Do you criticize?
DanielBMarkham: For some reason, we socialize people today that criticizing people means that you are smarter than them. I've had people pick apart parts of my comments that weren't even germane to the discussion at hand simply because I said something "wrong"This is why most journalists have a one-email rule: you can write and say hello or thanks for the article and get a reply, but very rarely can you continue a conversation past a couple of exchanges. There are simply too many people on the net who like to argue and criticize.How do you deal with coworkers doing/saying stupid thingsLearn the four magic words, "Help me to understand..."There are 3 possible conditions. 1) They are mixed up and you are correct, 2) You are mixed up and they are correct, and 3) You are both mixed up. Given equal weighting, 2/3rds of the time you're the person who is mixed up. So when somebody says something that doesn't sound right, ask them to explain it to you. Heck, you might learn something.In that same spirit (humility and learning), you may want to offer some education to somebody who is struggling. But that's only after you listen. Listening gives you the right to talk.To save time on the net, I usually try to restate what I think the other person is saying and then provide the way I understand the situation. "If I understand you correctly, you're saying that large weasels were the first inhabitants of the New World. That's very interesting, because as I understand it, there have been no large weasel fossils found here. Help me to understand. Is there something I might be missing?"Part of the problem with the net is that deep in our minds we view other posters as somehow just part of the machine and not real live humans, whether we acknowledge that or not. So we say things in comments we would never say face-to-face. Programmers are very analytical. When something appears in a program on in a thread that is "incorrect" we must jump in and stomp it out immediately! That little Mr. Spock in all of us turns on and immediately whips up a retort and criticism to show to others just how much more we know.