You are listening to the women of the military podcast where we share the stories of female service members and have a military touch their lives. I'm your host military veteran military spouse and Mom Amanda Huffman. My goal is to find the heart of the story and uncover issues women face while serving in the military. If you want to be encouraged by the stories of military women and be inspired to change the world keep tuned for this latest episode of women of them. military I've been debating for a while to do a single person just me five gas and I got advice from a friend that I should try it out. So I'm going to start doing once a month podcast of this me and sharing some of the things that are either on my heart or things that I've learned. I'm starting this one with seven things. I wish I knew before I decided to join the military. very I feel like I learned a lot when I join the military and I thought that because I went to four years of Reserve officer training Corps or ROTC training before I actually became a second lieutenant in the air force that I was ready to be in their force and that I learned everything I need to run but what I really found out was the learning had just begun. I still had a lot to learn and my life was going to change even more. It already had and the first four years so you might know that I started looking into the military and I didn't know anything about the military. My family doesn't have a military history. I am the first officer in my family and my outside my uncle who served in Vietnam and my grandfather who served during World War Two we don't really have any military ties that I know of when I started looking. I'm into the military. I didn't know anything. I actually got advice to meet with a colonel who when I went to the office to be with him called him by his first name and was quickly corrected that no, it's Colonel so-and-so and I felt really awkward because I didn't know anything about the military and I wasn't in the military and I was wondering why this person was correcting me from calling someone by their first name to say no, it's colonel. So and so but now that I have served in the military, I can understand a little bit more about why they treated me the way they did and how not that I offended them but that I had made kind of a mistake in what I had done. So I really didn't know anything about the military when I decided to join and when I first did ROTC, I thought if I could learn the ranks the branches. Has how to March through this Loop when I was in uniform and all the other military type things then I would be a good officer. and even those those things are an important part of being in the military, they're just kind of surface level things there things that you have to know to be a good Airmen soldiers Marine demon coastie, whatever Branch or serving in but they're kind of just the beginning pieces and they kind of become who you are and you know these things just as like You know your address growing up. They're just part of who you are and it's not really what makes you into the leader that you're going to be in the service or even the career field that you do. Those things are just things that everyone knows and not not the way that your job or your position crafts you into who you are going to be and what you're going to do. So let's start with these are the seven things. I wish I would have known before I decided to join the military. The first thing is that the training environment isn't like real life. I thought because I had done for years of Roc and I had done for week boot camp in the middle of that and I've gotten to do some other Hands-On training with the air force that when I went active duty life would pretty much be the same. I would still be in a training type environment. I don't really know how to explain it, but I thought that That I knew it was coming and I think I should have known more because my husband was already in the Air Force, but I guess I just didn't really understand how much would change from when I was a Cadet in the ROTC program to when I was a second to it. And I also learned that I felt like the yelling in the super crazy amount of exercising that you did at bootcamp was kind of an Overkill but it actually is a really effective. Way to change you into who the military wants you to be. It's not something that is put in there just so that people can yell at you. It's a part of the training environment and it changes you from being an individual to being part of a team and being part of military. You either learn how to lead if you're going to be an officer or you learn how to follow if you're going to be an enlisted member and it just puts you into the right mindset. Set to be able to do these things, but it doesn't really transfer over to your job. I never got yelled at when I was doing my job as a civil here. I got to do a lot of things that I never expected. One of the things I did when I first got to the base was help with the are fit the air show that was coming up and the lieutenant above me had just been promoted to be the group leader. And so I was Brandon second to and I was in charge. Just doing all the CP coordination for the air show which civil engineers have a lot of stuff that they do for the Airfield and for maintaining the base. And so that was a lot of work and I had a master sergeant with me who helped me learn what I needed to do and I kind of got thrown into being in charge of something that I didn't really know what I was doing and I didn't really expect that to happen within my first year of being in the Air Force. But that's what you're trained to do. So you just take what you have been given you rely on the people who are below you who are supposed to help you and train you and you just make it work another good example of how the training environments not look like real life. Is that when I went to Afghanistan I want to Camp Atterbury end of Indiana for four months and one of the things that we did was a thing called rollover training and rollover training is where they hook up a Humvee or an mrap which is a mine resistant ambush protected vehicle and they hook it up to a rig and then they put you put your seatbelt on you're wearing your gear your helmet and your like I do TV Ivy a which I don't know what that is, but your body armor, I don't look up that afternoon but