Hey guys, this is Lisa and Rebecca and we are here on the secret life of weddings. If you like drama, you're in the right place where we tell you the world's craziest, but true wedding stories. So get ready for the drama on the secret life of weddings. Hey guys, it's episode 102 of the secret life of weddings podcast with Lisa and Rebecca. You're a friendly Canadians here to tell you all the wedding trash you need. And put yes, and what else is up? What's going on with you Rebecca this week, you know, my kids are in exams. And so that's busy and stressful fun time. Yay, fun fun times and the kids are going to be off. My kids are gonna be off school as of Friday next week. So pray for me. We're praying for everybody. You know what though? Dude? Listen, I don't have to get up anymore to get them to school. That's a blessing. Yeah, yeah for sure and let but you know what I do. I don't mind it because it gets my ass to the gym. So I dropped them off at school I go to the gym and then I care about my day. See that's that's a non-issue for me. So it really doesn't matter on my side of things. But by the way, though, I'm doing great. I'm still doing great on my tracking, you know, I have fluctuated a little bit and I came down a couple more pounds. I'm actually as low as I've been since I've started this despite our my lacks attitude over. Our trip to Nashville. So that is the biggest thing for me is keeping track of my eating and you know calories and things like that. So yeah, I'm keep it that's awesome. You've been on it girl. Keep an eye on it. Everybody else. Keep going. You're doing awesome little bit by Aaron you all a little bit by little bit, you know, yeah. Yeah, but yeah same I was so I've been trying to I had to tell you about this because such a stupid thing. And I'm sure this is something that everybody knows but me so I don't like spicy food. I never have I can take like a little bit of spice but it's not something I will ever order you always seem to order mild everything some things have two spies. I just cannot even eat. I'm just sensitive like all yeah ways pain. Yeah. I'm just a sensitive gal. Okay, so right I got hellofresh. Actually. Remember I got some free meals from you when and And then I ended up ordering a some weeks because it was so good. Yeah, and it's also good. But anyway, they ironically this episode is not sponsored by them. But we will have ones that are coming up. They're going to be sponsored by hellofresh. So pay attention in the coming weeks people. But anyway, the reason I'm telling you this is because yeah, don't order it yet. Don't for a copay for a promo code. But seriously, the reason I'm telling you this is because hellofresh is great because you know, you get to try new things that you wouldn't normally try right? Yes. Absolutely, I wouldn't go out and try something with a hot pepper in it yet when it comes in the meal and they tell you to put a little in for a little bit of spice. I'm gonna try it. So anyway, I did it at the time with hello fresh and it was fine yada yada yada and they said in the instructions like, you know, you can wear gloves to protect your hands if you want. So when I did with the hellofresh one, I had no problems. It was fine had a little bit of spice and I didn't have any issues with my hands. So I was like, okay and this was like one of those little red peppers. I don't think it's a Yeah, but it's like a red hot pepper. So anyway, I decided this meal was really good. It was like at I kind of dish so I actually you know, they send the recipe cards so you can you can remake it right? Yes, so I went to the store and I bought all the stuff and I found a very similar pepper was a little bit different shape, but you know, I thought okay. I'm in Canada. Maybe we grope different peppers. I don't know anyway, so I bought this little hot pepper that looked as close as I could get I wasn't about to go for the jalapeno. But I got a little red pepper and I cooked the meal so I cut it and again, I didn't notice any problem on my hands and like okay, so I make the little thing and it's spicier than the other meal and that's fine though. It's not so spicy that they can't eat it. I did enjoy it. Justin loved it. He loves a little spice. Everything's fine until I start touching my face. Like I normally would touch my face. My hands have been washed many times throughout cooking. And it fucking starts burning. I didn't know this was the thing and I touched like the inside of my eye. I touched my lips I touch like everything and I'm just like why is my face on fire? What the fuck? Is this sorcery? I don't understand and Rebecca. I bit my like I'm Simon a nail-biter. I bit like a hangnail or something my tongue fucking goes numb and I'm like, what the fuck? Is this and I took me a while to realize. Oh my God, it's from the pain must be from the papr it lat. It's still going. It's been almost a week. I swear to God. I touched my thumb today to my tongue and I've showered multiple times since I swear to God it went numb. You need milk the fuck when you eat like something really super spicy and you want to cool it down. You need either plain yogurt or Mel. No, I hear you. But are you saying I should dunk my fingers in milk at this point. Yes, I I legit don't yes that too. Yeah, but it's like ingrained in my hand. I can't not will come out. Well, how long is it gonna take? I have washed my hands like 40 fucking times and I have showers soap soap doesn't get rid of it. Right? Well apparently not and this is something I should put on the package but you know, I was dumb enough to think why would hellofresh say you can put on gloves to protect her like this thing is going to explode on this is why I but this is why people people who eat mild things Like me, by the way, it wasn't the hello fresh pepper. It was a pepper. She went rogue and bought on her own pair though the hellofresh did give a pepper and say you can protect your hands to avoid this shitshow. It's just I think the pepper just wasn't a strong. Oh my God, nothing ever like it I've experienced. So that's awesome. I'm it's something else but I honestly want you about the the pepper. I ate at a wedding, right? No. Oh Oh my God. Okay. What did you do since we're talking about hot peppers. I was shooting a wedding. Right and they had a lot of South Asian Cuisine, right which I generally enjoy and I do like a little kick to my food. So they had green beans which I've never had before like that cooked. That way I was going to say you've never had green beans before I thought I was a child, but I've never had them and they look like they had a little bit of seasoning