TEXT: Act One. Scene One - Frasier's BMW Frasier and Martin are driving around Seattle. They are heading towards the Montana to pick Niles up for a night out. Martin: You know where we should go tonight? Frannie's Fish & Chips! Frasier: Dad, we're taking Niles out to boost his spirits, not his cholesterol! Martin: Oh please, that French food that you guys eat is full of butter and cheese. Frasier: Yes, but at least it's not made by a woman working a deep fryer in a batter-dipped brassiere. They stop at a light. A red hatchback pulls up alongside them. Niles is the driver. Martin notices him. Martin: Hey, isn't that Niles? Frasier: Where? Martin: Driving that old hatchback. Frasier: Nah, Niles would never be seen in anything called a hatchback. But it does look a lot like him. Frasier honks his horn. Niles looks, sees them - and drives off at full speed. Frasier: Oh my God, he's running away! Martin: Well, catch him, Mr. 12-cylinder German engineering! Frasier and Martin chase Niles across Seattle. On his car phone, Frasier dials in Niles's cell phone number. Ahead of them, Niles answers: Niles: Hello? Frasier: Niles, what the hell are you doing? Niles: Well, I'm just pulling into my parking garage. You on your way? Behind him, Frasier and Martin gape at each other. Frasier: What are you talking about?! You're driving up 2nd Avenue! Martin: You're in that little red thing. Niles: No I'm not, you must be mistaking me for someone else. See you when you get here. [hangs up] Frasier and Martin cannot believe his lies. Martin: He's getting away. He just took a right at the corner. Frasier takes a right and rings Niles again. Niles: Hello? Frasier: Niles! What are you running away from us for? I can see that it's you! Ni
SUMMARY:
Niles has been forced by his ongoing divorce from Maris to buy a cheaper car, as his Mercedes has been repossessed. He realises that his apartment is too expensive, and moves out. He finds a new apartment at the Shangri-La , a cheap bachelor 's apartment complex that falls well below his high standards.