TEXT: Written by Scott Silveri & Shana Goldberg-Meehan Transcribed by Darcy and Julie Partridge [Scene: Central Perk, Ross and a beautiful blonde (Cheryl) are standing outside. The rest of the gang is watching from inside.] Cheryl: So, thank you for the delicious dinner. Ross: You're welcome for a delicious dinner. [inside] Phoebe: Hey what are you guys looking at? Chandler: Ross and the most beautiful girl in the world. Phoebe: Yeah, come to papa. [Cheryl walks away and Ross walks inside. Everyone stares at him in disbelief.] Ross: I know! Monica: Probably the only time I'll ever say this, but did you see the ass on her? Chandler: Where did you, when did you, how did you... (Joey hits the back of Chandler's head) How did you get a girl like that? Rachel: Yeah, so what is she, like a... like a spokesmodel, or an aerobics instructor, what? Ross: Actually she's a paleontology doctoral candidate, specializing in the centazoic era. Chandler: Okay, but that's, like, the easiest era. Ross: I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made her dinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow. Rachel: Well maybe she and her friends are just having a contest to see who can bring home the biggest geek. Ross: Fine by me; hope she wins. OPENING CREDITS [Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.] Chandler: Hi. You guys have any wrapping paper? Phoebe: Oo! Is it for my birthday present? Chandler: Phebes, it was your birthday, like, months ago. Phoebe: Yeah, but remember you said you ordered something special, and it just hasn't come yet? Chandler: Well, I have a call in about that. Phoebe: 'Kay. Chandler
SUMMARY:
Phoebe helps Monica cater a funeral, but the merry widow intimidates Monica to avoid paying them; Phoebe takes charge, demanding the widow settle the account, prompting the girls to start their own catering business. Chandler reluctantly helps Joey find Kathy a birthday present better than the one he bought for her, ultimately sacrificing his gift to substitute for Joey's tacky one. Ross, revolted by his beautiful new girlfriend's filthy apartment, finally calls it quits. Rachel is determined to complete a crossword without help. Kathy later thanks Chandler for the book, realizing he bought it.