Welcome to the pettiest story you will read all day. 

So my boyfriend (22M) and I (22F) live together and have been dating for almost 3 years. I’m just having a hard time seeing his side in an argument and was hoping I could get some input if I’m actually the asshole here. 

So he ce home from class this afternoon while I was preparing slides for a class I teach in the evening. We say down together to catch up before I had to leave, and he started telling me an animated venting story. Part way through the story, he was getting really loud and animated, so I quietly made a “shh” sound to indicate that he should lower his volume (without disrupting the story). 

He lost his shit. Long story short, he got angry wth me for shushing him. He said that he hates when I do this and that me wanting him to be quieter in the middle of the day (instead of at night) is really me wanting him to change the core of his personality. 

For clarification, I love when he tells stories and gets animated! My issue is the volume. We live in a tiny studio apartment for one, and he’s a generally loud person. I have issues with loud sounds. When he talks loudly it makes it hard for me to engage in the conversation and it stresses me out (I’ve tried to explain this to him). I also had to leave almost immediately to go teach a class, another reason why I was stressed and wasn’t into him talking so loudly. 

At the core of it, I feel like it wasn’t worth him getting so pissed about!! Am I the asshole for wanting him to talk in a quieter voice? If you think I’m the asshole here please candidly explain, I’m so lost as to why this is a big deal. 