinking something is wrong. Yeah run downstairs and like what? He's like past the couch beside him like come sit down and I'm like, I'm not watching. A football no, so then he's like no trust me just sit down. Okay, no problem. I sit down all of a sudden guess who comes out who Ryan Reynolds Ryan Reynolds my boy. Oh, is there at halftime? Oh, you're so cute being interviewed. You are such a bad girl. I was like good man get that. My husband knows me. Well, yes, he does. He's like, I'm like, can you take some pictures because I didn't have my phone with me. It's like of course and then Add me I was he sends them to me. He's like, there you go. That's for your spank bank. Oh my God, like that's amazing. This is the only time you'll ever catch me watching football. He's got a good sense of humor that one and I had to show you my redneck Willie, right? Oh my God, is he of Canadian Club? He has a bottle of Canadian Club. Wow. So Rebecca, you have to put that in the groove. Okay. I did did you yeah. Oh, okay guys go ask for to be tagged in that one because I didn't even see that thread it was part. In someone else's thread you guys. Can I just can I just give you a commendation here, please that the turkey has made it back turkey man has danced his heart back into our Facebook group. Yes him and his his little turkey tiny out fittings to sue thanks to sue for finding that Lindsey so funny. She messaged me on messenger and she's and she he sent it to her directly. I'm sorry. What? Yes the guy in the Video Yeah sent it to her directly and their friends ha ha ha. We will wait. So how did how did they get to know each other? She I can't remember what she said she found him or found his video or something. Maybe I think she found him. Okay what it was and she at and she asked him because it got taken down everywhere. Yeah, and he sent her he asked her over Isley. I feel so special is the hero she is the girl. Can I just say though? I'm also Sort of a hero because I approved the post. Yes, because Facebook done this never happens guys. We don't have thank you. Thank you. I'm telling ya. We don't actually have you know approvals on posts yet. I'm pretty sure we'll get to that point soon. Yeah, but right now y'all are behaving so it's like we don't need to do this for the children, but like Facebook immediately like recognize it actually checked the outgoing YouTube link and was like this. We have nudity and oh my God, whatever offensive content. Do you want to allow this post and I'm like fuck. Yes. Yes approve uproot and so I approve that stuff as quick as I humanly could for real because I'm sorry, I believe in Freedom of turkeys and I just think it should exist in our crew turkey freedom of turkey cause this is the turkey really free. It's fake. It's not real. I would just like to reiterate that this is Fake turkey it is dancing. Man's you know, what you can't see anything. There is no nudity. There is its animatronic it's funny. It's silly and stupid and it's very festive. Let's be honest. Yeah, the only thing that would make it more festive as if he had like a Santa hat on. Yes, wouldn't that be great? Yes. Can we get a part to please or rack the turkey and him in lights? Oh, yeah, but that might electrocute them. Let's now know how sure he's not real. No, but I just met the lights might electrocute him how I'm not worried about electrocuting the fake turkey. He'd be fine. Okay. Well do it for Rebecca's Amusement? No. No, we have something very important to talk about. Yes. What what I got up to with lights. Oh, yes. Did you even put that in the notes to talk about? No, you forgot know. This is kind of huge. Yeah. Oh, okay. We never About it. Oh, I think because yeah, you post I post videos so I posted a video but for those people who are not in our group or drape follow us on YouTube, right? Right. They might not know that I enacted my, you know, petty petty revenge on Cruella de Vil next door. So the one we called Betty you'll recall that she I'm not going to bore you like you have to go back and listen to the the episode where I talked about it and I think in the video I actually mentioned which episode it is. I I can't remember. I think it was like yeah, but you give a good detail in the episode to write in your video. I do. Yeah, I give a bit of a backstory. Yeah of like what happened. But yeah, he was mean to me. I tried to be nice to her. She was really mean to me. I've seen her twice in 7 years. She was yelling at me both times. Yeah. I tried to connect with her and human level. She completely was like fuck you and I was like cool. She told me to move my yard waste bag and I said, you know, what if you could just ask me nicely like a person I probably would have done it. Yeah, but she was Rude and mean I was like, fuck you. I am going to keep it all year. I even keep it forever. It is never leaving my fucking lawn now and so I decorated it for Christmas and I recorded the entire thing the whole thing from this is, you know, telling the story. Yeah going to the mall going to the store buying her like shit to put on the bag like, you know from a bow got some lights out of my garage and I ended up using and which was actually perfect because half of Them didn't work and there was not one single blinking light apparently is everybody's favorite part. Yes. So basically I enacted this revenge and it's got a star on top and everything and I even got extra bags from my work because there was extra Leafly. I went a whole a Kyle took it to the next level of petty people were like, you're my fucking hero for doing it and I know people probably some people are like, it's a couple people were like literally two out of like 1,200 people who watched it. I think yeah, we're like, Oh, you should just go make someone's day instead or do something positive. Oh, geez, you need to get a sense of humor because if you don't laugh or do something like this now and then with horrible people in the world. Yeah. Maybe she should do something. Nice for someone. Yeah, you know, yeah and not treat me like crap. But anyway can't always that can't always be I do that 99% of I did a lot of nice things. Yes, you know and like it doesn't always, you know, eventually sometimes you're just like, you know, what sometimes You need to do bad things just to feel your soul and to know you're going to hell officially. I'll drive the bus. I don't care. Yeah, you know what though it like what I did. Was it Petty for sure, but funny, I hope and hurt her. That doesn't hurt her. It just it Jake. I would say if you're hurting her then I build. Yeah, Lisa, you know, I would know that's the thing. I would never do that. I would never like exactly say her name or show her fate. No, it's factually. Yeah, but I know she's never gonna I know about no, you know and this is like harmless really? Yeah, exactly. If anything it's just one of those things that gets under people's skin. They're like, ah, yeah, exactly. But anyway people just 99% of people really got it. So if you want to see that video go to youtube.com slash C / secret life of weddings and it's up there. Yeah or just search yard waste Christmas bag. I think it's I have a question. Yeah. What did you tell your kids about this? I'm obviously must have like inquired why no bags are dressed up for no they didn't ask. No. Okay. I did tell my neighbors though. My my mate, my neighbor Laura came out. Who's awesome. She's the greatest. She's the other neighbor on the other side. We share a driver with her. Thank God. It's her like yeah, no kidding. Right so that families amazing. So she came out. I was like, she she particularly has had some run-ins with the other neighbors, so Over the dogs. She was the one that called The Humane Society. I like, you know, gotcha. So anyway because she's got dogs and she cares of course. She's a wonderful person. So anyway, I told her and she fuckin starts laughing because she's got a daughter as well who's a little bit older like older than my kids. So she's maybe like 10 11. Yeah 12 in there anyway, so I told her and she just thought it was the greatest thing. She actually went and called her mom out to come see it. She knows how horrible this other name. Yeah, the whole street knows how horrible this woman is, so I told her the story. Re she starts laughing. Ah, so she goes through the best neighbors ever. Yes. Just thought it was great. So, you know, my neighbors think it's funny for the record. You know, what I would love to see very tasteful little tree. Yes, it is. You think it's awesome like seeing it in person. Thank you. You know what I want you to do next year what because I feel like this bag should just stick