All right. This is tablet Pennington. And this is the Havoc Huntington podcast. And today I'm talking about a topic that is really important. But something we don't always like to talk about I want to hit the topic of rejection. Bandon mint and building more confidence. Gosh, you would think in our world where we're all obsessed with empowering people and having a strong voice and going for it and being ourselves. We wouldn't have an issue with self-confidence and abandonment or rejection. But we do and I want to kind of talk to you about a moment this week where it came up in my own life and where I've had to really acknowledge it and begin to build a different story in my own life. So I grew up in a pretty normal home my Mom and Dad loved each other. They didn't come from and they came from my mom came from a pretty healthy home. My dad came from a healthy home in some ways, but mostly not healthy. It's kind of confusing but and basically I was raised somewhat in a bubble of certain things in life, which are the reason I'm telling you that is because what I'm about to tell you, I want you to understand how it works in our own lives because just because we're R not raised around something doesn't mean we're not touched by it and it doesn't mean we don't need tools for it. So my dad was raised in a political home. His father was a congressman and he had three siblings and then he had his to his twin brother and himself. Well, when his mom got pregnant with him his grandmother or grandfather, I should say my grandfather his dad wanted nothing to do with him. He didn't want to have another baby. He wanted to have he didn't want The Twins and so he gave he even gave his wife pills to abort my dad and his brother and my grandmother who was an Italian feisty Nana. She said to him you take the pills. I'm not killing these babies. I'm having these babies you take the pills. Well, that was okay. I'm glad she fought for his life. But ultimately he didn't want them in the house. And so from the age of seven on they never lived at home in the summer and then are five on and then by the age of Of seven, they lived in boarding schools and they were completely abandon completely like institutionalized for their young ages and my dad was part of like a Catholic boarding school. And by the time he left that boarding school. He says I was an atheist. I hated it. I didn't want anything. If God was a part of this. I don't want any part of it. That's what he told himself and he became an atheist for seven years. In fact, he used to The he would mock Christians who would mock Believers and try to get them to turn on their faith and he would like in his fraternity at College. He would visibly mock people he would Champion atheism and all of that stuff and eventually went into chanting to Krishna and trying to worship Buddha and trying to find out if what was really real in his life and he said he finally with a broken relationship the girl that he was his love of his life at that point broke up with him and he became suicidal and he said he didn't want to breathe live. He couldn't eat he was devastated and eventually went into a field. He was a young man and took a dull pocket knife and walked in the field and said Jesus Buddha, Krishna. I don't know which one of you is real, but if you are real, I want you to reveal yourself to me and he said he was too chicken to kill himself. So Just kind of lived in his hippie world with drugs and sex and rock and roll and all that stuff and eventually wandered into a small church and there was a there was two old ladies that were praying for Revival and when they walked in when they came in it was with the Jesus movement. Jesus mood was a huge movement that happened throughout the states, but specifically in California region and thousands of people got saved or radically delivered from addiction and a life of Just Brokenness and were immediately healed and so my dad was saved that night and he said when he prayed to ask Jesus into his heart to be Lord of his life immediately when he prayed the beads that were around his neck that he had been chanting to began to choke him. And so he said at that moment. He said his very first prayer. He said Jesus help me and he reached up and grabbed those beads and pulled them off and the bead scattered all over this wood floor in a little place called Timbuktu in Or yeah, which is a real place and that leader that was leading that night ran up to and said what happened? Why did you break your necklace? And he said well, these are the beads. I used to chant to and the guy said oh, well, those are demons and you were praying to demons and they immediately started to choke you and you basically pulled them off and you broke whatever that curse was in that moment and he got free my dad ended up going from being an atheist and anti-god to becoming an ordained minister and began. To lead travel for 20 years and then became a pastor for 20 years and all that stuff. Okay, but I'm telling you a whole bunch of stuff because I want to get to the point of what is really matters. So my dad's story line has been one of Abandonment rejection and a lack of confidence just to warn you UPS is dropping up a box and you're going to hear the doorbell in a minute. Okay. So this has been his story which has been basically abandonment so Rejection and a lack of confidence when