Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : So, a little history is required. I met my ex-wife when I was 19, she was a little older than me and had a three month old. The father had done one when he found out she was pregnant, or so I was told but looking back on everything since I'm not overly sure what's a lie and what isn't. We were together for five years in all and married for one and a half. During this time I raised the little girl as my own and I'm the only father figure she knew and was aware of because she has only recently turned 6 and hadn't met her real dad until the last year.

About a year and a half ago we went through a divorce. We lost a child together through miscarriage and it went downhill from there. She began to not really talk to me about things and seemed to be texting an awful lot. I tried to talk things through because even before the pregnancy we weren't really doing stuff together together. She'd go out with friends and I'd stop in with my step daughter. Then comes the bombshell that she no longer loves me enough and she loves someone else. 10 points to Hufflepuff if you guessed she'd been texting and was getting back with her ex, the one who dumped her pregnant and is my step daughter's biological Dad. I was left with 14K worth of shared debt in my name and having to move back in with my parents, sleeping on the sofa for a year because they didn't have a spare room and I had nowhere to go. 

This brings me to recently. For the last year and a half I have still been seeing my step daughter every fortnight. Maybe an odd choice on my part but I had spent my early twenties raising this girl as my daughter. My ex has been fairly good about that but it's getting obvious I'm making things complex for her new situation and although she won't tell me I can't see my step daughter for fear of looking the bad guy I can tell she wants me to say it. She's lied to her family about our breakup and what she was up to (I found nudes sent and messages about meeting up in a hotel and she did go on a bizarre work trip out of the blue) and whatever she said has made them hate my guts despite the fact I supported a little girl who isn't mine and my ex-wife for five years (with her not working for two of those five).

The frustrating thing is, my stepdaughter's real dad is moving them both to Wales in the new year and we live in the Midlands currently. I'm still in a buttload of debt and visiting my stepdaughter regular would be problematic and they know that. It all came to a head last Sunday as an altercation took place between me and my ex's grandad as I was trying to drop my step daughter back home (until they move to Wales they're living at their grandparents). Basically he's demanding I pay back £1000 he gave me towards my car two and a half years ago which was never a loan. He said it was to help us out because at the time we were in financial trouble without a car and I needed to keep my job which involved a commute. He basically said you do enough for your wife and my stepdaughter and that was that. I said I wasn't comfortable with him giving me money and he just said not to worry. They now claim I said I'd pay it back. I said it was never a question of it being a loan until I got dumped and my ex left me in 14K of debt so am I getting 7K back? Apparently I'm a waste of space, he's taking me to court and went for me as he tried to throw me off his property. All whilst I was trying to say goodbye to my stepdaughter. My ex's grandad has never really liked me, he's bigoted and very opinionated and I was so thankful for their help at the time regardless of the circumstances. But now they keep using my step daughter and access to seeing her as a bargaining chip in their demands. When I said I wouldn't be paying it back as it was never a loan and I'd been left in a mountain of debt he told me never to show my face around the house again and that I was going to be stopped from seeing my stepdaughter as soon as she goes to Wales in February, he let that slip because he was angry and I could see my ex's face drop like he'd let it slip prematurely. She didn't say a word other than to tell me to leave when he started to get aggressive.

I'm honestly not sure what to do. Whether to take this arguement as it and just decide now to walk away, stopping all contact immediately, or keep making the effort until they take my stepdaughter away in Feb. She's miserable because they bitch about me in front of her and start to argue with me in front of her. As much as I love her and I'm sure she'd miss me at first I think she'd be happier out of this toxic nonsense and as difficult as it is to type I think I would too. They've spoilt having her for me because there is always something else and now apparently legal battles and they seem to keep reminding me that she's not mine which is getting more obvious and difficult everytime I see her. Any advice would be appreciated, it's been a tough couple years that just seems to not be ending. The time of year is a big factor, for my own mental and physical health walking away seems the best thing to do but there's a six year old that never asked for any of this looking forward to the holidays and is doing it now cruel? Especially because taking this threat of never showing up again as gospel means I basically just vanish? Is vanishing better than speaking to her? How do you tell a six year old you won't see her again and her not get upset and think it's her fault, especially three weeks before Christmas? 

Despite the fact I was told to never show my face again and that they'd see me in court, my ex text me to say "sorry bout that, not stopping you seeing xxxxxx" as if to put the ball in my court and absolve herself from any guilt. I didn't reply and that was about five days ago. If you haven't guessed by this point she's quite manipulative and often finds someway of turning arguments around on me. I have to admit I'm not as eloquent as she is and it's frustrating because she's never proven wrong. I ring my stepdaughter on Sunday evenings by ringing her mum and her passing the phone over, would stopping contact now be the cowards way out? I'm considering blocking their numbers and just moving on. We don't live in the same town anymore but we still work in the same small town, I commute. 

TL; DR Wife left me for my stepdaughter's biological Dad who dumped her pregnant and hadn't seen his daughter in five years. Her family want to take me to court for money I don't owe them and my ex and stepdaughter are planning to move to Wales, not sure whether to walk away now and break all contact and stop being so damn nice (or a push over).