Security is always like I hate these life coaches. He's 20 year old life coaches there. What? Can you possibly teach me 20 year old life coach, right? He probably had that voice in the back of your head. No, I'll tell you something. I didn't have that voice in the back of my head. I had that voice literally talking to me because in episode 33 or 34 of askgaryvee way back I sent in the clip and it got featured and the video is called personal branding something something out on a previous Gary. My name is Rafael I run the Personal development YouTube channel. My question to you is what would you do if you were starting over and building your personal brand all over again? Basically getting the name Gary Vee out there all over again in this day and age, what would you do to go out there and really spread the word and to get yourself known? I love this question and boy I'm going to set up do I have a really good answer for this because you and thanks for the question and every other youngster needs to hear this really really loud. Clear and this is not being disrespectful because I was a 22 year old genius business person in my mind because of what I did but I would do exactly what I did which is for the first 10 years of my professional career. I didn't say a damn thing. And in that clip Gary V shows me asking for personal branding advice and then he ripped me a new one and I got directly torn two little pieces like and it was the best thing ever been, you know, the thing was at that stage. Age I already had a successful business that probably just hit six figures I think around that time and I already had a bunch of clients that love me and actually on that video on Facebook and I think on the YouTube videos well people stepped in and we're like, you don't actually know Raphael like he's actually really good and he gets results and he's awesome. And you know, you shouldn't assume all of this just because he's young that's kind of really silly like he has like, I think at that point, I probably already had at least a thousand hours of coaching them if not more which is more than even Let our certified and 50 years old starting life coaching so as interesting, but yeah, it was a tough one because in the beginning in the very beginning before Gary Vee that thing wasn't such a big deal because I had already got the experience. But before that family friends, you know, when I started just saying look you're you're you're you don't know what you're talking about. Like you have no experience go to school get a job and then you can start doing this stuff and the truth is the market doesn't care and you'll hear you will hear Gary say this. Stew and you'll hear all the business girls say this the market does not care. Here's what the market cares about. Do you have value? Can you solve a problem? Can you help somebody for real? Can you sell can you sell if you cannot sell you cannot deliver, right? So you need to know all those things. I built those skills. I got paid. It's that simple. So, how old are you? How old were you when you decided to become a coach 1818 right? So you hadn't gone to college you just knew that you know what this is what I want to do. I want to help people live. Our lives right? I mean when I was 18, I got into self-improvement really deep. I was already into it when I was 16, but at 18 I decided this is something I want to do with my life and I had done an exchange student here in the UK. I'm from Norway. So I traveled over there basically left all my friends everything. It was crazy. It's a felt like a really big deal at the time you can imagine you're like 16 years old and 16 17. And so I went over there, you know for met my soul mates basically amazing my girlfriend been together for six years. And yeah that time I mean it's it was just it was like knowing that this was something that really resonated with me and there was something powerful. It was the most it was the thing. I was most excited about and that's how you know, it was a joy and that's when I decided yes, this is something I just knew I like self-help. That's what I knew and I started getting coaching I paid for it. I didn't have the money. I've worked the job as a janitor when we came back to Norway together. It was embarrassing like my friends new family new. This is what I was doing to pay. For the coaching and pave to build my brand and so I paid my dues for sure like and I paid them hard and I lived on very little and yeah, I sacrificed solutely. Absolutely. So how was it for you? I mean you're this kid right trying to build a coaching business. You're you're cleaning the floors in your school where you went to you and you're talking to people about success, right? How did you go through that? Because I'm sure that people were like, are you crazy? Like, don't you? Don't you see your life, but how can you talk about success when you're mopping floors in the school? Good question. Yeah, I mean I wasn't talking about success. I wasn't talking about being famous or making millions of dollars. I never pretended to be someone I'm not I didn't lie or bullshit people and that's the big thing. You know, I didn't go. Oh, I'm the expert. I never said that. I just made videos based on questions that people were asking right. I just looked up stuff on forums and I was like, oh people need help with this like, let me try it. Yeah, you know and then I saw questions and comments of like a video that was popular and I would reply that was me every day. Why would look I actually cared about the people it wasn't like. Oh, hey look at me. I'm a life coach know if people get the wrong impression and I think that's probably why you know someone like Gary prejudged it because you didn't realize like I