TEXT: [The Dungeon. On a computermonitor, Emmett jerks off violently.] Ted: 950, 975, 980, 985, 990, 995, 997, 998, 1000. [He comes.] Ted: 1003! Yes sir! Over one thousand self-satisfiedcustomers! And we're out. [As Emmett wipes himself off and puts on a robe, Tedbrings over a bottle of water and straightens the bed.] Ted: OK, you will take ten then you start round three. Emmett: I don't know if I can do. Honey, my dick's downfor the count! Ted: Listen now, you've got a lot of fans out there whowanna see you for the record. Emmett: The record? Ted: Set by the legendary Peter Pounder. He once came sixtimes in forty-five minutes. Emmett: Six times in forty-five minutes? I've been ableto do it since I was eighteen. Ted: Well, don't you worry you're pretty little dickabout it. Twice in thirty minutes is very...respectable. Emmett: Respectable? Rev up the webcam, boys! We're goingfor the gold. Ted: What a boy champ! And we're on. [The comic-book store. Debbie'sbrought lunch.] Deb: I made you sausage and peppers. And I don't hear agoddamn word about it! Michael: You're kidding me? If it wasn't for you, I'dprobably starve to death. Deb: As a mother of a future captain of industry, Icouldn't very well let that happen. Michael: There just a problem, Mom. I'm not exactly gonnabecome a Millionere for selling comics. Deb: Everybody has to start somewhere, sweetheart. Andyou've started. That's what important. I'm so proud ofyou, Michael. You've turn out to be quit a man. Sureyou're food. [Ben comes in.] Michael: Hey
SUMMARY:
Michael decides to continue dating HIV positive Ben, despite the objections of Brian, Ted, Emmett, and his mother, Debbie. Lindsay and Melanie struggle to get money for their wedding from Lindsay's parents. Success on Ted's porno website is swelling Emmett's... ego.