Precursor: I was raised by a catholic military father in the south. My boyfriend was raised in SoCal by free range parents. 
I have been taught my whole life to respect my elders, mind my manners, and to know what to say/do in front of whom.
So I get along easily with people, and things generally go ok for me because I have this blind respect for authority that is expected from a young adult. On top of that I’m very conscious of my audience and I try my best to adjust how I act and what I say so I don’t offend people or anything. I know it’s a little silly but it’s just how I was raised.
Now my boyfriend on the other hand, he treats everyone that he meets like they’re best friends. No blind respect, no boundaries, no filter, just equality. He doesn’t care who sees how he acts because he knows the people who matter know who he is and love him. But he keeps getting in trouble for his mouth, because he’s too comfortable in front of the wrong people. 
And I am trying to teach him that communication is everything, but he thinks I’m inhibiting who he is. That changing how he talks to certain people takes away a part of his identity, like he’s pretending to be someone he isn’t. 
I feel like an asshole because I don’t want to change him, or make him feel like he doesn’t belong. But I know if he keeps on like this then nobody will hire him, authorities will keep harassing him, and he won’t make friends.  Am I the Asshole? How do I not be the Asshole but help him grow? Should I just pull the stick out of my ass? 