was coming from humbleness. I wasn't trying to be the authority. I was building my personal brand in a way where hey look if you need help with something. Let me try my best. That was me. All right, and then not one of them not one expert now people pay me a lot of money. Now, you know companies will pay me huge sums to work with them. I have clients that will fly me out. You know, I've spent 30 days with the client and person he cracked seven figures with his real estate company like crazy stuff, you know, amazing amazing clients. I like I love working with them. You know, I worked with the guy that runs the highest-rated dog training company in the United States incredible incredible people like amazing, but at that time I wasn't working with those people at that time. I Working with you know, someone who needed accountability in going and doing their meditation and you know reading and that was my Niche it was like accountability coaching. So I wasn't trying to say hey, I'm an expert. I know everything I was more like hey, you know what you should be doing but you're not doing it. Let me help you do it. That's it. I'm not going to pretend that. I know what's right. I'm just going to help you do what you're doing. I'm going to help you stick to your word. That was my phrase. I was like I help you actually do the things you said you would. With that was it? Yes. I'm I'm not the expert. I'm not you got it. I'm not telling you that I know because I don't but I know that you know, and I kind of know so let me help you do it and that's it. Isn't it? Isn't that kind of what a personal trainer is? I love that so much. I love that so much and um, you know, I've personally been guilty of kind of know my girlfriend is like no you never did that. You never position yourself as something to you. But I feel that I kind of did it, you know that I know I felt that I needed to position myself as knowing more than I did. Yeah, just to kind of compensate for a while I discovered is exactly what you're saying, like instead of positioning yourself as this expert allowing yourself to be vulnerable and saying look, I don't know everything. You know, what you need to do. I'm just here to help. Let me help. I love that. I love service service service not expertise coaching is a relationship business. It's Not about doing a funnel stop your clickfunnels. Okay, I'm sorry. This is controversial but it's true cancel your subscription cancel your website cancel all your social media. And here's what I want you to do. If you want coaching clients talk to people talk to them genuinely care about them see what they need help with and if you think if you have the audacity to think that in some way you can maybe help them a little bit offer them a free one hour two hours three hours session where you just give give Give give give give and I know this is controversial because you should have the funnel but if you're starting out and that's what you're asking me don't do any of that. It's stupid. It's still even today people don't like being sold stuff just give value build a relationship show that you can genuinely contribute and now hey, would you like to you know, would you like to work with me? It does this is this nice. Do you like this? And that's humble? It's not being an expert. Hey, okay, let's do this now Visa or Mastercard like the you know the card own clothes or whatever and I love it like it's great stuff. Get me wrong sales is awesome. But you've got to have context and you've got a build value for real not pretend to build value on the video where you say. Hey, I'm the expert and listen to me. I never did that. I only leverage real stuff that I actually did now because people would still think like oh, who is this get right so I'm like, okay, I'll leverage it a little bit. But even then I stay away from it. Like I could easily drive a fancy sports car and I don't I could have easily bought a cash cash. Not not leasing it. Mr. Internet marketer. I Buy it straight. I don't have a problem. Right I was gonna you know, I was going to do that and then I realized that's silly be authentic, you know do this real stuff and that's you know, don't be one of these guys because I hate that stuff. It's so it's so obnoxious and you're just fronting and you're trying to look cool ever have like somebody teach you a coach who in sales saying that you need to close immediately like these qualifying questions and then immediately closed the person get the money and then they're coaching them. Yeah. Yeah, I III do that now sounds sounds contradicting right but no I had people tell me that right from the gecko. It's a mistake. And once you have value you can do it. I can do that now, I don't have to talk to anybody who can afford to work with me. What's the point right? But I'll still do it. I still give the value calls. I still did why because it's a mindset of being in relationships. And I sometimes I do a straight sales call. Like let's say I have a high-end client, you know, he's paying 10K a month and he says look I got this guy, you know, he wants to get a coach and you're the Last guy I mean I've ever worked with and I've had like seven different coaches. So, how about this? How about you work with them? I say yeah. Okay. Tell him to call me or tell him to email me. So I make him reach out to me and then I set the call and I'll probably close in that call. Why because I have leverage I have positioning. I have all these things and I don't need to do this anymore because the values already built. The person is already sold for I don't lie, but if they don't have that context, you can't sell stop selling with your clickfunnels thing someone watch two videos of yours, and then you're like, I'm Looking