TEXT: Act 1 Scene 1 - Frasier's Apartment DINNER AT THE CRANES' ALREADY IN PROGRESS [Fade in. Frasier is standing with a woman. Niles is putting out a small fire back by the bookcase. Guests are leaving and the woman slaps Frasier.] Frasier: Mimsy, wait! Please, I can explain! Mimsy: Oh, don't bother! And I bet you don't even have Tourette's Syndrome! [She leaves.] Frasier: Poop! Hell, damn! Oh... [She throws a bouquet at him. He closes the door and tosses the flowers on the table. A chef comes up to him and hands him two lobsters.] Etienne: Lose my number! [He storms out.] Frasier: Chef Etienne! Oh, dear God. Niles: I hope you're happy. Frasier: Me?! You're the one who suggested that flaming kabobs might lend a festive air. [Niles picks up the hairpiece he's been stamping out.] Niles: I didn't know Ben Corbett's toupee would go up like that. [He tosses it in the punch bowl and goes to sit on the couch.] Daphne: [rising] Oh, quiet. Both of you. It's done. [She heads for the kitchen as Martin comes in from the bedrooms wearing a sash.] Martin: Bongiarno! Niles: Party's over, Dad. Martin: What, you mean I'm not the Count anymore? Niles: 'Fraid not. [Frasier sits down with Niles.] Frasier: Why is it that we can't seem to pull off a simple dinner party? Martin: Because you always go overboard. Frasier: Yes, but this one was bare bones. Simplicity itself. [Daphne comes back in.] Daphne: One of your goats just threw up in the kitchen. Frasier: Ohh.... [He gets up and heads for the kitchen where a goat
SUMMARY:
The Crane brothers have a history of holding disastrous dinner parties, and the episode opens with one such occasion, just as all the guests and caterers are walking out. Niles is donating a painting by artist Mike Shaw to a museum, and plans to hold a farewell dinner party for it, with some fellow art collectors in attendance. When Daphne learns of this, she persuades him to co-host the party with her, not his brother. Frasier is upset, but offers his services in case they are needed. Consequently, when Daphne's cooking starts to go wrong at the last minute, and the painting suffers after an encounter with Alice and her crayons , Frasier agrees to help, as long as Niles is unaware of his presence. The situation becomes more complicated by the minute as the guests arrive, particularly when the artist turns up unexpectedly (and Martin is misidentified as him) and Daphne's mother takes a shine to him.