This is regarding an incident a while back that I'm still mulling over. Long post, so sorry.

**Content warning:** there's a some backstory here involving a history of abuse. It factors into my own motivations and actions, but can be skipped since it's only contextual to the incident in question.

**The Context**

My sister was verbally and emotionally abusive to me and my brother up to around two years ago, for around 10 years total. I won't go into all the details, but suffice to say although she nominally meant well at times she effectively made my high school years and part of college hell, our dad did nothing or backed her up, and my friends were the only reason I made it through. (Sidenote: I'm seeing a therapist, don't worry.)

She was aware I complained about her to them online and in person, one time taking my computer and reading my chat messages about her. *Most relevantly,* twice she told me to listen to her or get out of the house. The second time I chose to get out and she and my brother had to go get me when they figured out I actually left. (I hadn't gone far, I also happened to have a broken foot at the time for unrelated reasons.)

A few years back various factors converged, and my sister apologized for what she'd done. We had a decent relationship for about a year and a half.

**The Incident**

My brother and I visited our sister where she lives in Chicago right before Christmas, staying at her apartment over a few days/nights. At dinner one night we got into an argument (something petty about pronunciation that escalated) and she essentially accused me of ignoring evidence because I didn't want to admit she was right and I was wrong, and if I was going to be like that she wasn't sure she wanted me to be under the same roof as her. Effectively, she was threatening to throw me out.

Given our history I immediately recognized the situation as familiar and soon pulled out my phone to vent-text my friend about it - my brother clearly didn't want to get involved (which I don't blame him for), and I was internally screaming at what I perceived as the injustice of the situation and the repeat of history.

I was sitting next to my sister so naturally she saw, and when she asked if I was complaining about her to a friend I gave a flat and unconvincing "No" (not wanting to escalate, but also not in the state of mind to lie convincingly). I continued texting my friend until she asked me to put my phone away, at which point I did.

She later apologized and said she doesn't like it when people complain about her where she could see because it was rude, and she wouldn't complain about her boyfriend if he were there for example.

**TL;DR:** AITA about complaining about my sister in front her? In terms of abusive behavior she's definitely the one at fault, but for the specific texting incident I don't know whether I was justified or not.