for three more of my dream clients sure. You are and everybody else, right? Okay. Yeah, I'll click on your schedule and then they talk to you and they just know you're full of it and nobody wants to buy that actually build relationships with you. If you're new, if you have a lot of experience, you know, if you've been working for me like five years, you know coach AB 9,000 hours of coaching logged 9000. Okay, you can charge straight away if you really want to and even now I'm reluctant. I still do the free calls. I still don't close a lot of the time I leave so much money on the table. Well, and you know, I learned that from from people like Gary like just leave money on the table and be a nice person. Guess what later on you'll make more. Hey, just wanted to hop in here and say that if you're enjoying my videos and you would like to take your life to the next level. I invite you to hop on a free 30-minute call with me by going to ring Raphael.com. If you want to speak to me personally and get a customized strategy and game plan and some real advice to help you progress and really Grow tremendously exponentially again, just go to ring Raphael.com. That way you can schedule our session and I can talk to you very very soon. This is stuff that you learn from a lot of people but and I don't personally think it's wrong because it really worked for them. It has to do a lot with you character and just trying different things and figure out what is your profile prefer style and I like this idea a lot but the rationale behind this type of selling for everybody listening in is that if you give too much value on the call, then the person will feel like they got the solution to their problems and then they're going to say, you know what I know what I need to do I do. To hire you that's like they're thinking in the back of their heads and you're not going to apply anything because they didn't sign up for your coaching. You know, what let me tell you something. Let me bust that myth right now total BS. Here's why because if you're really a good coach you can make someone invest emotionally and you without them paying you a single dollar hundred percent. You know, why because look at look at somebody who's big and and on social and watch how many thank you messages they get from people that never even got coaching from them watch the video when an implemented and became a millionaire. Now I have those people. I have people that email me that they never even got a session. So you're telling me if you get one-on-one with somebody you can't get them a result. They invested their time. What's what kind of bullshit is that like, I'm sorry, but it's true. It's just an excuse for you to try to sell all the time. It's just a rationalization to say oh you need people to pay right away and the truth is in coaching. It's a relationship and if you don't have a relationship, you don't have no money and even if they buy from you, they'll know one month two months three months my clients. Stay with me for four five. Years. Listen to me. I really want this to click for people. I don't go through churn rate. I don't have O next month. I need to get five new people because oh my God my list isn't I keep people because I really really really get results and that's all that matters. And so of course, there are people that will take that free call and do nothing with it. Even though you poured it on even though you tried to get them to connect. Yes, but it's a small price to pay. Oh, yeah doesn't really really matter. What was your some of your biggest challenges in? The beginning. Yeah, I mean just the fears the limiting beliefs you know it for sure. I mean, you've probably gone through it yourself like you just you maybe you feel like an imposter. So it's about instead of what I say is don't try to just get over it. That's what people will tell you on the internet. That's like Get over yourself and just do it. Anyway, no change the approach to what feels real and authentic. That's what I did instead of just getting over it like condition yourself for Success. Incantations are great. I love Romans I use but I make it normal. I don't make it weird. I don't make it weird to get a client because if it's weird to get a client then then now you're reaching and if you're reaching nobody wants to work with you. Can you describe that? Why would you what do you mean like we're to get a client right? It's because you're not bringing enough value. It would be if you don't do you know if you try to close on the first call, it feels weird you ever had a tension where it's like you try to close and it doesn't any are like and now you gotta handle objections. That's when you messed up. I'm not saying don't have an objection so you can still use Those skills but if there's a lot of resistance you might say. Oh, it's that other person ask yourself this how well do they know me? First of all, have they been watching for a year? Because if that's get it that's the case. Okay, then you should probably close but if the case is they watch like three videos got on the call because it was free and now you're trying to you know, get them to commit $5,000 a month. Hmm. I wonder what's wrong, you know like yeah. Oh, yeah, just close like okay sure. It's interesting. Yeah, it's just like getting Day, like the person who's never met you and you're like, whoa, do you want to get married? Yeah. Yeah. Let's just do it now. Yeah, and they're like, you know, I'd like to get to know you better first and then you go. All right. I'm goin to Jackson handle this. Yeah, you're like actually I agree with you. I'm on your team. But however consider this if we get married now, you'll get half my net worth. How does that sound? Like oh my