TEXT: 3.17 - A Tale of Poes and Fire OPEN IN LUKE'S DINER [Lorelai and Rory are sitting at a table with papers and books spread out in front of them.] LORELAI: Okay, let's see. Looks like Harvard definitely has the smallest class sizes. RORY: Okay, we've got our first entry here. It's a pro for Harvard. LORELAI: Oh, whoa, whoa, those are not the final official pro/con lists. RORY: Why? What's wrong with them? LORELAI: Well, the lines are crooked, the printing's all sloppy. Harvard, Princeton and Yale cannot see them looking like that. RORY: They're not going to see our pro/con lists. LORELAI: What if they subpoena them? RORY: Then I'll roll them up in a ball and eat them. LORELAI: Oh, a big pro for Yale <unk> they have 1100 members of the maintenance staff. Clean, clean, clean. RORY: All three of these places probably have the same number. LORELAI: But Yale must be crowing about it for some reason. Princeton might only have two. RORY: Two? LORELAI: Yeah. RORY: You think there're a total of two guys cleaning all of Princeton? LORELAI: Write "Princeton's stinking filthy" in big letters. RORY: Yeah, I'm pretending to write it as we speak. [Kirk walks over carrying a box of T-shirts] KIRK: Good morning, ladies. May I interest you in a shirt? LORELAI: Oh, Kirk. You're not selling your laundry again, are ya? KIRK: No, these are part of my latest money-making endeavor. I'm going to print daily T-shirts featuring a humorous topical headline of something I witness around town. RORY: Neat. KIRK: I got the idea when I read about something a man was doing in Portland. LORELAI: What was he doing? KIRK: He was printing
SUMMARY:
A fire at the Independence Inn forces Lorelai to relocate its guests to her own house and those of her friends, and leaves her spending the night at Luke's, where she reveals her dream of being married to him and pregnant with their twins; Sookie invades Luke's with staff in tow to prepare breakfast for the Inn's guests, and gets into a culinary groove with Luke after a rocky start; questions arise about Jess' attendance at school when he receives the Employee of the Month award from Wal-Mart and Luke discovers that he's working there more than full time; Lorelai and Rory start picking up on weird and somewhat unfriendly vibes coming from Nicole and Lindsay; Rory visits Paris, who's missed five days of school to take to her bed and hide from the world, and prompts her to stop watching soaps, call Jamie, tell her parents about Harvard, get a life plan, and rejoin the land of the living; after making extensive pro-con lists in an effort to decide whether to attend Harvard, Yale, or Princeton, Rory has a heart-to-heart with Lorelai and chooses Yale.