Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : Happened yesterday, and this happens frequently, so I’d like to know how some opinions on it.

My mum picked me up from my Dad’s yesterday to save me getting the bus back. Somewhere along the line, I made an offhand comment and it talked into a talk about me being trans.

(For details, socially transitioned over two years ago and have my first adult GIC appointment really soon.)

It started with my mum saying that she didn’t want to go on hormones. Fair. I get that. I’m sick of hearing it, but it’s at least a legitimate concern. 

Then it went on to discussions of me as a child. My mum likes to cherry pick, and was talking about how normal I was as a kid. I’ve learnt there’s nothing you can say to contradict her or she will go off the rails.

Then, after ten minutes of being pissed off steadily, came the kicker.

‘I feel like that little girl is dead. I’m grieving for my child.’

I hate that. For more context, I was really ill and could easily have died a few years ago, so this really rankles me the wrong way. I asked her if she thought I was an imposter, then, and she listed off ways I am worse now.

I got fed up and snapped. I told her that if she wanted to complain about me, not to do it to me. I already listen to her problems a lot (always have done) but this stuff is just not okay to say to me. She got angry and said she was allowed to have feelings. 

We got saved eventually by McDonald’s. 

Am I the asshole? Should I be listening to my mum’s complaints about me? Or is my mum the asshole for saying stuff like that?