Comment: I'm so sorry this happened to you. Your story encapsulates what the Church gets wrong--how it ignores that sexual language is based on meaning and intent, and how those things are negotiated between two people. Good sex is never unilateral; rape can happen in marriage. The Church should be talking about rape, coercion, exploitation, and betrayal. Instead it fusses over where the organs go, what they do, and when they do it, things the earliest hominins figured out without their help.