around. Everybody says that but it's already falling apart. I don't think it physically can't then you need a new bag. Oh, it'll kill Justin. He already that you should have seen his face when I was denied. It is very it would have been so great. What if it was like a scene from The Grinch and who's from Whoville and everyone comes and surrounds the bag and puts an ornament on it each and they're going fall who Forest of everyone in the neighborhood is invited I guess added ornament to me baby. I need Little People tiny little who's owed around it in a giant like in a giant ring, that'd be amazing to that's actually an amazing idea because I've been trying to come up with a Christmas cake idea. And I was thinking about doing a grinch one. That's actually a pretty cool idea. Ooh, nice. Yeah, it's they have a cake raffle at Jill school. Oh, I haven't Jill story. But you know what? I'm going to save it for after the episode. Okay, because we have a lot to talk about still because you can you tell we've been saving ourselves would have been like cutting herself. I feel so much better that that was went because we would have had a hard stop seven minutes ago. Yeah in the middle of something you wouldn't have heard about yard waste Christmas and that's just you know, what, you know, I don't miss the end that Ryan Reynolds was Halftime show and that is how can you go about your Tuesday or Monday? If you guys if you want early episodes go to the patreon and become a become a patreon member for $8.00. I think it is a month you get early episodes by whole day. So yeah Monday morning goodness, go do that again on.com secret life of weddings because I have to tell you where to go. But anyway, how can you not go about your Monday or Tuesday without knowing round Ronald's was at the halftime show exactly. How can you not know? He's so hot? Anyway, I love him. So he's my whole house. I'm just saying he's your hall pass. It's official. So let's get into our stories, but then we will get back in because I know you have a rant. I do have a rant but I will save it for a little lace save it for after and I have a juicy story, but it is a rant that applies to anyone who's getting married. So if you're getting married, you need to know that you need to know this. Okay, so I did something different with our stories you did. Yes. Okay. So we're starting off today s episode with a video I saw okay. Okay. So good idea of how podcast Rebecca I know. I know I'm gonna post it. Okay, because as you know, we get many stories sent in and links to stories Etc. This video was sent in by Steve. Oh just a couple so of course by the title of it hammered drunk girl ruins. Wedding it's the title of it. Okay, and I thought okay another, you know, I mean sounds promising at all. Yeah, I assumed another sloppy drunk falling all over herself Etc, right? No more than that. You look like you're taking in all the energy. So I basically wrote a story about the video. Oh deep. Okay. So I'm gonna this is something going to start doing because there's so many videos. Oh sure fail videos from wedding. Oh, yeah, so I thought I'm gonna do I'm gonna make this the thing Lisa doesn't know about this. I'm just trying to know I'm very fascinated by this whole thing. Okay, so the video starts with everyone dancing at a wedding reception under a tent. Okay, okay. It's pretty you see the bride and groom dancing in the background. Everyone looks like they're having a good time. Then the video focuses on a guest in the red dress. She's clearly busting. Why is it always a red dress? I don't know. She's clearly busting a move. I thought you're going to say busting out of oh, no, she's busting moves. Okay, okay and decides to use the pole. One of the poles as a prop to enhance Her Moves. Yeah. I know what you were thinking that it all collapsed. However the Lady in Red Shuffles over to the groom and proceeds to pull him by his tie to dance with him. Oh, no holding him around the Dance Floor. The bride in the background is so not impressed. So he's Zooms in on the bride. Oh and she's pest really yes. Oh no only so yes, it's right wedding. She should be pulling him around the pole the other chick lady in in the red dress releases the groom and grabs an ultra gentlemen. I think it was probably the Father of the Bride or the groom. I hope it was the Father of the Bride. Oh my God, she dances with him for a moment. And then she's back to her sturdy pool. It would appear that. She really wanted to put her pole dancing skills to the test and jumped up onto the pole tearing the entire tent down. No, yes. Oh that's amazing. All you see is like people falling in the tent coming down on top of everybody. Oh my God, but wait, we're not done but wait, there's more. The video focuses on a group helping the bride whose face is covered in blood. No. Yes, and that's where it ends that is so much worse than the golf cart. See we weren't that evil laughing at the yes. Oh my God. So yeah her face and she looks the bride. She doesn't even look like she's like upset that. She's hurt. She just looks so fucking mad because you know, you could see it coming. You could see all this coming in now now she's wearing all white her face not too. The whole one side of her face is covered in blood. Oh my God. Yeah, so I think came from her nose, right? But yeah. Hope she didn't look like to hurt her. I'll oh my God my goodness that poor thing. Yeah, not the woman the prize. Yeah, but it's so it was funny watching the lady was like you're like it was hilarious ruined wedding day was hilarious. So you're going to put this video up in our group, right? Yes for I will you who'll I will guide drama? Llamas? Yes, listen drama llamas. I almost want to call our screams also drama. Llamas. I know right? Right. Yeah makes sense. Yeah. Hello. Llamas kind of like blady God calls her fans monsters. Yes, you know you could be are llamas. If you enjoy drama llamas, you can go to our fans group on Facebook will put this video up for you. Yes, so you can see it because so this is going to be a regular thing. I'm going to do damn girl. Yeah, I think that's a great idea. Yeah, that's awesome. And then we can chat about there's just so many videos. I'm like, you know what I saw the video and I'm like oh but it's a video and then I was like, wait a second. Hold on. How can I incorporate that? You're like I have an idea here. I can write words that describe the video exactly without playing it. That's actually pretty fabulous. Yeah, that's great. And then you have to go to our fan group to see the videos. Yeah. So yay weren't you want to see them because seriously, I we're up to like 1700 people over 1,700 people amazing, which is great. It's a really cool Community, but the highs it is not for the faint of heart. So please don't come in if you don't have a sense of humor, and I'm sorry if you're if You don't find the shit funny. Yeah, just it's fine. I'm not judging you. I'm totally just like big but just don't be fair. We don't wrapping or proteases. No, no, you know homophobic biphobic nothing anything like that. Yeah. You're getting a boot. Yeah. Don't be a shitty human being. Yeah gonna be kicked out but I'm saying like for instance if a man, it's fun in there with a fake turkey on his drawing dancing offends. You probably not the best place to see the bar resetting. This is the bar if you pass the turkey, Test yes, you're allowed in if you can't pass you don't have to like the turkey to know Roll On by just scroll by if you've passed the scroll test, the term Scrolls has if you would have just rolled on by went that's stupid. Then you're then you'll be fine. I want to get into this whole like importing crap fail because our group is great guys so good and so good. There's been like maybe a couple mishaps, but which we've tried to address super quickly. Yeah, exactly. So we want to keep it rolling. Yes. Keep it good. Yeah. Keep it good. That was a really great. Great little story. Thank you for writing that out. And I'm actually loving that. We have the last bit of our Saga now the stroppy sisters. Do you want to mention why we're tying it all up this week because our next episode is going to be our Christmas episode is actually coming out on Christmas day is not adorable. We are awesome. We had that just right there and right. Yeah. Yeah. We totally guys totally timed that when we started the podcast a year and a half ago. So here you go. Now you're going to it's going to drop Christmas day. So that means you're going to wake up in the morning. Let your kids go open up the resonance or if you don't have kids grab a cup of coffee or if you're Jewish just come listen. Okay, fine