Recently I've been struggling with my mental health. I've taken time out of University to try to deal with it so I'm staying at home with my parents right now. I only have one friend here and we've been friends for over ten years and because I'm home we've been hanging out a bit. Never loads because I can't cope with that. I don't particularly enjoy going out and it's tiring to be with her.

&amp;#x200B;

Anyway, last week my mood crashed and I felt that it was impossible to keep our plans. Instead of saying anything, I just didn't go on Facebook. We'd arranged to meet up twice over the weekend and one of them was a food event we had to get tickets for. These were free, you just had to have one so they knew how many people were going. I didn't go online for five days and didn't talk to anyone but my parents and my therapist. I knew the entire weekend that she would be super pissed at me but I couldn't face speaking to her.

&amp;#x200B;

Cut to today. I was reading some blog posts online and came across one about fighting social anxiety. It gave me the push I needed to get onto Facebook and send a long message explaning that I'd been really down and that I knew I shouldn't have vanished but I didn't have the courage to go online and message her. She replied 'ok'.

&amp;#x200B;

Reading the messages she'd sent over the past five days showed that she hadn't gotten worried about me, just angry. That upset me because it seems that no matter how much I share about my mental health her replies are, almost word for word: 'that's not good' and 'do this thing and you might feel better'. I know that doesn't sound bad but it's literally all she says and then we'll talk about other stuff. It upsets me because I try to take into account her feelings all the time. I felt awful all weekend because I knew I was hurting her and she doesn't even seem to care that I feel like shit. And she complains to me all the time about everything wrong in her life and I listen and listen and try as hard as I can to be supportive.

&amp;#x200B;

But I do tend to avoid messaging her and I've done stuff like this in the past (although not to this extent). I don't try to arrange to meet up because she does it first and I never know what to do or if she'll be interested in what I suggest. Maybe I'm just the shitty friend? I don't know. Please help me out here - am I the asshole?