Will try to make a long explanation short. I’m a generally sarcastic, joker who has always ribbed people, as was done to me by my own family. That’s just how we all were, and you learned that it was all in good fun, and to not take it personally.

As I got older, I would say this trait subsided a bit, especially as I dated because I was shy around new people. However, as I become more and more comfortable, I slipped back into my normal personality - which included these jokes.

Being a year into marriage, and knowing my husband for a few prior, I thought he was used to it - and he really hadn’t shown a problem with it. But now, he’s telling me that it’s too much, that I’m rude, a bitch at times. I don’t recall saying anything particularly mean, although I would never say I don’t toe the line at times. It seems to be becoming more of a problem though, one that could seriously hurt our relationship.

The other issue, is that it’s apparently impacting his confidence. He says he’s not confident in his body, that his once extroverted personality has become introverted, and other similar things. I never would intentionally do this and I want to resolve it - but I honestly don’t understand what I’m doing that could have such a huge effect. I want to cry at times knowing that I’m such a horrible person to make him feel this way, and for something I don’t truly understand. It’s just a part of me, a huge part that feels to be me at my most comfortable level. 

Now, I’m not ignorant to the fact that jokes get old, and sometimes they can be taken too far, or said harshly. I myself had these moments growing up, taking shit from my own family, so I do see that it can be a lot. My question is, AmItheAsshole for continuing to make these jokes that are such a big part of my personality? Should I cut this area of my personality out altogether? Or is my husband overreacting, and just making me feel bad? Is there a middle ground, and if so, how can I achieve it? TIA