input: TEXT: Originally written by Alexa Junge Transcribed by Josh Hodge. [Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is on the phone.] RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys. [a stranger enters with flowers] STRANGER: Hi. RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you? STRANGER: Yeah, I'm looking for Phoebe, does she still live here? RACHEL: Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her. STRANGER: Great. Uhh, just tell her her husband stopped by. [leaves flowers on bar] RACHEL: What? [in surprise she forgets she has the pigeon in the pot and lets it get away] STRANGER: Hey, how, how did you do that? OPENING TITLES [Scene: Monica and Rachels apartment. The whole gang is there.] JOEY: This is unbelievable Phoebs, how can you be married? PHOEBE: Well, I mean, I'm not married married
  SUMMARY:
output: The gang is amazed that Phoebe has been secretly married to a gay Canadian ice dancer named Duncan ( Steve Zahn ). She married him so he could obtain a green card. Phoebe is excited when he wants to see her, then is crushed that he wants a divorce. Duncan says he realized he is not gay and wants to marry someone else. Interesting facts are revealed about the others: Joey starred in a porn film and Chandler has a third nipple. Ross seeks relationship advice from Rachel after revealing that he and Julie have not slept together yet. Rachel, wanting to keep them apart, advises they abstain, while Joey gives Ross the opposite advice.