So my father lives across the US, and I have to visit every summer because of divorce policies or whatever the specifics are. I'm supposed to visit for ~3 weeks, because that gives time to visit him, do activites, and see extended family. Last year was my first summer visiting, and my brother came out with me, however it got all messed up.

Two days before my flight, my grandfather called my mother and let us know my dad was in jail for heroin usage after he was found passed out in the bathroom. And a lot of it; they even charged him with intent to distribute. What this meant is I spent three weeks with my brother in the state, and jumped around to different relatives because we had no stable transportation without complications.

The three weeks weren't too good; we did go to a pretty boardwalk, and stayed in an RV. We were with my grandfather, and my grandmother who isn't blood related, and she has an autistic son (~30ish M). This wouldn't have been an issue, however she never properly taught him manners, how to do self-care (showering), or anything of the sorts. For the manners problem: I wore skirts and shorts because it was summertime, and hot as hell. (I'm underage, if that helps clarify why I'm upset over this.) He peeked up my skirt as I was getting out of the car, and stared at me as I slept, and as I was getting ready for the day. He constantly stood close to me, and when I told my grandparents I was uncomfortable, they just laughed it off as 'me being rude.'

After a week and a half of hiding in the bathroom and eating far away from her son, we finally got the chance to stay in my dad's house with his girlfriend. However, she was drinking from 10 AM to 10 PM before crashing out, and getting upset if we didn't express joy about my dad. We also got tossed to two other family members during this time. There was arguments with my whole family, and I did not have a good time at all until the end. He got out of jail in time for us to see him for about two days, and we had a barbeque and everything. That was the only fully enjoyable time I had out there.

Which brings me to the point of this post. I was out there for three weeks, and didn't enjoy it. I only want to go for two weeks this summer, given the fact last year was straight up shit and my brother won't be flying out w me this year to make things tolerable. My father is saying 'either stay out here for the whole three weeks and enjoy it, or don't see me at all.' He has been in court ordered rehab programs and everything, but I don't want to even risk the fact he might relapse once he's off the hook with the courts. Every day he talks about how I'm ungrateful, his life is shit, and he wishes he had died. I also have things here at home I need to do that can't be pushed back. AITA for not wanting to go for three weeks in fear of being dumped on distant relatives again?