Some backstory (and I'm as I'm sort of emotional over some of the things that were said to me, I am trying my very best to be even handed but may not be successful):

I married my wife 5 years ago and went to work using my MBA. I quickly got sick of feeling like I was just trading emails around so I quit. My brother in law offered me temporary job in his business. I don't want to be specific but it's a skilled trade type job where we make medical appliances for individuals. I quickly found the work fascinating and since we work in things like gold, silver, plasters and acrylics, it's a very "artisan" oriented job and I actually really enjoy my finished products. Plus there's some satisfaction that I am helping people live more comfortable lives. 

But my brother-in-law hazed the fuck out of me for the lack of a better term. He was just shitty to me. My sister says he's always been like this but unlike my MBA job I could clock out at 5 and be done with it, plus I like other people I worked with. 

So three things happened in the last year. One is that I found out my Brother in Law was paying me about 3/5 of what he was paying everyone else who does my job and I was making even less than a brand new hire who had just come on. At that point I started looking for other work.  2nd thing that happened was I overheard a dinner conversation between BIL and another brother in law in that the one I worked for was wasting close to half a million dollars a year because he just wasn't getting stuff out on time, losing customers, being inefficient and his employees stealing precious metals from him. He also said he was helpless to do anything about it. Thirdly, I was doing a delivery and one of the doctors who installs our stuff asked me who did a certain piece. I told him that it was one of mine. He said the quality was heads and tails above anyone else and that he was so sick of my BIL's lateness and dismissive attitude that he would happily provide me with some financial backing to start my own business. 

So I went home that night and talked with my wife and she was in full favor of it. This was in late October so I quit my BIL, started doing as much as I could at home with the tools and equipment I had. We hired a lawyer who drew up incorporation documents and as of today I am 55%/45% owner with the doctor. We have 10 employees and I've been literally working myself to the bone but happily doing so. 

I figured there was plenty of business in the state but wanted to avoid stepping on my BILs toes but when other clients found out I was in business, the abandoned him en-masse. So much so that he has had to dramatically drop his prices in order to keep the ones who would stay. But I still get calls almost daily from his clients. At this point, I have to turn them away because I'm too busy but I am in the process of hiring more people (some of the worked for my BIL). 


I'm sorry I'm getting to the point. My Father in law had a birthday lunch today. We were invited by my mother in law but my wife and I didn't even make it through the door before pretty much all her brothers and sisters (7 of them) told us that we were complete assholes for what we've done and we are no longer welcome at family events. 


Am I the asshole?


tl;dr: I opened the same type of business as my brother in law after working for him for 3 years. He was complete shit to me both in attitude and pay and I found out he wasn't a great businessman. I was invited by one of his clients to start a business with him so I did. Now we are not welcome at family events .
