Comment: I have been divorced for 12 years. I initiated the divorce. We weren't a good fit and my ex-wife was more interested in my "resources" and what they afforded her to do than being a contributing partner in our relationship. The divorce cost me about $40,000 and I have paid a total of $432,000 in child and spousal support during this time as she has remarried TWICE. When I initiated the split she told me she would take me for everything and continues to do so to this day. In the mean time I focused on living in my tiny house and trying to be the best dad to my kids. Both have completely pulled away from me in their teens because I have insisted on them going to school and having responsibilities. Their mother has been entirely hands off. She parties, rides her horses while I struggle to convince my kids to improve attendance at school, avoid weed, and work hard. They won't listen. It's been hell. Why would I want to go through this again?. It's been financial devastation.