and play because it's going to be Christmas themed. Don't worry. Yep. Yep, and we got you because the Jews don't do anything specific during Hanukkah and Christmas Day. Do they I think Konica is like eight days long so they probably have more latitude in their timing. Listen. It's Christmas Hanukkah. Uh Kwanzaa, there's got to be another one of the other ones. I know but it's all of it. The plan is makes a non-denominational winter solstice lovers. Listen make some time on your celebration day whenever it is and yeah, um listen to us and we'll tell you some festive stories. Yes about wedding Terror. Yes wedding horror. It's gonna be great. Yes and oddly enough. We had a Christmas story sentence. So I'm super excited. Yes. Oh, that's fabulous. I love it. Okay, awesome. So this is the last bit of our stroppy sister Saga. So we go for the meal and Gigi which you know is the sister that Golden Goose called and ghost. She's the one that I don't know gets everything done for her and yeah, yeah start snacking the free wine. Does that mean like drinking it by the bottle? Probably necking maybe I don't know. Can we get a British person? Yes, I need a translator. We had a lovely girl in our group. Yes. Shout out to you. I can't remember your name right now. Because it was just a random memory. I want to call you John but it's probably wrong. Anyway, girl in our group who is British and says, you know, she helped us figure out some of the wording. Yes some of the slang thank you in advance from these Canadians. So she's G start snacking this free wine. She goes I would like to point out that in my country. It is customary to have a free round of drinks for a toast and maybe also free wine with dinner, but after that guests pay for their own drinks all crazy like a cashbox. Yeah, I think in England it is All right, like not so much in North America. Although cash buyers are totally you know, we've discussed this in the past. Yes for sure. I didn't know that that it was like a thing. Yeah. It's a custom thing. I think in Europe. I mean let us know if it's not guys. Yeah, most people also get a glass of champagne on arrival. So by the time the cash bar kicks in everyone's had quite a bit to drink anyway, so they overestimate how much I think yeah. They overestimate how much I hate. You need not to come to Canada because I already drinks is nothing here. We are land of the open bar open bar proud and free. Yeah, but I mean Oh, Canada. I give my heart to thee. What is the one like for drinks in before? I'm like really? Yeah getting a good on. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so come to our weddings guys. Alice was actually now Alice is the bride. I think. Yes, this is weird. Alice was actually buying more drinks than normal as there was champagne on arrival free wine with dinner around for the toast and an after-dinner cocktail plenty of booze. I just think it's weird a bride buying her own drinks, but that's just weird. I think I bought me before more drinks all night, and I was up nearly till 6 a.m. Halfway through the meal GG suddenly leans over and Poor's half her glass of rosé wine into my glass of white. She claims. She's feeling Tipsy and needs to drink glasses. So even though I'm annoyed she ruined my drink, I'd be like cool more wine that kind of goes together. I'd rather that than have her fall down drunk next thing though the waitress with the wine arrives over and Gigi Downs was left of her glass and Ask for a refill at this point. I'm just confused and asked what the fuck she's doing at which point she launches into a tirade about how she is 22 years of age and I need to respect her and that she knows how to drink. So back off. Wow, uh-huh. I made the mistake of rolling my eyes and saying I know you can drink staying sober is the bit you can't do. Wow. That's amazing. What is the drinking age over there? I believe it's 18. Okay. Yeah, so by 22-year definitely. Yeah. And my expert fruity drinks hurt and Mom starts hissing at me not to be a bitch. Don't be a bitch. I pretend like I can't hear her. So she comes over and quote accidentally knocks my entire glass of white flash Rose a crap all over me. She laughs and makes out like it was an accident, but I can tell from the way she's looking at me that it wasn't these women are bitches all of them. Seriously. Oh my God, I go to the bathroom to dry off and on the way back I go to check on my partner in the kids. He as enlisted George's Aunt for help with the little one. Who's George do we know do Georges Georges is the groom? Oh George is the groom. I'm like, wait what? I just don't remember like from the other part. You know what? I'm right. So George is the groom. So he's Enlisted the groom's Aunt for help with the little ones and everyone's getting along great. We chat for a few minutes when he says, oh by the way, you might want to know I saw your dad with a bag of props earlier. Oh God, maybe never Never good bag of props what I know his speech is coming up and I'm panicking now because I can only imagine what he's going to say. I catch a glimpse of the speech as I walked past on the way back to my seat and the page number 2 of 23 catches my eye imagine 23 pages of a speech but with props to ya so he gets to act out in a sentence funny. So the speech time arrives and the father of the groom and best man make some lovely speeches at one point, Georgia. Is dad makes a joke about Alice having a single sister left and George having single brother left Gigi and Andy and that they should pair off. Oh, that was the one she was like putting her boobs out to the whole. Yes ride, right Gigi's face lights up. There you go. She then goes around for the rest of the night telling anyone who will listen that she's oh my God. So embarrassed the George's dad said that in his speech and now everyone knows that her nandi hooked up that one time even though they totally didn't nobody knew that and Allison George. We're not happy to find out. Oh, they did hook up that one time I guess. So, yeah, it's calling bullshit on him. Like I know. Yeah, I know can't believe it shit. They were really embarrassed at how she was acting and it was also really embarrassing for Andy because she told literally everyone she spoke to and he's quite a private guy sounds like a good combination. I'm yeah awkward as fuck for everyone involved then it's my dad's. Turn. Alice is squeezing my arm, so tight that I can barely feel my fingers. So I know she's nervous. He starts off. All right talking mostly about himself and his job where he is, very important. Did you know I love those features then he starts to talk about my sister as a child screaming for him when she woke up from tonsil surgery. Not quite how it went. She screamed when she saw him shit, it's Dad run. She's in the hospital bed bed. What do people feel the need to There's beaches just just be honest just be like congratulations. I don't know you that well, I love you. But by as kids if you were in bed and Dad came into the room, it meant you were getting beaten for something. Holy shit. She actually screamed because she just had tonsil surgery and thought her dad was going to beat the shit out of her. That's so sad. Oh my God, I can't laugh anymore. He started peppering the speech with overly flowery words for no reason. He used about five different. Over-the-top sentences to say that she was screaming then he went on to tell us some more stories about Alice except. None of them were real. He made jokes about her being drunk on her 21st birthday party, even though she was pregnant at the time and never got to have a party cool. He doesn't he's like making up memories. Yeah. He talked about him helping her study for a college exam because he's a professor and knows everything except she never asked him for help and did a beauty course while he teaches business which aren't even remotely. The same this whole family is a pile of shit. Like they're just a mess like the father's a pile of shit the mothers of pilot. They're all just giant steaming piles of crap. Okay, but can we agree on that first before we proceed? Well, I mean, I think they're a mess no giant piles of crap. That's like a whole other level of mess for sure piles of crap. It's I find it interesting though. Like I want to study them like primates in the jungle. A little Cajun could all hi-yah sure. They cook like this like what happened? What happened? I think we know what happened Dad but the mothers not cool either. So no, that's what he's probably a reason. There's like this friction everywhere, right? So let's just let's just agree. This is not a healthy family. No, no definitely not so dot also