Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : I'm just going to type this whole thing out as it happened, sorry if it gets long or convoluted. This happened about a year ago but for some reason I've been dwelling on it for the last week or so and I feel like revisiting it may help?

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Last year (almost to the day now that I think about it) I \[24f\] went out for drinks with Jeff \[25m\], one of my best friends. Our friend Annie \[22f\] also joined us. Annie and I used to flirt a lot whenever she was in town but she's been in a monogamous relationship forever so I was always careful never to cross a boundary of her relationship. Jeff and I were on-and-off for a few years but haven't been anything other than friends for a long time.

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We drank, I got very drunk off my three cocktails because I'm a lightweight, and while we were at the second bar Annie kissed me, which was surprising because of the whole boyfriend aspect but I was too drunk to think it through and we made out for a bit. Then she went to the bathroom and Jeff unexpectedly kissed me, which was more shocking because I thought we were completely passed being involved but I brushed it off as "we're all drunk, kissing is fun, it's not a big deal." It honestly didn't occur to me that he might still be attracted to me, and I feel really stupid now for brushing it off like that.

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Annie came back and I went to get a glass of water because I felt like I'd reached my drinking limit and when I came back they straight-up propositioned me for a threesome. I knew I wasn't interested but I think I got nervous so instead of being blunt I made up excuses...I think one of them was that I couldn't have sex because I had to go home and take out the trash. They said they didn't care and were willing to work around all the reasons I couldn't, I started to feel overwhelmed and told them I had to use the bathroom. I ran away and locked myself in the bar's bathroom for a minute to just think about what to do but I think around that time that last drink Annie had bought me was starting to hit...it's all a bit fuzzy here on out.

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I remember opening the door to the bathroom and both of them were right outside the door waiting for me. One of them put my coat over me and the other said they'd called an Uber to go back to my place. I remember Annie talking to me in the car on the way there and I could barely keep up with what she was saying but I don't think she realized how drunk I was. Somehow we got back to my apartment and I remember thinking I'd go along with it for now and maybe I'd get into it. So I let them undress me and we all got into my bed. Suddenly I heard a "polite" cough on the other side of the wall and realized my neighbor could hear everything we were doing. I got really embarrassed and tried to stop the threesome but Annie started kicking the wall and laughing while Jeff kept me from getting out of the bed, I remember trying to speak but not really being able to because of the alcohol so I don't think they realized that I was trying to end the evening.

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I won't go into too much detail but after that I figured if I made them cum they'd both leave. I still felt like I couldn't really move or participate and fell really bad about that, but I'm also really angry at Jeff for doing some things without asking first like trying to facefuck me without my permission. He did ask if I was okay with regular P in V sex and respected me when I said no. I think I was starting to sober up by then so I told them I just wanted to cuddle for a bit then they left.

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I saw Jeff a few days later and felt so \*angry\* at him for no reason, especially since he brought me flowers that day which is something he'd never done before. It was sweet but I just wanted to throw them out the window. I texted him later that I needed to process the evening that that I'd reach out when I was ready. He was so incredibly sweet and understanding and we haven't spoken since. Annie and I have had no contact since that evening, I feel weird and angry at her too but also guilty for feeling so angry.

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Basically I alienated and ended friendships two people because I kept giving mixed signals and couldn't get my shit together but I also feel like they should've noticed how drunk I was, especially since I'm a notorious lightweight. Am I being unfair? How do I apologize if I'm the asshole?