on it. And I thought I'm gonna give these are all right, so I take them. And I'm eating and the next thing I know I stopped breathing what no joke, I I was I looked at the second shooter and I was like the tears were coming out of my eyes. Like I couldn't I couldn't catch my breath. I couldn't I was not brave things that not a bean. It was amongst the beans was this crazy hot pepper and I ate the fucker. Yeah, no was I think because I was just eating and I wasn't paying attention because I took a bean at first and took a little bite just to see how how spicy it would be and it wasn't it wasn't bad. Right and I'm sitting there so I wasn't paying attention. I was watching, you know, the dance floor and everything making sure I was aware of what was going on in eating and you know us we eat fairly quickly and we're not really are all we shovel it in like we yeah. Yeah, just I fuck. Ian soon as I know what it tastes like I'm good. I'm like shoveling right now. So anyways, I yeah, I couldn't breathe. I couldn't I honestly thought my my whole mouth my throat my face everything was on fire and I was just like like gasping for air because it was so hot and he was like, oh my God and everyone's like getting me milk. I was just gonna say did you like scream? Milk, no, I didn't because I couldn't even talk like I couldn't even and he like they figured out fairly quickly obviously in a hot pepper the like, oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God, you're not supposed to eat those and I'm like, how are they in the fucking dead? Why are they here? Why are they in there? Yeah. So I drank I put like I filled my mouth with milk and switched it around spit it out fill my mouth with milk swallowed it and it wasn't even cold milk which made it so much worse as like almost warm because they grabbed it from the The coffee station and yeah, it was bad. I thought I was going to have to go home. Like I was in so much pain like it was Unreal small clean socks. Like we want money back. She left our wedding. Why did you leave the wedding? Rebecca hot pepper? Oh my God that I was. Oh, wow. It was so bad. And so by heard of photographers injuring themselves. I've heard of them getting sick. I've even heard of like crazy crazy things never heard of a hot pepper taking down a photographer. Yeah, it was bad and they're like, are you gonna be? Okay we didn't tell I didn't tell bride and groom didn't tell any gaps. It was just me the second shooter and the servers that were working there and they were just like gonna be okay. I'm like, I don't know I sent my second shooter off to shoot the speeches because I was like, I just could not function in that moment your life. I think my fingers burned off. I have can't do it anymore. And you know me like, I guess I shoot a lot of like South Asian weddings. Laughs so I was every time I saw that dish I was like hell to the fucking know and I told everybody surrounding me and then I remember this one guest said to me. Oh, you're supposed to put the yogurt with it and I'm like no no, no, no nothing is saving me from that dish man. Nothing. You need to know what that was called. I don't know. We have any South Asian listeners, please tell us because I'm very curious to avoid this now. Yeah, it might yeah, it was not good. Not that I'm that adventurous if I ever see a pepper next anything. I'm like go away when I was pregnant. I loved spicy food like I would put Tabasco sauce on hot wings. You know, that's a good way to go into premature labor. Oh my gosh, I don't know what the draw was it was weird. But anyway, I know I'm a hard. No on the hot spice. I just can't do it. I'm aware totally. Yeah. Yeah, not not a fan. So I want you to do something for me. I feel like I'm like a ten-year-old honestly with this shit. You are a 10 year old but you know what? I'm going to be a good sport. Okay for our listeners be a good sport and don't try to figure out Just Go With It. Listen. Where do you get this crap for my daughter? Do not I do she does this shit to me. It's so wrong because it's a lot of them are very wrong just wrong. But anyways, great. All right. All right, I'll be a good sport. I will not think about it. I'm just going to be like hey, what's up? Okay. Okay after every sentence I say I want you to say addicted. I already understand it. Okay, when you drink too much alcohol you are addicted when you take too many drugs you are addicted. What hit you in the face this morning. That's a good one. If you if you do that to someone who's not expecting it, that'd be fun. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be fun. I wasn't expecting it when she did it to me. I'm like, that's so rude. She's got all the good dirty. Oh my gosh. She's terrible. Just so everyone knows in case you're new my daughter is not an eight-year-old or anything like that. She'sshe's not wholesome and she's not know. She's 15 so we should bring her on as a writer write. Oh my gosh. She's so funny. She makes me laugh all the time. She's so funny how she didn't she Those people who doesn't know she's funny. So she doesn't even need these little gimmicks and tricks and stuff because she's already funny. So do you know something else totally random popped into my head yesterday and I was like, this would be a good conversation for the podcast and like for our fans group on Facebook. This is what I think about when I have nothing else to think about you're just laying there looking at the ceiling in your bedroom. What pops into your head this pops into my head. If I could have a superpower, but it had to be like really boring really ordinary. What would I have what would I choose? And do you know what I chose? I'm already think this question is completely out of left field and random. So go ahead. I told you this is what I think about when I'm alone. I really boring superhero power. Yeah, but it's good. Listen, you ready boy, I would be able to always Know where things are. Isn't that called being a mom it well, no because I will then I'm bad at it. Let me tell you but like, you know when you're freaking out and you're like, where are my car keys or where did I leave my phone or where's the remote to the TV or anything? I lost my little camera recently. I was trying to find it. I would instantly know it's there. That's why I left it there. It's there that would be my ordinary superpower. I thought of another good one. Like do you what would you do like if you had what's funny that you say that because My whole family says they constantly say if Mom can't find it. It can't be found because I always seem to know where everything is or have an idea where it could