TEXT: ACT ONE Scene One - Café Nervosa - Morning Frasier is seated at a table. Martin comes in, extremely full of himself. Martin: Large coffee to go, please. [with heavy innuendo] Black. [sits with Frasier] Whew, didn't get much sleep last night at Ronee's. Don't ask why, 'cause there are certain things a gentlemen doesn't tell. Frasier: [hoping he'll shut up] Ah. Martin crosses his arms with a smug, expectant grin on his face. Frasier refuses to take the hint. Martin lets out a naughty chuckle. Frasier: Dad, please? Martin: Well, all right, I'll tell you just a little. She's got this massage oil- Frasier: Would you stop it! I do not want to hear about your dirty weekend - especially since the most erotic experience I've had in six months was last week's trouser fitting. Niles enters with a GAP shopping bag. He seems taken aback to see Frasier and Martin there. Frasier: Oh, Niles. Martin: Hi, Niles. Niles: Hi. Frasier: The GAP, Niles? I didn't know you shopped there. Niles: I just discovered it. Apparently there are a number of them. He sits down. Frasier: [suspicious] And what did you get there? Niles: Oh, uh, well, let's see... some wine glasses, and a bud vase- Frasier: That's Pottery Barn, you jackass! Give me that! Frasier snatches the shopping bag and pulls out a white cashmere sweater. Frasier: Just as I thought. You bought the Diego sweater. Martin: Well, what's the big deal? It's just a sweater. Frasier: It is not "just a sweater," it is a work of art by Spain's fabled master weaver Diego - who uses only the soft chin hair
SUMMARY:
Roz is disappointed when she is unable to get Alice tickets to a concert by children's performer Nanette Guzman a.k.a. Nanny G (played by Laurie Metcalf ). After his family reveals that he used to be married to her, Frasier agrees to help Roz secure tickets. He accompanies Roz and Alice to a bookstore appearance, and continually drops hints to Nanny G about the fact that he is single. She doesn't seem interested. However, she soon has everyone in the store cover their eyes as part of a song. She gooses Frasier and kisses him passionately. They plan a rendezvous at his apartment. Much to his surprise, Nanny G shows up with her producer, Donald ( Don McManus ), who is also her husband. She claims that the marriage is only a business arrangement, and laments how frustrated she is with her life. She makes several passes at Frasier, and asks him to meet up with her after her concert the next day. Although he is in the midst of a dry spell and desperately wants to go through with it, he realizes it is wrong. He stops by before the show to share his decision, and Nanny G asks him to go down to the prop room to talk. She seduces Frasier, and he takes off his clothes and jumps into the prop bed with her, only to have it rise to the stage as the show begins. Meanwhile, Niles buys an expensive sweater, breaking a promise to Daphne to be frugal and save money for their child's college fund. Daphne, who believes the sweater is from Gap , quickly proceeds to ruin it, leaving Niles frustrated but with no recourse.