Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : Recently found out that my husband has been cheating on me and more and that essentially our whole marriage was a lie.  He was diagnosed with some mental health issues and is remorseful.  However he is barely capable of functioning without his various addictions to numb him.  He liked the attention and validation he got from others.  I am doing the lions share of all the work, like I always did before, and am trying to be patient as meds, therapy and hard work start to take effect.  

We decided to take a night away from kids, etc and get a hotel.  It’s been a rough two weeks with things really devolving on his part- he’s been struggling.  I have been here for him, although it is all taking its toll on me too and there have been a few times I have snapped.

So, first issue is that as part of the reconnecting, our marriage therapist suggested he write me a note each week. No note this week.  This morning was the deadline.  I was disappointed and sad.  

I tried to fuck him this morning and we played around a little and then he stopped and said I needed to wait, that he was just teasing me.  Okay.  I was disappointed as I am the High libido partner but whatever, maybe this would be fun.  

We packed up and headed out.  We stopped at a store to grab some clothes for me, because it’s been a LONG time and I had nothing to wear out.  

I was pointing something out to him in the store when we walked in and was in the middle of speaking when a cute salesgirl, totally his type, says “What are you shopping for today?”  Both or them completely interrupting and ignoring me, he smiles at her and says “Oh you know, I need a dress!” and they both start cracking up.

Then we pull into our hotel a bit later and I point out a cute gazebo and am talking about how excited I am and how romantic it is and he interrupts me and says “This place seems like the kind of place where strangers meet to fuck for an hour then leave.”  (It isn’t that kind of place at all.)

Now things are tense because my feelings are hurt.  He’s mad because “apparently he can’t do anything right.” But he has LITERALLY forgotten every practical thing this week (calling his DR about med issues for instance) and also the couple building stuff.  But he didn’t forget anything HE wanted.  

I am not asking for much.  His comments and attitude hurt after a shit week.  

Who is the asshole?