TL:DR My brother is essentially marrying someone that my family has never met and has not set a wedding date, and yet my family constantly talks about it and almost never brings up my engagement/wedding that ii only 4 months away.

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Hey all, I'll try to give some context to better understand the situation. Sorry in advance if I seem to ramble, this might get long but I want to give the details that I think matter and play into all this. I am 26 and my younger brother is 22.

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I am the oldest boy in my family and have 6 siblings (one older sister, one younger sister, one younger brother, two step-brothers, and a younger half-sister). So it's a mixed family but we are all close in age with exception of my half-sister, and we all get along pretty well. My full siblings and I were born a raised Mormon, and now that I have grown to adulthood I no longer practice within the church but still consider myself Mormon. Same thing for my younger sister. but my older sister and younger brother are still very active in the church and my younger brother served his mission, however I did not. 

For those not familiar with the ins and outs of the Mormon religion, typically young men and women at the age of 18 can choose to serve a mission for the church which means they can be called (sent) to almost anywhere in the world where they will learn the language and preach the Mormon gospel to the people of that area. It is a choice (although there is a high amount of pressure for you to do it, especially for young men) and I made the choice not to go on mine.  My younger brother chose to go on his and ended up going to Argentina to serve where he met his now fiance. But for more context understand that on a Mormon mission as a young man or a young woman you don't really spend much time with the opposite sex. You have a same sex companion (partner) that you live and work with to preach the gospel i.e. knocking on doors and such, and you may at times work with sister missionaries who also have a same sex companion to do group lessons and whatnot. But it is not like they are hanging out 2 on 2 in like a double date situation or anything. I might be wrong but I would guess that over the course of ones mission, you might get to spend in total maybe a couple of days worth of time with the same sister missionary but it would not be in like a hangout or date type setting. I say all of this because this is how my younger brother met his fiance and how he fell in love with her.

He served his 2 year mission and returned last year in February. We all met him at the airport to greet him as he walked out of the gate where within the first 5 minutes of reuniting with us he stated " I have a girlfriend and she lives in Mexico" (which is where his fiance was from, she was just also serving her mission in Argentina). We kind of chuckled and said sure (not knowing how serious he was) and continued to ask him about his mission and experiences. He then says later that day that he his planning on flying down to Mexico to see her in the next couple of weeks. He does this a few times actually and in about a month or two after returning home he flies to her again and proposes to her. I had my personal doubts about this because it seemed pretty sudden but over the last year I have since come to believe that my brother and his fiance are in fact in love with each other, although with them having a long distance relationship I think they are in for some challenges once they are married and living together. On top of that they have been going through the process of getting her a visa/citizenship so they she can come to the states and they can get married here. Over the last year this has been the biggest topic of discussion with my family and we are a little divided on it. Some are in full support of the whole situation (saying they are so excited to meet her and can't wait for the wedding), others think he's being a bit crazy in committing to this without having taken time to actually date this woman. I fall in between these two, I fully support him in wanting to get married, I believe him when he says he is in love (if he wasn't I wouldn't see why he would go through this whole citizenship process) but I have my worries about his security and quality of life post marriage. He is a student, just recently got a job as a busser and currently lives with my mom and two sisters. I'm just worried about his situation once everything is cleared and him and his fiance are able to get married here.

On the other hand, I met my fiance almost three years ago and we have been together ever since. My family immediately fell in love with her and with good reason because she truly is the sweetest woman I have ever been with. I have been bringing her around my family a lot throughout our relationship and she has even spent time with them without me being there, so they have really had a chance to get to know her. We moved in together 6 months ago and withing a month of the move I proposed to her. Prior to me proposing though I was constantly getting asked, borderline harassed about if or when I would be proposing to her, constantly telling me how much they loved her and how amazing she was or that I'd "never find a girl like her again" etc. So I propose, she says yes, and we start the process of planning our wedding.

Here is where I start to wonder AITA; I am not having a traditional Mormon wedding, I am having just your standard wedding i.e. ceremony, reception (with dj, dancing, bar, cake etc.). Basically the whole nine yards. My brother is having a traditional Mormon wedding i.e. getting married in the temple (which only a handful of people can actually attend, myself not included), followed by a reception at the church which is most commonly just a stop by, say congrats, maybe eat some food, and then leave. so there is much more involved in my wedding than his, but that's not to say that his is any less exciting. My biggest issue is that because if the immigration process my brother and his fiance do not have a wedding day set since they have no real idea of when she will be able to move here and get married. I on the other hand will be getting married in 4 months, but yet every time my fiance drive to spend time with my family the conversation at some point in the night turns to my brother and his engagement and the immigration battle he is fighting and all of that, and nothing is ever said about my engagement or PLANNED AND UPCOMING wedding. I honestly had really realized this until about 2 months ago when my fiance said something about along the lines of "why doesn't your family say anything about our engagement? And why do they bring up your brother so much?"

I realize his struggles outweigh mine in a sense, but since then I can't stop thinking about it and notice it more and more. I literally had my fiance right next to me at Christmas as we said goodbye to my grandfather and he said "bye it was good seeing you two! Have you heard anything from your brother yet about his wedding?" (he was in Mexico at the time visiting her). I responded '"No I haven't heard from him, but you got my wedding invitation in the mail right?!"

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AITA?

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\*Sorry for spelling and grammar errors