 

TD:DR  
read girlfriend's friends dm, about some issue we had, she said that this is 'just like her ex' and from everything she told her, its stockholm syndrome and she needs to end this relationship

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(16 M btw)

(something to note is we both have each others accounts)

Also I'll call the friend T, and my gf G.

So it was a Saturday night, and I was talking to my girlfriend over discord, and I made a joke when she asked a question, about how there was a bird over there, and how she should look over there to find it. She says 'Where?!', obviously playing along with the joke, so I thought I'd message my mate, and tell him to tell her there's a bird just under there. (ya know, the old 'underwear?' joke) and he does. I tell him to delete all those messages so she can't see them (she has my discord account) and she sees the messages, screenshots them when I say delete them, and she sends them.

I, as a man of pure talent, claimed she photoshopped the picture, and she shows that she is annoyed with that response. (I guess that she was actually serious, I thought she was still playing along) she says she wont respond until I admit the dms were real. At this point, I have to go and pick my sister up from the airport. I dont respond, bc i didnt know what to say tbh.

A side note here. I thought T was my friend too, so I told her my side of the story starting here.

So I am with mum to airport, pick sister up, takes about 30 minutes all together. and she still hasnt messaged. I send a message, saying 'hey babe? you okay?' because I'm a little worried now. I go back to celebrate sister coming home, still worried about the whole thing. she ignores me for about another 30 minutes, then I send another few messages, because I'm starting to get more worried about her. have I done something that I'm unaware of? idk.. so I log into her discord.. and whenever I send a message, whether it be are u okay or anything, she closes the dm (that means that she can no longer see me in her list of dms). I obviously get a bit worried, and I feel something in the pit of my stomach. she keeps closing the dms when messaging her, and I begin to shake, not a 'cold' shake but I guess a fear shake? this is the first time I really shook like this, plus I was close to really freaking out about it.

I sorta slow down messaging her, since that could be the issue. Wait another 30 minutes, my fear and saddness has kinda turned into anger. The sorta 'why the fuck wont she tell me what I did' sorta shit. I sent a few angry messages, starting with 'I'm actually kinda fucking pissed now'. bc I was. Seemed stupid that I had sent messages only for her to read them, and close them. So, remember, since I have her account, I go on and see if she's talking about me. She is. she is saying to quote 'he's fucking pissed now'. (this is to the friend who thinks that it's stockholm syndrome spoiler alert)

I'm not sure why, and this is the thing I'm questioning, so I ask G 'if u wanna break up tell me, bc I'd rather u tell me then I just play this guessing game'. She responds to T by telling her 'please tell him I dont wanna break up' (T didnt tell me until about 30 minutes later) G says she hates it when I'm angry, and T begins to describe how she's in the right and i'm in the wrong because I 'didn't let u speak your mind' and it's clear that 'he does it alot so' She also mentions how her ex use to do the same. Made no sense since she chose not to say anything, and I wanted her to talk.

She goes on to say that from what G has told T, it looks like Stockholm syndrome, just like her ex. (I asked G about this, and she didnt know what to say bc she didn't really understand how it does actually mean that). there might be more to this but I didnt ask. T goes on to say that I'm nice, but I just have a very destructive personality. (something to mention is T said this to me as well, but she said T had one as well) T also said that 'you guys arent going to break up around this time, when T was heavily implying that G should dump me. but anyways, G starts talking to me, she sends a long message about what I did.

" 1. You subtly called me a liar because i photoshopped something which made me think you don't trust me 2. you told me that i shouldn't have looked at yours and 'my friend' dm's which in reality, i told you quite specifically not to look at T and my dm's but you did so i doubt it was even an issue. especially since i wasn't even doing anything, i just needed proof you two were talking about the whole bird thing 3. you pretended not to know what i was talking about which really fucking hurt and then jsut now, got so fucking angry at my that it quite literally made me even more upset. you said sorry. i knew it was a joke and i was fine with that. what hurt me so much was that you practically called me a liar and then lied about sending 'my friend' that message. you apologised once and i barely picked up on it tbh. you then told me to "fucking block you already" and started talking about a break up (MAJOR HEARTBREAK BTW) and while i knew you wouldn't have done it, hurt that you thought i was going to do it. i wanted some space earlier and i was fine after that, but then you started sending more messages and it made me even more fucking worse but that's fine, i guess "

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T said around this time that 'u guys are happy sometimes but most of the time ur just upset, and that's not healthy'

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I didnt know what to say to that. I left it for a bit, and G sent a very narky 'I'm sorry then' and I responded 'idk if u are tbh' G got really pissed at me for that. and T said that I am just 'super self destructive' I kept talking to gf, and eventually got to a even standground, I confess that I read her and T's dms and she was okay with it

I went through it all with her, and for most of it she defended me, which was really cute.

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I love her so fucking much like omg.

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So that's it, if I am confusing, tell me, I'll try clarify, but let me know what u guys all think about it all?

Thanks a ton, and if u have advice, ik ur not meant to tell me, so just dm me with it. Thanks :)