talked about how protective he was of us. He wasn't my god. Well considering you're beating your children are while he's beating them. Yeah, apparently my doing this for your own good. And how the first time he met George he scared him but eventually grew to accept him which was good because then they got pregnant so he had to marry her first off. Wow, that's cold. He had to marry her. That's yeah, she's not awful. Wow. Yeah, he doesn't know. I don't even know where to start with this. Yes. First off. I was the only family member who knew about George until after Alice became pregnant and secondly being pregnant doesn't mean George was forced to stay. He stayed because he loved her. Thank you. Thank you for saying that. That this is not a shotgun wedding. Yeah, everybody's going to start assuming this is a shotgun wedding. Yeah at this point mom started rolling her eyes and shaking her head and a few times even loudly side and mouth that never happened to the guests awkward then Dad made some comments about my partner not being allowed to marry me yet insisting we quote remain living in sin because don't forget. This is the third sister telling this story. Yeah. Yeah, right because he couldn't afford. Bride this year. He paid for nothing Al the Galan this guy hmm Alice even paid for the rental of his suit. He finished the speech by giving George a fire extinguisher quote for when Al it's Alex's turn to make dinner. Ha ha ha I hate when people are on that level awful quiet. Let them have their day leave her alone and taking a plastic penis giving it to Alice and telling George his testicles would be in her. Her handbag if he needed them. That's like next level what Dad does fucked up once it's completely insane like he went and bought that bought a dildo on goes. What is that for oats for my daughter's wedding and you know when he went bought it he was laughing to himself thinking he's so hilarious. This is gonna be so funny, which is so messed up. Not at all. Inappropriate. Like I mean, I have a very Dirty sense of humor at myself. Yeah, but not at a wedding. I'm never going to show up to my kids wedding would the dildo? Yeah from Daddy. Yeah, not good eventually. Thank God the speeches were done and dad went outside with a box of cigars to act like a big shot in front of other men, which is his favorite hobby. He sounds like he's the king of toxic masculinity to yes. Yeah, we breathed a sigh of relief because although the speech was bad. It wasn't as bad as we expected and we were nearly Done the first it wasn't that is the expected. I don't even want to know what wow. Wow Next Level. The first dance was next. And once we had finished dancing with the groomsmen Gigi was allowed to change. She looked ridiculous because she was dressed for a night in a club, but she was comfortable and complained less. So we let it slide. She's there like just shut up. We put the kids to bed had a few drinks danced a bit and had fun. Then we noticed how much she was blatantly hitting on George's Brothers cousins and Friends it was Berra cing but they all seemed well able to handle her. So he said nothing next thing mom comes up. All pissed off Dad is embarrassing her by acting quote like a freak. I find that so funny by the only now he's forcing her only now only know by this she means he's standing at the side of the Dance Floor staring at Alice and telling everyone around him how hard it is for him to let his daughter go right? Wow. Did he watch like every Wedding movie Father of the Bride. Yeah and just like I don't make it all I don't think Steve Martin had a dildo in that one. I almost feel like he's like a narcissist or something a massive nurses. Yeah, you'd be a psychopath to yes, and he's trying to look mimic what emoji and host like he doesn't know what he likes to do sociopath. Yes. Oh, I had a boss like that one time. Oh, well, I'll tell you one time. Maybe I'll tell you on the patreon. Yes. I'll tell you major because I don't want that. I don't actually want that like out there. Anyway, we'll talk about it later. Alice has noticed this too and is about ready to snap. So when dad comes up and asks her to dance she responds with no fuck off good for her. He looks like he's really a like that that's good for her. Yeah, but at the same time we are like dildo Rebecca. Wow, v-fib. I still don't think I could say no fuck off like that's aggressive. Well, where'd she get it from right? Right true. He looks like he's ready to kill her and so does mom so I laugh make a joke about how she's danced so much her feet are sore and quietly tell Alice to just do it before they kick up a huge scene she dances with him for a minute or two until he's happy. He's looked like a great father and then leaves again to smoke cigars. So the night goes on pretty well. Dad is making jokes about how he's filing for bankruptcy now because this cost so much Mom is telling everyone about her quote hair disaster that morning members. Air disaster. Yep, the fake hair disaster and Alice and I are doing ridiculous dance that we used to do as kids complete with arm flailing and Loud singing so the bar closes and most scariest sleeve but the bridal party the groomsmen and a few friends of Allison George's stick around at the residence bar. We were a bit tipsy singing Disney songs and the next thing GG yawns stretches her leg over George's older brother. Greg's knees and leans on his chest. She goes. Oh Greg my feet are so sore. From the day would you rub them for me? I'll make it up to you Winx. I would like to point out at this stage Greg is holding his girlfriend. Joanne's hand. They've been together for eight years Joanne and Greg are staring in shock. And Alice is livid and demands Gigi come to the bathroom with her to talk I go with them to try to calm Alice down, but it still ends in a screaming match where Alice tells Gigi. She is embarrassed by her behavior. And she wants an apology Gigi says Alice is the one who should apologize for screaming a GG when she did nothing. Wrong Alice says that she needs to grow up and that these people are her family now and she doesn't want to be embarrassed in front of them by Gigi's attention-seeking Behavior. Gigi calls her a bridezilla because which is the go-to, right? Yeah moment. You do something that she doesn't like your bridezilla and says that without the wedding dress Alyce is nothing Jesus. That's cold. Alice tells her to fuck off because that's what she does that night and which is totally fair in my opinion and Gigi. ABS the to love her dress and rips, huh? Oh, no, we were we all stand there in shock and Gigi storms off, but I think she even knew she had gone too far this time. I expected tears but Alice just looks sad and asked that I get rid of Gigi so she can enjoy her night. I went back out and Gigi was gone. I went back to tell Alice only to see Sarah the other bridesmaid crying in a corner being comforted by her boyfriend. Oh God. So what's drama so much Terror When I asked what was wrong, she told me Gigi had told her that Alice was livid at her for changing out of her dress. She had changed about two hours after Gigi. And Alice was fine with it. Once all the photos were taken. I had to explain that that wasn't true and send Alice out there to talk to her. Oh my God this poor bride eventually everything calmed down but the drama had kind of killed the fun. So we all went to bed the next day Alice refused to speak to Gigi. Mom pitched a fit about how she would quote not allow her child to be treated this way by a Ellis ignore it because she's the favorite, right? Yeah. Yeah ignoring the fact that Gigi was the cause of it all we were having a mall lunchtime after party in Mom's house that okay. That sounds amazing a mall lunchtime after party. Yeah. I don't know what that means. I don't know what that means but I liked it but it's at Mom's house. So it can't be an actual mall. Yes. I just like to point that out an after-party mom's house the next day after the wedding afterwards Alice was writing a thank-you list of the gift. She got and loudly said Golden Goose. Zeus no gift received. Wow GG then gave Alice and opened bottle of vodka and claimed it was their gift and that they were so rude. They shouldn't get a gift. I had brought it for the after-party and George doesn't even drink Vodka. She still refuses to speak with her. She didn't bring her a gift home from the honeymoon. I would hope not she ignores her when she comments on her Facebook pictures. It's great. I'd love it if she would go. And what's NC I'd love. Oh, I'd love if she would go and see which I think is non comunicados my going on comunicados much smoother. So I think she's saying basically like I want to go out of communication with her, and if she would just do it first it would make it a heck of a lot easier on me. Wow, bitches be crazy if there's any updates. I will update you guys in the new year. Thank you, but damn. Yeah. Yeah Sola takes the stress out of wedding planning with free wedding websites your dream wedding registry affordable save the dates and invitations and easy to use planning tools. You can conveniently manage everything online and in one place, so is Zola was around when I got married start your wedding planning with a free wedding website. It's so easy and takes just minutes to set up. 