be. Right? Well, I'm calling you now, they're gone because I'm a fucking dumpster fire when it comes to finding things like I do the thing where you put it in a safe place. Yeah, especially things like passport. Yeah, and and and then I can never find them again interesting, you know, like yeah. So I thought of another really good one. What's that? always knowing What traffic is going on isn't that the way he's out have it? Yeah, but actually in your head right so you don't actually have to look at anything. You just no interest so you just know to go this way because you're going to get there fast. Yeah, you'll never you'll never hit an accident again. You'll never hit traffic again. You just go. Okay. There's no stress. You look good word for the most boring superpower here power. Oh, yeah. I had another really good one. Okay, this is the last one. I'm treat ready. This is fat. I really I think you'll dig this one. You ready? Being able to cook without measuring ingredients. Okay, I can get behind that. Although I don't I'm not a measurer. I measure like my food cuz I'm dieting and stuff, but I don't measure ingredients. But Stacy same superpower could apply to dieting. I want to have two cups of this. You just take a handful throw it in its two cups by Magic because that's your superpower. You could technically you could give yourself that superpower and just be like I know Well, you'd probably be wrong. But but it would you I according to yourself. Are you wrong? You're just you're just in denial for Becca. It's seven cups and you know it but I hate measuring stuff out like one of the things I hate most I like cooking but I hate like getting the measuring cups and trying to do this and conversions and all that good. Yeah. I just want to fucking take a handful of something throw it in and it's exactly the amount. It should be for what I'm trying to cook. I'm Saying that would be awesome and an incredibly boring superpower very much. So but you're definitely not helping the world with that. What is the world needs really good chili, you know, maybe I can maybe I could help things. But anyway, I just thought that would be fun. Oh, jeez cuss. These are the things that creep into my weird little mind when I have nothing else to think about. All right, should we do in the news? Let's do in the news country singer Chris Lane and reality star Lauren Bushnell are engaged. Nobody knows them. Nobody cares. I love that. You don't even bother to ask me. I think you know, I'm there's got to be someone out there who cares that I'm giving this information. We have to have some like modern country fan. Yeah, you know, yeah the audience I don't I'm sure I've heard one of his songs at some point. I don't know who she is like reality star for where I didn't even look into it. I was just like there's no point because no one's going to care. Dude, I'm so old I don't even try with me but congratulations to you guys. That's really awesome. And I'm super well, this isn't wedding-related. I'm look I guess it could kind of be I'm super loving. Okay. I know everyone thinks I hate Taylor Swift. I don't hate Taylor Swift. Can I just say that again? Got you hate Taylor's I don't hate her. I hate how much our concert ticket prices are. That's right. You really hate ticket. Mymy. Yes. I hate how expensive tickets are two. It's it really pisses me off. Anyways, Taylor Swift's new music video. You need to calm down. I fucking loved what she did. I love would you as someone I love that. She's you know out there bringing more awareness. I love that. She's basically calling out protesters and shit. I fucking love it. I love that. Of course my boy Ryan Reynolds, isn't it? Love that? Okay. Is in there Katy Perry Ellen DeGeneres a ton of other folks from YouTube like YouTubers and stuff. So awesome. My daughter knows all their names. I don't so much anyways, but I love the mess again old. He's spreading with this new music video. I think it's fucking awesome. And I'm like seriously fist bumping her right now. Can you tell me a little bit about what the song is about what the video is about because I have not seen it. Obviously. It's telling well, it's well, it's about you know gay rights, you know, the lgbtq+ community and you know, like Like what does she mean by you need to calm down because what people are still freaking out right all better against are whatever it's wrong sure. They're protesting it and it's so funny. So I'm going to the Toronto gay pride parade this weekend and I'm super excited my God Rebecca. You're going to see so many Wang's well, I hope I don't see too many only because my daughters will be with me you will I accidentally saw so I live downtown and walked by it one time the you will see many let me tell you and I love love our friend Kim for I was talking telling her that we're going down to the parade and she's just like, you know, I just want to give you some advice. She goes there's going to be protesters there and I'm and I was actually shocked. Yeah, actually, I never hear about that because we live in Toronto and you know like not downtown but that's a big thing here first. I was shocked and then I was like, yeah. Yeah, I guess there would be when they're like sadly there would be when they're you know, what it is though. They don't give them it's great. They don't give them the media. So that's why you don't know about it because yes, and I'm so glad we don't give them the media. Anyways, she says just ignore them. She was they're not worth your breath. They're not worth your words and I'm like, you know what? That's solid advice men. She goes, there's no point. There's Quite saying anything she was just it's a battle you won't win. So yeah, I could see you picking a fight with the wrong prototype. I know you I'm like that's gonna be so hard not to say anything. Oh, no, it's good luck with that. Let me know how that works out for you and we'll talk about it the next week of the podcast and I want to know I haven't been to the Toronto Pride Parade. I've never been I'm going this weekend with my daughter's I'm super pumped about it. It's going to be fun. Yeah, it looks amazing. I've no I've never like I said, I've never gone I accidentally walked by one man. Yeah, and there was just some really creative costumes going on on the sidewalk. That's all and I wasn't even like right at the parade route. It was just remotely nearby. It was crazy. Yeah, it kind of takes over the city a little bit, right? Yeah, and I'm taking it one step further. Oh, what are you doing now are always going to be fucking shocked by this are you getting on a At naked because I can totally take