TEXT: ACT ONE Scene One - Int. Cafe Nervosa Frasier is in a long line behind Bulldog to get coffee. Bulldog is reading the paper. Frasier: What's going on, anyway? [glances at watch] My God, I've got an appointment in twenty minutes. Bulldog: Ah, some weenie made a big stink so they've gotta clean the milk steamer every time they use it. Frasier: Oh. Bulldog: [turning back] Is was you, wasn't it? Frasier: [haughtily] Well, if requesting basic sanitary procedures makes me a weenie, then a weenie be I. Roz enters with a dress bag in her arms. Roz: Hi, guys. Frasier/Bulldog: Hey, Roz. Roz: [glances at line] Oh, God, Frasier, what stupid suggestion did you make this time? Frasier: Nice to see you, too, Roz. Roz: Sorry. I just spent two hours trying on jumbo formal wear for the SeaBea awards. Roz holds up a garish, sequin-covered silver dress with a monstrous silver bow on the back. Roz: [smirk] The best part was when the size two sales girl said I could use this again after my pregnancy. Frasier: Well, perhaps you could... [gestures] cut off the bow, remove the sleeves, and, uh... Bulldog: Stick a pole in it and go camping. Roz: You know, if I'm gonna stick a pole some place.... Frasier: Children! Bulldog: [reaching the counter] Coffee to go. Black. Frasier: I, for one, am looking forward to the SeaBeas. Bulldog: Why? You're not gonna win. They never give it to the emcee! Now me? I'm a lock. Frasier: Well, you're awfully cocky. Bulldog: Hey, if knowing I'm the best thing on the air makes me cocky, then cocky be I. Frasier: Ah.
SUMMARY:
While waiting in a long line at Café Nervosa , Frasier spots a man who has a gun. In the chaos that follows, it appears that Bulldog acts heroically when he pulls Roz out of the way and causes the gunman to flee. The other patrons of the café proclaim him a hero, and the story appears later on the news. Frasier, however, saw that rather than bravely pushing Roz out of the way, Bulldog attempted to use her as a human shield, defusing the robbery attempt entirely by accident. Frasier tells Bulldog to own up to the deception, but Bulldog refuses, and learns (on-air) that he will receive a special Man of the Year award for his actions. At the award ceremony, Martin shouts that he sees a man with a gun. Bulldog uses his own mother as a human shield in his panic, revealing his dishonesty.