TEXT: Dwight: Today is the test launch day for the inaugural Sabre store. Brr brr brr BRR [imitating trumpet] and I, Dwight Schrute, am in charge of the entire operation. If I can prove myself today and the store is a hit with the media and Nellie sees this, the vice presidency is mine. Ryan: Are you holding this chair? Dwight: Yes. Ryan: 'cause I feel like I'm gonna fall off. Dwight: Yes. Yes. Ryan: I'm not wearing the right shoes for this. Dwight: We went over this, ok? Your tiny fingers make the best knots. Erin: Hey Strangers. So stoked for the Sabre store opening. [SCENE_BREAK] Erin: Hey, my name's Tabitha. I'm camped out in front of the Sabre store so I can be first in line for the new Pyramid. Psst. It's me Erin. Dwight had me pretend to be a hipster to create hype, and it's working. There's already people camped out behind me. [SCENE_BREAK] Nellie: Test launch day, people. Now, I would like to fill you in on a little secret about me to inspire you today. Now, I know you probably all think I'm this patrician goddess. But here's the truth. I was born in the little working class town of Basildon, and until the age of 32, [cockney accent] I talked like this, which was bloody horrendous, innit? I came from dirt, no lower than... what's lower than dirt? Dwight: Loam, magma, mantle, outer core, inner core. Nellie: Yeah, thank you. Loam. Bloody loam, I came from. I hit rock bottom when I auditioned for the Spice Girls. I didn't even get a callback. Jim: Which Spice Girl? Nellie: The black one. I never stood a chance. Jim: Okay. Nellie: Now, think about my journey here today, and let it inspire your journey. Dwight: Okay.
SUMMARY:
At the Sabre store opening, Dwight attempts to put on a theatrical presentation to impress Nellie. After a shaky start, an impromptu speech-originally supposed to be delivered by Ryan Howard ( B. J. Novak )-given by Jim impresses the critical crowd. Andy is embarrassed after receiving a black eye, courtesy of a little girl.