Q:

Math Anxiety get in the way of my Graduate School, I want to continue PhD

Probably it's just another advice-seeking CS student about math.. Well. I have math anxiety. Im a CS student, back then in undergrad I deal with code everyday, as long as my program work smoothly, i'm fine. I graduated with cumlaude honor in my undergrad school. I can say I'm pretty good with my coding skill. Now that I get into grad school (master), everything needs fundamental motivation, reasoning.. and a lot of math.  
I'm always afraid of math, and never really good at numbers, can't remember formulas, brains so slow at processing equation. Especially when someone's watching me, I kind of revert back to kindergarten stage. I even failed a simple matrix multiplication when my prof was watching me did it on the white board, I was so devastated, it was just matrix multiplication ! I felt like a failure to the point that I cried when I got back home. Whenever I read papers and it comes to method section with a lot of equations, I got very nervous, I'm not even exaggerating. 
I tried to talk to people I trust about this problem, and turn out this is a phobia, they call it math anxiety. I wish I had known sooner so I could do something about it, I thought I was just stupid. Also, I came from a country when math is "God", you're a good kid if you're smart at math. So I was called stupid for a while back then.. which I think makes my anxiety even worse. 
Good point, I continued college, and even grad school so no one call me stupid again. I was a teaching assistant in several coding courses in undergrad, even my juniors told me they understand a lot from my course explanation, I'm good at presentation, demo program, anything .. i'm just so bad, at math.  
But I want to change. I want to learn math again. I read article about "How to Science" and how math is in everyday life. I really want to continue PhD, but the future idea that I will deal with a lot of math stuff always fright me out. I also read What methods successfully identify and eliminate severe math anxiety? and How to overcome mathematics-related anxiety? and I got several ideas and book suggestion from the answer
What I've been doing :

Study from Khan Academy (this will be to basic for grad school level, but I feel that I need to start all over).
Study from Daniel Shiffman channel on youtube. He's a professor and programmer. And sometimes in his coding he's using math, and he's very good at explaining stuff, even I can understand his math better than what my college professor taught me.

I will need to deal with computational logic, and artificial intelligence that requires a lot of math. I need some advice for my future PhD plan : either is there anyway we can actually continue PhD with minimum math ability ? or, I'll try to be real here, I read here, that's it's too late to learn math when you're already in Grad School. Do you think I should just go, and continue and improve on aspects that I'm already good at (like, coding) ? or do you think no matter what I still need the fundamental understanding about math ? Thank you.

A:

In the immortal words of Dirty Harry, a man's gotta know his limitations.  I recommend not to bang your head against the wall on the most theoretical and math intensive parts of CS, when you are weak at math and good at coding.  And there are lots of needs for good coders without much math.
It's strongly likely that your issue is not nervousness (knowing the stuff and failing in tests) but general weakness on the material.  Nevertheless, whether your issue is test anxiety or skill, the way to remedy that is with drill ("do homework until you puke, then do some more").
Kahn Academy videos are time inefficient.  I would work through the Frank Ayers Schaum's first year college math book (geometry, algebra, trig, analytical geometry) instead. 
In addition, you should use the regular course problems you work on as an opportunity to increase your skill level in the lower level skills by practice.  For instance if you are doing some linear algebra and you get the matrices right but mess up some arithmetic, DO THE PROBLEM OVER.  Don't say, "oh, I got the higher level concept".  Instead look on it as an opportunity to perfect the fundamental skills.  (Like doing pushups for punishment...you get good at pushups and stop messing up the football plays also...it's just how the human animal works...we are not computers...we have to be trained like dogs.  We are protein, not silicon.)
I would also talk to an instructor; devise a plan for remediation/improvement and then check in with him as you work through it.
All that said (2-5), GOTO (1).  

