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the mantra behind the project seems to have been 'it's just a kids' flick . ' translation : 'we don't need to try very hard . '

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in all the annals of the movies , few films have been this odd , inexplicable and unpleasant .

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it takes a really long , slow and dreary time to dope out what tuck everlasting is about . so here it is : it's about a family of sour immortals .

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an essentially awkward version of the lightweight female empowerment picture we've been watching for decades

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the author's devotees will probably find it fascinating ; others may find it baffling .

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writer-director walter hill and co-writer david giler try to create characters out of the obvious cliches , but wind up using them as punching bags .

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there's a scientific law to be discerned here that producers would be well to heed : mediocre movies start to drag as soon as the action speeds up ; when the explosions start , they fall to pieces .

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a cockeyed shot all the way .

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lush and beautifully photographed ( somebody suggested the stills might make a nice coffee table book ) , but ultimately you'll leave the theater wondering why these people mattered .

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unfortunately , one hour photo lives down to its title . thanks largely to williams , all the interesting developments are processed in 60 minutes -- the rest is just an overexposed waste of film .

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cold , sterile and lacking any color or warmth .

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the film is undone by anachronistic quick edits and occasional jarring glimpses of a modern theater audience watching the events unfold .

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seems like someone going through the motions .

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for a film about explosions and death and spies , " ballistic : ecks vs . sever " seems as safe as a children's film . well , in some of those , the mother deer even dies .

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wallace gets a bit heavy handed with his message at times , and has a visual flair that waxes poetic far too much for our taste .

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impostor doesn't do much with its template , despite a remarkably strong cast .

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wraps itself in the guise of a dark and quirky comedy , but it isn't as quirky as it thinks it is and its comedy is generally mean-spirited .

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choppy , overlong documentary about 'the lifestyle . '

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one sloughs one's way through the mire of this alleged psychological thriller in search of purpose or even a plot .

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a film which presses familiar herzog tropes into the service of a limpid and conventional historical fiction , when really what we demand of the director is to be mesmerised .

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it's a fanboy 'what if ? ' brought to life on the big screen .

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the story itself is actually quite vapid .

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it's a hellish , numbing experience to watch , and it doesn't offer any insights that haven't been thoroughly debated in the media already , back in the dahmer heyday of the mid-'90s .

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wait for pay per view or rental but don't dismiss barbershop out of hand .

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a few zingers aside , the writing is indifferent , and jordan brady's direction is prosaic .

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each scene drags , underscoring the obvious , and sentiment is slathered on top .

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would've been nice if the screenwriters had trusted audiences to understand a complex story , and left off the film's predictable denouement . then nadia's birthday might not have been such a bad day after all .

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one of those staggeringly well-produced , joylessly extravagant pictures that keep whooshing you from one visual marvel to the next , hastily , emptily .

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nair just doesn't have the necessary self-control to guide a loose , poorly structured film through the pitfalls of incoherence and redundancy .

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enthusiastically taking up the current teen movie concern with bodily functions , walt becker's film pushes all the demographically appropriate comic buttons .

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it's the funniest american comedy since graffiti bridge .

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that neither protagonist has a distinguishable condition hardly matters because both are just actory concoctions , defined by childlike dimness and a handful of quirks .

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what starts off as a possible argentine american beauty reeks like a room stacked with pungent flowers .

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the project's filmmakers forgot to include anything even halfway scary as they poorly rejigger fatal attraction into a high school setting .

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in old-fashioned screenwriting parlance , ms . shreve's novel proved too difficult a text to 'lick , ' despite the efforts of a first-rate cast .

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solondz may well be the only one laughing at his own joke

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stitch is a bad mannered , ugly and destructive little * * * * . no cute factor here… . not that i mind ugly ; the problem is he has no character , loveable or otherwise .

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deep down , i realized the harsh reality of my situation : i would leave the theater with a lower i . q . than when i had entered .

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a really funny fifteen-minute short stretched beyond its limits to fill an almost feature-length film .

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aside from the fact that the film idiotically uses the website feardotcom . com or the improperly hammy performance from poor stephen rea , the film gets added disdain for the fact that it is nearly impossible to look at or understand .

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it is bad , but certainly not without merit as entertainment .

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for its 100 minutes running time , you'll wait in vain for a movie to happen .

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a work that lacks both a purpose and a strong pulse .

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a faster paced family flick . upper teens may get cynical . smaller numbered kidlets will enjoy .

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while this film has an 'a' list cast and some strong supporting players , the tale -- like its central figure , vivi -- is just a little bit hard to love .

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it's a road-trip drama with too many wrong turns .

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most fish stories are a little peculiar , but this is one that should be thrown back in the river .

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it's all gratuitous before long , as if schwentke were fulfilling a gross-out quota for an anticipated audience demographic instead of shaping the material to fit the story .

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" i blame all men for war , " [the warden's daughter] tells her father . the movie is about as deep as that sentiment .

