Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : Using a throwaway for obvious reasons. I have been married for years, have 3 children, one is a teenager, the other 2 are 4 and under. My husband works, I stay at home. Am I being unrealistic in expecting a little help? I cook, clean, do all shopping, and childcare. I'm up with them every day, and I put them to bed every night. I love my kids, please dont tell me I shouldnt have had them. They are my world. My husband will on occasion bathe the younger two (maybe once a month?) He works a crazy schedule which requires him to work 12 hr shifts sometimes during the day, sometimes overnight. Regardless of work or not, I get up with the kids every day. On his days off, he gets up leisurely,  takes a shower, and joins us after. I spend a part of my day cleaning up behind him. He leaves his clothes everywhere (living room, all over the bathroom, our bedroom floor). He spends the day generally in the same room with us, but often on the phone either playing games or whatnot, unless football is on. I should be going to bed when the kids do, because I know I have to get up with them. But sometimes it's hard to just immediately fall asleep and I'm up until 11 or so (Kids are up by 6-7) . 

He doesn't like night shift, and has made it obvious he'd like to be off that shift. I tried to approach him today about either setting up a plan with his bosses or helping him look for a new job. He has a bachelor's,  I only have an associate's. His response was if I need a break, I need to get a job and put the kids in daycare. I just don't see that as a fix. Finally he agreed he would just do the laundry,  so I didn't have to. But it feels more like a tantrum than anything. He says anyone would die to be in my position. 

Let me say this, I love my husband. Hes a good dad. I know he loves his kids. 

I'm happy to give more answers, I honestly just want to know....is this right? Am I supposed to live day in and day out without a break, because he pays the bills? AITA for even bringing it up? 