**Backstory:** I met this girl Amber in December 2017 who lives 40 minutes away. We never officially dated, but we had mutual interests in each other and talked for a few weeks until I decided to end things since I had a girlfriend at the time. She was really upset and we stopped communicating.

A few months later in April we started talking again. By this time, my former girlfriend and I have already broken up. Amber and I became really close as friends. Her family was familiar with who I was and we became very comfortable with each other. After some time, we started taking interest in each other again. However, we soon stopped talking again because I began talking to another girl. Again, she was really upset and we stopped communicating in July.

Both these times, I admit I was the asshole. I really did have feelings for her and we get along *extremely* well but our situation was difficult to maintain at the time since we live somewhat far from each other and I had been dealing with situations of my own

We recently reignited our friendship in September at a wrestling tournament and since then we've gotten closer than ever. We are extremely open and comfortable with each other. I apologized for everything that I've put her through and we both agreed that we would never try talking again. After some months I started developing a crush on her but suppressed my feelings this time since we both agreed to stay friends. We hung out frequently and when we did she would be somewhat clingy and flirty but I thought nothing of it since she claimed that she's usually a clingy person. I had suspicions that she was also crushing on me but did not want to make any assumptions.

Curious as to if she was actually into me, I pitched the idea for her to hook up with my best friend Anthony who I see and hangout with almost everyday. If she did find interest in that idea then I would conclude she had no interest in me however if she didn't, then she was probably interested in me. Long story short, they started talking and Anthony was obviously really into her but she didn't feel the same. She constantly flaked on their plans and rarely texted him back. Amber and I still continued to talk normally since we were good friends.

**The Problem:**

Amber drunk texted me at a party one night asking why I have no interest in her. Since she was so clearly intoxicated I took this idea lightly. I allowed her two days to sober up and talk to me about it again and it was true: she still liked me. I exclaimed how I thought we were strictly friends. This conversation led me to confess that I also did have feelings for her but the problem was she was *still talking to Anthony*. She invited me over her house New Years Eve and we did countdown together. We both had drinks that night so she invited me to spend the night which I agreed to. It was around 2AM and I assumed that I would sleep on the floor beside the bed but she invited me to lay with her. She began to cuddle with me and eventually she made the move to kiss me which led to making out. After the night, we discussed how terrible this was of us to do and how extremely guilty we both felt. Since we both had a little to drink that night I assumed it was the alcohol.

Two days later she was over at my house and she spent the night at my place. Similar to New Year's night, we did the same thing which was initiated by her again. We **both agreed** that this was something we wanted however it was something I *had* to tell Anthony since he was  my best friend.

I end up telling Anthony about the situation in a one on one conversation. I left out the major details and kept it very short, only explaining how we took interest in each other with ZERO intention of hurting him. I apologized and emphasized how this was not intentional. He seemed totally cool about it saying how he appreciated how I came upfront to him about it and he made everything seem all good and normal. They were never officially dating, but he said he was already planning to end things with her and that it was all okay.

Every time I see him he avoids eye contact with me and rarely talks to me. My friends are telling me that he's been telling  ***a story*** to many people seeing if he should stay friends with me or not *(I say* ***a story*** *because he never asked me about what happened or how it happened so the story he is telling other people is most likely very flawed)*. They say that he's upset that I didn't tell him sooner and how he's just mad. I feel like a dick and I understand why he wouldn't want to be friends, but I want him to be upfront with me and let me know if we are cool or not rather than telling me we are cool but telling everyone different. When we talked one on one he made it seem like everything was all good and he forgave me. Now, he's acting different and almost even talking bad about me behind my back making me look like a villain. Am I really an asshole?