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it's fitfully funny but never really takes off .

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i've seen some bad singer-turned actors , but lil bow wow takes the cake .

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by halfway through this picture i was beginning to hate it , and , of course , feeling guilty for it . . . . then , miracle of miracles , the movie does a flip-flop .

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for all the complications , it's all surprisingly predictable .

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it's been 20 years since 48 hrs . made eddie murphy a movie star and the man hasn't aged a day . but his showboating wise-cracker stock persona sure is getting old .

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if deuces wild had been tweaked up a notch it would have become a camp adventure , one of those movies that's so bad it starts to become good . but it wasn't .

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for a film about action , ultimate x is the gabbiest giant-screen movie ever , bogging down in a barrage of hype .

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. . . a low rate annie featuring some kid who can't act , only echoes of jordan , and weirdo actor crispin glover screwing things up old school .

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it might not be 1970s animation , but everything else about it is straight from the saturday morning cartoons – a retread story , bad writing , and the same old silliness .

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the picture seems uncertain whether it wants to be an acidic all-male all about eve or a lush , swooning melodrama in the intermezzo strain .

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tends to plod .

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a nearly 21/2 hours , the film is way too indulgent .

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gorgeous to look at but insufferably tedious and turgid . . . a curiously constricted epic .

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it looks much more like a cartoon in the end than the simpsons ever has .

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with a tighter editorial process and firmer direction this material could work , especially since the actresses in the lead roles are all more than competent , but as is , personal velocity seems to be idling in neutral .

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doesn't really add up to much .

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it's better suited for the history or biography channel , but there's no arguing the tone of the movie - it leaves a bad taste in your mouth and questions on your mind .

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an entertainment so in love with its overinflated mythology that it no longer recognizes the needs of moviegoers for real characters and compelling plots .

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a prolonged extrusion of psychopathic pulp .

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borrows from other movies like it in the most ordinary and obvious fashion .

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it's surprisingly bland despite the heavy doses of weird performances and direction .

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a chilly , remote , emotionally distant piece . . . so dull that its tagline should be : 'in space , no one can hear you snore . '

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the characters seem one-dimensional , and the film is superficial and will probably be of interest primarily to its target audience .

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sorvino makes the princess seem smug and cartoonish , and the film only really comes alive when poor hermocrates and leontine pathetically compare notes about their budding amours .

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it's like a drive-by . you can drive right by it without noticing anything special , save for a few comic turns , intended and otherwise .

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everything -- even life on an aircraft carrier -- is sentimentalized .

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this would-be 'james bond for the extreme generation' pic is one big , dumb action movie . stress 'dumb . '

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the movie has generic virtues , and despite a lot of involved talent , seems done by the numbers .

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when your subject is illusion versus reality , shouldn't the reality seem at least passably real ?

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it's a terrible movie in every regard , and utterly painful to watch .

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this is rote spookiness , with nary an original idea ( or role , or edit , or score , or anything , really ) in sight , and the whole of the proceedings beg the question 'why ? '

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a fan film that for the uninitiated plays better on video with the sound turned down .

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too infuriatingly quirky and taken with its own style .

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there's a whole heap of nothing at the core of this slight coming-of-age/coming-out tale .

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as much as i laughed throughout the movie , i cannot mount a cogent defense of the film as entertainment , or even performance art , although the movie does leave you marveling at these guys' superhuman capacity to withstand pain .

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the type of dumbed-down exercise in stereotypes that gives the [teen comedy] genre a bad name .

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distinctly sub-par . . . more likely to drown a viewer in boredom than to send any shivers down his spine .

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plays like a bad blend of an overripe episode of tv's dawson's creek and a recycled and dumbed-down version of love story .

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unless you come in to the film with a skateboard under your arm , you're going to feel like you weren't invited to the party .

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when the casting call for this movie went out , it must have read 'seeking anyone with acting ambition but no sense of pride or shame . '

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just isn't as weird as it ought to be .

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a " home alone " film that is staged like " rosemary's baby , " but is not as well-conceived as either of those films .

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[siegel] and co-writers lisa bazadona and grace woodard have relied too much on convention in creating the characters who surround frankie .

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no film could possibly be more contemptuous of the single female population .

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`hey arnold ! ' has some visual wit . . . but little imagination elsewhere .

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they're going through the motions , but the zip is gone .

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a sluggish pace and lack of genuine narrative hem the movie in every bit as much as life hems in the spirits of these young women .

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a low-budget affair , tadpole was shot on digital video , and the images often look smeary and blurry , to the point of distraction . then again , in a better movie , you might not have noticed .

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it's mindless junk like this that makes you appreciate original romantic comedies like punch-drunk love .

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the movie is like a year late for tapping into our reality tv obsession , and even tardier for exploiting the novelty of the " webcast . "

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tale will be all too familiar for anyone who's seen george roy hill's 1973 film , " the sting . "

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