Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : This is a long one, tl;dr will be provided.

This actually happened last year, but it has been gnawing at me for some time and I figured posting here might help me put the issue to rest. For context, this occurred at the very beginning of the summer after I graduated high school in June. I had been dating my girlfriend at the time for about 4 months, the first 3 of which were wonderful. However, things started to take a turn for the worse towards the final days of the school year. My Ex has moderate to severe BPD, and this began to cause problems toward the end of the relationship. She told me about it relatively early on, and I made sure to be as supportive as possible. Since I’ve been told by friends that I’m a good listener and someone to count (at least I’d like to think so) I let her know that she could talk to me about anything if she felt the need. Although she was rather closed off at first, she rather quickly began to “vent” to me on a regular basis. These instances became more and more frequent and progressively got darker as time went on, and I honestly became less sympathetic. She would put down her friends and others close to her for what I would consider mild inconveniences, often exclaiming that “They know what they’re doing, if they don’t support me or ask me how I’m feeling if I look upset than how are they real friends?” I’m very much a person that likes to cut people slack. A few minutes late? No problem. Didn’t talk to me for very long at a party? All good, lots of people you need to attend to. But it seemed to me that she took these kinds of things as an affront, as if there were a setlist of requirements to being in her personal circle. Not only did this attitude seem to alienate her friends, but it also started to alienate me. 

By the last two weeks, I was rather drained and honestly waiting for a good time to have a serious conversation about our relationship. Everything culminated the night before we broke up. We were at her best friends graduation party with a shitload of mutual friends. I drove her there and spent the majority of the first few hours with her and some of the other couples. After some time and a few beers, I began to wander around and talk to people who went to our school who I had never gotten around to meeting before. Honestly, I was having a blast, and assumed she was with her friends feeling the same. When I returned about 30 min later she was gone, so I went to look for her and found her alone in a quiet portion of the house. She was rather distraught and didn’t tell me why, despite my asking. I quickly became fed up and told her I was going back to the party and she could join me if she wanted to which she declined. After drinking much more as the night went on, I caught back up with her when it was time for bed. In the middle of the night I drunkenly woke up to her hysterically crying next to me. When I asked what was wrong she said she knew I didn’t love her and that I was considering how she felt at all. I was kind of taken aback at first, but so drunk that I just told her we should talk about it in the morning. The next day I told her rather frankly that I thought she was an unessecarily negative person and that, as hard a burden as it is, mental illness is no excuse to treat people the way she had been.
I told her that she wasn’t being rational and she should seriously consider seeing a therapist about these emotions and that it could be seriously beneficial to he mental health. After some heated arguing I told her that it would be best to break up under the current circumstances and so we did. Last I heard she continues to maintain that I’m an emotionless rock who couldn’t understand her point of view, and sometimes I find myself believing her. Maybe I could have handled it better?  Let me have it.


Tl;dr Ex has serious emotional problems and negative habits that made me break up with her, she has said that I just couldn’t see her side and wasn’t supportive enough and too “cold and objective”