he came to Christ. He began he really went after that part and was able to I told you I was able to really begin his healing. Now. This is what I want you to understand is I was raised in a home full of love and connection and safety, but that generational thing that's followed. My dad would love nothing more than to knock on my door. Or speaking of his knocking on my door at there's my dog and they're bare. No, so I instead of saying that's his issue. He's got the issue of lack of confidence. He's got the issue of Abandonment rejection. I realized that that Spirit of Abandonment and rejection wants to follow my story. So I noticed growing up in a home that conversation of rejection and abandonment followed my life. So not only did it follow his life. It followed my life, which is weird because I can't pinpoint it, but I can feel it like when you're around it and so that storyline followed him. And so I noticed in my life that that that the enemy would love nothing more than a follow me on that story line as well. Now, I want you to think about this for a minute in your own life. So anyway, I was sitting last week. We've had a really unique year at truth table and a truth table. We've had an incredible team Dustin Michelle Jessica Caleb. They are like a dream team but in an amazing set of events Dustin a Rochelle there her grandfather was very ill and so they decide they would go home and be with her Grandpa because they didn't know how long they would have which I totally respect. I totally get it and we Champion them to do that. Meanwhile Jessica my PA came to us. I said well it looks like my life is transitioning. I'm probably going to be getting married within the not near future but with in the future and so I need to begin to think about going home and having my plans for my wedding which I did. I'm like Champion. Yes, awesome exciting. This is a long time. You're 31 years old. You've met the love of your life. I can't be mad about it. Like that's a good thing in your life. Right? So I'm kind of going through this process and in the meeting with them. I'm excited. I'm like I get it absolutely this needs to happen. You met the love of Your life he's an incredible man. He pursued you you're getting married. Dustin Rochelle. Thank God you knew that your grandpa isn't well and you have the opportunity to go home and be with your family your Chilean you I mean families important. I'm Italian I get it. I'm all championing this and then I get in my car and all of a sudden River got you know, when you're in the middle of something and then all of a sudden your wall start closing in does anybody know what I'm talking about? We're you're feeling good about it and then all of a sudden like life hits you where you realize My gosh that's two-thirds of my team are like leaving their like they're they're leaving and they're all for good reasons and all the sudden. I started feeling this this deep like abandonment of like, oh my gosh. Everyone's leaving me like I'm not going to have anybody and you know, they're rejecting me. I'm sure this is like and this is the way that your your brain begins to work. I don't know if you're like me, but this is how it starts to work, which is like they probably were going to leave but this just sped it up. They were going to leave you anyway. Probably, you know you didn't have enough to keep them here and all these like weird narratives that began to follow me. Does anybody know what I'm talking about where it's nothing is real but it feels really real and what's interesting is that that voice that narrative is really familiar like all of a sudden I'm like, yes. I know this voice. I understand this and so I don't even have to listen to it. I'm just filling in facts like this is going to happen. I knew this was going to happen, you know, nothing is always set. Of course. I'm going to live I'm going to end up abandoned. Of course, I'm going to end up without anybody wanting to be with me and I'm just going through this and it's ridiculous because on paper if that's not true, like factually it's not true. It's nothing of what they've said to me is true about that. They've all been loving and caring and connected and all of that but I have this narrative that's followed me throughout my life. Does anybody know what I'm talking about? And so as I begin to hear this narrative, I have a decision to make in the car. So I immediately go to like self-pity. Does anybody else do that? We're all of a sudden. I'm like, I'm working harder than everybody else. Why does it have to be me doesn't anybody know I go into this like, you know, I'm a working mom. I won't even have to work as a mom and I start doing these kind of finesse final like just no Hope from here. Does anybody know what I'm talking? That were you just literally go into the I knew that the shoe is going to drop the other shoe. And here it is and it was going to happen. So there it is. And you know, I've been trying to avoid this and we knew this was going to happen and I start feeling like I don't want to share my life with anybody else. So anybody else get that? I don't I don't want to let anybody else in I just want to be by myself. I just want to do my own life. I want to shut everything else down and I just want to go into my cocoon. Does anybody know what I'm talking about? About yeah, just shake your head if you don't I'm talking