I’m (24f) hearing impaired. I have an Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), which is something like dyslexia for sounds. Everything sounds jumbled unless I’m super focused, and sometimes even then I can’t sort out spoken language from things like road noise. If you’re curious about what it’s like, try downloading one of those free “Speech Jammer” apps where they play sounds into your ears with one on a slight delay. It makes speaking and understanding quite difficult for me.

That being said, I was walking in a poorly-lit parking lot toward the Walmart. I normally turn to look at my truck when I press the keyfob to double check that I locked it (the rear lights flash.) But, I had already walked too far away from my vehicle and the fob didn’t make it flash. I knew I would just worry about whether I’d locked it unless I doubled back to check, so I started back to be within range. 

There was an officer in the parking lot. What it probably looked like to him was that I was walking toward the Walmart, saw him, and turned to run to my vehicle. In reality, I didn’t notice him, turned for a totally different reason, and then jogged the ten yards back because I’m a big worrywart. 

He apparently called after me and announced that he was a cop (So his lawyer said), but I had no clue. The parking lot is by a major road, so there is a lot of traffic noise. 

He caught up to me and grabbed me by the arm and pinned me against my truck. It being a parking lot at night, I assumed the worst. I yanked my arm free, and haymakered like my life depended on it, catching him in the temple. I really rung his bell, because he slumped against the tailgate.

I was terrified and in fight mode, because at that point he’d also totally have the grounds to shoot me since I’d punched him. 

Here’s where I’m morally conflicted: I was able to see that he was a cop and that I had already injured him, but I hit him five more times in the head. I’m opposed to violence outside of sport or self defense, but I knew he’d possibly pull his gun. In total, I gave him him a bad concussion, broke his nose, and fractured his eye socket. 

I called an ambulance and supported his neck until they got there.

The whole thing ultimately got settled out of public court. There was footage in the parking lot that very clearly showed him handling me roughly. Plus, I’m disabled, so I’m sure that would have looked really bad for the police department. 

He privately apologized to me a few months after the incident. 

I know the whole ordeal probably would have gone down a lot differently if I weren’t a tiny white lady...

I still feel bad about the amount of damage I caused. He now has some memory issues and had to retire early. Like, I generally dislike/distrust/loathe police, but I still hate the idea that I harmed someone more than I probably strictly needed to. 

TL;DR 
I don’t hear good, and a cop thought I was running from him. He grabbed me, and I punched him in the head. I was afraid of being shot, so I punched him more and now he has memory problems. Am I the asshole for having continued to hit him? 