your body armor that you wear and it was like 20 to 30 pounds and then they put you with your seatbelt and your gear on and they flip you over and over like three or four times and then they told us it would randomly end up in a different position and then we have to get out. My cold crew when we randomly got flipped up and down. We always ended up side down and so I was watching it happen as I was waiting for my turn totally freaking out about this because I don't know why but I just really didn't want to do this training but everybody had to do it and so I got in the vehicle we flipped around a few times and then we ended up upside down as expected and I kind of panicked. I started thinking about all the blood running. My head and I would pass out and then I died and I kind of just went a little bit crazy and there was a Staff Sergeant in the front seat and he was like I can't get to you because I had to push myself up with my one of my hands and then unbuckle myself with the other because I was I was hanging upside down and the weight of my body pushing against the seat belt wouldn't allow me to get out of the seat belt without pushing myself. Self up to get there be a little bit less resistance and the first few times I tried it it didn't work. And so then I started to freak out and he the staff sergeant in the front seat said I can't get to where you are. You have to do this on your own and I don't know what's flipped the switch or how I stopped freaking out. I guess it reluctant push Bay and back to my training that I've gone to before but he made me realize I could do this I had to do it and so I did and so I push myself up I was able to unbuckle the seatbelt. I kind of collapsed into a ball and re-centered myself and was able to get out of upright and do what I needed to do to get out of the vehicle and get everybody out of the vehicle like we're supposed to do and I never really think much about this. I was just happy that I survived the training and that I didn't have to again. But I did have to do it again when we got to Afghanistan before we could go to our Bob's which is forward operating base and we were at the name base and Bagram. And before we could go out to all our individual basis and Bob's to do our mission for the nine months that we were there. We had to do improvised explosive device trained locally that are also already done in Indiana and then we had to do a rollover training this time. It was in a Camera and which an mrap is a lot bigger than a Humvee. So it was actually really fun to do it in the Arab. I wasn't afraid. Well. We were rolling around everyone in the vehicle was kind of like wow, like it's a roller coaster and we just had a different vibe and atmosphere because we had done it before and we were ready and we ended up being kind of like on our side instead of totally upside down and and when the vehicle stopped I knew exactly like how to brace myself so that I could get out of the vehicle how I could support myself with my one hand and my legs and then unlock the seatbelt and then I was able to get out and it was super super easy and it just surprised me that one little thing like that. Would prepare me so much to face whatever I was going to come and it kind of helped me get through my deployment because I knew that that training right there showed me that I was more prepared than I ever thought. I was because it was so much easier. Luckily. I never had to use full overtraining because in a real vehicle, it's not as smooth of a circle around and around and there's a lot more. Free stuff flying around that could hit you. So even though a real-life incident would be different having that training and knowing how to get out of that situation would make an impact How likely you were to survive an incident like that. That was one of the things that I learned early on in my air force career. Is that the training even though it may not be exactly like real life it is Important and it will help you in the long run the second thing that I wish I would have known before I joined the military is that you can do this. One thing that would have helped me in the start of my career in the military was the confidence that I could do it Fear Can often paralyzed us from taking that leap of faith, but the military often doesn't give you a choice to let fear stop you from doing anything you have to jump in and do it, but there are certain situations during my training where I Why didn't volunteer or didn't step up because of the fear that I might make a mistake or that I might do it wrong. And I wish that I had taken the courage to take that step forward and not be so afraid going to Afghanistan with the Army and an infantry unit taught me so much about how I can do so much more than I ever expected and I didn't have a choice the military told me that's what I was going to do. So I It and I did really well and I did better than I expected and I did things that I never expected to do speaking of Afghanistan the first time that I rolled off base to do my first mission outside the wire which is off base with the people of Afghanistan. I didn't know what to expect. I didn't know what war meant and I didn't really know what was going to happen. I for some reason isn't that you might get ambushed and I was really worried about what would happen if we got in a fire fight, but we were actually really lucky we the first place we went was to inspect a retaining wall that the Afghans were super happy about and they were very happy that they had helped them build this retaining wall to help protect the Village from when the flood Seasons game so they were more than happy for us to be there. We Actually parked outside of the village and then walked across the bridge and went down to where the retaining wall was. But then when we laugh the Afghans had told us you can come and park in the village. You don't have to walk across and we were trying to be respectful of their Village and not just come barging in but they were so happy that they made it really easy for us to get out of the village and we just walked across a Dry Creek bed and over a little stream and then n into the main Market Square and then hopped in our trucks and left and that was my first experience of being off base and it was not scary. It was actually really interesting and we got to see a lot of things see a lot of