TEXT: Scene: The apartment. Sheldon: Boy, do I have to urinate. Leonard: If only there were a solution to that. Sheldon: Seriously. I feel like I've got a fish tank in my pelvis. Leonard: So go to the bathroom. Sheldon: I can't. Leonard: Why not? Sheldon: Because I'm trying to decide between getting an Xbox One or a PS4. Oh, pee, why'd I say that? Leonard: Forgive me for asking a stupid question, but why are you being stupid? Sheldon: I'm not being stupid. I'm employing the work of Dutch researcher, Mirjam Tuk, who found that people with full bladders make better decisions. Leonard: Why did I pee before I decided to move in here? Penny: Hi. Leonard: Hey. Oh, how'd the audition go? Penny: I killed it. I was even able to cry real tears right on the spot. Leonard: Oh, that's great. Penny: I know. Next time I get pulled over for a speeding ticket, here come the waterworks. Sheldon: Here come the waterworks. Leonard: Aren't you gonna ask? Penny: What is this, my first day? Credits sequence. Scene: Penny's apartment. Bernadette: Can I get your opinion on something that happened at work today? Penny: Yeah, sure. Amy: Of course. Bernadette: Okay, well, I did something that will either make me look like a lovable goof or a horrible monster damned to spend eternity in hell. Amy: I'm sure it's lovable. Penny: I'm gonna go with monster. What do you got? Bernadette: Well, there's this lady in our office who's retiring, and they were passing around one of those big cards for us to sign. Amy: Okay. Bernadette: But no one told me she was in a horrible car accident over the weekend and what I was signing was not a retirement card but was actually a get well card. Penny: I'm liking my odds here. Bernadette: So on the card, in
SUMMARY:
Decision time: Raj must decide if to date both Emily and Lucy, Penny must decide whether to accept a role in a horrible horror movie, Serial Apeist 2, and Sheldon is torn between buying a PlayStation 4 or an Xbox One. Sheldon's decision ramblings annoy Amy during their dinner date where she fakes exaggerated interest, then pondering his choices for hours at Best Buy. Leonard and Penny talk to Wil Wheaton to ask for career advise. Wil instead remembers his career rejections and hardships in the acting industry and ends up being depressed. After accepting the job, Penny discovers Wil is the bikini-clad orang-utan she must wrestle in the film. Emily tells Raj she doesn't mind him dating someone else, so he keeps on seeing her. Meanwhile, after signing a card for a co-worker she thought was retiring, Bernadette discovers her message is highly inappropriate as the card is actually a "get well" card for the woman, who has been in a terrible accident.