Ok there's a lot to digress here, so bear with me.

My 2nd language is Japanese, I speak it at home and been to Japan multiple times. 

I've expressed to my boyfriend many, many times that I've wanted us to go to Japan together, because it is like my second culture and I would love for us to experience it together. While he didn't express too much interest in Japanese culture, he said he would also love for us to go to Japan together soon and would want to travel abroad for a new experience.

Last November, I went to Japan for a short vacation and for family reasons, also for my late brother's funeral. Initially my boyfriend was very excited and was planning to come with me, but we went through a hardship and he grew increasingly hesitant, then decided he would not be able to come with me. He also decided the funeral would be too much for him. I was heartbroken and this was a huge event in my life that I wish he could've accompanied me with. I tried to put myself in his shoes and realized that he would not want to go through such a thing but it still hurt because I wish he was with me at my side and wanted his support.

Fast forward months later, a few weeks ago he was telling me that he wanted to travel alone to another country, to better his mental health and to discover new things about himself. I was completely on board with it and encouraged him to do so. 

He then informs me yesterday that instead of traveling alone, he was going to go to Japan with his friend. His friend loves Japanese culture and is planning to go to Japan in May, and my boyfriend said he would tag along. He then asked if I would be mad at him for doing so. While I wasn't mad, I was incredibly hurt that this was so spontaneous and that I felt like he didn't consider that I would've wanted to go with him. 

He then said that he was surprised I wasn't on board with him going to Japan right away and that he wished I could come with him, but he was sorry I couldn't. And that made me feel even more sad. I said it's completely fine if he goes to Japan, as he can make his own decisions, but I was still a little hurt that I felt like he didn't consider I've always wanted to go with him. And that I felt he didn't want to go with me. And then we got into an argument about this whole mess.


AITA for being hurt that my bf would rather go to Japan with his friend instead?