*This is a throwaway account yada yada. If I’m declared an asshole I’ll be sure to apologize as soon as he gets home.*

Background:

My [23] boyfriend is notorious amongst our friend group to take party planning pretty seriously. He’s thrown at least 2-4 parties per friend costing around $300-$500 a piece. I’m the polar opposite, I enjoy having a small party, which consists of ordering food and weed for everyone to have a chill time. But since I knew my birthday was coming up I decided to not plan my own party and just let my boyfriend do his thing.

Incident:

I wake up on my birthday and my boyfriend doesn’t even remember to say happy birthday to me. Quite frankly I was hurt, since I expected anything birthday related from him and he normally goes above and beyond for all his friends. I said the normal good morning and went to my garden to water it. He opens the sliding door and yells “babe!” to which I turn to look, he says “I have to help *Lauren* fix her fridge, do you think you could help me with a couple of things?” I reply “sure” but I think he can tell I’m pretty bummed because he says “don’t worry, I’ll pick up Panda Express on the way home.”

I look at the list on the fridge and it’s an **assload** of stuff. Vacuum the floors, wash/put away the dishes, wipe down the dining tables and kitchen area and finally go drop off his aunts medicine to her. I was thinking that it would take at least 2-3 hours but I was fine with it because it was for our good mutual friend Lauren. 

After all the home related tasks were completed I hopped into my car and drove to his aunts house. Upon returning home, I hear a loud **”SURPRISE!”** and see my whole friend group and my boyfriend with tons of gifts and food. The party was pretty awesome, he even hired a local band I enjoy. I was happy, but also I was upset as hell that I did all of those chores essentially for my own party. I brought this up to him afterwards, to which he replied I had no respect for his time and consideration he put into my party and that those chores would have been needed to be done regardless. If it was up to me though, I’d rather spend my birthday chilling rather than doing chores for a big party.

Am I the asshole here?