TEXT: [Act One] [Scene One - Café Nervosa. Niles and Frasier are sitting at a table as a waiter arrives] Waiter: Hey, how're you doing, doc? The usual? Frasier: Please. Niles: I'll have my usual, too. Waiter: And that would be...? Niles: Ah! I come here every day. You must remember... my usual is... a half-caf... cappuccino... with a light dusting of... Waiter: Nutmeg. Niles: Cinnamon! [the waiter leaves] God, that's infuriating! Frasier: Oh, Niles. Niles: I come in here every bit as often as you do. Frasier: Don't take it to heart, Niles. This person just happened to remember me best, the next person might just as easily... [A woman notices Frasier] Woman: Oh my God, you're Frasier Crane. Could I bother you for an autograph? Frasier: No, you can't. [then:] It's never a bother. [laughs] Woman: [as he's signing] I love your show. Frasier: Oh, thank you. Woman: I just think you're like the smartest guy on the face of the earth. Frasier: Well, one does hear tales of a certain wise man in Tibet, but why split hairs? There you go. Woman: Thanks. [The woman leaves] Frasier: [laughs] Where was I? Niles: You were last seen hiking up Mount Ego! [Martin and Daphne enter arguing] Martin: Shut up already! You've been yakking about this all morning. Daphne: Well, it's a stupid rule and it's always we foreigners that suffer for it. Frasier: Began driving on the wrong side of the road today, did we? Daphne: No! It's about my friend, Xena... oh, you don't want to hear about it. [Behind her, Martin signals to them not to ask] Niles:
SUMMARY:
Frasier's one thousandth radio broadcast is soon to take place. He initially claims that he does not want a large celebration, but cannot sustain his false modesty and seeks a celebration to mark the occasion. Frasier Crane Day is then proclaimed in Seattle , and a large public rally is organized for the broadcast, to take place at the Space Needle with the mayor in attendance. On the day, Frasier decides to take a leisurely stroll with Niles over to the rally. They leave in plenty of time but a series of disastrous events impedes his progress, and Roz is compelled to start the broadcast without him. Frasier finally manages to arrive at his rally thanks to a chauffeur who escorted him for free. In exchange, Frasier decides not to go to the rally and instead befriends the chauffeur, John, by listening to him confide about his familial situation for free.