God, what are you doing? It's ridiculous love that. I love that. How did you overcome like all of the leaves that you initially had about yourself? And you know how the world should be. I mean guys the fling go and check out Rafael's YouTube channel, and I know he's probably not gonna like it but go scroll down watch his first video watch his first because you know, why? No, I because I love it so much. Because you're gonna see two totally different people, right? Yeah to like you're going to see Raphael starting out and you can it's not only that there's no absolutely no light in that video, right? You are actually in the process of allowing the light from your heart to shine through more in your life and you see like a total difference, but you just started out. Yeah. No, absolutely. I mean, you know, the thing is honestly like it's just practice right you're not Good at something when you start and so that's the whole thing about trying to be an authority. That's the whole thing about impostor syndrome. That's the whole thing about beginning as a coach. You know, you're just not you're not good. And so you just got to work at it. And so you're right. I was being authentic to who I was then I was tryharding. I mean you can see on the video. I'm like, all right, fucking blah blah blah, you know, I'm like swearing and being weird. It's like really awkward. I've never done. Oh, no never. Oh, yeah. You're right. Yeah, I know. It's you know, you're all doing it. Yeah, that mean exactly and I even do it now. What am I above it now? I'm not above it. I still do weird stuff that makes no sense. I was you know, I just hired like a bunch of people and my team is expanding on my business is growing. It's amazing. But what I was doing before it was so stupid. I was like trying to you know, do everything myself like, oh, let me do the Facebook post and let me do the YouTube and let me do you know LinkedIn and Instagram and do this not now I have team members. As for each platform and then I just manage and train them and it's like you just do dumb stuff people do dumb stuff and then you learn hopefully you have enough awareness to notice that you're being stupid or you know, God forbid you actually hired a coach right and they actually helped you go. Hey, here's how you're being an idiot do this instead and then you're going to be happy and fulfilled and you're going to do well who would've known right people starting out and you know who are trying to build the and select their audiences. How did you select your audience? And how do you find topics? You videos great question. Yeah, I think it's actually fairly easy. You just look at who you can help the most instead of trying to think here's my ideal client because they have the money which is the biggest mistake. Everybody makes I'm gonna go Target six-figure earners and coaches because they have money so I'm going to teach them how to get clients, but I've never gotten them myself. I hate that so much. It makes me feel sick to my stomach. I'm sorry. It's just it's yes, but if you know how to help them awesome if you don't don't do it, you know. Just do something else. But if you are doing it and you're successful great, maybe if you're gonna do that, here's my suggestion. If you want to Target a high ideal client and you think that's who you can help the most and they have more money to spend and what are you can charge them or don't charge them or right away charge less be humble. Give service get results work your ass off like legitimately and then they will praise you and talk about you and you'll get infinite clients. So the focus is not so important to say who you're going to help based on your ideas. What you think the market needs it's get out of your head and start talking to people and say what's your biggest problem in your life? What are you struggling with asked five friends and maybe out of them. You can identify one person that would be perfect to work with maybe out of 20 people go to a networking event. Ask these questions at genuinely care about people in be interested. That's the best way and the same thing goes for Content strategy. I don't go around going. Oh, here's the best video that I think will serve the Universe. I mean by all means I'm not against that I still have that. That feeling in my heart, but I combine that with what's a real question. Someone asked me. What's a real question. Someone is asking me you know, what something that someone is actually struggling with and they need help. They don't have a solution yet. Because if you're just solving a problem that sort of been solved like top 10 self-help books to read that's cool. You can make of it like that and get some views and that's that's awesome. I'm not bashing it. But what I am saying is if you really want to serve somebody think about what they really need, what are they paying points, you know and again identify who can help most Important that's the key. Hey just wanted to hop in here and say that if you're enjoying my videos and you would like to take your life to the next level. I invite you to hop on a free 30-minute call with me by going to ring Raphael.com. If you want to speak to me personally and get a customized strategy and game plan and some real advice to help you progress and really grow tremendously exponentially again, just go to ring Rafael. Dot-com that way you can schedule our session and I can talk to you very very soon. I love what you're saying. Just getting in touch with people talking getting in the comments and asking what didn't need help with and allowing them to be your source of inspiration owner of content superpower. One last question. What would you if you had Raphael 18 years old right now with us in