Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : As the title suggests, I called my friend out for taking the other side of the argument in a petty way.

There are multiple people involved, so I’m gonna give the first friend the title of ‘B’ and the second friend the title of ‘J’, the rest will be referred to as the group.

I’ve been friends with the group, B, and J since elementary school. There hasn’t been anything that gets in between us too harshly in between the years. Just some simple friend disputes of who gets what and all that, the normal stuff.

Throughout knowing B, he was a loyal friend of mine and the group. He was a friend that could be counted on for situations. Being a middle-man that would look at both sides of the conflict and find the best alternative to those involved. Fast forward to sophomore year of high school. He moved away, which-of course-made all of us pretty sad for the moment. We kept in contact using Discord and host a server for our friends to just chat around in.

Amongst the group, it is seen as a usual friend hangout, just dudes being dudes. There are some rules, but they are very flexible. They are in place due to previous arguments that have happened between some of the members of the group there. 

B likes to have these rules seem like they are set in stone rather than sponge.
Enter in post-moving B, a sudden devil's advocate, who wears the title like a badge of honor. Over the years, B and I have grown apart, not to a horrible extent, we would still talk to each other and catch up, things were normal up until I posted a link to a gofundme for another friend in another group.

The link got deleted promptly, which made me upset because it was important to me. I check the audit logs to see who deleted it, and it was another friend from the group, not B. I asked him why he deleted it in the server, which started a whole argument between he and I. Later, B got involved. Calling me the A-hole in the situation because I didn’t take it directly to DM’s rather than the server and that I was stupid for doing so an hour after everything was settled between me and the other guy. I figured he was right and decided to just deal with it for the time being. When we elect another mod in the group, or when someone else comes into a power close to his, he gets extremely sad and will often leave the server.

I talked about it with other friends in the group, who I showed the messages from B, and they also mention that he has become rude over the years, the only one he has not been rude to is J. Leaving J as an ally on his end. J and I are good friends as well, until this point.

There were more things that B has done which I just bottle, but I got tired of it. In the chat, I mention in a petty and passive-aggressive tone that “anyone who assigns themselves the title of ‘devil’s advocate’ is just being a cunt with a title.” While I don’t mention B directly, I mean it towards him. Which, in turn angers J towards me as well because it caused B to leave the server. I’ve apologized to J so far, but I would rather not apologize to B because he causes everyone grief.

I would be the asshole in this situation I think because I tend to hold grudges over pet peeves. Like going against the grain without reason or purpose. 

So I guess, am I the a-hole?

Tl;dr    Long-time friend of mine has become rude towards the group, I called him out for being rude and always being on the opposing side in a petty manner, this angers another friend and I worry about the friendship being tarnished because we all suck at letting things go, especially as hot-headed teens.