sides to be like go Rebecca taken note off. Nobody needs to see this take out the girls. They are screaming to come out and fly. Yeah. Yeah. So my daughter has made me a shirt. Okay, and on the shirt, it says free mom hugs. I love that. Oh my God. Okay. I see this in the news. Now. This is a whole thing. Like there's a whole community of for free. I'm hugs but I love that I said to her I said I would like, you know, I've seen all the videos and everything and I said I was so upset by it. I know that I could I could never I can't I can't I could never do that to my kids. I know it hurts as a mother to see someone that has done that to their little one like and then I saw there's a group of Milton moms that are going down as a group to do that and I I'm going with my daughter's though, so I kind of To make it an army. So who I am. Yeah my one daughter she's making her short to well, they're both making their own shirts or whatever. But anyways, then I said I would talk she goes would you would you do something like that? And I said absolutely they know I'm not a big hugger. Oh, that's true. I hate. Oh my God, and I said, but you know what I said that I would do because I genuinely genuinely feel that there needs to be so much. More love in this world. No kid. Like I genuinely feel it to the my fucking Corps and I was like, yeah go for a bed make me the sure I'll do it and not not I don't feel I have to or anything like that. I actually really want to so, yep. That is this awesome. Not a hugger is gonna be a hugger. Yay. If anybody wants one go girl do it. Yeah, put our logo on the back free advertisement. So funny we Really mom hugs just and if no one wants a hug, no one was like that's totally cool too. But I just want people to know that like, you know, I'm here for you girl. That's so nice for anybody everybody. I'm so proud of you. That's so fucking awesome. And your kids are awesome. So good job Mama. Yeah my one daughter. She's like is it weird? If I put free sister hugs? I was going to suggest that and then I was late at all. I was gonna say like totally do that. I know if you're cool with that or not, but I was and I had that idea too and I was thinking that would be Cute. Yeah, I'm super cute. Really nice younger daughter. However, she's not a hugger so know she's like so my older daughter was like, oh I can I put free sister hugs and I'm like, well, you totally kind of you want to I'm like like third-party really proud of your kids right now. No, I uh, my kids are cool. They are cool. They're cool shit. They are the shit. So we've been hearing a lot lately about the whole Jimmy Fallon wedding fails, hashtag, which we get tagged on a lot. Yeah, and it's been wasn't it last year touched on this been ongoing for a while? These are new ones just for the record. Okay, cool. I didn't I didn't go back last year. Yeah, I think they're new so and so yeah, Jimmy Fallon essentially calls out, you know for wedding people to send in their wedding fails, hashtag wedding fails on Twitter. And obviously, this is a real good fit for our show. So it kind of worked out so this Well, we just want to say thanks to Tamara for giving us a heads up that this was going on again. She's on our fans group fancy secret life of weddings on Facebook's. Yes, and you can also join our flick chat Group, which is another way to chat with us. You can check the show notes for the link to that as well. So this first one is from Gus on Twitter when my brother got married his wife laughed uncontrollably throughout the ceremony because she had just found out that he was wearing Spanx under his tux. X oh my God, all I can picture not just for women everyone parently. I did not know that but all I can picture is a hairy man. I hairy hairy man in Spanx why a hairy man because it makes it funnier right? Can I oh my God would pay money like really good money for a video of a man trying to get in and out of Spanx. I bet there already is one. And guess what? I'm doing after we record I expected on my desk by Tuesday. I'm going to find one. Okay, Bobby from Twitter rope went to a destination wedding in the woods and had to share a cabin with a guy who brought his own personal Wi-Fi hotspot. So he could keep track of what Gordon Ramsay was up to every time I turn on my phone. It asked me if I wanted to connect to the Ramsey. Louder okay confession time. That was me and drag. Yeah. I have a Ramsey router to you know, there you go. Oh my God, that's that's yeah coming soon his arraignment. That's crazy. This is from Kim on Twitter. My hubby and I were married in Vegas. He danced and sang along with the music thinking we were rehearsing until the officiant pronounced us husband and wife. My hubby said Oh, okay. That was it. We celebrated 23 years this year. That's too far. Wow, that's funny and fun. I love it Christy wrote when the pastor asked for the Rings. My husband had them in a plastic ziplock bag. He said he didn't want to lose them but such a male thing to do. I actually thought that was smart to be fair are so practical. It's painful right like I mean, oh, Did he at least you drop it in sand your goes when you drop it, you know T at least bedazzle the bag or something. I don't know about that but little cursive writing with a sharpie anything. No, I love Ziploc bags. You probably don't know this about me. I love Ziploc bags. Really? Yeah, like I put leftovers and lose up lock bags. That's awesome. Actually. So Christmas comes. All I have to do is buy you zip locks. Okay deal got it. Got it. Jackie wrote on Twitter. My husband delivered his beautiful vows. I almost cried when he finished. I calm myself look sweetly at him and say ditto and that's why I'm gonna do that. That's a woman who just wants to get to the honeymoon so funny. I love it. Oh my gosh as photographers. I don't know how many times you showed up to a wedding Rebecca, but there would be like missing ties. I don't know suit jackets to be the wrong size always there's always a mishap with someone suit and we have a new sponsor generation. Tux who have solved. These problems, you know, you have everybody running around like crazy. You picking up the suits before the wedding day. You got guys flying in inevitably there is a problem with the suit with generation. Tux you go online you order it and it actually gets shipped to your house like a couple weeks before the wedding. So you size everything make sure it's perfect. If the jacket is too big or something like that. All you do is tell them they send you another one. Yes, you can rule out all issues ahead of time. You know, it goes to all the groomsmen homes separately. It doesn't have