M(24)Don't like talking about this, so I guess this is the reason for a throwaway.

It's been more than 6 years since then, but this still bothers me a lot. We were a prefect family, me and my sister both top of our classes, I went to elite high school and was doing great, never in my life any problems etc. Then I got into gaming and became really good. So good in fact, that before I even turned 18 I managed to earn twice the minimum monthly wage of my country by playing, once I earned minimum wage in less than 3 days of playing. To maintain my form I had to play a lot and stay focused, which resulted into my high school performance becoming more average. I was still very social, but really spent most of my free time behind the computer. Needless to say this irritated my parents a lot. Combine that with father's distaste for computers(even today he still has no smartphone) and relations became tense. While I had to stay focused and calm, parents came to my room and insulted me, disturbed, sometimes even cut off power.. But as I was being paid for winning every such action actually resulted into me having to play more. Was even at school counselor who asked my family to give me a break, after all I was outspoken and underage kid with such income is rare.

But situation at home deteriorated. We fought, while I still loved my father it meant that his actions hurt me that much more. Now the moment that makes me wonder if I'm an asshole.. In one specifically heated argument later in the evening, which of course started while I was still playing power was cut off and I was told few defamatory things, combined with the knowledge I'd have to make up for this intrusion the next day, and the fact I was told that I should stare in the ceiling instead of this pointless sh-t this enraged me. I am super calm person, but that day I exploded. I demanded a break and an apology and threatened to stop doing all my school work, something parents were very proud of, felt like there's nothing else I could do. I swear that when I was ignored, I felt something shift in my brain and since then I am very apathetic. I finished high school without ever studying and skipping most of classes(was actually ill and had some surgery, which also made me quit "pro' gaming), but with exception of final country wide exam, most grades were bad. Sadly this attitude didn't help me with university so for a while now, so I'm just changing them every year, as I am not allowed to exams for my low attendance. Sometimes I regret it when exams are near, but never in time to actually do something about it. My parents actually supported me for the most of the time there.

And after all this time, I still blame my father for that. We don't talk much, but every few months when we argue about my performance I don't even say sorry for being a terrible son these last few years, I just demand an apology for his "ruthless" behavior. Still didn't get one.

AITA?