beautiful things the hardest part of that day was getting used to wearing my gear again. We ended our training about two weeks before we actually left to go to Afghanistan and then it took us like a week To to get from Indiana and then all the way to Bagram which is in Afghanistan. And so there was a good chunk of time where we weren't really training and I had to get re adjusted to wearing all my gear again. And so that was the hardest part of that mission if you choose to join the military know that you will go through tough situations, but also know that you can do it the military will give you the tools that you need through the different trains that You have to go through and the different additional trainings. Like I went to four months of training before I deployed to Afghanistan. And so that was a additional training that helped me get through my time overseas. So don't doubt yourself when you're at training be confident and if you fell at the training environment, that's okay. That's where you're supposed to fell or supposed to learn. I wish that I had been more willing to step outside my comfort zone. That boot camp and at my training in Indiana because I would have learned more and I would have had more opportunities to learn and grow if I just been a little bit more Brave to step outside my comfort zone you can do it. You don't need to be afraid and you shouldn't let the fear stop you from doing it one of the obstacles. We did at boot camp. We had to climb up a backwards-facing ladder and I did find going up to the top and I wasn't even Worried about doing this particular obstacle, but when I got to the top you had to like flip over and then slide forward on your stomach and I got stuck. I was I was really afraid to make that flip. I don't really know why probably because I've never done anything like that before but I just kind of got stuck and paralyzed and luckily. I was one of the last people to go and I had the option of kicking my leg over and coming down pretty much the same way I came back up, but it wasn't the way that you were supposed to do the obstacle, but there were a few guys who climbed up to the top and encourage me and I at least I wasn't the only one stuck up there and the other ladies that were up there with me and they cheered us on and they coached us through how in how we could get over the obstacle and when I finally got to the ground I was so excited that I had accomplished it and I I could have easily just kicked my leg over and gone down the easier way, but I was glad that I had people there to push me to do something that I didn't think I could do. And that's one of the things that you'll learn when you go through military training is that things that you think you can can't do you can do and that's just one of the cool things about joining the military and being part of the service. So the third thing that I want people to know About or I wish I had known before I joined the military is that it will be hard but it is worth it. I think I kind of knew this deep down, but just to say it out loud and reiterate it the military is going to ask a lot from you. I have yet to meet anyone who has served in the military and said they didn't change in the process of going through boot camp and training and deployments and and whatever their situation is it changes you as a person even just the being far away from your family. I think can have a big impact on you just it's a different environment to be away from your family and having to do things on your own that you might not have had to do before. I always expected that I would deploy because when I went to fill training which is kind of like boot camp for officers They told us over and over and over and over again, that would be deploying within the first year of being on active duty. The first year of FD is really realistic but I did deploy within the first three years of being on active duty and I knew people who have deployed earlier than me when I got on active duty. I found out that Air Force civil engineers often deploy with the Army, which I wasn't really that excited about because I done some training with the Army and I wasn't really that excited about being part of the army. So that's why I was happy to be in the Air Force. So when I got an extra Duty and I knew my deployment could be with the Army. I remember telling people that I'll deploy but hopefully it will be with the Air Force but it wasn't how I ended up deploying with army and even more than Expected I didn't expect even if I was with the army that I would be going off the base because a lot of the engineers I talked to had done stuff in relation with the Corps of Engineers or maintaining the base overseas and not actually going out on convoys. So that wasn't something I expected and I would be lying if I said my deployment to Afghanistan was easy. It's one of the hardest things that I've done. In my life and definitely in my military career, it was super challenging and I wouldn't ever want to do it again, but it was worth the hard things that I went through. I've made some lifelong friends. It's changed me as a person and made me stronger and I can't say that. I regret the fact that I joined the Air Force even though I deployed with the Army and just the whole way my military career went. It wasn't what I expected. It was definitely harder than I expected, but it was definitely worth it and I'm very grateful that I had the opportunity to serve and even go on a deployment that was not really a typical type of deployment the fourth thing that I want you to know about the military is that your friends will become your family. I didn't realize how important the person sitting next to me would be from the I walked into the Reserve officer training Corps Detachment at my college. I knew there was something that was different about the place that I was in I didn't really know what it was but I felt this weird sense of belonging that I can't explain and it was a place that I met my husband and made friends that I'm still friends with today and just it changed my life and that was just the beginning. Inning when I went on active duty. I moved from California and my hometown which I had never lived outside of and move to New Mexico. And there there was a group of second lieutenants and we would spend almost every weekend going to different peoples houses