to go to one location and then To the party you simply throw everything back in a box use the prepaid labeled and drop it off at a UPS. So easy, there's free round-trip shipping free swatches free home try on and free rental for the groom with five paid rentals. They even have a wedding planner program to assist all of you wedding planners out there. That's awesome. So, let's save the time save some money and most importantly save your sanity by checking out generation talks.com secret. Don't forget to use promo code. It's a secret for 10% off. So I found some stories of course good work Rebecca. That's what I love about you your I did my job to follow through again a hundred and two episodes in a row. Congratulations on your record and it was how I was about jewelry store workers. Oh, that's a fish on drama during engagement ring shopping. That's a good category. We've never done right? Yeah. You can create up here. It's titled. He tried to do the right and paid a huge price. So about 10 years ago. I was in my early 30s still working for my dad at the jewelry shop. He owned his health was declining. So I had pretty much taken over the duties of running the shop a young couple came in that looked about 20 and they told me that they wanted to get married and wanted to look at engagement rings. I went through the normal line of questions. What kind of style what's your price range Etc and through all of Of it. I could see that the boy was just so happy that he didn't care. The girl was so extremely picky and rude and the boy just wanted to make her happy. She ended up picking out a said that was worth about $8,000. I could see in the boy's eyes that he probably didn't have the money to pay for it. But he agreed that he would come back. He came back alone about a week and a half later with eight thousand dollars in cash. Oh my God. I'm not one to turn away. Money, but I couldn't help but ask him where he got it. He said that he sold his car that his father had bought him for graduating from college to pay for the ring. Oh, I told him that it was a big thing for him to do but he was an adult so I didn't try to talk him out of it. And anyway about four months go by and the girl comes strolling back into the shop except this time. She's with a different guy. Oh, no, and it was the same. Exact story of both of them wanting to get married and they were there to pick out a ring. I was in complete disbelief that this girl was with somebody else and was pulling the same strings that she did for the other guy. It made me so angry because I remember the other guy that had sold his car to make her happy. I bit my tongue for the most part but through little snide comments here and there like, hey, you look familiar. Have you ever been here before? She denied all of it? Of course, she picks out another ring the whole set was worth about 4,500 the guy agrees that he'll come back and I'm in complete disbelief of the deja vu that I'm experiencing. Wow, but then it gets worse. The girl asks me if I buy use drinks. Oh, no, my blood instantly started to boil, but I kept my composure and told her that I did she then pulls out you guessed it the ring. And that I originally sold to her ex that she conned. She said that it was her grandmother's ring who recently passed away and I just snapped I said, huh? That's weird. You said your grandma owned this ring because it looks exactly like the ring that I sold to your ex-fiance a few months ago. She turned beet red and got absolutely furious with me cussing me out saying that I was a liar Etc then. She looks at her current boy toy and says well do something. He looks at her looks back at me hesitantly and apparently her spell of Seduction was strong enough that he decided that lunging at me was a good idea. He caught me with my hands down at first and knocked me back into a cabinet which shattered while I was down. I managed to trip my silent alarm. He then came at me again, and I managed to get a couple of shots in we're going Toe to Toe for a good 30 seconds when suddenly I felt a warm sensation on the left side of my back around where my kidneys are I was in shock and it was like in the movies where I touched the area and brought my hand back up covered in blood and complete disbelief. Oh my God, the other guy was in disbelief to and stopped attacking me. I turn to my side and there stood the girl with a freaking knife in her hand. She stabbed me. Oh my God. I thought the glass around. Back like for sure when the when the reality of what happened said in I got extremely dizzy from all of the blood loss and fell to the ground. They ran outside only to be apprehended by the police. I was taken to the hospital and later found out that she had lacerated my kidney and I was a lot closer to death than I originally thought. Oh my God. Girl that took a dark astern. I know Lee sorry. It was too good. I'm like we have to share this. I was like, this is amazing. It's like a movie. Oh my God. I really wish we had like a hellofresh out to go into right now. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's crazy who Breanna knife to of bring appointment? No, that's crazy. She's packing apparently. Oh kidding shopping fucking crazy. Wow. So if you're like me, you have some form of anxiety or depression or just something on your mind that you feel is holding you back from really I don't know going forward in life achieving your goals better help online counseling is here for us better help is available worldwide and you can connect with a professional counselor in a safe and private online environment. You can chat with a Pist via video or phone or use chat and text I'm loving that they have text chat. I'm better at writing down my feelings and my thoughts than I am speaking them better help is secure. It's convenient and the therapists are incredibly professional although licensed professional counselors are specialized in areas of depression anxiety family conflicts relationships lgbtq matters and so much more best of all guys. It's a truly affordable option. So all the secret life of weddings listeners are going to 10% off their first month with discount code The Secret Life of weddings. So why not get started today go to better help.com the secret life of weddings discount code The Secret Life of weddings. Take care of you today God. That was corny. Ha ha so we have an update to our shitty sister Saga. That was we do on the show recently. So if you don't know what I'm talking about before you listen to this part go back and find I think it was just a A two-part Saga wasn't super long. So yeah, it was called I think shitty sister. So I have