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Remember there's a lot this week. Yay. Thank you to William M hannassey Beck's s Helen V Carol F brand. Eh Ashley diiemma P&A me be the he went to patreon.com slash secret life of weddings to get more dirt more drama more llama more drama for the Llama. That's what I wanted to say. Yay, and if I missed you if I ever miss you, I'm so sorry like I do my best to keep up on the name. So, I hope I don't and we love you either way. So thank you so much for subscribing. I really appreciate it. And we do an extra half-hour episode every single darn week. We do early releases depending on what level you want to go to like there's so much fun. We do video behind the scenes videos with the preview sneak preview of a story coming up the next week. There's lots of fun stuff. So yeah, we're going to record a video of our Reda trip today. Yeah, which will be fun. So so since everybody's so invested. Yeah cruise control. Oh my God you guys we have an update. Oh shit. Now, I know some people know that what the update is because you know because they're there are drama whores. Yes, and they went and searched it out. But we've been sent this like 20 times in the last like two to three weeks like yeah, we hear you we are weird. Okay. Okay guys, thank you do it. Thank you. Thank you for sending it to yes. Thank you. Okay, the fucker has been talking to cruise control behind my back. Oh shit, and it's highlighted. No advice. Wanted we're keeping in mind. This is read it right. I'm going to bite my tongue right now. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, here it is. I thought DH is neutral spine had been cured he was so enthusiastic and agreed with everything. We said in couples counseling don't I have to say don't you hate that damn noodle Spike. It's a throwback. He he was so on board. He was coming up with a Diaz himself. He has been lying to me the Entire time he has a secret email account. Oh my God, he's been emailing her to keep her happy so that she won't go too crazy. Oh, no, I wondered why she wasn't escalating something seemed so off about it you all we fucking consulted lawyers about her. We wrote and sent a cease-and-desist kind of hard to take a scary letter saying stay away from us. Seriously when the person who sent it is violating it dude. This is like cheating. Yeah in a creepy ass way. I know it's his mom, but like this is but it's about the deception. Yeah, right. Yeah, it's as bad. He wrote an email to her warning her that she's going to get a scary letter in the mail but not to be freaked out. I was just hurt by the fact that she tried to get me fired and I needed to let my frustrations out. She tried to get her fired. Absolutely. I don't remember that there is a lot. She's posted a few things. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. You guys can go and read it because you a little much because it's so not it wasn't related to why that the wedding is at all. Yeah, it's just it's just their whole relationship. So active Rebecca sort of like laser focused in the cruise control Saga a little bit for you guys on the show. Yeah. Yeah, but there's like backstory and stuff. But for real if you just you can just go read it. Yeah. I really don't want advice. I also really don't want to be urged to cross post on another thread. I packed a bag and My parents I'm spending Thanksgiving with them. He's no longer invited. I also called my father-in-law and told him everything maybe that was petty of me. I'm just hoping that father-in-law can talk some sense into him and make him understand how supremely fucked his behavior is no kidding. I don't know what I want or why I'm posting I guess I just want some animal gifts and sympathy thrown my way. I thought you but I thought you said gifts and I was like, you just send me kittens nothing. Nothing, but boxes of kittens if I can make one request anyone have good book recommendations. I like historical fiction, but really hate sex scenes written down. I've been reading a lot of Ken as you stole it lately and his sex scenes are awkward as hell and I can't take anymore. I don't know we should cut the four books with no romance whatsoever. Not in the mood at the moment. Anyways, I left all that in for a reason. Okay. What's your reason? My reason being is that? I wish someone would would befriend this woman. Yeah, she needs a friend. She needs a friend. She does not need read it. No, she does not need the online Universe giving her advice because a she's not going to take it obviously and be she she obviously feels very lonely in her life. Yeah. So in that regard I feel bad for her and I know she said I don't know why I'm posting this and she's asking for book recommendations and stuff honey. Get a friend. Yeah, go have coffee the best thing and talk it out with them and he'll get a therapist if you need to and talk it out with them. Definitely because so far I get that you're writing it out of frustration. Yeah, but there's only so much that online comments can give you they can validate you a little bit, but it Cause you such anxiety. Yeah, I know but you but like the moment if I post something that's controversial and yeah moment someone comes up against me. I have like a fucking panic attack. Yeah, like going oh my God, I and I shouldn't care so much what other people think but I do. Yeah, so I don't know how that could be calming to her know like I get that maybe she feels a little less lonely and she's getting like support in some way but and I am not judging people who do this, but at the same time you need to go sort your life out. Yeah. Yeah, try to try to get some human contact but yes going to be and you know what it's so you don't it's so helpful to have a front. Oh, yeah. Okay. Can I just say like we all go through problems? Yeah. I've been MIA for a couple days. And you know what Lisa's been like my friggin Rock. So, you know y'all we all have shit that honest-to-god you need a friend to go through it with and if you can't find one look a little harder, seriously, that is some good. Face. Yeah, that is some good advice because what I was going to say is I was so before we start this podcast. I was so fucking lonely. Yeah, like it's so funny because if I can just get sappy her for a minute before Christmas. It's true. It's true though. No is true. And it's like I never had like Justin has this buddy his best friend and he they talk all the time every day. They always texting each other always, you know, yeah. About Records, or just stupid shit, whatever but I never had that like ever yeah, so I was always a bit jealous because not jealous just envious because I was always like, oh, I have a couple friends, but I don't really see them anymore. Yeah, you know from high school because you know, just your lives change whatever and I never had that and then we started this podcast and then it's like I had a reason to talk to you all the time. Yeah. It just became this natural like I have to tell Rebecca this I have yeah like and now we talk multiple times a day. Yes on the phone and text. Yeah, and it's amazing and I can't even describe how grateful I am for this friendship as I really can't like I feel like I could call you for anything cause I don't think I've ever had that yeah in my life. It's amazing. But I mean it I really am so I feel like you know, you girl there's only like a couple few people in my life like my parents, you know, obviously our parents I yeah, but like really in a pinch. I feel like I call. You and Justin. Yeah, you know, yeah. So anyway, that's just me talking. It's important guys it is make sure you have your your crew your yes, at least someone like someone needs someone to talk to like a real life people online are real but I mean a real life real assholes like a knee in front of you. Yes, and that talk to you fuckface time them if you have to but us just to talk at least on the phone like something they actually have and they have if you really can't though they have they