TEXT: Scene: Bernadette's bedroom. Howard: What's so funny? Bernadette: Nothing. Just thinking about the noises people make during s*x. Howard: I do sometimes get a bit carried away, don't I? Bernadette: It's cute. You sound a little like a drunken monkey. Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh! Howard: You know it's meant as a compliment. Bernadette: That's how I take it. Howard: This is perfect. I hope this moment never ends. Bernadette: Me too. Howard: Well, gotta go. Bernadette: Oh! Already? Why don't you stay over? Howard: Well, I'd love to, but you know my mother needs me in the morning. Bernadette: Please, I think the woman can manage to put a wig on by herself. Howard: It's not just the wig. It's pinning her hair up, drawing on her eyebrows. It's a two-person job. Bernadette: It's just, when you leave right after we make love, it makes me feel cheap. Howard: Oh, honey, I'm sorry. What can I do? Bernadette: Stay. Howard: Okay. Like, what, another five, ten minutes? Bernadette: Go home. Howard: Your call. Bernadette: Howard, have you ever considered us living together? Howard: Boy, I don't know. You, me, Ma living under the same roof? Bernadette: No, I mean just you and me. You can move in here, or we can find a place. Howard: I've got a better solution. Bernadette: What? Howard: We wait for my mom's heart to explode from all the salt she eats. Then we just stick her in the ground, flip her mattress and move into the big bedroom. Bernadette: Great. Howard: Look at us planning a future together. Scene: Outside Howard's house. Mrs Wolowitz (voice): Who's there? Are you a s*x criminal? Howard: s*x
SUMMARY:
Priya returns and resumes dating Leonard, despite Raj's protests. Amy gets Penny to admit that she is extremely jealous of Priya, giving her the chance to measure the brainwaves associated with jealousy. Meanwhile, Bernadette insists that Howard leave his mother and move in with her. He eventually does so, but tells her a sad story about how much his mother depends on him. She then agrees that he can move back.