So, a bit of backstory: 

I am a violinist, and I have played since before I can remember. I also have arthritis, the first major episode of which occurred when I was 14. Since then, it has only gotten worse, with occasional flares that sometimes leave me unable to walk, but it was always fine, because I had my violin.

I went to college, and one of my majors was music. As time went on, I started feeling pain in my fingers whenever I played, but I usually just ignored it. Eventually, though, it got to the point where I lost the use of my pinkies. I spent my last semester relearning how to play my instrument, still in pain, without 2 of my fingers.  At this point, my fingers and hands and wrists hurt all the time, whether or not I was using them.

After graduation, I completely lost the ability to play, it just hurt too bad. I spent two months searching for answers, for a solution to my pain; I was given restricting plastic casts, horribly painful cortisone shots in the nodes in my palms, even a round of steroids that made me increasingly manic. I had to go on antidepressants, because I was sinking into a terrible depression.

Finally, a doctor finally realized that I'm double jointed, and the hyperextension was causing inflammation in my fingers, which was causing the locking and clicking sensations that were causing me so much pain. The solution was simple- custom fitted splints (interlocking silver rings) that prevent my fingers from hyperextending. I was fitted, and a few weeks later, the splints arrived. I put them on, and suddenly, I had the use of my hands back. Never mind the thousands of dollars in medical bills I would have to pay, or the years of pain that were now behind me- I could play again!

Fast forward to more recent times. I took on a temporary job in retail, which I'll be leaving this Saturday for unrelated reasons. At least 5 times a shift, somebody comments on my rings. Sometimes, it's a compliment, sometimes, it's a question, and sometimes, it's an insult. The latter happens a lot more frequently than you would expect.

At first, I just sort of went along with it, chuckling and saying 'Thanks!' in that cheery, fake, retail voice. However, as months passed, I became more and more frustrated by it, to the point where I started pointing out to customers who openly insulted my splints that they are medical devices I have to wear in order to avoid immense pain, if just in an attempt to get them to realize that insulting strangers for literally no reason is not okay.

Even the compliments sting. I know they aren't meant to be hurtful, but they are. People compliment me on something that I did not choose, that I cannot change, that, to be honest, really sucks. They're complimenting me on having such debilitating arthritis that I cannot get through the day without these splints on my fingers, splints that have caused callouses and other such annoyances (for example, I can't pick up a glass of water without the entire restaurant turning to stare at the sudden percussion). They don't mean it that way, but that's how it is.

The questions are somehow worse than both. People inquiring as to why I wear these splints feels like a really personal violation. Would you ask somebody why they're in a wheelchair? Of course not! These splints look kind of similar to jewelry... in the same way that a wheelchair looks kind of similar to a chair. They are medical devices, and they're actually not that uncommon. But people asking about them is really uncomfortable, because I have three options: 1) Deflect the question, and potentially anger the customer 2) Lie, and potentially anger the customer (I'm a bad liar) 3) Tell the truth, and violate my own privacy.

Whenever a complete stranger says something about my 'rings', whether it's an insult or a compliment or a question, it really upsets me. I tend to get short with them, just saying whatever I'm required by store policy to say, hurrying up to get the transaction over with. I'm not openly rude, or mean, or loud, or anything, just blunt and brief. I stop putting on the happy retail worker facade, and try to just get it over with. The only time I've ever gotten visibly upset was when a customer yelled at me about how 'you stupid millennials waste all your money on jewelry and other nonsense, no wonder your a\*\* is in retail!' I was shaken, and told the customer to have a nice day after the transaction was over, and asked if I could go on a break. I then spent my fifteen minutes sobbing in my car.

I've had people grab my hands to look at my fingers- again, complete strangers, while I am working- or even try to take my rings off to look at them. That's quite rare, but still, immensely upsetting.

I'm leaving retail, hopefully for good, but I'm still worried about my past reactions to people questioning my splints. When I'm out in the real world, not working, people have never asked me about them, except at places like jewelry stores, and at rehearsals, for understandable and legitimate reasons. I don't think this will be a problem once I'm no longer working at the store, but still, I am not sure if I'm in the right here for being upset.

My rings don't look like jewelry, really, because of the way they are fitted to my fingers (extremely tight so as to properly maintain my knuckles, not like rings), and because of their shape, and because they lack any ornamentation at all. Though I do understand the curiosity, I don't think it's an excuse to ask a stranger about it. To me, it's like asking someone why they have a cast, or crutches, or a hearing aid, or any other medical apparatus. It doesn't make sense to me that people should be excused for ignorance, because my splints are just that- splints. Medical apparatuses. And, why would you openly insult or question someone's fashion choices? Is it okay to criticize a tattoo, or to ask someone why on earth they need to wear those shoes?  That side of it doesn't make sense to me either, for reasons of common courtesy.

I will have to wear these reminders of a time of incredible physical and psychological pain for the rest of my life, or I will return to that point of pain. AITA for getting upset when complete strangers point it out?