have therapy. Now online which talks yes, I've heard about advertised on a log S. No, I haven't used it myself, but I'm just saying if you feel that you don't have a friend to turn to I'm pretty sure they can even do Skype sessions with you talk space. Yeah, Google that guys if you're looking for help of any kind, like a lot of people have seasonal affective disorder a little bit down around Christmas time and like there's no sun. Like I was way down on my vitamin D and feeling Wicked depressed and my doctor had to get me on some vitamin D. Yeah because like that can affect you so much. Especially with our Winters guys. Yes, my anxiety and stuff like so your cure my depression anxiety have been terrible lately and I just like I'm completely fine sharing that I'm glad you shared that people need to know that yeah, there's a real person behind this totally. It's so common. I have major like, you know Panic anxiety depression issues. Yeah, and the last like two months have been awful. My anxiety have been has been just out of control. So I was like changing up my medication a little bit happens and the good news is well. I don't not really I baby in front of you. I know you don't think you do but I don't think you could be yourself enough credit. Maybe I have no perspective on it. Right like yeah, that's me and my alone in my head. Yeah. I my symptom was I couldn't settle into anything. Yeah even stuff. I enjoyed I couldn't like sit on the couch watch Gilmore Girls or anything anymore. Like I could yeah, I would just start to think about to do something then just get depressed about doing it and not want to do it anymore. But I started on a new medication a couple days ago and it has made all the difference for me. So I just want to say like if you're going through that and You are on a vacation. It's not working anymore. Yep. Go talk to your doctor to get help it actually your body gets used to things and then you have to change it. And then even when I changed I was on the wrong one and I tried I tried to let it work. Yeah, I know they say it can take like eight to 12 weeks whatever but I told my doctor said, you know, I've never been like that. He goes, you know, it's rare but some people hyper absorb medication and right you are probably one of them and he goes, I've got two other patients like you they're both blond hair blue eyes. I was so funny. I said that Funny and I said, maybe it's a genetic thing because I said I'm very sensitive to pain. I'm very sent, you know, blue eyed. People are sensitive to light. Yes. Maybe we're just more sensitive. Yeah roll and he said yeah, that's probably probably right on my pain thresholds fucking massive. No, you have dark drives them. Whoa boys you blew I thought they were kind of like greeny blue know you do blue baby blue blue blue. So you know what? Fuck that then I guess I'm wrong. No, you're probably right. I don't know. I'm a whim of all I'm a Love with pain. I was like three centimeters dilated with my baby and I was like pump meet. Give me the fucking needle right now. I need it. I don't care if it's an epidural or heroin at this point. Just put it in my arm back or wherever the fuck you put it and dose me because I can't do this. Like I don't know how women have babies. Yeah, I've had to and I don't know how they do it. Yes, but you did it. I didn't know because I was drugged the shut the fuck up like I don't know I couldn't no no, I couldn't do that. Yeah. Anyway, our Reddit wrap for this week Rebecca. Yeah, it wasn't so much the wedding that went wrong. It was the reception that's a big part of the one where immediately after the speech is and just before the couple Cut the Cake the bride's younger sister was called out by her boyfriend of about six months from what I gather who then proposed to her in front of everyone now as bad as that was it wasn't the highlight. You know our opinion about that right guys, we're not we're not really big fans of that. We actually just did a YouTube video about top re telling that story about when the best man. Yeah, she and proposed and I was bad. Yeah, that was bad. So that wasn't even the worst part. It wasn't the Highlight I should say that would have been the bride pulling her sister aside to have a few heated words along the lines of what the fuck do you think you're doing which then became a heated argument which then turned into a full-blown fist. between the pair of them one of the theme of this episode I think is fist women is so much anger how much hanger so much hate it became a full-blown fistfight between the pair of them. One of the venue staff must have called the police because that night ended with the bride absolutely fucking covered in blood her sister had got in a really good shot that burst her nose like a bag of crisps being trodden on by a fat bloke though the that made the stew. He's so much better. Oh my God and her sister with to obviously knocked out front teeth being arrested for assault and causing the affray. Amazingly the couple are still together some 15 years on I have no idea if the Sisters still talk though crazy pretty great. That's something else. Right? Can we can we finish with our chitchat now sure yay. Let's do it. So I don't remember what it was to be me. It was gonna be you have a rant and then I have a Jill style. So do you want to start with your rant and then I'll end on the Jill story because it's just a little it's very short surely surely sure but it's sort of like a funny little okay from her, you know, so of course wearing wedding groups, right at most people are especially people getting married or wedding vendors like us wedding photographers a topic that keeps repeating itself is Disappointment with wedding photos. So yes, we've given advice And have said to hire professional beaten this to death your disappointment in your photos is terrible. We acknowledge that we do not want anyone to be unhappy with their photos, but that's not today's issue. No, so what hey, what is today's your so it's like pee first going into these groups and being like I hate my wedding photos. I II honestly I'm not joking with you guys and I tell my clients this I would fucking cry and probably closed my business if It was truly disappointed with the photos. I break our hearts like it really wet. I don't it's not just you know, clicking a button it. I'm actually we actually put ourselves into this like I really do you guys are taking a piece of me away with you want to like like we're quite literally sometimes reflected in your eyes. Yes during the photo. Yes, if you zoom in close enough. Yes, like it's we really do take a lot of pride in our work we care. Yes first you all please. Out that a great photo like the most amazing photo in the world will not fix your insecurities. No, that's perfect. Yes. Thank you. Okay. It doesn't matter how good your photographer is. It doesn't matter how great the photo is. It doesn't matter if it the photo won awards we cannot fix your insecurities. Okay. So if you hate your arms, yes, I'm just going to pick a really common. Yep common complaint from from people. That was like, I hate my arms and all these photos. Yep, then Wear a dress that doesn't highlight your arms. Maybe don't maybe don't go strapless go with something with sleeves which is so beautiful and elegant. Yeah or even a shrug or like something to break up the line of the arm. Yes, because dude, I'm a queen of hate my arms. I would not do that. Yes, you know what? I mean? I get it. I re-read your view of yourself in the mirror and your view of yourself in a photo are different. Yes. Can you know why this is psychologically I go ahead. No, you tell no no, go ahead. It's interesting because we don't like how we look in photos because we are flipped visually in our brain. Yes. So you see yourself. Our face isn't everything or not symmetrical. Yeah, even though it kind of looks symmetrical. They're actually not know. So if you look at your face in the mirror, you think you look one way you're going to automatically like a photo better of yourself, if you just take a photo of yourself and flip it. Yes and look at it and you'll like it better. Yeah, it's a weird trick, but you it'll look more like yourself to you. Yes, because that's how you see yourself every day. Yes, exactly. So so, you know when you're I noticed like a lot of brides especially, you know, trying on wedding dresses and whatnot. And a lot of the times they're picking dresses based on how the dress looks and not how the dress looks on them. Yes, and I'm not knocking anybody that does that but we're when your bag if you want when you attach to your photographer after the fact and