TEXT: Dwight: [bouncing on an exercise ball] You should get one of these. Jim: No. Thank you. Dwight: Do you even know what this is? It is a fitness orb and it has completely changed my life. Forget everything you thought you knew about ab workouts. Jim: Done. Dwight: This ab workout is specifically designed to strengthen your core. [knocks things around Jim's desk] Sorry. Jim: S'ok. Dwight: Numerous health benefits, strengthens your back, better performance in sports, more enjoyable s*x. Jim: You're not having s*x. Dwight: Plus, improves your reflexes [knocks over more stuff] see, I would have caught that. Jim: Ok, you know what, uh, how much is that? Dwight: It's only twenty-five bucks. Jim: Wow. Um, ok. [pops Dwight's orb with scissors] [SCENE_BREAK] Michael: Pam, could I see you in my office? [SCENE_BREAK] Pam: It's performance review day, company-wide. Last year, my performance review started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were, and it ended with him telling me he could bench-press 190 pounds. So, I don't really know what to expect. [SCENE_BREAK] Michael: Pam, you're trustworthy- Pam: Thank you. Michael: And a woman- Pam: Oh, no. Michael: And I want you to listen to a voicemail from my boss. [Jan on recording] "Michael, it's Jan. I guess I missed you. I'll, uh, be there this afternoon for performance reviews. I hope it's understood that that will be our only topic of discussion. See you soon." First impressions? Pam: Uh, just off the top... I think she'll be here this afternoon. [SCENE_BREAK] Michael: My boss is coming in today, the lovely Jan Levinson-Gould will, well, no Gould. The Gould has been [makes slashing neck hand motion] swack, divorce
SUMMARY:
Michael conferences with the employees during their annual performance reviews, while he worries about his own upcoming performance review with Jan. He takes tips from the suggestion box on ways to better himself, but the attempt ends in disaster when Jan discovers that Michael has told his employees about their romantic encounter.