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there needs to be a "BRexit" for people Who still be watching Teletubbys
just had a nightmare that my account was permanently suspended for referring to "the beach boys" as "the beach boy shit boys"
my follower count nosedives dramatically each time i do this but #The12DaysOfContent must continue http://t.co/QDAFXSrgok
dictionary.com defines the word "Mania" as "excessive excitement or enthusiasm; craze:". "Ziggy Mania" offered none of these things t o me.
my teething ring. my salt lick. my feeding tube. all at once
MAYAN GROUNDHPOG HELD ALOFT BY HAT MAN AT WINTER CEREMONY; STRUCK BY LIGHTNING; TURNED INTO ONE HUMAN SKULL "UH OH NOW WEVE REALLY DONE IT"
i am looking forward to some god damn serious male grooming discussion when everybody runs out of jokes around 2015 or so
the only ones authorized to sneak peeks at my dick are 1) my doctor, 2) my dentist, and 3) my lawyer. as for the trolls? No Dice— Bub.
reminder to all mh followers that if something i post catches your eye you can "Like " or share it to your friends w/ that re-tweet button
people shoot me a lot of Grief just because my wife is a stolen bar urinal with yogi bear's face printed abovbe the drain,. and they should
sunnyDayKitten98: just noticed you posted "Ted Lesbo" on the time lione. Is everything ok? ME: Go away. I dont want you to see me like this.
Oh i cant wait to shit my pants. I cant wait to walk into the bathroom and shit my pants in there and go home
im crying because doctors banned the cure for low T again
lets piSS UP A TOWN!! Everoryone reading this, lets all choose one small town randomly and publicly urinate all over it. Combine our piss
could any influencers share tips on how to "punish" your self for generating low engagement? might need some Pain to keep my head in the game
As rioters descended upon the white house, he silently sat in the dark with a revolver & a glass of whiskey. His mouth stuffed with SlimJims
what do you mean 1800-GOT-JUNK only takes waste "Out" of peoples houses. thats an absurd concept. i will hang the fuck up right now
gaining 400 pounds so i can tattoo the entire quran onto my disgusitng body
me,; attempting to heckle a stand up comedian: Hey pal I dont come to where you work and knock the dick out of oyur mouth!! Mother fucker
think you got it rough? try engineering blog posts while trying to suck down two whole baby bottles full of muscle milk before Solstice ends
my romantic girl friend sees the super blood moon reflected in my greased back hair and pledges then and there to bow to christ our master
pissing in to the toilet without getting over 10% of it on the floor and legs is Suad goals
every time i shit into the toilet i turn around and take a look at it and i am appalled by what i see
RECENTLY GOT INTO MEDITATION; SOME REAL DEEP SHIT; KEEP "THE VIEW" ON DURING SO I CAN ENHANCE MIND AS WELL AS BODY
knocn knock. "whos there" israel. "israel who" 2012 is real. buy paste
these are the same steroids that cops use... and you can now order them online for the very first time
*hangs political cartoon of obama eating The Jobs with a fork and knife up on the office billboard* you see that? ?? hes esating the jobs.
#TagABeautifulGirl im good. im really good and normal. i want to take a women to the shooting range and discuss guns culture. i love humor
Reason For Ban : Unfairly denigrating the SuperPretzel‚Ñ¢ brand. // Date Ban Will Be Lifted : Never
legitimately undesirable mousetrap grit (wasn't asked for)
a cop will spank you publicly just for breast feeding your pitbull in public . but when a bug bites you hes all "euhhh i dont arrest bugs"
doing my favorite " Shit head " activity, kissing a cactus after being fooled nby a mirage
a reasonable compromise, would be to let the ISPs track our Gaming & reward more net neutraility to guys who get the most headshots & combos
theres bullshit Cybervamp and regualr cybervamp, and im the regular one, and youre the bullshit one cause you do shit like play mario games
#FreeSlurpeeDay they dont ever wash the slurpe machines. the cops found a shitty waynes world baseball cap inside one of them
if i wasnt constantly debilitated from online-induced stress i could probably kick off the ass of any guy on here
shame on you for assuming I tattooed "Yes Yes Ya'll" on my newborn infant's head for a less than 100% justifiable reason
nobodys telling me where i should donate 6000 cigarettes. nobodys telling me where theyll do the most help. So i guess ill just smoke them
my heart goes out to people waking up from comas today & not believing the date actually is the number 2 repeated an insane amount of times
- barack "knock 'um down" obama - http://t.co/oW5xdmbLof - mad rodney - http://t.co/yTiRJSiEMX - chemtrail - http://t.co/E4km14dXL9 vote now
phenomenal http://t.co/OcgIteRKEL
if u think you can sub tweet me because its 3am you need to Shut Yuh Ass Up
i deeply apologize for giving like thirty of my followers panic attacks after posting "Whats for lunch " at 1am EST .
the horny ranter clenches his fist in triumph, having been notified that his youtube account has been upgraded to accommodate 15 minute vids
the twilight zone episode where the guy blocks everyone on twitter and becomes startled and bewildered when no one is left to give him favs,
i think that if mensa started getting involved in gang violence, they would easily Win
ilove the idea of beating the shit out of my Son's rival's dad at the little league game with a suitcase full of cash
fun idea; for one day lets unlock all the locked accounts & lay their posts bare for the scrutiny of the Public. then ban them for cowardice
my intense belief: you should not be eligible for the presidency of the United States until you are at least 89 years old
My Business Logo: a composite of sexy lady legs cut out from a variety of images and arranged to spell the word "Gordo"
#ToTheGirls2016 im intelligent & clean boy. i have the trigger dicispline of a lion. ive used Torture to cure myself of all mental illness.
