Throwaway because paranoia.

Okay, so basically here's some context. We're both 19 (I am female, he is male), complete 'nerds', go to university, live in the UK and are in the same uni game society (basically like a club). He originally introduced me to them because I'm too socially awkward to meet new people and he wanted to help me break my 'shell'. 

When I joined them, they pretty much instantly wanted us to tryout for teams and so we did. My friend is one of those that are in denial and think they're good at everything. He says he can play everything, which is a very cocky thing to say - I don't have the heart to tell him the truth and because he was pretty much my only friend and I didn't want to ruin things.

So we played together, everyone kept saying that there was a huge skill gap between us and they always made fun of him, etc etc. I didn't care, I just enjoyed playing with him except for when he started to get very toxic. He would rage a lot and blame everyone else, even me though I was always the one doing better than him. I finally got the courage to stop playing competitively with him and I had to make a ton of excuses.

So fastforward 2 ish weeks he deranked to the lowest rank while I was actually moving up quite quickly and he was in denial saying it's not his fault and that if we played together he would be able to do well and rank up. 

Before the official tryouts period started, they wanted to put me in one of the 3 teams, but I turned it down because he didn't make it into any of them. I felt like I would have betrayed him if I joined it because we were friends and he was the one who introduced me to them. So when he found out, he thanked me for this. 

He doesn't respond to criticism well and he likes to make other people feel bad about themselves if he is feeling pretty shitty too. So when he feels bad, he has to make me feel bad too. Everyone says he does have a 'thing' for me, although any girl that comes along he tries to get into their pants whether or not they have a boyfriend. He doesn't take hints very well either. I got over him pretty quickly because the girls he tried to get with before would tell me things like how he had been talking trash about me behind my back and how he is manipulative and so on. He would try to make me feel jealous on purpose and just overall make me feel uncomfortable and he kept trying to make me feel like I can't function without him - which isn't true. 

In the tryouts period a few weeks after, there were 2 stages. He didn't make it into the second stage but he didn't know this because he has his notifications off. I didn't want to tell him, I was hoping someone else would tell him... I knew he would get angry. 

So before the second stage, we all had a week to prepare for the next one. He still didn't know he wasn't in the next stage so he was practising and he kept asking me things like "do you really think I'm good?" and "what can I do to improve?" I couldn't answer the questions, but all I said was "I don't know, I only focus on what I'm doing not anyone else."

So when we all met up for our society during the second stage of tryouts, he was wondering why he wasn't being invited to the games... I couldn't tell him, I felt so bad about it and I just said "coach told me that we were scrimming (practising) and he had already made the teams. You can take my place after, I'll leave." 

So tryouts ended after that session and the teams were properly made. I was put into one of the three teams again and he wasn't - again. This time he saw the notification. So after, we all went out for drinks and he wouldn't talk to me the entire way up. I could tell he was angry so I asked him what was wrong and all he said was "good job making team c," then stormed off. He was angry at me for some reason so I thought okay and just moved on.

So we all went inside the bar (there were like 10-20 of us), except for him who just walked off and I met 2 of my friends there who live in the same halls of residence as I do. One of them was a girl who *really* didn't like him, but he had been trying to have sex with her for a few months. So she was showing me all the texts he sent her, he was telling her things that wasn't his place to tell and he had been talking bad about me to her. He even wanted to go so far as to meet up with her just to talk about me and he kept trying to ask her and call her (she already told him previously that she wasn't comfortable meeting with him alone).

Anyway, I digress. He came back in about 10 or 15 minutes later and signalled that he wanted to talk with me outside. Alone. So I went and he stood there and just looked at me and he yelled at me saying things like "you all seem to be doing fine without me so I won't go any more." and "I want you to apologise to me on behalf of the society."

I don't get it, why do I have to apologise for something that isn't my fault? Why do I have to apologise because he didn't want to take the criticism he was given and at least try to improve? I didn't apologise, I told him that if he had a problem with them then he should go and talk to them about it. So we stood there in some very awkward silence for a solid 5 minutes and he was just staring at me. I'm not good a conversation or eye contact at all so I was just starting at the ground. 

He kept saying "I told you how to make it better so do it," and he was saying that I should go and fix things and make things better because apparently I'm the only one that can. I told him to check his discord and a certain channel and he looked and saw that he didn't actually make it past the first stage of tryouts so he said "why didn't you tell me?" I probably should have told him, but I said to him that he should have checked his messages.

He also said, "There's 2 reasons why people apologise: 1 reason is that they did something wrong and another reason is because they're apologising for someone else." I know that's a bit bullshit, or at least to me it is. I don't think you should apologise because someone else did something wrong. Or at least it I don't think it applies to this situation. 

So after those really awkward 5 minutes of a mixture between silence and him yelling at me and me practically whispering back at him saying "it's not my fault, I'm not apologising because of something I didn't do," I  just yelled and said "I'm sorry that you're so pissed off at me for absolutely no reason" and just walked off back inside.

Was I in the wrong? Was it really my fault? Am I being the asshole because I don't know how to communicate with people? He refuses to talk to me now and we and 2 other people were supposed to be moving into a flat together in august/september. I have no idea what to do. 