Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : I get the feeling this might go badly for me but anyways...


My grandmother died (last remaining grandparent also) and my mom is devastated. My mom and I live out of the country and would have to fly for the funeral in order to attend. I hate funerals, hate flying (I don't really take holidays unless I can drive, but with my work I don't really take holidays at all). 


My brother and dad are alive and well, both able to go but have said no. My dad lives in the country with me, but my brother actually lives in the country the funeral is being held in. It's important to note that throughout the year I do a LOT for my mom and she generally still has a lot of complaints. My brother and dad aren't great with her, they don't help her or do much for her or with her. She has an idyllic dream of a movie style family, and our family dynamics are much more strained than that. She often vents about it, and because I'm the only one that will listen I always get the brunt of it. When she complains to me I try and tell her "I hate when you keep complaining about it, it's not fair to complain about 'your family not caring about you' to me... when I'm the one that's literally here listening and doing things for you and with you." I go for dinner etc, help her move furniture, all sorts but it's never good enough and she lets me know. She'll thank me usually in the moment, but then complain later on about something else. It's just frustrating that I end up having to do the work of what should be multiple people, I go over to her house and let her rant about work and support her but I feel like I'm having to be a husband, sons, and daughter to her (she often complains she wished she'd had girls as they would care about her more than I do). 


I don't want to say she's full on narcissistic as she isn't. But I guess I just get fed up of the back and forth always happening, so when it comes to doing something for her I really don't want to do (fly/go to a funeral) I just don't want to do it. 


AITA?  