say, oh I was bulging here or bulging there. Can you get rid of it? Well, It's not our responsibility. No, it's not and of course I will but I mean, you know, she gets taken advantage of I totally do queen has dried onions these problems before your photographs actually like they bother you you don't go into it saying. Oh, I'll just get them to photoshop it no. Oh my God, if I hear that one more time, it's guess what everyone else that that wedding that's taking photos of you. You're going to hate. Yeah, you will. Can I just say though if you think I'm going to sit there and Photoshop every single photo from your wedding to fix something? That's not my fault hell to the no. No, I'm sorry. We do not get paid enough for that. No, I'm sorry. I know you guys think we get paid a ton and we really do not get paid enough that I know. It's a lot of work the amount of hours that go into one client. Yeah, it's shocking. Yes, so I don't even want to know and some people are making them out. They're charging this like less than minimum wage. Yeah, so I don't even want to hear it. Yeah. Can I be bitchy for a minute? Yeah wedding photography. I'm in it. I don't really want to hear it. Because it's not our fault and we're just expected to fix all these problems. Oh, can you fix this? Can you fix that and don't get me wrong we do our best and we go bend over backwards to make our clients happy. So sometimes when we feel we have to yeah, so if there's something that you tried your best and you didn't mean for it to happen or whatever offer to pay the photographer to fix it. That's--that just 10 times out of 20 or more than that. They'll probably say I'll fix this money for you for free or I'll do ya the bat You want for free because we just really care that much. But please don't expect it. Yes, you know, it's like walking into someone's house and expecting a meal. It's like you would walk into a restaurant and pay for a meal wouldn't you you'd ask if you could buy a meal you would expect them to feed you a prime example. I just had a client message me and unfortunately their dog passed away and they had done one of my family many sessions that I did like three years ago. Sure. Okay, so they came back and they at that time they had not selected I took Few photos of the dog alone and they had not selected that as part of their photos that they chose sure. So she was wondering if I still had them and I did and she offered she's like just let me know how much it is. Yeah, and and I was like, you know what Merry Christmas there you go. So sorry for your loss, you know, but I appreciated that she offered yeah, you know, I mean because I did take the time to go a look for the photos which three years ago. I had to go Diggin. So with how much quick more quickly were you to be like, please have it and Merry Christmas. - yeah, cuz she offered exactly. Hey. Yeah time I was like don't worry about it though. Good. It's just respect. Yeah, that's all. Yep. So to everyone who shows respect to their vendors and we've had a lot of amazing Brides. Yeah saying that they are, you know, loving their vendors trying to give us break showing us respect and love thank you. Yes. Thank you. You are the change that we wanted to see and we just appreciate it. A lot of people didn't understand. Yeah, and I hope that just chatting about it has really opened up some eyes, too. Kind of just how bad the job can be and again be wonderful to but it can also be really tough. Yeah, so thank you for listening to us. Yes. And so to finish that first point we can't fix your insecurities. Okay as much as I'd like to I'd love to I would love to just fix my own show you how beautiful I see you. Yes, but you know what? I mean like Oh, and it sometimes is beautiful women usually guys to don't get me wrong guys have been introduced to me. But let's let's be honest. It's the bride's yeah. Much that are hating themselves in these photos charts, which is so sad because you're not you're never more beautiful than you are in your wedding day because yeah the happiest day of your life. Yes, and I get it because I don't like my photo taken asked Lisa. Like I despise I hate myself for photos, but you're beautiful you're at the same time. I'm not going to blame the photographer for how I look yes. Yes because I've actually had one of the best in the world take my photo. So that's very, yeah, right. Yeah, so and I was still like I know I was like you look fucking beautiful. No, no and but that's on me. That's not on him. Anyways, second Point your photographer. This is a big one. I know you're going to chime in on this because you're going to be like fuck your photographer gives you the best photos the best. I'm going to repeat it. They give you the best photos from the day. Yes. Okay. Thank you. We professionals do this sometimes every weekend. We know what we shot. We know what we worked out. We know what we did in to. Yes, we know. What was what Turned out and what didn't okay, we know that we didn't make a mistake and not giving you a photo. Maybe we took a shot and it didn't turn out to be great. The only time I would say there's a caveat with this is yes, if there was something that was really particularly photographed like a family formal grouping or something. That's because there has been yeah rare time in 11 years when there was a glitch with my upload or something and see if it was legit missing. Yeah, but if you just think there's quote Oh just more from that location or more yallah, please don't what I'm talking. It's the worst I said now as creative professionals, we are artists like just putting out there. We are artists are like it's the same thing. If you asked a painter, why didn't you paint that color the yes, exactly. Well, then I didn't think it'd look good. So we get to choose what we deliver to you. That's just part of it. That's that's that's just part of you have to release that can be yes. Exactly. You should trust we have given you the best and the best ones and that they pass not only like artistic eye, but are very Critical eyes. Oh, yeah, like we're very critical of your photos. Trust me. You're way more picky. Yes. Yes. Yes I said so even just a white balancing. Oh my God. How often have you sat there in your life and looked at something and went I don't know about that skin tone and oh giving a shit about it and they won't care. Yes, they won't notice because to anybody to the outside world. You guys don't see it how we see it. So we're very very picky we can tell if it's like five points to magenta like, it's crazy what? Yes see in color. So my fucking Beef is with people in wedding groups telling other people that have gotten married and got their photos back. I'll ask your fatigue or go ask your photographer for all the photos. No hard know. Usually we delete them 80% of the time. Your photographer will say no that is horrible advice. Okay, guys, this is this off you've first of all the second I get that email. Let me tell you unless I've missed like Lisa said a family Formal or something that's missing from your gallery. I completely understand that. But if you're asking me to give you five different versions of the same photo, I'm going to give you a hard. No. Yeah guys, they are out of focus. You blinked. It wasn't a sharp. You didn't look as good. There's a reason we didn't give them to you. Yes, some photographers such as Lisa shoot really shallow. Okay, so to get that exact precise I have to do like phone and focus. Yeah of that shot that she wants for you. Exactly. Like she said she's taken 10 me alone. I shoot you have to get the expression. I don't shoot. Yeah, I don't shoot as shallow as you do but even at my 3.5 that I generally hover around guys, that's not an entire photo in Focus. No, you guys need to understand that we're not doing this intentionally. So we're not holding your photos hostage know so it was driving me nuts because it kept coming up in groups and I was like, no this is not a stop. Yeah. Okay. You have a platform to talk about it. Yeah. We just want to it's Gotta stop. I'm giving you we are giving you the Best advice possible a unless there's something truly important missing from your group of photos. Don't ask your photographer. Please don't don't if you are unhappy with your photos talked I'm going into groups and bitching about it and talk to your photographer honest to God. We actually give a shit a big shit. Yes, if you're not happy. I want to know. Yeah, I really do Lisa. I swear to God I do like I want to know I don't want to know but I do want to know yes, I don't I don't want it. I'm like, yeah, I don't break our heart. Yes. Don't don't do it lightly but it