Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : A little background: I'm 33, my kids mother is 35, my son is 3 and he'll be 4 in July.  We barely even knew each other when she got pregnant.  She was a hook up.  It was irresponsible and I regret it but I love my son.  

I've been pretty distant off and on since his birth because we can't manage to get along.  Lately I've made a huge attempt to get my life straight and the result is I get to stay at her apartment on my days off just to spend time with him.  I do work around her house and we watch movies together.  Things are actually going really well.  

For the last three months I've been keeping my mouth shut so as to not start fights.  Last year she decided to punish me by skipping every holiday.  Around Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, she refused to pick up her phone.  Starting in January I pretended it didn't happen and we "started over".  

So here's the problem: all he ever wants to do is watch YouTube.  And she let's him.  It is literally his babysitter.  I waited a long time to do anything about it but it has just gotten worse.  I wanted to avoid the argument.  I want to see him on his birthday.  But I have finally had enough.  He woke up from a nap the other day and immediately picked up her phone.  I said it was enough and took it away.  Que the screaming tantrum.  She said "just give it to him I have a headache and I have homework".  I put my foot down and said he needs social interaction and exercise.  She comes back with "he gets both of those at school. He is student of the month, has the highest grades in his class, and if he wants YouTube he can have it, besides, I limit him to 3 hours a day".  I was at a loss for words.  Three.  Fucking.  Hours.  Around this time her father walks in and wants to know why my son is freaking out and we're arguing.  I explained that I took the phone away and why and he actually agreed with me.  He even admitted that he was guilty of it, too.  I stole a glance at his mother and she was giving me the shittiest death glare I've ever seen.  Now she's punishing her father by limiting his time with my son and she's been speaking to him like he's retarded.  He and I both know why.  So now my son gets out of school at 3pm.  Watches YouTube for an hour or two, takes a nap, does it again, then goes to bed.  Once in a while he'll play with toys or ask to go to the playground.  I have started taking the phone away.  Every single time he kicks and screams and throws himself on the ground.  He's even said "daddy isn't my friend anymore" which I laughed about and said I love you anyway but honestly it fucking hurt.  

So now I'm back in the doghouse, the father is suffering for it, and my son doesn't even like spending time with me.  

Should I just let him enjoy his cartoons?  Am I going overboard with parenting when I haven't really been in the picture?  Am I the asshole?