TEXT: ACT ONE Scene One - Frasier's Apartment. [SCENE_BREAK] Frasier and Martin are coming in the front door. Martin: Ah, I still say when some guy grabs your parking space, you don't just sit there, you say something. Frasier: Dad, when a man has no front teeth and stitches on his nose, I think it's safe to assume he's sensitive to criticism. Martin: [picking up a box] What's this? Frasier: Oh, must be one of those inspirational tapes that Daphne's always listening to. [Daphne comes in from her room.] Oh, my God, "Here, Have a Rainbow," by Dr. Honey Snow. Daphne, how can you listen to this stuff? It's absolute drivel. Daphne: Well, for someone who writes drivel, she's awfully popular. Frasier: Oh, really, fancy that. She tells everyone that they're perfectly wonderful and that nothing wrong is ever their fault. What do you know, they like it. Daphne: There's a lot more to it than that. You should try reading one of her books. The doorbell rings, Frasier goes to get it. Frasier: Yes, well I have. Believe me, after one page, I was yearning for the worldly cynicism of Barney the Dinosaur. He opens the door to reveal Niles. Frasier: Hello, Niles, to what do we owe this pleasure? Niles: Brace yourselves kids, it's raffle time! Frasier: Oh, God. Martin: Not again. Niles: 'Fraid so. [notices tape] Oh ye gods, who's been plumbing the shallows of Dr. Honey Snow? Daphne: I have. Niles: Insightful, isn't she? [Daphne is not amused.] Anyway, tickets are only ten dollars, it all goes to support Maris's little opera group. Frasier: Dear God, what is the grand prize this year? Niles: Their lead soprano, Mrs. Fit
SUMMARY:
Frasier pretends to be a fan of several insubstantial self-help books in order to pursue a romance with the author ( Shannon Tweed ). Meanwhile, Niles attempts to cover up the losses when he helps Daphne invest some money.