Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : So a bit of backstory: my grandmother is 87, and losing her memory a bit. My mother is part of a sewing group that makes bereavement dresses for parents of infants who have passed away. They have too many dresses right now, and have a backlog waiting to be used.

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My Nana and I had talked about me using part of the lace from her wedding dress to wear as a veil on my wedding day. This was important to me as I am hopeful, but not positive, that she will make it ten months until I get married. Her dress is handmade lace. We had even talked about me wearing it, but I'm a good four inches taller and not built like a ballerina, so it likely wouldn't fit.

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I had told my mother about this, and also my fiance. Nana, when she found out about my mother's group, she donated her dress to be used for the cause. She says she told my mother to save part of it, my mother doesn't remember, and it's really possible that either of them could be mistaken. 

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So. Would I be the asshole if I asked for part of the lace skirt back and offered a cash donation to cover other supplies for the organization? If they were short on dresses I would never consider this, but knowing they have a lot of extras I am rationalizing that I could help cover thread, needles, etc for the volunteers.