TEXT: Originally written by Michael Curtis and Greg Malins Trascribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Eric Aasen CHANDLER: Hey. MONICA: So how was Joan? CHANDLER: I broke up with her. CHANDLER: They were huge. When she sneezed, bats flew out of them. RACHEL: Come on, they were not that huge. CHANDLER: I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain. MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things? JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts. CHANDLER: You or me? ROSS: I got it. Uh, Joey, women don't have Adam's apples. JOEY: You guys are messin' with me, right? ALL: Yeah. JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa." PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason. CHANDLER: Maureen Rosilla. ROSS: Not hating Yanni is not a real reason. (knock) MONICA: Hello, Mr. Heckles. MR. HECKLES: You're doing it again. MONICA: We're not doing anything. MR. HECKLES: You're stomping. It's disturbing my birds. RACHEL: You don't have birds. MR. HECKLES: I could have birds. MONICA: Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down. MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party. RACHEL: All right, bye-bye. CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about
SUMMARY:
When Chandler refuses to date a woman from work, claiming her nostrils are too big, the gang claim this is always his way to avoid serious relationships. Rachel and Monica's downstairs neighbour, Mr. Heckles, suddenly dies, leaving them all his belongings, which is nothing but junk that they have to dispose of. Ross and Phoebe argue over the theory of evolution. Chandler, noticing similarities between his life and Mr. Heckles', believes he will also die alone. Panicked, he calls Janice and arranges to meet her, only to be shocked when she shows up married and pregnant.