Coach Howard Stebbins:  I do n't know if you 've heard , but we 're mighty proud of our football team here at Gro Vont High . How 'd you like to sign up ?
Sam Callahan: Well , I 'd like to , sir , but my mom needs me at home . She hasn't adjusted to the lack of humidity yet .
Coach Howard Stebbins: See , the thing is , it takes twenty - two players to hold a practice and I 've only got _ twenty _ - one , and half of them still suck their mama 's tit at night .
Sam Callahan: W - well , I no longer nurse , sir .