I apologize if this is a boring post. I haven't exactly 'lost' friendships or gotten into arguements with people over this issue but it feels like I'm forcing them (and myself) into an awkward situation.

There is a old guy at work that's really nice. We have been chatting a bit and it feels nice to have him as a friend. But then we ran into each other at breakroom. He offered to pay for my meal. It costed a whopping dollar. I refused. He insisted. I insisted harder. He wasn't offended but I think he was upset I didn't take the gesture.

I used to go to a coffee shop after work, and after getting my third coffee there free, I stopped going. It's been months. I can't even get six feet close to that place without feeling panic.

I feel like this behavior is limiting me from bonding with people. I have no issue paying for someone else's meal. But I can't stand to have my own meal paid for.

It's not even like I'm rich or anything. But my mother has told me I might be coming off as stuck up. My brother says I need to chill.

I don't know what to really think.

If it helps, I'm a 28 female.