18.5% of my paycheck goes to child support. This isn’t court ordered this is a personal agreement between the mother and I. To be noted when I asked an amount she had told me about 25% less than that and I instead give more. Her new hubby had gotten orders to Japan but needed my signature for my daughter to get a passport to come with. I am also in japan and we had discussed me having her for 3 months out of the year instead of the usual one month I get when I come home on leave. Child care where I’m at is about 26% of my paycheck. The mother refused to budge on any of the child support at all even though my daughter would be with my for three months now instead of not much at all plus me having to spend so much solely on daycare not even including actually providing for her. I refused to sign the passport paper because of her not being willing to compromise. In turn that made them not able to come to japan. This was all two weeks ago. Now they are going to Virginia instead which I haven’t been told by her mother. I only know because she posted it on FB and my Grandmother saw it and told me. And biggest issue of all is that my daughter has a hole in her heart and they just found out. Again. She hasn’t said a word to me, I only know because of my grandma. Am I the asshole in this situation? 