Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : Background: My husband and I have three kids together: one from his previous  marriage (17) and two from our marriage (14, 16). We obviously love them all equally, and treat them all the same. The two kids from our marriage are in out of school sports, with one getting private swimming lessons and the other being involved in drums corps, which is basically professional marching band which you pay to participate in. The one from our previous marriage had  not involved in any extracurricular activities outside of school so far.



That said, my husband works at a gym that teaches all sorts of martial arts, so you can imagine how excited he was when our oldest said he wanted to start practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu! The same day our kid told us, he got it cleared with his boss and told us at dinner that his boss was perfectly okay with him training at their gym for free. 




We thought he would be excited, but he was seemingly disappointed. He said he did not want to train at the same gym at my husband, because it would be weird to get lessons from him. (My husband teaches Brazilian Jiu Jitsu every other day) I think my husband was hurt by this, but told him it would be fine if he went only on the days he was teaching the cardio classes so that they wouldn't  train together, but our son wasn't having it. He said it's not fair that the other kids were getting their activities paid for, and that we couldn't pay for his. I sort of see where he's coming from, I'm sure at his age it seems unfair, but my husband was not having it. He told him he should be grateful for the free lessons, and that he would be learning the same things at a gym we pay for anyways. They had an argument, and now our son is accusing us of playing favorites, as we pay for the other kids' stuff.




I'm honestly torn about the situation. Like I said, I'm sure as a teenager it may seem like getting the hand me down clothes while everyone else gets brand new stuff. At the same time, my husband insists that it would be wasteful to pay for something that is being offered for free, and I see that point. The lessons he would be getting at another gym cost around $120 a month in a class setting, and $200 plus a month for the hour and a half long private and semi private lessons he would be getting for free at my husband's gym. To play devil's advocate though, I think my husband was very hurt at our son not wanting to train with him after he got so excited about it all, and at this point is just trying to win the argument. 



So Reddit, what do you think? Is it fair to stand our ground and tell him to attend my husband's gym, or is it fair to pay for lessons elsewhere? I honestly want to be fair to everyone, and make sure nobody gets their feelings hurt!