Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : I’ve moved into a home for the first time that is truly nice, after getting married. It has been my dream to entertain at home for a long time, we take it seriously and it is a real joy to share what we have and have a nice time with people we love.

One of my closest friends and his wife (I’ve been close with them both for over a decade, him for much longer) came to visit. They also love to entertain. They’ve had us over for dinner and to stay in their home countless times. They know what it means to host. Actually, I learned a lot of what I know about hosting from them.

When I said “let us cook you dinner” on the phone while setting it up earlier that day, my friend said “no, let us just bring Thai.” My wife has a sensitive stomach and eating prepared food doesn’t always agree with her, so cooking at home is always the preference. I replied that we have a lot of food that fits their dietary restrictions, it would be our pleasure to make them a meal and have a nice night in our home. He said his wife would not eat anything  we prepared, that it’s a weird thing with her, we just need to order Thai.

A good host respects their guests needs. So at first I agreed. I didn’t know this quirk, but ok. Thai, then.

But then I started thinking about all the dinner parties in houses these people have told me about. They eat at other people’s houses almost weekly. 

They arrived, we provided appetizers with drinks, she ate them. We ordered Thai. Waited an hour and were starving. There was a mistake with Grubhub, and we would not be delivered the food. My wife threw together a quick and simple meal, which my friend ate and loved. His wife, literally stumbling drunk at this point from drinking cocktails with no food since lunch (which she ate out—she does restaurants, and other peoples’ houses), refused to eat, and became hangry and snappy at her husband, who was hurt and embarrassed. They left.

And I’m left feeling really offended. We’re clean people. We have food for every diet. We wanted to share our one of our simplest pleasures with people who know exactly how nice it is to host your friends. What am I missing here? Am I the asshole for feeling like maybe these people aren’t really friends at all, or at least not the kind of friends you invite to your home? Help me let go of this grudge, or of them.