been out of the country and haven't listened to Parts two or three but just downloaded them for the plane ride, then I remembered. Oh, so I guess there's three parts. Yeah, because this is from listener. Don't forget guys. So this is what our listeners saying is she wrote in again then I remembered I got married so you probably need an update also. She is two years younger. Almost to the day. So again, let's just remember if we were wondering how like what the Aged that's right. So she's two years younger than her sister who's getting married who was getting married. This sister was the one who, you know got drunk pretended to be sick didn't show up at the bachelorette. She was just really self-centered, right? Yeah, that's kind of a good summary and the mother as well was like really enabling of the behavior wasn't she? Yes. Yes, okay. I left off with my sister announcing that she was getting back surgery the week of my wedding. That's right. Thank God. I have one sane parent my Dad shut that shit down real quick. He/she has rescheduled her surgery until after she graduates in a year and a half. So she got she could like wait a year and a half yet. She did it like two days before your wedding. Wow, that's crazy attention attention seeking much cheese people that required that much attention. I worry about them. Yeah, they got problems. We really didn't talk after the bachelorette party for almost two months. She called a couple times. I answered once and all we talked about was a new restaurant opening on her way to school. So I decided to just ignore the calls. I work all of the time and ours are weird. So it was easy to blame that well two weeks before the wedding. My sister called me out and said she had been trying to call. I stated very matter-of-factly that I didn't want to have. Have shallow conversation when she can't find the balls to apologize sister gave half-assed reasons why it was hard for her to apologize me being me. I just kind of Let It Go all of it forgive and forget. She's really bigger. Good. / you're such a good person. I would not be the weekend before the wedding. My mother starts getting on me about my plans for wedding week. I tell her I have stuff all Saturday and all Sunday. I think Sunday and some small things on Thursday and Friday when I get down there the first thing out of her mouth sister gets in Friday night. So you need to go get your nails done Saturday morning so we can all go together. Now. I had plans starting at 9:15 to pick up one of my bridesmaids from the airport run a couple of errands and do a makeshift welcome lunch at the beach with all of our friends. When did she expect me to find time before our to p.m. Rehearsal together? Get our nails done. I said that simply wouldn't work and that she can go with sister that morning, but I will need to go Thursday. Mom throws a small fit. But ultimately I put my foot down. I made my nail appointment and told her she could join if she wanted then I tell Mom about my Friday night dinner plans with my matron of honor who lives in Japan and her best friend who lives near my mom and we are also friends so that matron of honor will get to see her friend while she's in the country. This again won't do since my sister gets home Friday night and she invited to families to have dinner at our house and I need to worry about entertaining all of my guests that traveled not just my best friend family one lives in Tampa and I see them every time I go home every other month and family to lives close to my home and is notorious for being late dinner was supposed to be at 6 and they showed up at 8:30 granted. They had an eight-hour drive still in my opinion. I guess like it's not cool. I gave in on this one and told my matron of honor to go have fun fast forward to Saturday the day before the wedding me and my then fiance were planning on picking up our bridesmaid and running the errands by ourselves since we had to leave so early. Nope sister got up early so she could come with us. They're like what Joy whatever not a big deal. We run our errands and when we went to check out at Publix she offered to pay what is Publix like a groceries at a grocery store. I've never heard of it. Okay Canadian. This is the same girl who didn't want to spend two bucks on a koozie. Now. She wants to spend $50 on fruit for us to have in the room. I tell her it's fine. I got it. Then she tells me my mom gave her two hundred dollar spending money for today. So she could cover us our activities included buying this fruit and going to a beach dive bar with friends couldn't have spent more. More than $75 between us three if we tried this in addition to the one who I was going to say invite me to the bar. I will help you. Yeah spend that money and it will be no problem. I really love those fancy cocktails that are like twelve twelve dollars each, right? Yeah. I'm very high maintenance when it comes to drinks. I love the fruity shit. I love the fancy stuff. Give me a cocktail with a little umbrella. I am a happy girl. This in addition to the hundred dollars. She got to get a mani-pedi that she pocketed and did the nails herself. All right, whatever trying to be the most chill bride ever despite these tests we go to the beach and sit at different tables doesn't really bother me at all until I stand up to go to the bathroom. She needs to go to great as we were walking in from the beach. I noticed there is a bathroom trailer think one step above a porta potty I start to go in and she starts yelling about how unsanitary it is. I state that I don't care. I just need to pee and sister states. She won't go in there fine by me I walk in and do my business and it is time to leave as all of the cars pull around I put her in another bridesmaid in the car with a groomsman. This groomsman did not pay for valet parking and parked in the third spot in the adjacent lat sister turns around to me and says you expect me to walk I say yes, it's 500 feet away. She goes on to suggest that he bring the car around to them. I tell her and the other bridesmaid that they can walk to the other car or find their own ways of the rehearsal everyone except the ring bearers who are two and were napping showed up to the venue for the rehearsal on time. I talked with my coordinator and the venue coordinator about what I wanted when it came to the ceremony the venue coordinator said that she would be the one directing everyone when to come out. She was a little soft spoken. So for the rehearsal so that everyone got a feel for it. I called it out parents first and our officiant escorting mom from the aisle. I was in the groomsmen and groom from a different