So today while I was at work my girlfriend texted me that she was going to try out yoga at our college’s gym with her friends. She then said, “Also when I get home you should check me for lice apparently there’s an outbreak at the gym.”

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I reminded her that we have a special event coming up this weekend and we’re also flying out for a wedding in about 2 weeks. It would really suck to have those be canceled because we got lice.

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She responded that it’s not her fault that the ONE day she decided to go to the gym there happens to be lice there. Apparently the lice are only in the upstairs part of the gym, and that her two friends are still going. She said they’d leave if it looked shady.

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My response was, “I know you want to start doing yoga and being active, but lice can take over a house and it can take weeks to get rid of them. Does it really hurt for the three of you to go another day or to a different place?”

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She replied that she thinks it’s just being hyped up as a joke around campus, and that they wouldn’t have the gym open if it wasn’t cleaned.

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We started to go back and forth. I was asking why it was important to do yoga today, and why not just go any other time in the week. I reminded her that if she brought lice back to the house it could spread to everyone else, and that we can’t exactly fly across the country with lice on our heads.

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She argued that she wants to go today. That if there’s a warning on the door or anything then she won’t go and since they didn’t close the gym it can’t be that serious.

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At this point I’m starting to wonder why this is even an argument. How can I possibly be the bad guy for saying don’t go into a building that has a lice outbreak?

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Anyways, she says that I’m essentially calling her stupid, that, “obviously I’m not going to go there if there’s like a tent over it and warning signs.” She feels that I don’t trust her and must think she’s stupid if I think she’d risk infecting her family with lice just to go to yoga. She called me dramatic and said that I’m being controlling.

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Now the last thing I ever want to be in our relationship is controlling - she should never worry about me telling her where she can go or what she can do. But I think we should be able to disagree with each other’s decisions without being classified as “controlling.”

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I think with the information I was given I was not out of line to question her decisions.

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So reddit, please let me know if I’m a controlling asshole.

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TLDR: Girlfriend wants to go to a gym with an outbreak of lice to try yoga with her friends. We have big events planned for the next two weeks and told her it wasn’t a good idea. She called me controlling.