The Off-Duty Bod Is the New Dad Bod
You know that guy who was ripped for a little while and is now taking it easy, but not too easy? Send him my way.
By Lane Moore
AKM-GSI/AKM-GSI/Grey Wasp/Blue Wasp/SplashNews
A lot of women love muscular, jacked AF dudes and I totally get that (kind of). It's pretty primal to be attracted to some hulking human beast who could protect you in the wilderness. Still, other women love husky dudes who are always carrying a little extra weight, like adorably soft lumberjacks who will Netflix and chill with you and never make you go to Crossfit. And others, still, are into wispy men who look borderline emaciated because they have jackrabbit metabolisms and sensitive stomachs.
While I'm attracted to all of these types of dude bodies and more, guys who fall into the "I usually work out five times a week doing intense strength training and core work, but right now I just want to lay on a beach for three weeks because working out is exhausting" category can get it. This type of guy isn't quite husky, but his abs aren't so chiseled that you're worried that if you get too close to them, they'll slice you like a serial killer's knife. If you're a guy who usually works out a lot but is currently taking time off to eat nachos and do jack-shit, I am all over you faster than you can say, "Let's stay in tonight. I'm tired."
There is something so damn hot about a guy who, for whatever reason, got really, really ripped and now has chosen to reintroduce carbs to his diet for a while. These are the guys who are formerly ripped but still have those "oh, come on, that is so hot it's annoying" defined cuts in their lower abs that direct your eyes straight to their junk.
These guys might help you form the picture in your mind if you're having trouble:
I met this guy on the subway and he invited himself to come with me to @colbertlateshow
A post shared by John Krasinski (@johnkrasinski) on Jan 5, 2016 at 2:27pm PST
I ❤️ BJ I do. I mean I really do. And I for one am not afraid to admit it. I love Beijing. OK?! There. I said it. I ❤️BJ I feel so much better. #Beijing #China #tentemplesquare #JurassicWorldGlobalPressTour!!! #NextStopUK here we go!
A post shared by chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) on May 27, 2015 at 12:00pm PDT
See what I mean? If they were any more jacked, they would be the worst cuddling partners ever (Who wants to sleep on a pillow made entirely of hard organ meats?), so their specific brand of "I'm gonna be a person for a bit before I may or may not go back to being a human Greek statue" makes them hot without being scary. (Seriously, I can't be the only woman who is slightly frightened of super-ripped dudes, right?)
But the major appeal of the off-duty bod is what it says about the guy. He loves staying healthy and working hard to get what he wants, but he's also not going to sprint out of my bed in the morning because if he doesn't do his core work his world will collapse. He'll eat pizza and cheesecake with me and be ever-flexible on his idea of what perfection means. The off-duty bod guy knows that you can be hot when you're in peak physical condition (as defined by society) and when you're a little softer because you feel like eating bagel bites for every meal lately. That in turn makes me feel like they'll think I'm hot if I did Pilates five days in a row for six months or haven't done it once in the last six months, which is comforting as hell.
Because of that, my heart will always be drawn to these guys who love achieving their goals, but are also cool if they don't achieve them every time. They know there's a lot to be said for working hard to make your body the way you want it to be, but you know what else there's a lot to be said for? Eating mass quantities of food and not leaving your bed all weekend because cuddling exists and so does Chinese food delivery.
And I'm into guys who want to do either one (but duh, preferably the latter).
Follow Lane on Twitter and Instagram.
Lane Moore Sex & Relationships Editor I'm Lane Moore, sex & relationships editor at Cosmopolitan.com.
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