about and if so show me a little bit of love because you know, and at this moment there were Seasons when I would have done that I would have ignored their calls ignore text messages. I would have gotten to my house. I would have thrown on a Netflix series and I would have just been done and I would have just shut down and I don't even like talking about it like that because I don't feel very spiritually I say that I feel like when I say that it makes me sound really enthusiastic. Cure like we thought you were a strong leader. Why why are you dealing with that or you know, you sound kind of unstable. Those are the things I start thinking about when I tell you these things, but but I know that I'm not alone in this I know that many of you have the same exact thing and so I started going through this Narrative of you know, how am I going to do this and what I have to work so hard and I thought it was going to be easier and now I got to retrain a bunch of people and I started doing all this and then I realized I had a decision to make Make and this is what I have to do as as a Christian as a Godly person as a leader as somebody who runs an organization. I have to make a decision where I'm going to stay soft and I'm going to stay open and I'm going to realize that God is divinely orchestrating this so I have a decision and at that moment I have to reject abandonment. I have to say they are leaving but they are not leaving me. They're leaving they're leaving our organization, but they are not leaving. They are transitioning but they are not rejecting me and I have to say it. I have to actually acknowledge. They are not rejecting you have a life. They are not rejecting treat the table. They're not rejecting where you're going. No, no, and then I have to in the middle of that after I've acknowledged. This is not rejection abandonment. This is this is something that I want. I want to kind of play in because it makes me feel powerful in the moment, but that's not what this is. And what I have to do is look at it and say okay God you are up to something new. This is not an accident you have you have held my life in your hands up until now you have orchestrated every step of the way. I mean, you are excited about my future, you know, the potential of what we have going on. And so it would be a lie for me to believe that you let me down. Come on. It would be a lie for me to believe that everyone's going to be with me and the moment they transitioned then they're abandoning me. That's a lie. It would be a lie for me to believe that I'm going to be all alone in Into this. I'm the only one that's going to be working hard. It's that's a ridiculous lie, and I have to begin to unpack that and I have to start with God you have a plan doesn't negate the hard part of it doesn't doesn't say that this isn't going to be hard doesn't mean that I wish things didn't have to change. It doesn't mean any of that. But what it simply means is that I have to be able to acknowledge God you have a plan and number two every time you change something God you change it for the better. Are you have to begin to think this way every time change is happening? Someone transitions out? We lose a job. We are moving somewhere. Are we lose a house? We need to go somewhere. We need to do something. You are always positioning me for the best. So when something was good for a season, it may not be the best for the next season. So instead of me connecting myself to this one thing means God's been good to me or this one thing means God's taken care of. I have to realize that in order for things to grow things have to change just I want you to think about that for a minute in your life. Whatever is going on in your life right now in order for it to grow and for it to be healthy change has to happen relationships have to be moved around positions need to change jobs need to be changed family needs to change sometimes best friends need to change the way we do life has to a change and so if I resist change and I'm always assuming that change is bad or change means I'm missing something or change means. I'm going to get the short end of the stick then every time something goes to shift or change. I'm going to feel that I'm about to get punished. Yeah, so here's what you have to do. You have to begin to preach to yourself. I know we all go. We're like somebody preach to me somebody pray for me. So many problems for me. There's a point in your walk with Christ where you begin to be that person you don't wait any longer for your spouse to preach to you. You don't wait any longer for you to get to church on Sunday. You don't wait any longer so you can get someone to encourage you or get coffee with your best friend you begin to realize no I'm responsibility. I'm The ball to strengthen myself to preach to myself to preach myself into a good mood. Come on. I'm responsible, too. To unpack the lies that are trying to hang out around me my story my family my lineage my boys because the truth is my dad dealt with abandonment and rejection. If I deal with abandonment rejection, guess what my boys are going to deal with abandonment rejection. And if I don't deal with it, guess what I'm going to parent them in it. So every time they don't get invited to a birthday party. I'm going to respond and overreact every time they don't get a position in something. I'm going to over react