  

For context: I am currently in Africa doing an internship and my sister is in our home country and has been mentally unstable for about three years now. All of our contact has been through messages sent back and forth. We both handle our problems very differently. I am a person who will apologize quickly, so I lash out once I truly lost my patience and she is more the person who will wait until something blows over.

So we have had a small argument about something insignificant a few days ago. I decided to swallow my pride and apologize to her. I thought I did so in a very carefully constructed way, telling I should not have done the things I did and that I was sorry. She did not respond. It might have been her way of handling the argument we had. Cooling down before sending a message, so that it would not be written out of anger. I decided to text my mom asking if I had done anything wrong.

As time went by, I was getting more annoyed, since I was the one reaching out and swallowing my pride. I did not want to show any of this anger to my sister though, since we have always been very close and me hurting her might sent her back into mental instability. I ended up venting a lot of my anger towards my mother and saying that I want my sister to apologize to me. She managed to calm me down and I went to sleep. 

This morning, I saw that my sister had sent some messages and I was secretly hoping they were apologies. However, These messages were just to show her side of the story and telling me she does not want to include our mother in our arguments. Then there were some casual messages afterwards to try and end this entire situation. This almost broke my patience, since I felt the only reason I included our mother was to protect her from myself. Additionally, she still ignored the apology message I had sent the night before. I sent one message saying that I did not like it that she ignored my apology, because I had to use a lot of self-control to type it. I think it might have been her way of putting this entire situation behind her and moving on. I feel that I need her to at least say that she appreciates that I apologized.

Now I feel like I might sent some hurtful messages if I contact her again, since my patience is almost spent, but I still want the opinion of others. She was right that I should have not included our mother, but the situation gnawed at me and I had to get a second opinion. 

So now I would like to ask you guys: Am I the asshole by saying I want her to acknowledge my apology?