Hear me out, I genuinely don’t know.

So I (M 20) live in a three bedroom apartment with two other guys (both M 20). We all have girlfriends who come and go, but one girlfriend (M 19) lives with us permanently. The three of us guys pay rent out of pocket, while the girlfriend in particular (we’ll call her Amy) has a room on campus that she has never once slept in, and that room costs more than what she would pay to live here. She hardly ever visits her own room. 

Amy eats food that her roommate pays for, uses up utilities with us, uses our bathroom, etc etc. She doesn’t buy food. She doesn’t pay for anything, except for herself. This is typically fine, she can pay her own food and expenses. But she wastes money paying for a place on campus when it could make living at my apartment cheaper for both of my roommates and myself. Even she would pay less.

This is something I’ve never voiced to my roommate who dates her, because I know the girlfriends me and my other roommate bring over don’t pay rent either. The difference is they come temporarily and leave. Half the time they’re not here. And while they temporarily take up space and do the same things as Amy, they leave just as often to stay at where they live.

Amy and her boyfriend knew prior to moving in that Amy would be staying with us full-time. She’s cool as a roommate, but she also takes up a lot of space, makes the place dirty, sits on our couch all day, uses our shower and bathroom constantly.

My parents wonder why I live with 4 people full time and three pay rent. It’s more of a burden for them when they help me in affording college, and it would make rent cheaper for the other three.

The main reason why Amy doesn’t pay rent, is because her parents don’t know she lives with a bunch of guys. Her, and her boyfriend, have no plan on telling her parents. I can understand, but her parents are also paying thousands every semester for a room she’s never slept in. Amy and her boyfriend would rather not approach the issue then pay less for where they’re living because their parents cover most of it. I pay out of pocket for where I live a lot of the time. It’s tougher for me, when I feel it’d be easier if she paid rent.

I approached my roommate who dates Amy, and low-key asked that since he knew beforehand that Amy would be living with us full-time, why she didn’t pay rent this year. He maintained the fact that since there’s only 3 people on the lease, it shouldn’t affect me at all and it’s not my problem. If she didn’t exist it wouldn’t make a difference. 

It’s a small apartment, and she’s constantly around. She takes up a lot of space. 

I don’t know, I’m really unsure if I’m in the wrong place even asking.

Am I an asshole for pulling my roommate aside after several months this morning, and asking him why she doesn’t pay rent? 

