Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST :   

Throwaway account. The background is that my bf and I are both in our early 30s, been dating a little over 6 months. He has 3 kids, I have 1. We have never met each other’s friends, family, or kids yet. I have been divorced almost 4 years. He has been living separate from and been separated from his wife for over 2 years, but they are just now officially getting divorced. This is a big point of issues for us, as I feel uncomfortable with him being legally married. I was aware of this when we first met, but once I voiced my concerns, he said it would be done immediately. Well, fast forward, and here we are 6 months later. However, it does seem to appear that they are actually working on this at this point. Anyway, my family members are either deceased or I have a distant relationship with them. I am kind of solo in the world. I feel really hesitant to meet my bf’s family because it seems like they’re all still so involved with her “ex” wife. The “ex” wife and one of his sisters work together. Every morning, the ex drops off their kids at his mom’s house, picks up his sister, and they go to work together. Then she takes her home, gets the kids, and goes home. He sees the ex daily. His brother is always doing various favors for her. He always tells me that he himself (bf) has “nothing to do with her” but I don’t see how he can seriously say that. I am not the type of person who thinks you can dictate others’ relationships. I would never say or think, hey, she can’t talk to your family. I just feel profoundly uncomfortable. It seems like they are all so close. Where would a new person fit into that? I have never dealt with a situation like this before. Am I the asshole for feeling uncomfortable about this? I dated a single divorced dad in the past, and although he remained close to his ex’s family (her mother and brother), it seemed like he had better boundaries. I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense. I’m trying to figure it out myself. I guess I just don’t see where I fit in and it makes me insecure. 