Is NOBODY wrong in the post ? POST : I'm going to try to make this short.  My wife and I have a friend.  She's really good friends with my wife. Just the other day she showed up at my wife's work.  She confided in her some news that she just found out that she has certain ailment that has no cure.  There are possible things to help minimize some of the symptoms. She told my wife that she's feels alone as her family livesin another state.  She's told her family back home but only my wife here. She's worried about her child and rightfully so if things take the turn for the worse.  She's  a single mom. 
I didn't know much about the ailment at the time.  I researched it last night and now I see she could be on either edge of the spectrum and I'm worried too.  
I don't want her to feel alone.  Wife told her we'll do whatever she needs and that their mutual friends would also. 
On one of the groups on reddit I read where a lady with same ailment had a friend that got shirts made that said "... is stupid".  This is where my predicament comes in.  I want to get said shirts made for all her friends here and back home and have a surprise gathering to show her she has a lot of support here.  Wife thinks her friend may feel like she broke her confidence.  I feel she needs to know now that she's not alone, that she has a lot of support here.   WIBTA if we did the shirts? 