and respond each time. Somebody transitions out of their life. I'm Begin to kind of give this narrative that somehow they've been abandoned rejected and none of that's true right now now yeah, there can be things that follow them. But I'm going to end up continuing that storyline in my family and I've got to be able to say it stops here. It stops here. That's my question for you today. Are you saying no no, it stops here. The gossip stops here. The lies stop here. The passive-aggressive stops here. The fear stops here the sexual perversion stops here. Come on, you've got to say I'm not going to allow this and you know, what? Will you have to work harder than your parents probably? Will you have to work harder than your kids? Probably you are going to have to work hard part of transformation isn't just sit back and listen to Super Soul Sunday. I love Super Soul Sunday. I'm not against it. It's not just about popping on the Bethel podcast. It's not just about listening to favorite worship album that is not transformation. It can help inspire you for transformation, but transformation comes when we choose to do the hard thing when we say it stops here. And every time I have a stinking thought that comes in my head that's from the pit of how that's here to shame me fear me give me anxiety hinder me contain me. No pit stops here. And I'm going to call it out. And what you'll have to do is you'll have to say no. I am not abandon. I am not rejected. I am not fearful. I am not like yeah, I might have some fear but I am not a fearful person. I am not a pervert. Come on. I am not I love that. I stop right there. I am. I'm not what people have said. About me and I've got to stop this. I am not, you know worthless. I'm not a reject. I'm not abandoned like the no no no and we have to stop that narrative and we stop that narrative. Then we have to replace it with true so we can't just say no. No. No, I don't believe that. No, I'm not stops right here. We have to actually replace with truth, which is my family is going to be known for being the most loving and accepting family on the face of the Earth. Like you have to interrupt it. You're gonna have to say no. No God's got something so incredible for me in the future. I'm not God is only we are only going forward. I love how Joyce Meyer says I haven't come this far to go back right? I'm not I haven't come this far to not do anything else like I'm going forward and so in the car, so I'm preaching right now, but I want to pull it back for a minute in the car. I had a decision to make what did I want to do? I wanted to cry I wanted to be like I'm done. Let's pack up our stuff and go home to my mom and dad and I'm embarrassed to say that I'm 41 years old like come on. On but I wanted to say like this doesn't feel right. It's his this as hard. I must be missing something now. I don't like this and the truth was I'm not doing anything wrong because there's a struggle doesn't mean I'm doing anything wrong. It means I'm going in the right direction and often it's how I navigate what's happening on the inside of me is going to help me. Have a great year or hope horrible year. It's change going to happen. Yes. Am I going to have awesome new staff members? Yes. Am I gonna party hard at Jessica's wedding whenever that is heck. Yeah, and when I go to Connecticut, am I going to pop in and see Rochelle and Dustin you better believe it? I told them get a three-bedroom house. I'm bringing my family and my dog but like yeah, my that's got going away. I'm not break. I'm not Burning Bridges, but what I do have to realize is this if I have a ceiling Ali then every time God wants to bring me somewhere. This is my Lohan motion every time God wants to lift me higher show me my potential show me what's way up here on the Mountain Top Every time. I hit my ceiling of Abandonment or narratives or lies or generational or Heritage things. Every time I go to go high or build or go to the next place in my life. I'm going to always hit this narrative. Narratives aren't just your own thing. I mean, I've seen it in Generations. I've seen it with the women in your family. I've seen with the men in your family. I've seen it in my own life. I've seen it with relationships. I mean these narratives aren't just one thing these things follow us and until we understand that this is a smokescreen for where we're going. We won't we will we will always believe it and it will always shut us down and we will always feel like it's controlling us and so for me transformation for her, You look Huntington transformation for you is I had a decision to make in the car doesn't get easier the more influence. You have the more income. You have the more relationships you have the more networking. You have the cuter your kids. None of that makes it easier. It actually makes it harder because you realize that you can't just check out for a month you realize that you have an hour. I have an hour of an hour where I cannot answer my phone call and play my country music and cry and say this is hard but then I have a decision to make and that is am I going to lead or am I going to follow and if I'm going to follow then I'll follow myself right to the pit of depression. If I follow I'm going to follow myself right to the pit of anxiety if I follow that I'm going to follow myself right into isolation. So I have a decision to make at that