Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : In my D&amp;D group's most recent session, the party fulfilled one of the party member's campaign goals by taking control of a castle that was previously held by bandits.

Over the course of the almost five hour session, our five person party fought our way through the castle while uncovering secret passageways, falling into traps, and getting the shit beaten out of us by bandits--you know, typical D&amp;D stuff--but the whole time the other  party member kept referring to the castle as "her castle" and instantly laying claim to the tens of thousands of gold worth of coins and items inside.

Relatively early on, I noted that I really liked one of the rooms in the castle, and when I was told that it was going to be her room, I told her that she would have to make some concessions (not just to me but the whole party) because this was a group project. I bring up the fact that restoring and maintaining the castle will be expensive and that pretty bluntly say that my character, who at the time had way more money than the others wouldn't be particularly interested in helping fund the other character's project if he didn't get anything from it. Not only was loot collection heavily constrained, but it was pretty strongly implied that my character and the other male party member wouldn't even get to live in the castle that we all helped take. As far as I can tell, I was the only one who was unhappy about this arrangement. 

As you can imagine, I was a bit miffed by all this and between the lack of loot and an extremely prolonged series of horrible attack rolls, my attitude was noticeably sour by the end of the session, but I never considered the idea that I might be the asshole until I was called out before the other player's vistory speech. The other player told me that she still intends to assist my character in his goal but that she didn't appreciate me threatening hers.

I suppose I could make excuses about how withholding funding is absolutely something my character would do or about how little my fiscal contributions would have mattered in the end (like I said, we found upward of 15,000gp worth of coins and items in the castle), but I'm not interested in using in-game reasons to justify this primarily out of game conflict. In the end it boils down to the fact that I was dissatisfied with how the other player was handling the mission and clearly stated my interest in taking action that would hinder her. 

Am I the asshole? And, if so, how do I go about making things right?

