TEXT: [The opening shot is an aerial view of the Liberty Ride. Michael and Ben take time out to call the other "happily married" couple back in Pittsburgh and tell them the good news.] Mel: Married? Lindsay: Married? Omigod! Michael: We did it in Toronto, where it's actually legal. Ben: We wish you'd been there with us. Lindsay: Us too. When you get back I'm gonna cry anyway. Ben: When you get back, we're gonna all go out and celebrate. Michael: The two married couples. Call us if the baby crosses the finish line before we do. Mel: Oy vey. Stop with the worrying! Lindsay: See you in a few days. And congratulations! Michael: Bye. Ben: Bye. [They hang up.] Lindsay: Married. Legally! Mel: At least in Canada. Lindsay: Someday here. Mel: That's when gay people find out, be careful what you wish for. It might come true. Lindsay: That's for sure! What makes them think they'll be any better at it than those long-suffering straight people. Mel: The only people who'll profit from it are divorce lawyers. I'll have a whole new clientele to bill. Lindsay: I guess that's one good thing about not being allowed to marry. Mel: Not having to get a divorce? [At the border, the newlyweds encounter a Gratuitously Homophobic Customs Agent wittily named Butz. He eyes Ben and Michael's papers suspiciously.] Butz: Next! How long were you in Canada? Ben: Two days. Butz: Purpose of visit? Michael: We're doing a bicycle ride for charity. Butz: (looking at form) Both your names are on this. Ben: It says spouses can use the same form. Michael: While we were in Canada, we took advantage of the fact that same-sex marriages are legal. Ben: So we tied the knot. Hunter: They're husband and husband. Butz: Who's he? Ben & Michael (in unison): Our son. Butz: This may be legal in Canada, but the United States of America
SUMMARY:
Michael and Ben have trouble crossing into the United States as a married couple. Ted and Emmett get lost in the woods on the way to a 12-step meeting, while Brian takes a nasty fall and breaks his collarbone. Melanie goes into labor. 'Rage' is given the green light.