doing movies nights going there wasn't a lot to do in the town. So maybe we just went to each other's houses, but we had so much fun together hanging out. Getting to know each other and I think it was kind of well some of those people were in college and they were away from their families, but still you aren't in college anymore. So you're out on your own and it was just a great place to support each other and grow up together. And then I mentioned earlier that I made lifelong friends through my deployment and three of the people I was going to say for but they forced me three other people. Will that I ended up deploying with I'm really close with and we've done meetups to see each other in different parts around the country. We used to all not live in the same state now two of us live in the same state, but we're not that close to each other but we text we support each other and just the friendships that I have from that part of the deployment is one of the main reasons that I look back on my deployment as a good thing because Is those friendships have meant so much to me the past well, it's been a long time. I got home in 2010 so nine years. So my advice to anyone who's joining the military is take time to invest in the people that are around you the people that you meet and the people that you get to interact with. They will become like your family if you invest in a friendship that way not everybody is a safe person to get super close with so just be cautious. Has or not naive so but most people I would say in the military are good people to be friends with and to connect with the fifth thing. I wished I would have known before I joined the military is that your weakness may actually be your strength. I am shy and I'm quiet and I'm introverted which is kind of funny because I have a Cast and I talk to people a lot but those are things that are very true about me and they were even more true when I joined the Air Force and a lot of times introverts and quiet people are seen as like a negative part of your character when you're in the military because people are loud people make a lot of decisions. They just allowed person and a charismatic person is a helpful trait to be in the military, but Introverts are in a very important part of the military because we look at the world very differently than extroverts. I know I've learned a lot about my personality and I like to process things and sit back and watch and that was a very helpful for boot camp. But when I was in my job, I could listen observe and provide really deep and meaningful feedback that some people Not be able to see because they just work charging forward with a mission. So I kinda had to overcome some of my sitting back and watching to get through the boot camp part, but it ended up being that being an introvert sitting back and being quiet was an asset later on in my career. So don't think just because you're different or you don't excel in one area or another that it means that you don't have value to provide to the Military the military really needs all types of people and all types of personalities. One of the cool things about being in the military is that people are so different they come from so many different types of backgrounds and cultures and race and ethnicity so we can learn from each other and it can change how we view the world and how we can fix problems that come up in front of us because that's just one of the great things about the military. So your Weakness might actually be a strength at bootcamp. It might feel like it's a weakness and that you weren't meant to be in the military, but it's actually some people do really well at bootcamp and some people just get by so as long as you can get through it and be mentally tough and strong enough to get through all the challenges that you face then that's okay. Just keep going and your strengths will show through the sixth thing that I wanted to mention for something that I wish I would have known before joining. The military is deployment is hard but good. I remember when I first went on active duty. I met some people who had come home from a deployment and they were so excited about their deployment experience and I was really confused because being away from family being in a war zone. It sounded like why are these people all excited about Their experience of deploying but the truth is when you're deployed the mission of serving your country is in the Forefront of your mind and sometimes if you're lucky you can make a real impact on the people that you're working with or working for and so deploying can be a really positive experience. Also memory is great because with time you forget the harder parts of of being deployed and you remember the good part A lot of the stuff that happened during my deployment that was really hard and difficult to get through. I don't have as strong a memories as the good things that happened while we were deployed like the movie nights and the barbecues and the other fun things and I don't have as many memories or maybe they're just a little bit fuzzy memories about some of the difficult people that I had to work with and some of the difficult Instead I had to go through I definitely don't remember the time that I got shot combat. I mainly know most of the pieces of that experience because I wrote about it when it happened. And so I kind of I don't know. I maybe I blocked that part of my experience out, but I don't really think about that or remember the emotions or the feelings. I was really afraid to deploy because I was Did that I would die. That's one of the things that is possible or be injured or just have my life forever changed, and I think that is normal from people that I've talked to you that I'm not the only one it's normal to be afraid. It's normal to worry about not coming home. It's normal to worry about the people around you who may or may not come home, but you can have a great experience. From the point you can learn a lot about yourself. You can learn a lot about the people that you work with. You can learn a lot about the country that you are deployed to and it's not as bad as you think sometimes. Sometimes it can be really bad, but I don't know how to say it. I mean some deployments to be honest. Some of the points are pretty much all bad and they can stay with you long after you're home. Um, and so deployments. I