Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : My sister and I have a large age gap. She is 20 years older than I am. She met her husband when they were both in service and have been together since I was 5 years old. I just can’t stand him because he has such a condescending personality towards my family and belittling to others not like him. 

She has always bragged about her husband being really smart and being a physician who makes a lot of money and is able to provide a lavish lifestyle for their family compared to what we grew up with in our low income family. Her advice to me was to always find an intelligent man that was able to provide for me. I was always like yeah okay sure 🤷🏽‍♀️.... 


I never really understood the beef between our family and her husband until recent years where they moved closer by to the rest of our family. From when I was younger I just knew he was a smart individual who was going to school to become a physician. He is now a surgeon. Has switched locations multiple times anytime he doesn’t like where he works. When I was younger I thought that was normal. Now older I’ve learned he has continuously jumped from jobs every 6 months and the longest he’s stayed anywhere was less than a 1.5yr because he won’t work with anyone he doesn’t get along with. 

Our mother is the only person out of our parents to have contact with their children because my sister and dad don’t get along. However, every time my mom tries to feed the kids, change their diapers, or carry them my brother in law would helicopter my mom on how to do it or in one case actually pushed her away because he didn’t want her to do it. My mom has discussed it many times with them that she has raised 6 children and was feeling offended. Also, anytime my mom would offer remedies to help with colds or sleep deprivation with the children he would tell her he’s a surgeon in a first world country and her advice is toxic. I was quite taken a back because all my mom offered was maybe giving the babies massages or giving them steam baths to allow them to relax and stop crying while sick. 

Around tax time last year. My sister was telling me about how much she dreads doing it. I am a graduate in finance and tax, so I offered my help. Our brother is also a tax preparer and also offered as well. We follow up with our sister and she says no her husband doesn’t feel comfortable with us performing the complexity of their income information, so they will be going to a professional. At that point my brother and I were like okay, that wasn’t slightly offensive I guess. We later find out they decided to go to H&amp;R Block. My sister calls me upset because they’ve been there the entire day and the person doesn’t seem to know what they’re doing. I told her no shit it’s H&amp;R Block, they’re not CPAs..... 

I also at one point after college had to live with my sister and her family right after graduation because I had no where else to live and was unemployed. She offered me a place to stay with her husband’s consent as well. While, I stayed there I was babysitting their kids cleaning the common areas of the house. Constantly my sister would complain to me about her husband not helping around and spending frivolous amounts of money. 

The parts that bothered me the most were anytime that my sister would openly ask her husband and I for opinions on furthering her career, he would tell my sister she was being stupid or selfish and then downplay anything I had to say because how could I give advice if I needed to have my sister save me from homelessness. I got really upset and said he was completely out of line on that. The kids also felt uncomfortable with expressing the things they liked because of their dad shooting them down. I’ve also seen him lose his cool and yell at their 2-yr old son because he wouldn’t eat his food, so he just took the food and threw it all away. I had to walk in and intervene asking if he needed to step aside or needed some space because I could watch the baby. He said he knew what he was doing, the baby was just making him late for errands and just got briefly upset.

I got into an argument with him over me saying IHOP lying about changing their name to IHOB and he said I should stop spreading inaccurate information because they did in fact do it if I bothered reading the news properly. So I was just stuck at wait what 🤦🏽‍♀️🙃... 

I lived day in and day out with them for 2 months and I personally just felt it was so toxic and exhausting just to be there. I ended up leaving the moment I had found a job and secure place to live. Before I left I got into an argument with my sister and her ultimately telling me that she agrees with her husband that I and the rest of our family just use her and take her for her money and her sincerity. I was just like where the hell did this come from and I told her thanks for everything, but I hope you realize there’s better things out there and get a divorce if it just weren’t for the kids.

TL;DR 
My sister’s husband acts like a condescending prick to everyone and I told her I wish she would just get a divorce even though they have kids. 