TEXT: Act One. Scene One - Department Store. Roz and Frasier are walking through the store. Frasier is carrying a bag with a Menorah in it for Frederick. Roz: I thought your father was in charge of Christmas decorations. Frasier: Oh, no, no, not this year. We're doing it my way. That's why I'm ordering a tasteful tree here. They'll even deliver it on Christmas Eve, fully decorated. Roz: [sarcastic] Gee, that'll be fun for Freddie. Frasier: Oh no, Frederick won't be joining me this year. He's spending his vacation on an archaeological tour with Lilith. Roz: He's spending Christmas with dried-up old bones? Frasier: [laughs] I thought I told you, she's taking him on an archaeological tour. [laughs with Roz] Oh good lord, look how late it's gotten! Roz: Well, don't blame me, you're the one who spent twenty minutes looking for that candleholder thing. Frasier: Oh, no, no, it's a Menorah, Roz. I thought I'd get one for Frederick for Hanukah. Roz: Oh, that's right, I completely forgot Frederick is half-Jewish. Frasier: Yes, between the Crane boy genes and Lilith's contribution, I'm not sure the NFL is holding its breath. Roz: I need to go over to "Notions" and try to find something for Calvin, the security guard. Frasier: Oh, what are you getting him? Roz: If I knew I wouldn't be going to "Notions." Roz leaves to the "Notions" part of the store. Frasier goes to the clothes department and asks the assistant (Sal): Frasier: Excuse me, I'd like to get a gift for that woman I was with. Er, how about this sweater right here? Sal: Excellent choice. Frasier: I'm not sure of the size, though, could you find me this in a medium? Thank you. Sal ducks under the counter for the sweater. Roz
SUMMARY:
Christmas is approaching, and while out shopping with Roz and looking for a menorah for his son, Frasier makes a covert attempt to purchase a sweater for Roz. Just before she realises, another woman steps in and rescues Frasier by pretending that she is buying it. She recognises him from the radio, and when he offers his thanks and asks if he can return the kindness, she suggests a date with her daughter, Faye. When it transpires that Faye and Helen thought Frasier was Jewish, he must maintain the pretense to avoid offending Helen.