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collapses under its own meager weight .

this is mild-mannered , been-there material given a pedestrian spin by a director who needed a touch of the flamboyant , the outrageous .

if you adored the full monty so resoundingly that you're dying to see the same old thing in a tired old setting , then this should keep you reasonably entertained .

technically and artistically inept .

those who are only mildly curious , i fear , will be put to sleep or bewildered by the artsy and often pointless visuals .

though tom shadyac's film kicks off spookily enough , around the halfway mark it takes an abrupt turn into glucose sentimentality and laughable contrivance .

a long , dull procession of despair , set to cello music culled from a minimalist funeral .

call me a cold-hearted curmudgeon for not being able to enjoy a mindless action movie , but i believe a movie can be mindless without being the peak of all things insipid .

death might be a release .

'[hopkins]doesn't so much phone in his performance as fax it . no , even that's too committed . he gets his secretary to fax it . "

sodden and glum , even in those moments where it's supposed to feel funny and light .

priggish , lethargically paced parable of renewal .

a beautifully shot but dull and ankle-deep 'epic . '

even with its $50-million us budget , pinocchio never quite achieves the feel of a fanciful motion picture .

this is a third-person story now , told by hollywood , and much more ordinary for it .

the filmmakers know how to please the eye , but it is not always the prettiest pictures that tell the best story .

written , flatly , by david kendall and directed , barely , by there's something about mary co-writer ed decter .

the characters are interesting and the relationship between yosuke and saeko is worth watching as it develops , but there's not enough to the story to fill two hours .

very well made , but doesn't generate a lot of tension .

like being invited to a classy dinner soiree and not knowing anyone . you leave the same way you came -- a few tasty morsels under your belt , but no new friends .

it's depressing to see how far herzog has fallen .

the question hanging over the time machine is not , as the main character suggests , 'what if ? ' but rather , 'how can you charge money for this ? '

millions of dollars heaped upon a project of such vast proportions need to reap more rewards than spiffy bluescreen technique and stylish weaponry .

" freaky friday , " it's not .

perhaps a better celebration of these unfairly dismissed heroes would be a film that isn't this painfully forced , false and fabricated .

although no pastry is violated , this nasty comedy pokes fun at the same easy targets as other rowdy raunch-fests -- farts , boobs , unmentionables -- without much success .

in this film , aussie david caesar channels the not-quite-dead career of guy ritchie .

maybe you'll be lucky , and there'll be a power outage during your screening so you can get your money back .

the characterizations and dialogue lack depth or complexity , with the ironic exception of scooter .

this film was made by and for those folks who collect the serial killer cards and are fascinated by the mere suggestion of serial killers . for the rest of us , sitting through dahmer's two hours amounts to little more than punishment .

narc can only remind us of brilliant crime dramas without becoming one itself .

somewhere inside the mess that is world traveler , there is a mediocre movie trying to get out .

a tedious parable about honesty and good sportsmanship .

its strengths and weaknesses play off each other virtually to a stand-off , with the unfortunate trump card being the dreary mid-section of the film .

an artful yet depressing film that makes a melodramatic mountain out of the molehill of a missing bike .

the movie's ultimate point -- that everyone should be themselves -- is trite , but the screenwriter and director michel gondry restate it to the point of ridiculousness .

a glossy knock-off of a b-movie revenge flick .

. . . expands the horizons of boredom to the point of collapse , turning into a black hole of dullness , from which no interesting concept can escape .

it's just plain boring .

sad nonsense , this . but not without cheesy fun factor .

one of those decades-spanning historical epics that strives to be intimate and socially encompassing but fails to do justice to either effort in three hours of screen time .

really dumb but occasionally really funny .

the movie wavers between hallmark card sentimentality and goofy , life-affirming moments straight out of a cellular phone commercial .

a half-assed film .

the director's many dodges and turns add up to little more than a screenful of gamesmanship that's low on both suspense and payoff .

while the transgressive trappings ( especially the frank sex scenes ) ensure that the film is never dull , rodrigues's beast-within metaphor is ultimately rather silly and overwrought , making the ambiguous ending seem goofy rather than provocative .

the satire is unfocused , while the story goes nowhere .

they threw loads of money at an idea that should've been so much more even if it was only made for teenage boys and wrestling fans .

it's mired in a shabby script that piles layer upon layer of action man cliché atop wooden dialogue and a shifting tone that falls far short of the peculiarly moral amorality of [woo's] best work .

reyes' directorial debut has good things to offer , but ultimately it's undone by a sloppy script

if you're over 25 , have an iq over 90 , and have a driver's license , you should be able to find better entertainment .

the darker elements of misogyny and unprovoked violence suffocate the illumination created by the two daughters and the sparse instances of humor meant to shine through the gloomy film noir veil .

