TEXT: [Open on Brian moaning, etc whilehaving s*x with a whole bunch of different guys. While wesee this, little squares with Michael, Justin, Emmett,Ted, Melanie and Lindsay all sporadically pop up on thescreen, Brady Bunch style, while they all talk on thephone to each other] Michael: Has anybody heard from Brian? I've been tryin'to reach him all day. Justin: Me, too. And he hasn't returned any of my calls. Lindsay: I hope he's all right. Emmett: I wonder how the condemned man's spending hisfinal hours. Ted: Doing penance? Melanie: Doing drugs. Michael: Doing as many guys as he can? All: Bingo! Lindsay: Maybe we shouldn't go through with this. He madeit clear he doesn't want to be reminded. Justin: We're not even supposed to mention it. Michael: It could get ugly. Really ugly. Ted: Still, it is an event of historic proportion. Like,the moon landing or the fall of communism. Melanie: It is our duty as friends to commemorate it... Emmett: And make sure he remembers it...always. (Lindsaychuckles) [Brianfinishes and falls to the bed. When he comes to, thewhole gang is there] Michael: Briiiiii-an! Justin: Hello in there! Lindsay: Wake up sleepy head. Brian: What are you...doing here? Melanie: (gasp) You mean you haven't heard? Emmett: It's the last day of the rest of your life. Brian: Did I die? Ted: No. But you'll wish you had. You're thirty. [All of them start laughing evily. Justin crawls on topof his naked body] Brian: Go away! Justin: Sorry, grandpa. Brian: (pushing Justin off) I said, go away! Justin: No such luck. Brian: Oh. (Brian tries to roll away but everyone goesafter him, trying to get him) Emmett: Grab him! Michael: Careful, he bites. Melanie: (throwing clothes to Lindsay)
SUMMARY:
Brian turns 30; Michael and David prepare for their move to Portland; Ted faces the truth about Blake; Justin and Daphne attend their prom where unexpected events take place.