Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : For privacy, I am using a throwaway account and obscuring some identifying details.

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My father died a few years ago, in his fifties. He is survived by me (his only child), his ex-wife (my mother), his sister (my aunt), his estranged brother (my uncle), and his parents (my grandparents). This is the story of how my grandparents and I stopped speaking to each other after he died.

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My dad moved away from the deep south to the west coast to become an engineer. My grandparents still live in his childhood home. Grandpa is a retired railroad worker with a pension. (He used to tell me that he got that job when he was young by just showing up and refusing to leave.) Grandma is a homemaker.

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When my dad died, I flew out to take care of his body, his house, his work, and basically everything else, with my mom and step-siblings. My dad had always told me he wanted a Tibetan Sky Burial. But since that was illegal, cremation would do. He was into the "deathling" community and cheap, environmentally friendly treatment of corpses. 

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But when I called my grandparents, they told me they wanted me to fly his embalmed corpse to them so that they could bury him in the family plot. I told them that it would be extremely expensive (I had to pay for everything out of pocket), difficult to arrange logistically, and an especially bad idea for my dad's body, which was found about two days after he actually died. Besides, my dad hated the idea of embalming and burying corpses. They begrudgingly agreed, but insisted that I "bring him home". I knew my dad hated that area, but I thought I could give them some of the ashes, then spread the rest someplace he liked.

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Fast forward about a week. I'm at my grandparents' house. They have arranged a Nazarene burial and published an obituary soliciting donations to their church. (My dad was not Nazarene.) I am getting ready to divide the ashes for them, when they start berating me for having him cremated against their wishes and not letting them keep all the ashes. I won't recount everything they said, but they kept asking, "What about us?" and telling me, "We could die soon" and "The heartbreak you're causing will kill us." Eventually, I offered them all the ashes. They refused, saying I had taken him away from them. I just didn't know what to do at that point, so I drove off before sunrise and didn't contact them again. I still have the box of ashes because I just don't know what to do with them at this point. Am I the asshole here?