AITA TL;dr, my friends had my portable mattress and didn’t respect it according to my wishes, their dog pissed on it, and bed bugs destroyed it. They angrily gave me $50 but our friendship is now strained and I don’t know that that is a fair repayment. They never even told me it was gone.

I loaned a portable roll up queen size mattress to my couple friends bc I wasn’t using it. I had obtained the mattress from a friend. My friends used it as a lounge bed in their family room. They were always on it, their pets too. They alluded to having sex on it. They had it for about a year, and tried taking ownership of it. I always reminded them that it belonged to me. I once was going to repossess it after I found out they fornicated on it, but felt bad bc then it wouldn’t be used and they enjoyed it so much. I asked that they don’t have sex on it any more. (They did not listen to me)

Recently, their dog developed medical problems and pissed on the bed. Then they got bed bugs and got rid of a lot of their belongings. When one of them was showing off their clean, uncluttered apartment to me post bed bug fiasco, I noticed the bed wasn’t in its usual spot. “Where’s the mattress?” I asked. “Oh, the dog pissed it and bed bugs and we threw it out”. She said nothing about being sorry, about replacing it or compensating me. 

So I waited until they were done replacing bed bug things and shit settled down. I researched bed prices and they’re at least $100 and found a reasonable roll up mattress for $150. 

I told them last night I wanted to “talk about my mattress that was thrown away, which I discovered on my own and wasn’t told about”. They immediately became defensive. One of them was about to buy weed and instead gave me the $50 and said “fuck you, it was used anyway!” And left. The other stayed to hear what I had to say but was clearly triggered (she has mania) and became hysterical. She told me I was shaming her about sex on the mattress, that I was immature and talking about a fake reality about the sex. She said she was traumatized from the bed bugs and the mattress has bugs on it. I relied that regardless, it had been pissed on by their dog recently and they weren’t using it. She told me she (she is also my ex girlfriend) has bought me things including my computer, that I have broken things of hers (I also have mania) and that I should basically accept the mattress being gone as repayment of those things. The other partner returned and when I asked what if hers I have broken, she started “well emotionally...” and I stopped her. I said physical objects - I have not broken your physical objects. (I had mania and was very mean to her two years ago and she hasn’t forgiven me but we’ve never spoken about it )