moment and then Then in that in the middle of that right in the middle of that I make that decision. I am going to become all I'm called to be and I am not dying on this mountain. I say this all the time makes me emotional because I say all the time to my husband. I am not dying on this mountain. I've come too far to die on this hill I want to conquer that mountain. I'm not dying on the hill. No, you know, I am a I'm gonna I am I want to be here 20 years from now and if I die on this mountain with come on, come on Avila, I can hear all my Aussie friends like come on Avila anytime. There's like somebody in my life that I feel like it's like challenging me. It's my always my Australian friends. And then I have a decision to make and I'll tell you what I'll preach myself right into right in a promise. I'll get on the phone and my husband I'll go. How are you doing? I go. Oh, you know what? Let me tell you something. I am so excited about this year. This is Incredible. God is strategically moving things around because he wants to take us to the next place. I mean look what God is doing I would have never said goodbye to these people. I would have never transitioned or had them live somewhere else. I would have never I would have just built a bunker and we all would have lived together. Look what God is doing God is doing something and he's divinely orchestrating and positioning us for the next season. Look what God is doing. No, no one is leaving. No one's abandoning. No. No God is positioning. What if you what if you actually processed your life right at the second were you are not going without you are being positioned and what if you realize that this moment that that there's a narrative that feels really comfortable that your family probably had and you've had as a young man or a young woman and you broke up with that and said, I'm not I'm not doing that anymore. I know what that means three days later. I feel like crap. I feel like I can't do what I need to do. I hurt myself. I hurt my family. I feel a mess. I'm not doing this anymore. Mmm. Nope. I admit I'm a little scared. I admit I don't know what to do next. I admit that some of these things feel really daunting. Like, how am I going to do this? I don't know but what I do know is Is that I was made for this and you're the same way like you I want to say this to you in this like spiritually. Parenting you're made for this white thing or husbanding You're Made for This doing the thing in front of you job-wise career-wise. Relationally you were made for this and you'll be shocked at that moment. When you break up with that narrative all of a sudden you'll start to feel like no now, let me say this you can have a Moment of clarity and then you'll kind of feel yourself go back. So ultimately you get this Moment of clarity like yeah, this is great. We're going to do this. This is awesome, and then you'll wake up. The next morning and often it's in that vulnerable state of like you're going throughout your day. And then you realize oh something shifted like you ever had that works like oh they broke up with me or I lost my job or oh, I just got that bill and you'll have that kind of moment and at that moment you just need to be aware that that's not you're not slipping back and you're not missing anything. It's just your habit of your brain panicking a little and just stop and say no the future is bright. We got a lot to do and we're going to go forward and ultimately I don't need anyone to believe me except for myself. You know what I mean? Like, I'm not here to drag the world with me. I'm here to drag myself with me and agree with truth and live in truth. And God will take care of it. I just want you to know something that the spirit of fear and anxiety would love nothing more than to suck the life out of you today the spirit of fear and anxiety would love nothing more than to remind you that you don't have what it takes and you're such a mess up. And you should be further along and what's wrong with you and why can't you get it? Right? And why does everybody get an opportunity and a breakthrough? And you're the one that's sitting here fighting for your breakthrough? I just want you to know we all hear it. It's really normal to hear that narrative. But what you can do is you can shut it up and you can say nope. I hear you. I'm used to you. I know what that is, and I'm not giving you any space in my life right now. So when it comes to abandonment and rejection, the first thing I want you to realize is that you are not abandoned you are not acted you go. What do you mean have low like my spouse left me or I never knew my dad or you know, like I feel like I was abandoning rejected. Let me say this on the earth. Yeah, and and not I can't ignore that. Yeah, you gone through some things on the Earth, but let me say something in heaven you have been wanted from the moment. You were created from the very moment you were here. God was like you have a place at my table come sit by me kill the fatted calf. We are like making a meal we're celebrating your life. You are so necessary to my life to Art my purpose into my plan on this Earth You are so necessary. And I want you to know something that the enemy would love he uses abandonment and rejection to shut us up. You know what I mean? Like he uses that so that we can feel like I'm going to be and really what it comes