. . . the picture's cleverness is ironically muted by the very people who are intended to make it shine .

never does " lilo & stitch " reach the emotion or timelessness of disney's great past , or even that of more recent successes such as " mulan " or " tarzan . "

one of those so-so films that could have been much better .

crossroads feels like a teenybopper ed wood film , replete with the pubescent scandalous innuendo and the high-strung but flaccid drama .

fails to satisfactorily exploit its gender politics , genre thrills or inherent humor .

interview with the assassin is structured less as a documentary and more as a found relic , and as such the film has a difficult time shaking its blair witch project real-time roots .

cacoyannis' vision is far less mature , interpreting the play as a call for pity and sympathy for anachronistic phantasms haunting the imagined glory of their own pasts .

it has more in common with a fireworks display than a movie , which normally is expected to have characters and a storyline .

it appears to have been made by people to whom the idea of narrative logic or cohesion is an entirely foreign concept .

less a heartfelt appeal for the handicapped than a nice belgian waffle .

it's not helpful to listen to extremist name-calling , regardless of whether you think kissinger was a calculating fiend or just a slippery self-promoter .

abandon spends 90 minutes trying figure out whether or not some cocky pseudo-intellectual kid has intentionally left college or was killed . the only problem is that , by the end , no one in the audience or the film seems to really care .

no such thing is sort of a minimalist beauty and the beast , but in this case the beast should definitely get top billing . robert john burke as the monster horns in and steals the show .

due to stodgy , soap opera-ish dialogue , the rest of the cast comes across as stick figures reading lines from a teleprompter .

[t]he film is never sure to make a clear point – even if it seeks to rely on an ambiguous presentation .

while it may not add up to the sum of its parts , holofcener's film offers just enough insight to keep it from being simpleminded , and the ensemble cast is engaging enough to keep you from shifting in your chair too often .

an overwrought taiwanese soaper about three people and their mixed-up relationship .

nobody seems to have cared much about any aspect of it , from its cheesy screenplay to the grayish quality of its lighting to its last-minute , haphazard theatrical release .

a thoroughly awful movie--dumb , narratively chaotic , visually sloppy . . . a weird amalgam of 'the thing' and a geriatric 'scream . '

. . . another example of how sandler is losing his touch .

nothing sticks , really , except a lingering creepiness one feels from being dragged through a sad , sordid universe of guns , drugs , avarice and damaged dreams .

what goes on for the 110 minutes of " panic room " is a battle of witlessness between a not-so-bright mother and daughter and an even less capable trio of criminals .

the plot's contrivances are uncomfortably strained .

guilty of the worst sin of attributable to a movie like this : it's not scary in the slightest .

schnieder bounces around with limp wrists , wearing tight tummy tops and hip huggers , twirling his hair on his finger and assuming that's enough to sustain laughs . . .

its simplicity puts an exclamation point on the fact that this isn't something to be taken seriously , but it also wrecks any chance of the movie rising above similar fare .

by the final whistle you're convinced that this mean machine was a decent tv outing that just doesn't have big screen magic .

to say that this vapid vehicle is downright doltish and uneventful is just as obvious as telling a country skunk that he has severe body odor .

a film of empty , fetishistic violence in which murder is casual and fun .

pretend it's a werewolf itself by avoiding eye contact and walking slowly away . it's fun , but it's a real howler .

some fine acting , but ultimately a movie with no reason for being .

it's difficult to feel anything much while watching this movie , beyond mild disturbance or detached pleasure at the acting .

a waterlogged version of 'fatal attraction' for the teeny-bopper set . . . a sad , soggy potboiler that wastes the talents of its attractive young leads .

it tells its story in a flat manner and leaves you with the impression that you should have gotten more out of it than you did .

sweet gentle jesus , did the screenwriters just do a cut-and-paste of every bad action-movie line in history ?

it's not the worst comedy of the year , but it certainly won't win any honors .

this is for the most part a useless movie , even with a great director at the helm .

a loud , witless mess that has none of the charm and little of the intrigue from the tv series .

even on its own ludicrous terms , the sum of all fears generates little narrative momentum , and invites unflattering comparisons to other installments in the ryan series .

though it inspires some ( out-of-field ) creative thought , the film is -- to its own detriment -- much more a cinematic collage than a polemical tract .

as predictable as the outcome of a globetrotters-generals game , juwanna mann is even more ludicrous than you'd expect from the guy-in-a-dress genre , and a personal low for everyone involved .

sinks into the usual cafeteria goulash of fart jokes , masturbation jokes , and racist japanese jokes .

where tom green stages his gags as assaults on america's knee-jerk moral sanctimony , jackass lacks aspirations of social upheaval .

more of an intriguing curiosity than a gripping thriller .

the april 2002 instalment of the american war for independence , complete with loads of cgi and bushels of violence , but not a drop of human blood .

contains all the substance of a twinkie -- easy to swallow , but scarcely nourishing .

return to neverland manages to straddle the line between another classic for the company and just another run-of-the-mill disney sequel intended for the home video market .

rarely does a film so graceless and devoid of merit as this one come along .