think there's always a silver lining of something that you can grow from and you can learn from but that doesn't mean that coming home from a deployment. You won't have any struggles or you won't have to get counseling or do some sort of recovery program. PTSD is a real thing. I don't go into Panic rooms. I really wanted to do the void experience. That was Star Wars e at Disneyland before we moved but I was really kind of stressed out about moving and I could already tell from the q's I learned in counseling about how my body felt that it wasn't a good situation for me to be in because I didn't know exactly how I would react so it's not that everything from a deployment is good. But I do look back and say that I grew a lot I learned a lot. I changed into a stronger person and overall. I'm glad that I was given the opportunity to deploy and serve my country and just make a difference but that doesn't mean that it won't stay with you. And the last thing that I wanted to talk about four things. I wish I would have known when I joined the military was how much you change when you join the military. I talked a little bit about it earlier about how when In you serve in the military? No one that I've talked to says. I'm exactly the same the training that you go through is intense and there's not really any other word to say what the training of either Boot Camp or officer training, whatever sort of military training that gets you into the military is it's intense they'll be yelling. They'll be lots of physical training which is working out doing push-ups sit-ups running. I'm marching all kinds of stuff but that process helps you to grow and change into a new person and you just aren't quite the same. You see the world a little bit differently, especially if you deploy overseas because you will go to a place in the world that most people haven't had the opportunity to see I went to Afghanistan and I of people living in mud huts and growing crops that they ate and just children who barely had clothes on and it was a it is a third world country and it's so different than America and it changed how I view the world it changed how I spend my money one organization that I really love to give money to is Kiva because They do micro loans and so my husband and I have decided to give them money and then we give people all over the world money and it's alone so they pay us back. And then once we get money back from the people giving a loan we can make another loan. So we don't we often don't give more money. We just reinvest the money that we already had but I don't think I would have been So interested in supporting a program like this had I not been somewhere outside the United States and to see the real proverty and the way the rest of the world lives and how much I can do with these micro loans to change and impact their lives. The military is going to teach you about different people. I think one of the cool things about the military, is that when you I mean, you're not that you can't see race because you can see that everybody is different but you have a mission and you have a goal and you have to do whatever that is. So it kind of you don't care about what the person's political or religious beliefs. Are. You just know that person is the person we call them wingman in the air force that you can rely on to do whatever work needs to be done to meet the mission and it kind of Of is a different way to operate than the way a lot of the world looks at things and just treats people. I know that when I find out someone is a veteran I can have a conversation with them for a long time and we can just talk forever male-female. It doesn't matter doesn't even matter. If we're in the same Branch just we have that connection of the military and it's something that's really cool because We can disagree on a lot of different things but that doesn't change the fact that we are the same in a lot of ways and we just view the world a little bit different and we have this community of those who have served that connects us together and it's a pretty cool thing. This is all I have for this episode. I just wanted to give people a little look into things of like how I've learned from being in the military. And what I wish someone had told me before I join I might have rambled a little too much, but hopefully you enjoyed this solo podcast. I'm going to try and start doing them at the beginning of every month just because I've had a few people request that I try it out. So we'll see how it goes, and I can't wait to see what you guys think. So have a great week. Thank you for listening to this episode of women of the military make sure to subscribe so you don't miss any of the Amazing Stories I have with women who have served in our military. Did you love the show? Don't forget to leave a review. Finally. If you are a woman who has served or is currently serving in the military. Please email me at Airmen to Mom at gmail.com so I can set you up to be on a future episode of women of the military.
There was a lot I needed to learn before I decided to join the military. You might know that before I started looking into the military, I didn’t know anything about it. I didn’t know the difference between officer and enlisted. I even remember when a friend recommended, I talk to someone, he happened to be a col, I called him by his first name when I went to his office and was quickly corrected. At the time I thought the way they responded to my mistake was a little dramatic, but now I know that Col is more than just a job title. Now, I have a hard time not calling my past commanders with their rank that no longer applies to their name. So, you could say I knew nothing about the military and little did I know how my life would change when I decided to join the US Air Force. Listen and hear what I learned while serving in the military and how I hope to use the information I have learned to help others who are considering joining the military. This episode was inspired by  7 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Decided to Join the Military Mentioned in this Episode Kiva.org Connect with Amanda Hear Amanda's Military Story - Episode 2 Check out Amanda's Blog: www.airmantomom.com Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Are you considering joining the military? Check out my free guide: A Girl's Guide to Military Life 