Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST :  

I've worked with this guy for years, we're good at work friends.

My wife gets along with his GF and they've done a few things together, keep touch on facebook, text, etc. 

He wants to propose. I knew something was brewing when he talked about rings, but he had no plans yet. I can keep my mouth shut, although there was nothing to shut it for.

Then yesterday I get a cryptic text "what are you doing tomorrow" - that means some open ended, can you watch the kids type text. I hadn't seen my wife in 2 days she was visiting step-mom and our daughter.

So i'd kind of blown off the idea of kid watching. He got on to play a game online and elaborates - he was going to propose. He insisted on absolute silence, don't tell anybody. Well, at that moment my wife sent me a snapchat. I responded and mentioned this. I knew she'd want to know. Of course she starts talking about things I can't tell him because I'm "not telling anyone" ... I know she's not THAT close to his GF and she can be trusted, but I want him to feel comfortable. The back and forth goes on a few with me in the middle, him hemming at details (GF may be sick, not sure if I'll do it tomorrow) and my wife tossing things around. All the while I'm playing.

In the end it was up in the air.

This AM. 10ish, I get a text "I'm going to ask if you're OK, would noon work?" Uh.. haven't heard from the wife yet (you'll see why) and uh.. ah.. no reason I can't - so I say sure. I send her a text and say "hey, he's looking at noon, if you want to come help with the kids cool, if you want to avoid that, that's OK too"

I knew when I got "whatever" for a response something was way off.

the TL:DR part of THAT conversation was that I "ignored all her suggestions on plans" and I did not call her to say good night - well, we'd said good night about a dozen times at 8 PM and there were no PLANS. Now I'm being told that me, friend and GF can do "our thing" and she doesn't need to be a part of it. That I can do me and she knows how this goes, same old feeling where I don't care about her.

Hard to tell what's bugging her more, her not getting a good night call, me not planning with her.... she is pissed, wants no part of this.

I KNOW I could have paid better attention,but I'm easily distracted. Obviously my relationship is more important, but I was preoccupied on several levels and didn't think I missed anything. I also was trying to be accommodating to everyone.

AITA for not pulling her in more and be much more explicit or is she overreacting?

TL:DR - friend wants to propose, asks for help watching the kids, my lack of paying enough attention/involving my wife enough has now turned it into me and them vs. her and she wants no part of me.