Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : So, my brother has a long history of being an angry, abusive alcoholic. He has physically and verbally abused every girlfriend he has had (4 different women). He has been arrested and has done jail time for this, and was in jail for the last 3 months for his last attack (drunk and choking his girlfriend). He drunkenly punched my ex boyfriend 4 years ago which resulted in this boyfriend having to get surgery on his jaw and eat only soft foods for a month. It was incredibly hard for me to forgive him and be around him after this. He ended up doing jail time for this as well. On top of all of this, he's gotten into multiple drunken fights and drives drunk consistently. 

If he was not my brother, I would never ever want to be around him. He has 2 kids and to be honest, has always been a good dad to them (which is the one thing he has going for him), but I think he's just a horrible role model for them and has put them through a lot being in and out of jail and abusing their mothers. 

After all of this and being increasingly uncomfortable around him the past few years, I have decided I don't want to be around him anymore. I've made this clear to my parents. I've basically stopped asking about him since he's been in jail. I opened Facebook today and saw that he updated his profile picture and one of his friends tagged him in a photo. 

I already planned with my parents that my boyfriend and I would come stay with them for the weekend after Thanksgiving. I'm super excited about it since I haven't spent time with my family in a while (we live 3 hours away). I texted my dad and asked if he my brother had gotten out of jail. He said yes. I asked if he will be there next weekend and he said "I assume so." I told him if he is, we aren't coming and I'm sorry. He said he hopes I reconsider and my mom will be completely heartbroken. It upsets me that every time he does something like this it is completely swept under the rug and he is welcomed back with open arms. 

I'm upset because they didn't tell me he was going to be there (likely staying with my parents the whole weekend) but I also feel so awful because I don't want to make my mom sad and I was so looking forward to seeing my family. I don't know how to feel about it. Am I just being a baby? Should I just suck it up and go? I feel like I'm the only one in my family that feels so strongly about it. 

Am I the asshole for cutting ties with him and for not wanting to attend my family Thanksgiving because he will be there? 