TEXT: Gossip Girl : According To The Catholic Church, Mortal Sin Can Only Be Absolved Through The Sacred Act Of Confession, But It Looks Like A Certain W.A.S.P. Princess Has Recently Found Herself Desperately In Need Of A Little Unburdening. And Who Is The Man Upstairs To Discriminate? [IN THE CHURCH] Blair : Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned. It's Been... A While Since My Last Confession. For Exactly 20 Minutes, I... Succumbed To Inebriation, The Priest : What Troubles You, My Child? Blair : After Being Broken Up With My Boyfriend For Exactly 20 Minutes, I... Succumbed To Inebriation, Performed At A Speakeasy And Surrendered My Virtue To A Self-Absorbed Ass. The Only Good News Is That He's A Total Pig Who Will Act Like It Never Happened. Thank God. Ahem. The Priest : Hum Hum. Blair : Sorry. Truthfully, I'm Not Even Catholic. The Priest : You Don't Say. Blair : But Losing My Virginity To Chuck Bass? None Of My Friends Will Ever Understand. I'm Ready For My Punishment. Whatever You And God Think Is Fair- Flogging, Fasting, Putting That Thing With The Teeth Around My Thigh, Like Silas. The Priest : How About Some Food For Thought Instead? Don't Drink. Keep Your Clothes On. Try Avoiding Those Who Might Cause You To Stray. Blair : Oh, I Plan To. Thank You, Father. It Was Very Good Advice. You Don't Grant Birthday Wishes, Do You? The Priest : I'm A Priest, Not A Genie. Blair : Well, The Next Time You Talk To Him, Would You Ask Him To Send My Boyfriend Back To Me? [RESTAURANT] Serena : Mm. I Gotta Say... Dan : No Need To Say Anything. Waitress : God, I Hate People In Love. Vanessa : Wow! Awkward. Dan :
SUMMARY:
Devastated by the current state of her relationship with Nate and still dealing with the guilt from her recent indiscretion, Blair puts on a happy face for her 17th birthday party and attempts to hide the truth from her friends. Hoping to ease the tension between Serena and Vanessa, Dan takes Vanessa to Blair's party so the girls can have some bonding time, but this only ends up making Serena more uncomfortable. Jenny brings her mother (Susan Misner) home for a surprise visit, but Rufus may not be ready to forgive and forget. Nate's parents (Sam Robards and Francie Swift) ask him to make a huge sacrifice in an effort to salvage his father's business as he faces charges of embezzlement and fraud.