TLDR: momma drama, affects my brother’s coming home cuz I didn’t invite some close fam. 

My mom was a single parent for most of my childhood. She’s sweet, loving, honest and extremely loyal. 
She tends to get caught in the middle of the family fights. Every time something happens, people drag her into it. Since she wants everyone to get along, she always tries to mediate but gets shitted on for getting too involved. It’s caused a lot of incidents where miscommunications have led to her being cast out or shunned. Whoever was beefing would treat us(her kids) as if nothing was going on but wouldn’t invite her to birthday parties and family gatherings where they would eventually shit-talk her and whatnot. Mind you, I always thought we were pretty tight knit, but now i see my mom would always get the shit end of the stick but in these situations. She wouldn’t lash out or react to keep all us kids out of the drama.(Us 2nd gen kids are super close)
 It’s taken a toll on her and i feel so bad that she’s been taking that type of abuse for so long. She loves our family, but doesn’t acknowledge just how toxic they can be. 
She’s coming around and has decided enough is enough, and has started to cut some of that toxicity out of her life. My mom and i are super close so obviously I’m going to side with her. 
Now, one of my cousins (who is just a bit closer to my brother) was planning my brother’s coming home party with me. His mom is one of the people that my mom has decided to not have anything to do with anymore. I took it upon myself to let my cousin know of the situation. Didn’t give him all the deets of what went down with my mom and his but told him i did not want her there. He understands to some extent cuz he’s seen the mistreatments of my mom, but since i didn’t give all details of the situation involving his mom, I was scolded for “making this all about my mom and not about my brother that’s coming home.” I agree to an extent, but also don’t want to give my mom anymore shit to deal with now that she’s choosing to give herself a break from the BS. 
My cousin’s decided to not attend anymore and is pretty much telling me I’m picking sides instead of trying to keep things neutral for my brother’s sake. Idk, I feel bad cuz we’re all affected but I’m more concerned about my mom’s well being.