Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : My friend frequently talks about being depressed and limiting her calorie intake drastically in order to lose weight. I also have depression and often joke about it, but mine is much less severe than hers. She started off with making jokes about being depressed and but it quickly escalated into long rants about how much she hates herself and how she lives off of about fifty calories and still feels obese. 

Finally, on a day where she constantly showed us eating disorder memes and making depression jokes, a couple of her other friends convinced me to tell a teacher with them. We were all worried about her, and the teacher agreed that she showed signs that were concerning to her as well. The teacher told the guidance counselor, who in turn told the friend’s parents.

The friend immediately texted me and began to accuse me of trying to ruin her life. She said that I had lied to the teacher and  was going about trying to help her in the wrong way. I responded that no, I hadn’t been lying and that it was the only way I knew how to help since I’m a young teenager and not a therapist. She says that she was only making those kinds of jokes because I did and she was just trying to fit in with me, but I have never once joked about having an eating disorder and the way she talks about these topics don’t feel like jokes. I eventually decided to stop arguing with her because she was most likely just deflecting her anger onto me.

Anyways, flash forward several months to now and she still constantly brings it up, saying that she has to watch her every word so she doesn’t get reported again and that she can no longer trust any of her friends. She doesn’t target any of the other friends who told the teacher and seems to focus only on me.  I’ve said countless times that we did it because we were concerned and not to hurt her but she doesn’t listen and assumes that we did it to ruin her life. 

I don’t feel like I can tell her that she’s making me feel uncomfortable because she would take it as a personal attack against her, I can’t tell the teacher that I’m concerned again because I don’t want a repeat of last time, and I can’t distance myself from her without worrying that she’ll relapse into “everyone hates me” territory.

I know that her mental health is bad and probably affects the way she’s acting towards me, but I still feel hurt every time she says that she doesn’t trust me or thinks that I hate her. Am I being an asshole here?