Gareth:  While I was down there I could n't help noticing that the kitchen floor is in the most disgustingly filthy state that it is possible for the human brain to conceive . Amateur microbiologists amongst you will find much down there that will enthral and fascinate . Very likely species as yet unknown to science are breeding freely underfoot even as I speak . It is possible that I 'm kneeling all unbeknownst on a cure for the common cold , herpes and male pattern baldness all rolled into _ one _ . Put all such considerations out of your minds and clean this frigging floor !