I am a clean person and take special note to keep my private bits fresh. I am also very sensitive and use unscented laundry soap. That said, with any sexual partner I have had I make sure to remind them that they need to be sanitary before any kind of contact. This means recently showered, hands washed, and if they want to go down on me they need to use mouthwash first (my gyno said that mouth germs can cause things to get funky). 

I made my current fwb aware these things being important to me when we engage. As much as I love the heat of the moment, several times I have had to stop him before things got more heated to tell him to go wash his hands. It is kind of annoying and makes me wonder if his past partners did not care as much about their well-being. He has told me before that he washed them *recently*. But I would see him touching his phone, game controller, or whatever germ harboring thing. I explain to him that he needs to wash them right before. The next few times I remind him until I trust he will respect my wishes. 

Well, a few days ago things got hot between us. It was very much in the moment, so when he was reaching his hands down my pants I did not say anything and enjoyed. He continued with his mouth, which I blindly assumed was clean. We finish up and all is fine. Within the next few times I go to the bathroom I notice that things start to smell fishy down there. I had not seen him go right before we did that, but was not paying attention either. I have never had issue with these kinds of things without impulsive sexual decisions (not STD’s, more like doing things while camping or in other less sanitary situations where immediate hand-washing and that sort of thing did not happen). A friend once told me that vagina’s clean themselves when I told her how much of a stickler I am in bed. I know this is true, but only to a certain extent. 

So now I am left super irritated that he did not mind my wishes and I have to feel like an AH every time I need to remind him to wash up. 