For the last 9 years DH and I buy and prepare all the food for Thanksgiving and xmas (usually costs about $250 per meal). We also try to buy all of the family members that come over a gift and also have the kids make gifts, from them, to everyone. A few years ago DH and I were saving money to buy a house so we told everyone that the meal would have to be the gift for the adults. I still worked with the kids to make a gift for everyone (we made photo collages of the kids that were framed). We gave the "kid gift" to MIL and her husband as a joint present. We had also gotten MIL a bath thing that cost $5. MIL got really bent out of shape and shamed DH and I for "not getting her husband a gift". Are we the asshole for not getting him a separate him only gift?