a conversation, what would you say? You know, honestly, I would say this is exactly what you need. Go through enjoy that would be it because pure ano it purifies you like go through the fire and you will be cleansed. It sounds like some cold thing but it's the real stuff like you need to go through this if you're going to be the expert right now stop if you think you're someone you're not stop if you're trying to do something that doesn't feel right to you. And you know, you can't really help somebody and you feel like an impostor stop get good and then help get good and then help find someone to help help them same goes for products. You know find the product people need design something that people would actually use and like and there's a gap. That's what business is supply and demand right. So increase your Demand by making your supply better. That's so nice. It's so nice. Yeah, I think it takes a bit of proximate bit of practice as well. Because in the beginning you're going to be like am I being an imposter right now? And even if you are going to feel like you're not being one, you know and just like initiating that internal dialogue. Log where you know you're being honest with yourself when you know that you're not being honest with yourself that takes a bit of practice to yeah, it's not it's not the instant fix it takes time and you have to eat self-awareness and journal and I used all those tools of course to their important, you know, ask yourself. Like what am I re everyday? I re-evaluate I go. You know, what? Am I really doing here? Does this make sense? Is this leading me to where I want to go? Is this really helping people on the highest level and my really serving who I can best serve you got a question yourself if you don't have a coach, especially You need to be coaching yourself hard, you know and you should get a CO everybody should have a coach if you don't have a coach, you're weird. You're you you're not going to be that one guy that's on social media and he's like I never needed that scary. Right? Like I never needed that's like winning the lottery with with your genetics. Did Coach earlier on he would have been much much much further on. Well, okay, that's great. He used to say that he never needed it and he's Ralph listening to his intuition I do that too. Guess what you can also add a coach and now you can be you know me 24 years old and you can have this Mega awesome business doing what you love and you're making passive income and you know, like you kind of famous to which is I mean, you know, silly I don't really care about that so much. But when your when your speech goes viral and you get recognized and like a local store in the north of Norway, that's when you're like, okay, right what happened here? You know, it's a that's that's crazy, but the NG is what I realized is like it's a hundred percent, you know, if you don't if you don't work with somebody that checks you and hold you accountable and and challenges you to grow then you're just you're full of it. You know, you're just not your never you're just but maybe you're in an echo chamber, you know, you're just hearing the same thing over and over again and you think it's the right thing and you're never really expanding. I love that. I love that. Awesome. Well, it's been a great pleasure thing that women chatting and I've personally learned A lot and guys, let us know in the comments. What did you love them most talked about this interview?
I have a deep conversation with Bogdan Rosu about my life's journey from being a broke janitor to becoming a successful life coach! Coaching with Rafael: https://www.rafaeleliassen.com/coaching  Rafael's channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/RafaelEliassen?sub_confirmation=1  Bogdan's channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyVg9giAJA9kgkQNFR-wyAA  #LifeCoaching #CoachingJourney #CoachLife #LifeCoach #Coaching #CoachingClients #GetClients #CoachingBusiness #CoachJourney #LifeJourney #SelfImprovement #PersonalDevelopment #Motivation #SelfHelp #Motivation #Motivational #MotivationalSpeaker #MotivationalSpeech  How does one become a life or business coach? I started out as a life coach when I was 18 and it wasn’t so great. I had social anxiety, I worked as a janitor just to get by. This is me five years ago struggling to get words out; My life was such a mess, why would anyone pay me to help them? That question made me a prisoner in my own mind, cutting me out from being a successful life coach. Though now I have had almost 9000 hours of coaching and have worked with people all around the world I had to break out of that cage. The biggest hurdle of mine was the belief that; I am too young, why would anyone listen to me? If you are starting out as a life coach you know what I am talking about you have your own version of this. The voice that says; why should people listen to me? who am I to tell them anything? Solve this hurdle and you will be able to figure out the rest of your journey yourself. Most people try to overcome it by faking it. The fake it till you make it approach, talk like an authority, an expert. That’s a trap because it’s fake and your clients can sense that. The way I got started out was;  Hey, you know what you should be doing, let me help you do that. Let me hold you accountable for that. This way I was not pretending to be an enlightened human; I was just being honest with a pure desire to help the other person. Allow yourself to be vulnerable because only through cracks, your imperfection, your insecurities, can the light escape. It's not about manipulating them to pay you; It’s about can you solve a problem? Can you pour your heart out and try to help the other person the best you can? 