Hey everybody, I’m back. 

Link to my original post. TLDR for the last post; I (44M) live with my girlfriend (32F) and my two boys, 8 and 14. My girlfriend recently lost her job and I have been supporting her since. I asked her to pick up the boys from school a couple of days a week and watch them - she called me an asshole.

A lot of the comments on my last post mentioned how my kids would pick up on this kind of behavior and that they could sense her not wanting to actually be there for them. I hadn’t considered this before and it was definitely a wake up call for me. So I sat down last night with my oldest and asked him what he thought of everything. His mother being away, living with me full time and what he thought of my girlfriend. I should have had this conversation a long time ago, but as all parents know time just seems to fly by and nothing gets done. My son had some valid thoughts and overall was very happy with how things were going so I was relieved to know I hadn’t unknowingly been hurting my children. 

And then my girlfriend realizes that I’ve had this conversation, and goes through the roof. She thinks I’ve undermined her by talking to him about her, and says I have absolutely no confidence in her whatsoever. She left the house at 10:30 to stay with a friend and basically said she needs to rethink the entire relationship. That I have betrayed her and that I have the maturity level of a 6-year-old.

I understand some of her points, but we are adults. I have two children that I obviously need to be able to talk to without clearing it with my girlfriend first. I did not go to my son to undermine my girlfriend and our conversation was just as much about his mother’s trip as it was about her. 

I feel like I’m back in high school with this drama, and there is no way I’m venting to my friends so here I am Reddit - asking once again, Am I the asshole? 