style. The little kids bridesmaids me and my dad besides my coordinators. No one in the wedding party was paying any attention on when to go so I start of this is just our favorite part of the day when you're starting to like her. Corral wedding party, please. Do this nobody's listening and you're just like fuck my life. So I start yelling out. We were across a garden so I had to be loud when to go. Well my sister thinks it will look better if the littles follow the parents and start sending the three kids under five out. When I am yelling at the groomsmen to go. I look at her and tell her no and the flower girl thought I was talking to her cute ears forget I so my sister if she doesn't Know what she's doing. Then there is no need for her to talk the rest of the rehearsal. I didn't hear you can stop talking now. I didn't hear a peep out of her until it was time for us to go out that night. Someone had a brilliant idea to sneak. Our seventeen-year-old musician would have been a bridesmaid of she was older into a 21 plus bar. I tell sister to stayed back about 10 minutes or use another door so that they don't get caught she follows. Has two people behind the 17 year old who was also using her ID. They both get kicked out and she texts me and tells me to go with her to the bar next door. I invited all guests under 45 to come out with us. No way. I was leaving all of my friends especially since fiance was having his makeshift bachelor party when he was supposed to come out with everyone The Men Who I text back that I wasn't going to do that put my phone away and That with everyone at midnight we go back to the hotel to find her sitting in my room. She was in the second room sobbing. I asked what was wrong and she blubbers about how she wanted to hang out with us and is so upset that she didn't get to and that she didn't want to give the seventeen-year-old the ID and we didn't you get it. It wasn't her fault. I tell her it's fine and climb in my bed. Wedding day was fairly uneventful that's actually like an accomplishment and a half for their prey. Yeah. Seriously, I'd say she made my mom's which hair times with her because sister didn't want to have her clip-ins along. It was an extra hour besides that she was smart and any questions she had she just asked through a different bridesmaid and she stayed far far away. That is very very good idea. I am sure one day everything will be better. But as of right now things are Still rocky with sis Mom has left me alone the past two weeks. So we are good and I am married and just getting back from my honeymoon. Sorry for the second Saga don't apologize girl. Thank you for being a place for us to vent and share stories and I can't wait to keep following the series. Love you all. Thank you. The your series your Sago is great. Your Sears was great. Like thank you so much for sharing it with us. You are absolute Peach. Each and we love the update because you know, we all love update and we never get them. So yay. Yes exactly gay for updates. Whoo. So back to Jewelers confessions murderous was like murder murder kill times. Whatever is going on apparently jewelry stores. Did you ever see that video speaking of George Jewelers did you ever see that video of the woman who is like pranking Jewelers and she Walk in I think it was in China she would walk in and she'd be looking at a ring is I did and then she'd start walking towards the Exeter running and see what they would do and a lot of them fucking jumped the counter and just bolted after her and yeah, but then she'd stop look so funny so funny. Oh my God, I'd be so mad if I was the person working at the store, I'd be so mad. So putting that in the thread for this week's episode in our group. So if you want to see that go to our Poop on Facebook because he should put it because that that was that was awesome. That was so yeah so good. Okay. This one's called she faked them out. There's a group of ladies out there who thought I was serious when I did this. Oh my God, this actually sounds like I'm talking about the story. We just talked about right a local jewelry store was closing down and they were holding liquidation a liquidation sale. So my boyfriend and Popped in to check it out. He heads immediately to the watches and I'm drawing the Rings. I'm not even going to the ring section. Don't even think about it and I'm browsing the Rings. He finishes first comes over to see what I'm looking at and does a Homer Simpson and slowly backs away if I can do the bushes Madge I threw a fit I don't even remember what all I said something like, oh you can Look at a $700 watch but you can't even glance at a ring for me. If you don't want to marry me just say so and I stormed out of the store. He followed concerned only to find me laughing my tail off. Thankfully we have the same sense of humor. So he found it funny too, but he still hasn't put a ring on it. And you know what? I bet you will find that Jewelers story in Reddit saying it how that happened. Probably probably and probably, you know security video, right? As that's great. So this week for Double D's we are doing what dating? Yes, so these are some of so Jimmy Fallon of course has dating fails or I can't remember the hashtag and this was a couple of them. Jimmy's right up our alley a Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy seriously, so couple dating fails for you quick and dirty like we like them. I once took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name. You know what that's a fucking brilliant. I might use this one day. Oh my God if I ever that's fucking amazing if I ever forget if I ever have like a business transaction or something going on, let's just go to Starbucks malice, but then you have to be like you by right because they'll pour you be like her no, well my for my drink I want it Rebecca and then you turn to the me go you Something that or just say it for my drink I for our for my, you know, very bare refresher with lemonade. Can you put Rebekah on it? And then let them talk or do you know what that would do is slide is slide to the side. I don't think the yeah, that's true. You have to really prompt them. But just in case I might do the here's my card to pay for it. I got to go to the bathroom here and plop it down and run and let them give the name and then no matter what the name on the cup is going to be there's true unless they like got a real funny. You know wanted to write like mr. Smelly pants or something stupid like that. Right? Can I just say I think I've told this before but I don't know if I did or not and it was one of the sweetest cutest things a client ever did for me and it's