Is NOBODY wrong in the post ? POST : I (39m) have two boys, ages 3 and 5. The older while was diagnosed with autism and is definitely on the spectrum while the younger had some developmental delays and because of older brother's diagnosis we were able to get him diagnosed too so we could qualify him for services. It's now apparent that the younger is catching up and although he has some issues, he's becoming pretty typical for his age. 

It was brought to my attention by my wife that I totally favor the older child. I was doing so without realizing it and the more I thought about it it's true. I regard my eldest as my precious first born that I would do anything for. I dote on him and help him through any tantrums he may have over his inflexibilities. I play with him and smile and laugh and truly enjoy my time with him. 

As for my younger child I love him as my child but oftentimes I treat him the way I would treat someone else's kid.  He's around, he's ok, but whatever.  I sometimes feel like playing with him is a chore and I definitely don't enjoy it as much as when I play with my older one.  I don't feel as close to him and when he tantrums over something dumb that a typical 3 yr old tantrums over I just let him tantrum and cry it out.  Sometimes I can't stand him and try to avoid him. 

I really feel like an asshole because I know I favor the eldest and I feel like I don't even want to try to like the younger one more.  I feel like I'm a good dad to both but the younger one is definitely getting the short end of the stick. To top it off everyone says the younger one has my personality and is totally like me while the eldest that I favor is very much like my wife. 

Any parents out there have any advice or thoughts?  How much of an asshole am I?