Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : My boyfriend (25) and I (21) have been together for 3.5 years now. We met in university, he was my university tour guide and I was a potential applicant. Long story short we got together and lived together all throughout my university years up to present day. We have had our ups and downs like most couples, but I because I was so young when we started dating (he is my first ever relationship) some of our downs have been because of my immaturity. I have struggled and made great efforts to mature and put myself in his shoes, and we both have made a lot of improvements in our relationship and no longer fight over stupid little things, but I still feel like there we have a long way to go to perfect the relationship. One of our biggest differences is the difference in our temperament. I am an on-top-of-things, no procrastinating, blunt, let-talk-about-it-now sort of girl, and he's mellow, mull-it-over, take-his-time sort of guy. It is often frustrating because he would sometimes become really gloomy or sad, and I would have no idea why because he showed no indication before whatsoever and doesn't want to talk about what is plaguing him when I do ask.

Yesterday he picked me up from work and said we were going to dinner, and that he brought a formal dress for me to change into. I was very surprised, but assumed it was just a spontaneous nice little date arranged by him. After dinner we went for a walk in a nearby park, and he popped the question in a quiet corner of the park with a ring and some balloons. I was very happy and it showed, but I gently told him no, not yet, because of the above reasons and also because neither he nor I have a stable job or settled place to live yet (we still rent and dont plan on living here for the long term), and I feel like we should talk about marriage only when we both have stable jobs and income. He tried to argue that we can figure all of that out after becoming husband and wives, but I respectfully disagreed and said I don't want to rush into things. He seemed understanding at the time, and we went home and knowing that he might be bottling his emotions, prepared a bath for him and gave him a massage before we went to sleep.

He was very moody and sad when we woke up this morning, and asked me constantly if I still liked him and if I plan on having a future with him. I keep reassuring him that I do, but he didnt seem convinced and is still very emotionally unstable when we both left for work. I'm starting to think maybe I shouldn't have said no or the way I said it is too blunt/insensitive. Am I an asshole for saying no?