help me find something Alan Kay said
RiderOfGiraffes: http://userpage.fu-berlin.de/~ram/pub/pub_jf47ht81Ht/doc_kay...From here :
http://learningevolves.wikispaces.com/alanKay+talk    Alan Kay regrets the terminology, object orientated,
    thinking later that message orientated would have
    expressed it better.

This seems the most definitive:http://lists.squeakfoundation.org/pipermail/squeak-dev/1998-...    Just a gentle reminder that I took some pains at the
    last OOPSLA to try to remind everyone that Smalltalk
    is not only NOT its syntax or the class library, it
    is not even about classes. I'm sorry that I long ago
    coined the term "objects" for this topic because it
    gets many people to focus on the lesser idea.

    The big idea is "messaging" -- that is what the kernal
    of Smalltalk/Squeak is all about ...