so I moved to a new city back in December to start a new job, and on my first day of training I met a girl in the same training class we’ll call D.  D was immediately open about the vast majority of her personal life the day I met her, and she told me about how she lost one of her kids in an accident, and about how she had cheated on her boyfriend at one point and now he’s super insecure. 

Anyway, aside from all her baggage, D seemed like a fun person to hang around and we chatted on breaks and got to be friends. Then she confided in me that her boyfriend (father of her kids) gets physical with her. I didn’t really think it was any of my business, but I assured her that if she ever wanted to leave the guy that i would help her. Gradually she reveals some crazy shit to me, like how he should have gone to prison for 5 years and that he was kidnapped as a kid, and she tells me that she’s manipulated her friends into “sabotaging” him and their relationship, whatever that means. 

Flash forward to week 2. Yes, week 2. She told me all of this within the first week. Red flag. 

D asks me if i wanted to talk to her about a dream she had.  Now, I’ve never put any stock in dreams meaning anything because I personally very rarely dream and the ones i have had have been absurdly and unintelligibly weird, so I told her so, but she told me anyway: she had a dream about her and i (we’re both bisexual women but i have absolutely ZERO attraction to her) making out in tshirts on her bed. I played it off and said “yeah i’ve had weird dreams too” but have always thought it was really creepy and disconcerting. She also mentioned to me at one point that she would probably try to have sex with me if she gets drunk, which was also really fuckin weird. 

Flash forward again to month 2. D has since met a girl near her desk and fallen in love with her, CONSTANTLY telling everyone except this girl that she’s “the light of D’s world” and “the most beautiful person D’s ever met” (they met at the end of December). One night at 2am, I suddenly get a text from D’s number from her abusive boyfriend, asking me if she’s been looking at any other guys or girls. I don’t answer, but i tell her he asked me first thing the next morning; she was close to leaving him at the time and this was supposedly the final straw, and i told her i supported her leaving this chump. 

She tells him she’s leaving him and he immediately does the asshole thing and tries to get her flowers. so he texts me again at 2am asking how to get them to the building, and i straight up told him to STOP contacting me, that i want nothing to do with him or their relationship, and he accuses me of having bf problems, so i just say something to the effect of “i’m too gay for bf problems and i don’t want to be a part of this”.  he tells me he won’t bother me again. 

the next week, D’s boyfriend left and took their kids to his mom’s in Texas and took their car to get there, so i had to take D home from work. As i was getting directions home, he calls her and, when he finds out i’m driving her home, tells her to put him on speaker. He gets my attention by saying “Hey, Jelllybears.”

I just say “What?”

“Why did you tell me you were gay? Why are you fucking my wife?”

not even “are you”. “WHY are you”. 

I didn’t know what to do, so i laughed. I laughed really hard. It probably wasn’t the smartest reaction, but I didn’t expect this at all. It got less funny when he started cussing me out and calling me names, but i still point blank told him that he’s insecure and delusional. D does nothing. She says nothing, even while he’s cussing me out. I don’t even know what this guy looks like. we’ve never met. ever. and D is just sitting there, not even doing anything. I drop D off, and she thanks me for the ride tells me that he told her to text me and call me a piece of shit, and to expect that. So i was like “sure”. I stew over the fact that she didn’t do anything, but gave her the benefit of the doubt bc she’s probably legitimately afraid of this guy even if he’s a few states away. 

Then, a coworker tells me that she’s told people around the office that i was trying to start a fight between her and her boyfriend. i was furious when i heard that. It’s one thing to not apologize for not doing anything to even try and stop him from yelling and accusing me of shit i didn’t do, but now she’s spreading lies around the workplace about something that is completely contrary to my very nature. 

We haven’t spoken since, and he’s still in texas, but even when I decided to be the bigger person and apologize to just curb the drama, she sneers at me and refuses to even talk to me. 

I can’t help but wonder if i’m completely in the wrong here?? perhaps i didn’t have the best reaction but all i want is to go to work and make money and go home. i don’t need the high school rumor mill again. 

tldr: coworker’s bf accuses me of fucking her, and i laugh, and now she’s spreading rumors that i was starting a fight. aita?