down to and I haven't processed this Foley but for me, It comes down to feeling embarrassed and ashamed because what it comes down to is that if I fail then there's something inside of me that says everyone's going to know I failed and I can't fix that and so it's better that I hide and show up and I just want you to know something that I'm probably going to fail in front of you guys. I'm going to fail in front of my family not intentionally just in life and you know what? I'm not going to bow down to shame. I'm not going to bed. And the fear and I'm not going to bow down to feeling like I'm going to mess this up. Of course. I want to mess this up you're going to mess up. Your kids are going to be messed up. Your marriage is going to get messed up and instead of trying to make it perfect and avoid it. Why don't you get a plan to position yourself in a better way and just say, you know, what life isn't going to be perfect. No one I know is living a perfect life. No one I know has it all together. But one thing I do know is is that you get to choose what happens on the inside of you and no one can control? That no one can control that. Yeah break those chains exactly. So that's kind of what I wanted to tell you guys today. Do I have a journey? I do have a journey. Am I excited about the future? I am excited that lasted for like an hour an hour and it wasn't even a personal thing about anybody my life. It was an old narrative that wanted to follow me around and and lie to me that somehow all of this is a mirage and I'm going to end up destitute do you ever have that is that just me like all of this like is never going to And up as you think and it's all going to be a mass. Does anybody else experience that I don't know if anybody else experiences that but I kind of get that the shoe is going to the shoe is going to fall right on the other side and I'm going to I'm going to like I knew it. I knew that I was gonna be able to keep this up. Right exactly. We refuse to listen to fear and anxiety exactly - Lynn. So that's the main thing today that I want you to think about and if you've experienced it. Well, you know, you're not alone. Like I'm you're not alone you and that's what I have to do is I have to shut my phone off. Off shut everything out and say okay. What am I believing and then begin to challenge those thoughts and then to begin to realize that I I'm not God's not done with me yet. Right and this is one of the reasons I wrote leap into love and I wasn't planning on talking about it right this second, but I wrote leap into love becoming present to your purpose on the planet because I'm still in process you're still in process like no one is complete and transformation requires process during a lot of the seasons of our life. And so someone can go. Oh I'm good to go, but things shift and change and we get used to certain things and we start nurturing thoughts and and things that we didn't expect and I think part of us growing and self-confidence and acceptance and and growing in in feeling like our presence matters is when we're willing to challenge our internal narratives and no one knows what they are, but you So I can't say oh, this is what have a believes you'll be free. No. No, you're the only one that will know that will know what's happening on the inside of you and what you're thinking about. But what I do know is is self-awareness is the place of breakthrough when we begin to realize what has been used against us. And so I just want to challenge you with that and one that last thing I want to ask you then I've done is the area that you're dealing with. Is it connected to your mom or dad or the or your caretaker? It's for you to think about that for a minute is just some of the things that feel dramatic and intense in your life. Is that connected to how your parents viewed life experience life how their narrative in their own world and what you think about that because this is where the power comes is when I realized oh rejection abandonment is a generational thing that's trying to come against my family or I'm not buying into that once I realized that it wasn't so personal. But it was really the weapons formed against me and my family and my Heritage and my lineage and all those other things. I bet you anything that what you're dealing with somebody Your Grandparent dealt with your great-grandparent dealt with and you get a chance to interrupt this you get a chance to stop it in its tracks and say nope. I'm not doing it depressions always been a part of our family but no no II might have I might deal with a little bit depression, but I'm not a depressed person and I'm getting healthy and whole and I'm going to I'm going to grow right / accounts. Also help me with suppers. I agree with that a thousand percent if I could like that a thousand percent, I would yeah, you know, I think I just think it's really good to be honest. Just really good to be honest about what's happening. And you know, what's amazing even in my marriage is that when I'm not doing well or I'm processing something and I don't know what to do. I often will tell my husband like here's what I think has happened and I always have to go back to that moment where things broke, you know, I'm saying like I'm going throughout my life and then I'm feeling agitated and something's happening at night and I'm like what happened and I have to