Hey all. First timer here; was enjoying the posts and figured I’d throw my own. 

I’m an adult woman living at home w/ family because of the mutual benefits (I help with bills and have a nicer standard of living for what I pay than if I lived alone). My fam is pretty close and we all work FT + I’m in school so all three of us are rarely home together.  However, recent issue has me wondering AITA?

Backstory: My mother has what I perceive to be several REALLY intrusive friends (I not so jokingly call her “the patron saint of lost causes” for this reason)—but one in particular really grinds my gears. First, she is LOUD as all get out. Second, she NEVER. STOPS. TALKING. Third, she is always here, so I never get a chance to miss her volume and loquacity. 

Anyway, we’ve all been off for Christmas and I’ve been looking forward to spending some QT with mom—grabbing breakfast, laying around watching movies, etc. I should also add that my mother is a homebody to the nth degree; I’ve never met someone more content to stay in the house ALL OF THE TIME. It just so happens that Annoying Friend moved to a new place this week. She came over after Christmas dinner and talked incessantly (I left and went to the movies, but not before my grandfather and my aunt pulled me aside to ask who this woman was and if she ever stopped talking). Everyday this week, my mother—the one who neverrrr goes anywhere—has been preoccupied with helping AF w/packing and moving. On Thursday, I asked mom to go to breakfast and she blew me off because she wanted to be around in case AF called for more help. I blew up—I know I did. I lost my cool and told her that I wasn’t asking for a lot, just a quick breakfast, and was there literally no one else in this entire universe who could befriend this woman and help her pack because I really wanted face time with my mother. She told me that AFs kids weren’t helping and she was alone and I was being ugly. I told her that she was trying to guilt me into caring for this person that I have expressed drives me up a wall and she said I was attempting to guilt her because this lady needs help and we needed to talk about this later. Told her I wasn’t interested in talking, grabbed my wallet, slammed the door behind me and went to breakfast solo. Since then, she’s been gone all day most days (presumably helping AF) and we’ve shared very few words. It’s tearing me up because I really do love my mom but I dislike feeling like I have to beg for her time. She knows AF’s annoying—when she’s here all day or talking constantly, she’ll often shake her head slightly or remark when she’s gone about how much she talks, but yet she’s always here because my Mom always offers. 

Lay it on me—AITA? And how do I apologize for the blowup without apologizing for the content? I meant what I said but not the emotional meltdown I said it with. 