Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : I was in conversation with my partner, and we got to the talking point about the Midwest, United States. What started the argument was when I said: "When you decolonize your education, the Midwest is a lot more interesting than what we are told in school." To their reply, they said that "Why are you blaming me?" To that point, I realize that I messed up my grammar. I used the wrong pronoun. I should have said "one" or rephrased the statement to be a bit more general. Using "you" made it more of an attack than a generality. When I tried to explain this, they said "You do this a lot though," and then pulled out their phone and basically left the conversation. 

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They shut down like this a lot. My first attempt to backtrack and explain myself just fell on deaf ears. It felt like I basically had to beg them to get a response for some kind of feedback about what I said. After one more attempt, I got them to open up about this pattern in my behaviour. They went on to say how there are a few types of speech (academic, business, etc.) and that when we are not aware of how we are speaking, it really comes out to be attacking, especially when I used "you" in the first statement. 

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I realized that yeah, I probably just did come off as attacking. My conundrum here is whether I am the asshole because I put no forethought into how I said what I said, whether it was just of them to shut down in the middle of the conversation because I said something rude (and they don't owe me an answer), or whether shutting down is a ploy to just bait me into being in the wrong while I try and defend myself in terms they established. 

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My brain hurts thinking about this tbh. Going over this interaction hurts because I feel like I do not have the energy or mental ability to see all angles. They shut down so often in somewhat serious conservations that I feel I cannot state my case without being a bit bias. I could really use some help. Thank you for your time in reading my troubles btw 