go back to the moment where something got disconnected and I have to go ok, I Good. I got to shower that morning. I was feeling good. I talked to my mom. I was doing this doing that and then on my driver home from the office, I wasn't doing well. What was it and I have to backtrack to the moment that I wasn't doing. Well, so I need you to go all the way back to like, where was it? Where did it break wind was I feeling okay and then something happened and what was it telling me and then oftentimes you can trace it all the way back to a thought. Something shifted everything to a thought or what someone said and it took you by surprise and you processed it in a way that you weren't ready to process. And so you you panic, you know, I didn't know how to process that so that's it. Yeah, where did I lose? My peace? Exactly. Ask yourself that question. Where did I lose my peace? I got to go back and pick it up. Right right and often for me. It's I lose my peace when I'm blindsided. Does anybody else get that? I like usually I'm doing good when I'm fully aware, and I'm adulting and I've got my life and then something happens. I wasn't expecting and usually that's when I turn into a little girl. We're all of a sudden. I'm like, I don't like you. I don't want to be with you. I just think about myself. I want to I don't you guys are scary and then I have to go back and realize okay. Wait, that's me jumping into a little girl because I was blindsided and not part of me that wanted a panic, but you know what? I'm not I'm safe. I'm okay. Yeah exactly blinds like a crep. I'm not dying on this mountain exactly Kathy. So this is really really critical that we ask ourselves. Where did I turn into a little kid in the minute and what lie did I believe and then we unpack that the truth is you are so loved you belong here on Earth. God is more excited about your potential. Then you are he's got a plan that no man can stop her hinder. I mean you have there is a purpose in front of you your life matters. I just come against that Spirit of death on you right now. Why that says you're not going to be missed or that you're not contributing. That's that's suicidal thing. I just come against in Jesus name and I say no to that. That's a lie from the pit of Hell, we recognize it as the last assignment of the enemy to rob you from having your purpose and we just say no. No, it's not happening in our lives. Yep right now some of you I just feel it. Even it prophetically there are some of you that are watching this there's like one or two of you currently right now that are dealing with feeling like it would be easier. ER to leave the Earth and I want you to know something that is a Lie from the pit of Hell, it is not true. And I want you to know something you are very important to God and what he has on the earth and there are people that are waiting for you on the other side of this moment. And so you have to get whole you have to come you have to get out of this pit. You have to there are people waiting for you. We need your life. You're going to have to you're going to have to fight and ask for help go get some help from somebody and say I need some help. Yeah, yep what God is doing cannot be stopped. Yeah, so that's kind of what my thought was today. But yeah, it's hard to share these things. Like it's not natural for me to want to tell you guys this it's much more natural for me to want to act like I have it together. It's not going to help you guys. It's just not going to help you because it's not true and you need to know that process is okay and doesn't matter how old you are or how you know being ordained minister or what an author or whatever like my thoughts have to be renewed and I have to challenge them and I have to put them under the authority of Jesus Christ every single day and you can do this too. Well, I hope that really blessed your life. I hope that everything God is trying to get to you. You grabbed a hold up. Don't forget to give me a shout out on the socials, and they're almost every day. And if this podcast really spoke to you, would you consider leaving a review? So others can find this podcast and as well as some Stars. I hope you have a great day and I'll catch you next time.
In this podcast episode I want to talk about rejection, abandonment and building more confidence. I grew up in a safe home. But just because we’re not raised around something doesn’t mean we’re not touched by it. My Dad’s story was a story of rejection, abandonment and a lack of confidence but when he found Christ, he started to go after those things and find healing. I was raised in a home of love and safety, but that generational thread that followed my Dad would love nothing more than to knock on my door. Instead of saying those were his issues, I realized that spirit of rejection and abandonment wants to follow my story as well. The narrative of abandonment and rejection sounds so familiar in our thoughts that it doesn’t even sound surprising to us. But when we hear those negative narratives in our mind, we have a decision to make. We can go to self-pity, or we can stay soft and open to the people around us and realize God is divinely orchestrating everything in our life. In those moments we have to reject abandonment. Thank you so much for tuning in today! Let's break up with the narratives in our mind that keep us from living fully free. 