My husband hates his job. HATES it. There are no pros to this job. They don't pay well, the bosses are terrible managers (overbooking appointment when they only have so many workers to cover so many customers), he's on a wacky 6 day a week 12 hour night schedule so I don't see him and his friends don't see him. It has thrown him into a rut. 


I've told him to look for a new job, or just flat out quit and I will support him/keep us afloat until something else comes along. I told him to apply for things he's passionate about even if it means a page cut. Anything to get my husband back to his old self. 


He's asked me for help and says he doesn't even know where to start, doesn't have the time to do anything etc. so I've done the following (at his request for assistance):


* Updated his resume (I do this for my job so I know it's good quality)

* Drafted a cover letter

* Found a list of jobs he qualifies for and put them into an easy to read Word Doc

* Made him an Indeed account

* Started covering all the chores so that he can focus on applying for jobs when he is home (did this without him asking but made it clear "I am doing this so you can focus on applying for new jobs")


He has done nothing. He said he "tried to quit but they wouldn't let them." He hasn't turned in a single application, or even opened the document I've made with a list of jobs. And of course he isn't doing any chores at home. 


This has been going on for months. He's clearly depressed so I also suggested he talk to a therapist about all this, he says he doesn't have time because he's so burnt out. All he talks about anymore is how he hates his job, and feels like it's eating away at his social life, mental health and everything. 


At this point the CLEAR common denominator is just this job. If he quits he can see friends again and will have time to see a therapist if that is still an issue, but I highly suspect a change of scenery will greatly improve his mood. He is a good worker and I know if he turned in an application he'd get a response. But I can't force him to submit applications and he JUST WON'T DO IT.


He comes home every day and talks about how much he hates his job and wants to do something new, and I'm getting tired of it. I stay up late listening to him complain about his job, and I've done everything I can think of to help, but he won't meet me half way. 


Would I be the asshole if I flat out tell him I'm becoming unsympathetic to his complaints when he has done nothing to fix his situation? It'd be one thing if he was applying for jobs and still stuck in his current one, but he won't look, won't quit, won't go to therapy and he can't give me a reason why.