Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : My best friend has not seen a doctor in 10 years.  She is 22 years old and has never seen a gynecologist. She is not a virgin and had multiple sex partners. Those sex partners both slept with women in the past who have had HPV type 18 and 16. These types are the most cancerous ones and also usually completely asymptomatic. 

She had suffered severe trauma last year and has PTSD. Refuses to go to therapy, and thinks her mental issues are not that big of a deal. 

She is usually strong and controls herself, until she bursts out and all the mental issues explode in her at once. When she bursts, we are talking massive breakdowns that make her fall ill and bedridden. Only when she is in that state she is able to express her true feelings regarding the trauma. But after she recovers, she usually reverts back to denial and pretending to act normal.

She also has stomach problems, probably gastritis. Does not get any medicine for it, but “handles” her flares with camomile tea. 

Her family is very “natural remedy” oriented and very put off by modern medicine as well. They do not consider that having not had a blood test in 10 years is abnormal, nor that their fully adult daughter has never been tested for uterus cancer or breast cancer. 

We argue about this every day. She begged me to just stop asking her to see a doctor. She told me that if I don’t stop, she will simply not be able to be friends with me anymore. Every time I bring it up she straight up goes into panic mode and turns into a complete rage fueled beast. She tells me I am hurting her and I am the cause of her distress.  

However, my stubbornness is getting the best of me and it got to the point where I would rather destroy our friendship for the small chance she gets a reality check and realizes just how wrong her mentality is and at what cost her negligence and ignorance came with. The worst part is, every time she has a breakdown, it is me who has to clean up the mess, take care of her and nurse her. I have to hear her cry and scream for hours in pain just because she refuses to take any painkiller. 

Sometimes she has insomnia for days due to the PTSD, refuses to take any sleeping aid apart from valerian root tea. I have literally an entire stock of various sleeping pills and no matter who much I try to teach her, explain to her about the substance and how it acts on the brain etc etc she still won’t take anything. It severely impacts her academic life. 

We argue every day about it. I begged her to at least get a full blood test, and a gynecologist visit for a full range of tests, most importantly a pap smear. I even offered her to pay for a couple of therapy sessions with a very highly ranked therapist just to try it out. She flat out refused and told me she feels healthy and nothing is wrong with her.

I am making her feel miserable but truth be told, I’d rather lose my best friend than accept her ignorant behavior and mentality. 