kind of on topic. So before we forget I was at a shoot an engagement shoot for one of my clients and I had my assistant with me and my clients got us Starbucks, which was you know, in and of itself a really sweet gesture so they were getting Starbucks because cuz they were going to use them as like, you know, a little props or something like that. Yeah, which is really and and they're just awesome people so they went in and got us our orders and on my cup they wrote world's best photographer and on my assistants cup there world's best second or you know assistant or some but it was just the ski is like it gave me goosebumps, you know nice and I'm just saying if you want to like practically make your photographer cry. Yeah, I don't Starbucks and have them have Starbucks right that on the cup because seriously it was like cute. Yeah, you never left my heart, you know. Yeah a little thing for us. So yes, so back to the shit show. The next one here date was so bad. I gave the waiter 20 bucks to spill my drink on me to get me out of there that's desperation. That is amazing desperate to get out speaking of desert. Would just be like I'm done here. Seriously, we're done speaking of desperate. I'm re watching Desperate Housewives now. Oh, are you I am I'm re-watching. I watched it years ago and I am I have Amazon Prime right now. I've decided to re-watch it. It's awesome because I remember like nothing. Well, it's actually shocking how little I remember. Yeah, you know, how you re watch a show and you're just like, oh, yeah. I remember that. I right. Yeah. It's like I'm experiencing. I'm only on season two and I'm experiencing a lot of like did I even watch this properly? Yeah before kids I think but I do like so when I'm falling asleep to fall asleep, and I this has this not be cut Big Bang Theory is bad or anything like that. I watch reruns of Big Bang Theory, uh-huh to fall asleep to right and there was one on last night that I had. I don't recall seeing and I was like that's impossible. I've seen every single episode and more than once and I sat there and I sat up watching it and I'm like, whoa. Well this defeated the whole purpose of this right now because if I were you if it's something I've seen already I generally will fall asleep because I know what happened. Yeah, you're not getting attention as much as you yeah, but this one I didn't see and I was just like damn it. No. All right. Don't recall seeing it. But yeah, Justin can go to sleep. Like he has to go to sleep watching something but he can all be new I can't I will pay attention to it. I will listen. Yeah. Yeah. Nope. Not a thing I can do now same. Yeah. It's kind of crazy. It was ugly. So anywho, yeah, can we thank Charlotte Solomon. Yes. Holy shit. Do you think Charlotte last week does Charlotte? I'm so fucking Charlotte Charlotte Solomon Charlotte Charlotte. Give us Charlotte. We adore you forgive us Charlotte's are wonderful fabulous producer that helps make the show possible. If you want to become a producer as well patreon.com slash secret life of weddings to become a producer get episodes early. The show anything if you enjoy the show, if you enjoy the show you owe us. No, I'm fucking kidding. But seriously, if you want additional episodes things like that, you can go over and sign up Rebecca K is our new Patron this week. So thank you to Rebecca your namesake my God. I think I like you Rebecca. She likes you already and massive. Thanks to Charlotte as well for this week and last week where we forgot to mention you. Yes. Oh my God, so we just wanted to quickly make one final blanket statement to make sure everybody knows what we feel in our hearts to be our message. Is that or our philosophy? Is that is that a good way to put it sure and because I don't say anything as well as I should or explain things as thoroughly as I should. Good Rebecca has written this out and I am fully behind it and go we would like to take the opportunity to address this as we want to be clear that we support inclusivity and equality for everyone for real guys. We really do in this goes for do not cast life that we live on and offline and our Facebook group, especially and flick shot. We do not want to censor anyone or diminish views or beliefs on the political front. We're not trying to silence you we hear you and apologize for making anyone feel their voices are not heard or valued. It definitely was not Our intention milk, and we apologize and we love you all and we hope you understand view have so much love in our hearts for everybody and we just want just want y'all to get along and be happy and I know you guys you know, there's so much you're up against in your daily lives, especially in America and sometimes, you know in Canada often we have this too, but we just don't want to Assume we know about your struggles. So thank you for being supportive and understanding we're trying to be supportive of view as well and your yes and your challenges in life and everything and we love and respect to you and thank you so much for making our show a success. We really wouldn't be here without you if it wasn't for you guys listening and recommending to your friends and your good reviews. We wouldn't be doing it still honestly. So every email we get I smile. I really do. Thank you so much for everything. And Rebecca anything can happen at weddings and we will be here to tell you all about it. Well, that's it for us this week on The Secret Life of weddings podcast. If you need more drama in your life go over to patreon.com slash secret life of weddings to sign up for additional weekly episodes. The first few episodes are free. So go check it out patreon.com slash secret life of weddings, and we will see you here next week.
The latest Jimmy Fallon #weddingfails, jewellery shop confessions and we hear a full update on the Sh*itty Sister Saga! SKIPPERS - jump to 25:00 to begin the stories. Want more Secret Life of Weddings? Get some extra juicy stories exclusively available monthly on Patreon (the first few are free) plus early release ad-free main episodes every Monday over on Patreon! Become a Patron for as low as $3 a month & support the show at http://www.patreon.com/secretlifeofweddings Need suits for your upcoming wedding? Order for 5 groomsmen and get the groom’s suit free! Don’t forget - get 10% off your suits at GenerationTux.com/secret using promo code ITSASECRET Is there is something that interferes with your happiness or is preventing you from achieving your goals? BetterHelp online counselling is there for you. Connect with your professional counsellor in a safe and private online environment – it’s so convenient! 