Context: I've been chronically unwell for a long long time. My friend comes to my house when I'm not well enough to go out. She used to invite me to go out with her but since she moved in with her boyfriend recently, she's just been coming to my house and going out with him and other people, until I asked her why she didn't want to hang out so much. I thought she was spending extra time with her partner and had, you know, forgotten her other friends still exist. She said no, it was cos she didn't want to invite me to things if I might be upset that I couldn't come if I wasn't well. I explained that I was upset cos she seemed to not want to hang out as much and could she please not decide for me what I was well enough to do or not, just invite me and let me decline, as she knows my health changes day to day. 

Anyway. This weekend I wasn't feeling well and I asked her if we could hang out, she said yes and came to my house. I wasn't sure how far I could go out, so we went to the beach right nearby.

After about an hour she was texting loads, then announced she was gonna go to the pub with her boyfriend and his friend - both of whom are my friends too - for st Patrick's day and she was gonna wear a green top I gave her. She said she was feeling bored on the beach.

She made no move to invite me to join them until I asked if I could come if I want to and she said yes I could come. I decided it would be too far for me to go in the end. We left so she could go join them. I felt a bit shit about not being able to go but way worse about apparently not being welcome. 

Then stupidly, I emailed her asking why she didn't invite me at first, and if it was cos of my health could she, again, not decide for me what I can do, and if it was cos she didn't want me to come then that's her choice. Then I felt like shit for asking her to justify her decision not to invite me cos she doesn't have to invite me or explain. 

But basically my best friend said that she was bored of me and was gonna hang out with our other friends instead, after an hour on the beach, when I was expecting an afternoon with her - looked like she was bored of me not just the beach. And I felt she was only there to help, not cos she wanted to see me - it's hard to be great company when you're not very well but I'm hardly a charity case.

She didn't reply to my question (I immediately wrote again to say sorry for asking and she doesn't have to answer). I think I've either lost a friend cos she doesn't like me anymore, or I've lost a friend cos I'm being stupid about whether she likes me or not.

Is she the asshole for excluding me from our mutual friends? Or am I the asshole for asking her not to?