Repost without the whole conversation and added a TLDR.

So, background. I've been with my girlfriend for about 7 months now.

We both have difficult personalities due to difficult past, difficult previous relationships and upbringings. We're both oversensitive. During these 7 months together, we broke up more times than I can count. It usually only last a day or two and then we're back together because I really love her, and (I think) she really loves me as well.

We have a long distance relationship, I'm in France, she's in Germany, although our cities are close and a 2 hours train journey is all it takes so see each other. Last time we saw each other were for NYE, when she came over and spent a few days with my family and I.

Things were dire before that and we broke up for the nth time on December 24th. We managed to move on 2 days later. That's the event that she's referring to in the following conversation when she talks about Christmas.

Her exams are coming soon, and she's in over her head because she has so much stuff to do. Because of our break up over Christmas and her time spent at mine, she also wasn't able to study. She usually can't work when I'm around even though I can.

My birthday is on Monday, and I was supposed to go to Germany tomorrow so we can spend it together, and come back on Tuesday. Her birthday was two weeks ago on the 7th, I couldn't be with her because I had a work imperative, but I had roses and chocolates send to her. She really liked the gesture, and she was perfectly fine with me not coming because work was a priority. I offered last week to not come if she really had a lot of work this weekend (I've always been alone for my birthdays so they're of little importance to me) but she insisted that I did, but we'd have to work most of tomorrow. I agreed with that. The idea was we'd celebrate both our birthdays.

Earlier today, she mentioned that we really needed to work all day long, and when I asked if we could at least spend a bit of time together she suggested I should cancel the trip if we're not working 100% of the time. Which I did. And now she freaked out and is blaming me for cancelling the trip.

I've been quite selfish in the relationship in some aspects, and I've always done my best to change that behavior and place her needs before mine. However, I think in today's scenario, she really went too far, and she created the whole drama. To be fair, I think she has a lot of unresolved issues, and it's sometimes really hard to tell her she's doing stuff wrong because she won't accept it. I'd like to have some external opinion on this argument.

If you really want the whole details, the argument can be found here: [http://freetexthost.com/0s6xaqee1n](http://freetexthost.com/0s6xaqee1n). I'm Terry, she's Honeybee.

So, am I the asshole here?

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TLDR: Offered to go see my GF which I'm in a long distance relationship with tomorrow and monday for my birthday. Say she wants to spend the whole day work because she's in over her head for her exams. I say I'm okay to work but that I'd like to relax and enjoy each other's company for an hour or two. Answers that if we're not spending the whole day working, better cancel the trip. I cancel, and she blames me for cancelling and breaks up with me over that.

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