COWORKER: I Just took out a little baggie of DouDou, to eat at work, and Im getting a raise, for being handsome ME: I Admire your Opinions .
(truyng to stumble across the next big two-word phrase that gets really popular for no reason) udhhu.. bird hell owl. big hell. owl hell
thinking back to 9/11.. i wish i had flipped out more. Wondering how different things wou;d be if i had gone more ape shit
http://tinyurl.com/38xm9um the blood will set u free
ijust gave some guy in the bathroom $200 and he left. i think i own a toilet now
if this board was real life id be allowed to embed as many bmp files as I want to. if this board was real life you'd change your tune quick
i have defibrillator paddles strapped to each ass cheeck and im ready to bring hell to the nerds
us military strikes deal with PepsiCo to waterboard all terror suspects with Mt Dew??? wish i had some of that Free Dew. who is john galt
" Trump Sucked Me " and " Trump Sucked Me... Again! "
goblin: im going to put up a post saying that the fake news is good, and that i like it more than i like the real news ME: not so fast bitch
and to you, in his will, your great uncle leaves y ou his most treasured possession, the very "POWER BIEBER" that caused his death
never subject yourself to the humiliation of using a public spittoon again- simply spit into your diaper, and USER HAS BEEN BANNED FROM TWIT
the human mind... perhaps the most powerful weapon. second only to the "GUN"
irradiated diaper on 295 blocking up traffic - 500 car pile up - some one come get this thing
consider how unprepared society would be if every bug and moth flying around just started taking giant shits constantly, like human sized
"cmon!! post it!" Oh no, i couldnt possibly. Its too fucked up. Too raw "cmon!! ya gotta post it!" Very well: NHL Players should wear hijabs
if you feel uncomfortable reading about my balls infection, click X. if not, pour a good big beer and let my feed take you to another world,
"Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,
im a journalist now so send me any scoops you might hiave and ill try to post it here if its not perverted
Thread
doctor: i can say with absolute certainty that if you do one more weird trick youll die me: CAPTAIN TIGER's Miracle Corn. LOok it up bastard
i whip out two good uzis and shoot up a fence with the words "INMATURE PEOPLE" painted on the sid.e my father thanks me for this, via skype
in order to get to the bottom of the SEXTING craze, goerge stephanopolis takes a shit on a teens chest #NEWmedia #oldmedia #moralfocus
when you Mock the brand— your putting a Knife in the back of every depressed person who chose not to commit suicide because of Disney IP`s .
FETID BOZO: Ahhh oil spills are bad WISE ADULT: the sun will evaporate the oil, & the wheel of mother gaia spins goodly, As does all things,
im going to start a multimedia network for those who enjoy smacking dingers in the game of base ball and also marry baseball
everyone please soend me the money equivalent of whatever your reply is worth instead of putting your words underneath my posts from now on
(in the 'lets get ready to rumble' man's voice) lllllleeets get ready to post some good shit
boscov's is a highly professional organization Sir, and as such we refuse to engrave "the sex fucker" onto your george foreman panini press
i would NEVER misappropriate funds from my panera bread gloryhole kickstarter to buy mustard gas,, you BRUTES , oyu selfish, horrible APES
"this is going to sound so cool" i rev the engine and it explodes, leaving me rolling around on the road with a smouldering dick & ass crack
i cannot stress enough that my new song "Good town road" is not influenced by any other songs whatsoever
installing a full scale maypole in my backyard... just thinking the boys are going to love this shit
got a big piece of velcro stuck to my big ass
despite everything, i am still looking forward to the release of the sequel, "jungle 3 jungle," which was delayed to 2038 because of trolls.
when firiing a weapon i dont believe in recoil
cmon peopl now smile on your gamers everuybody get together try to do good with your Gamers right now
when the war ended, my grandpa was spit upon but kept his pride—it is in this spirit that i choose to carry the burden of Gamer . #GamerGate
like this if youre one of the 3% of teens who remembers when music was just guys saying "my name is kid rock" over and over
"Thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they...pray...in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men." #NationalAssDay
LOVELY GIRL FOLLOWER: hey.. i noticed you posted 3 barbed remarks about game stop in a row.. is everything ok? ME: NO, everything is NOT ok,
guy who bothered putting a suit on for his profile pic and only has like 300 followers. ha ha ha you dip shit!! youve wasted your life!!!!!!
Geans
no. i dont care where you hold the "2012 Incest Olympics" but its not gonna be on my roof
slobber, by definition, can only come from a mouth. anyone claiming to slobber out of their ass is a liar and possibly a scammer
wearihg some ridiculously shitty looking jeans that look like half of a halloween costume
please check out my new article "Allergy Season is Fucking Good Actually" which will shatter your precious little minds and make yo'u cry
might get really into chewing tobacco for some reason. might start calling it "Tobaccy" . Fuck you
*enrolls in psychology major* finnally. this will give me the upper hand in dealing with trolls *fails all courses* college is fake actually