So my(19m) Father(61m) was diagnosed with Frontal Temporal Dementia two years ago. Right now he's in the moderate to severe stage which basically entails no short term memory, poor decision making, poor communication skills and poor body maintenance. All he does these days is go on long walks and sit in silence or sleep. In the past few months my mother(58f) has had increasing trouble getting him to shower. He will never shower on his own accord so she makes him. But in the last 2 months or so he's basically been refusing. Saying he'll do it it the morning or in the evening and then never doing it or just telling you to leave him alone. So up to this point he hadn't showered or changed his clothes in 29 days. He sleeps in his shoes and clothes. He's a big guy (6ft5"), although quite mild mannered, but we can't force him to do anything really.

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Recently my mum has been really stressed about it. She's been at her wits end for weeks and everybody else in the house can't stand the smell of him. There is literally no way to convince him or tempt him to have a shower, we've tried everything. My mum has had a couple of breakdowns this week crying and everything because it stresses her so much.

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So tonight I'd had enough and when everyone had gone to bed I went into the lounge where he was sleeping and just started filling up glasses and pouring luke warm water on him to wet his clothes. He got really annoyed and started walking after me to get me to stop, but I got a squirt bottle and kept squirting him as he's chasing me. This went on for like 10 minutes and he kept hiding in the lounge and when he opened the door I would wet his clothes more and he was cursing at me and shit. So basically I got him to take all his clothes off because they were soaking and he let me give him a wash with a cloth and soap because I told him mum would stop hassling him to have a shower every day. I took away his dirty clothes and got him some pajamas and new clothes for tomorrow morning to wear.

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So now he's clean basically and has clean clothes and he stopped being annoyed by it as soon as I stopped, but idk if it was harsh to do that it does seem inhumane, but something needed to be done.