Darkness at 3AM: Leave her aLeona or something
Over at 3AM, they also headline their Brits coverage with the non-winning of Leona Lewis. As if it wasn't bad enough being passed over four times, we're sure that Leona will be delighted to see her not winning is the key theme of this year's prizes.
3AM's pun is even blunter than Smart's:
LEONA LOSER
We consoled a disappointed Leona who got nothing after being nominated for four awards - including Female Solo Artist, Album, Single and Breakthrough Act.
... and then went home to call her a Loser. Charming.
Apparently, Paul McCartney's performance was like scrubbing the world's minds with minderasers:
Beatles legend Sir Paul McCartney had the last laugh on money-grabbing Heather Mills in his Brits performance last night - by erasing her from his life.
Sir Paul dedicated his Outstanding Contribution finale to his late wife and love of his life, Linda. But he completely ignored Mills in a video montage of his life. The cheeky ex had been begging to come to the ceremony but Brits bosses were warned to keep her away.
Really? How odd he didn't choose to feature the woman he's in the middle of fighting in an acrimonious divorce in his best bits clips show.
It's not quite "erasing her from his life", though, is it? Not until the cash transfer goes through.
More from No Rock on 3am girls, brits, brits 2008, heather mills, leona lewis, paul mccartney
I like their suggestion that McCartney himself created the introductory clips package. I can see him now, poring over Windows Movie Maker, trying out every filter and transition with glee, until the whole thing looks less like a career retrospective and more like that episode of QED when Kenny Everett showed all the cool video effects you could do in Paintbox.