really is breaking your heart. Try to be reasonable. Yeah, and try to be logical. Yes and say be understanding like yeah, you didn't give them enough time and you know, you didn't give them enough time. Don't hold them to a standard as if they had like two additional hours. That's exactly that's not fair now, but just be constructive and just say, you know, I know we were limited on time or I know we had these challenges. I just wondered how we can make this work, you know and seek because they'll probably know. If there if you're not going to be happy, no, not all yes, but sometimes you know, we kind of might know because there was other problems or hiccups in the day. Yes, they may sense it already. Yes. So just be nice just be human because honestly when my day is when my time is cut short, oh, was it a couple of do you know who hears about it Lisa? Yep, and I'm like fuck. Yeah. She's like, I know I had like five minutes with them and I was like, yeah, I do a minimum of an hour, you know, like what I request. Well, I These things that's why it's all my contract I request this amount of time. And if you don't give it to me, I'm no longer responsible. We're not liable for it. Yes, because guys ate it takes us a good but five-time is just to warm you up and get you could calm down off this huge higher on right also to get the maid of honor to stop talking to you and you're talking and people just stop giving you directions and telling you what to do and how to do this oftentimes. I take couples away from everybody all I can't stand it when people start to direct. Yes my clients. Yeah, just Stop, please. So if you know that your we need time to work. Okay, so but my whole point was stop it in the fucking groups giving this horrendous advice. Yeah, I'm done with it. We're not the magic well of photos no work. That was not an Ender never-ending pit is it's a fucking pit we've gone through every one of your goddamn photos. I'm getting that sometimes all 5,000 of them. Yes that I've shot them. Yes much, you know, we're going through thousands of photos not all of them are. It okay, and it's not that oh, well you and a lot of them said well what I think is good what they think is good as two different codes. No, it's just not know. There is a standard that has to be met blinking is pretty do you think out of focus is pretty do you have looking like you're going to sneeze is yeah because these are the things we're cutting out or duplicates. Yes, or when they will nail the photo and it's the same damn picture if they have any great change even on talking like big smiles a little smile. I tend to deliver quite Loosely. Yeah, and I will give both Both, yes. Yeah, cuz I'm like terrified you won't love them. So it's lie over deliver myself. Me too. Yeah. Yeah, you know, I got all the chakras do guys though. So, you know, that's a healthy question to ask that when you're when you're scouting your photography. Yes. How many photos can I expect that's a normal question which I would encourage because then you have an expectation. Yeah, and because there are some photographers incredibly talented ones. I'm not one of them. Yeah that can shoot like 400 exposures in a wedding day and deliver 200 killer images. Yes. Not that decisive. No, I will deliver 800, you know, yeah. Yeah exactly. Yeah ask because you know what your friend got in a photographer what you get are two completely different things. Exactly. We're not all the same. We don't all wear artists. Yes. Yep. Yeah. It's like comparing painters. I was just going to say that again Van Gogh and Monet. Yeah, like yeah not even close. But yeah, I don't know how to put a stop to the bad advice going around wedding groups, but it's starting to drive me nuts. Well people listen to when we were talking about Yeah, wedding vendors and how we get treated and yeah wedding vendors are saying like they're getting treated better as a result. So maybe this will help a little bit in the post-production and I know you guys think it doesn't hurt to ask. Yeah, it does actually purposeless. Seriously. It stresses us out. My husband gets so stressed. Oh my God, I miss like you know what? I mean? Yeah, and then we started out goat. Yeah, we start to go back through and then we start to stress and then we stir like a like there's a legit reason. Like I said, you're missing a family formulas I know was taken in her. Yep, something really special. Yeah asked by all means but yes if You think it's just an artistic decision? Maybe just don't bust their balls. Yatch or I know we took when facing this way. Not that way like guys it's because it didn't work out. Yeah. Okay, I gotta go. Let it slide Let It Go There You Go. Perfect. I have a young daughter. Can you tell speaking of young daughters? Yes, let's hear it. I want to finish off this episode with just a little Jewel anecdote. Mmm. It's as you know, my daughter Jill. She's almost 5:00. She's a little firecracker. She is a firecracker. I like it and she's funny. She is funny. So the other day were hanging out and I think I think I was putting her to bed and I was talking about. Oh, I know what I know. I wasn't putting her to bed. We were sitting down here in the living room. And she was saying about Liam she goes he's gonna he's not going to move out and I said like her father her brother is like six. Okay, so like Don't know why she's talking about this but she is and so I go no, she's so far beyond her years. Oh, yeah, he does. He's not the move out. I said, he's gonna move out. He's gonna grow you said. Oh, yes, he is. He's gonna grow up and move out and go to university or whatever go to college and get a job. And yeah do all that she goes. Well, I'm never going to move out. I'm gonna live here forever. I'm gonna die when you die. Thank you. Okay, I couldn't believe she's I was like that's so creepy and touching it without any time. How did you not go? Oh I get it. Yeah broken heart syndrome. I like that is you know broken hearts it like I'll die when you die was Yang. I would just want to say that just to see if she got it because I feel like she would understand but she's probably would understand but she's like so fucking crazy. She's but the best part is she looked me right in the eyes dead in the eyes and yeah because I'm gonna die when you die. Her delivery is like crazy. Oh is perfect. Yeah, it was Perfection. Yeah. I just I've had that in my head like to do I have to tell Rebecca that that's funny. It was so good. Oh my God, that's amazing was so good. Thank you for hanging with us. Yeah, it's been great. Yeah, so good and Rebecca anything can happen at weddings, and we will be here to tell you all about it. Well, that's it for us this week on The Secret Life of weddings podcast if you need more drama in your life go over to patreon. Dot-com secret life of weddings to sign up for additional weekly episodes. The first few episodes are free. So go check it out patreon.com slash secret life of weddings, and we will see you here next week.
SKIPPERS - jump to 18:06 to begin the stories! Our 10 minute rule has been voted out by you guys! Instead we are giving you a timestamp of when the stories begin. We tell the conclusion to The Shallow Sisters Saga, a story about a reception proposal fight between 2 brides, a dramatic Cruise Control update & why you shouldn’t ask your wedding photographer to “fix” your imperfections in your photos or ask your photographer for “all the photos”. Christmas Yard Waste Bag Video - https://youtu.be/sUNS933WtNc Christmas Crack Recipe - https://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/christmas_crack/ Want more Secret Life of Weddings? Become a Patron for as low as $3 a month & support the show at http://www.patreon.com/secretlifeofweddings This episode is brought to you by Zola, the world's most kick ass, free wedding registry & planning website! To start your free wedding website and also get $50 off your registry on Zola, go to http://zola.com/secretlife To share your story, please email secretlifeofweddings@gmail.com or visit http://secretlifeofweddings.com *Join our private Facebook listener group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/1294161840712617/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/secretlifeofweddings/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/secretlifeofwed Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/thesecretlifeofweddings Tumblr: https://secretlifeofweddings.tumblr.com YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/secretlifeofweddings Reddit: http://reddit.com/r/secretlifeofweddings --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/secretlifeofweddings/support 