Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : My extended family is small.

I was close to uncle Dave and aunt Marie when I was a kid and they were "cool aunt and uncle". They have two boys, Mike and Tony. Mike is few years younger than me and Tony just turned 18. His birthday party is this Saturday and also a reason why I'm writing here.

As years went on my mental health deteriorated but I don't know how much they know since no one ever bothered to ask me anything. What I do know is they treat me as... As if I'm stupid. Like I don't understand concepts of politics, relationships and "adulting" altogether. 

My dad and Dave were raised by narcissistic grandpa Tom that died in late October of 2018. Their mom died back in 2001. Grandpa Tom was abusive asshole. He had a sister that was always treat as "damaged goods" by their parents and grandpa was sunniest sun there is. They enabled shithead to achieve his full shitty potential, but I digress.

My parents never treated me and my brother any different. Even if they did it wasn't because of our genders. What I do feel when I'm around my extended family is that same dismissive attitude people have when they view someone as "less worthy". 

For example, if I were to come to Tonys birthday party it would be expected from me to help with serving people, doing the dishes, etc. I wouldn't be asked and I would end up being the rude one if I didn't help.

When they ask me something I often get corrected about *my opinions* as if whatever opinion I have is wrong. Sorry that I don't hate LGBTQ+ community, my bad. Sorry that my own divorce isn't good enough proof that I know what steps needs to be taken in order to get divorced.

Mike and Tony picked up same behaviour and I don't feel like part of family at all. Just annoyance that comes with my parents.

In early December I had my birthday. Birthdays are important to me.

What ended up being dot on the "i" was when uncle Dave called 17 days later to wish me happy birthday with some bullshit excuse. Few days prior he sent me pics of grandpa's dog that he adopted so it's not like we weren't in contact. You may ask "who does that"? Well, someone who will remember my brothers birthday is coming up (late December) and that they skipped mine. Upsie.

I'm just done. They have a lot on their plate but so do my parents who ask about Mike and Tony, then remember what they were told and follow up with situations. Not because they have to but because they are honestly interested in their well being.

I will not attend Tonys party, I haven't sent him a birthday wish.


My parents and my brother know who I truly am and they know I have more to bring to the table then just "help in the kitchen" and be quite around other guests.

So AITA for cutting them off after no one reached out on my birthday?