Two of my friends I've known for a while are getting married this weekend. It's out of town for me so I am getting a hotel for the weekend so I'm not driving all day the day of. The thing is, it's smack dab in the middle of Richmond, Va. During the weekend around a bunch of museums. The hotel costs are almost $500. That's not including food and other things I need to get done to look nice for the wedding. I.e. hair and nails. (Side note I work in a soil and concrete lab so my nails look disgusting. It would be trashy to show up at a wedding with 6 inch long blond roots. The rest of my hair is a faded blue) Plus at the risk of sounding a bit selfish, my birthday is on the same day. So I'm giving up celebrating my birthday to celebrate thier wedding. I'm not saying that my presence is a gift enough. Im also not saying I need acknowledgement from them about my birthday on their wedding day. I'm not that important friend wise and its their day. Am I the asshole if I dont get them a wedding gift?