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cognitive-distortion

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From a young woman in the U.S.: I need advice on this subject pretty urgently because I can’t seem to get it out of my mind and it makes me feel like giving up completely. This probably isn’t the place but I don’t know where else to put this … … Most recently I had a bad week and came into my therapy session that I had written down on the calendar , only to be told I wasn’t scheduled that day for an appointment. I wasn’t feeling great anyway day and honestly I could have probably declared an emergency and talked to someone in emergency services…But I decided against that ,since the girl at the counter told me I could wait and see if the next appointment showed up or not and I would see my therapist if they didn’t show . So I waited …while I was waiting really heavy thoughts started getting to me and I kept repeating it was all my fault this happened in my head …it’s always my fault ….i should die … Stuff like that ..I worked myself into a emotional state.

. So I waited …while I was waiting really heavy thoughts started getting to me and I kept repeating it was all my fault this happened in my head …it’s always my fault ….i should die … Stuff like that ..I worked myself into a emotional state.

5Personalization

My ex girlfriend and I were together 3 years, We broke up around August, I believe that she is not handling it well, having been in 3 relationships since, all women, and she now says she is gay, but is going overboard in trying to prove it. She told me that she was with this new girl to “prove the world wrong.” She has maintained contact with not only me, but my family as well. I am deeply concerned for her welfare, but do not want to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong. My ex is a very lonely woman and is willing to move to another country with this woman that she has only known a couple of weeks. My gut is saying something is off but I wanted a professional opinion. Thank You.

2No Distortion

I’m really freaking out.i don’t know what’s going on with me but I’m starting to question my reality. The other day with my 9-month-old cousin and was questioning whether he was real or not. It scared me so much. I know that it’s isn’t true but that thought get repeating in my head. I suffer from anxiety so I’m hoping that it’s just that but pls tell me what’s wrong. I don’t hear or see things. But i am all of sudden having mildly delusional thoughts that r freaking me out. Pls help.

The other day with my 9-month-old cousin and was questioning whether he was real or not. It scared me so much. I know that it’s isn’t true but that thought get repeating in my head.

9Mental filter

I am 50 year old. as far as i can remember, I have been masturbating from when i was 13 or 14 yrs old. I like masturbation better than sex, I can watch videos and do it. also i like to wear woman’s lingerie or tight clothes and masturbate. I also like bondage videos. I am sometimes jealous of the girls that can wear nice clothes, high heels etc. I am confused. do i have any psychological issue? thanks a lot.

2No Distortion

From the Philippines: So, my boyfriend and I have been in a relationship (we’re both gays, by the way and I’m the receiving end) for over a year now, and I think we’re doing quite really well given that we’ve built our connection through trust, honesty and a lot of empathy and communication. So, about four months since we’ve been together as a couple, he confided to me about his fetish for tummies and stuffing. Of course I researched about it, and I know it’s a part of him that will always be there and I’ve come to accept that fact.

2No Distortion

I love my elder sister very much and have not met her since a long time. I keep missing her too much. The situation has been so intense these days that I have started seeing her in one of my colleagues. I always feel like talking to her, making her smile, making her feel happy. I become very worried about her whenever she is not around. I always tend to disturb her, tease her and annoy her… just to be around her (taking my opportunities to be able to talk to her). But, I don’t know whether she registers it the same way as me. She sometimes makes me feel like she also cares but then some other time she will be calm and quiet. I keep thinking of her all the time… even when we are not in office, even when I will be somewhere else doing something else with some other people. She is all over my mind. With all of this I am not able to concentrate on my work anymore. I am becoming less efficient day by day. It’s like… the thought has engrossed my mind and it cannot think of anything else. I don’t understand what should be done to overcome this. Should I go and tell my condition to her (like the way I see her, the way I care for her)? Would that make me feel relieved? Would I be able to concentrate then? Or, should I remain quiet and let go? (She is resigning our office by this April). Will that aggravate the situation or make me calmer later on? (age 25, from India)

2No Distortion

Let me begin with the symptoms I have had all my life. Ever since I was little, I have been anxious in large crowds, especially in crowds full of strangers, so much so that I spend a lot of my free time, not at work or school, at home. Time outside in situations with people, I find myself struggling to find a topic of conversation, or continuing on with a subject. I find myself saying things at the wrong time, or reacting oddly to other people’s reactions. At times, I seem to incorrectly read people’s emotions, whether spoken or not, and I tend to get angry and frustrated when there is no need to be. Because of this, I am conflicted, because when I am at home, I wish to be out with people doing something, but when I am around my friends and family, though I do enjoy it for some time, I end up wishing I were back at home.

At times, I seem to incorrectly read people’s emotions, whether spoken or not, and I tend to get angry and frustrated when there is no need to be.

8Mind Reading

I have been married for 4 years now. We met 6 months before getting married. My wife was a virgin when she married me and I was not. Our relationship is great and we love each other a lot. No problems. And if we have any arguments we resolve our conflicts before we go to be that night.

2No Distortion

Ever since I was about 15 I have struggled with ever-worsening depression to the point where I was frequently self-harming and not moving for days. I started taking anti-depressants and things improved for a while. For the last year I have felt like something else has been wrong. I have been incredibly irritable and quick to anger. I also developed an intense fear of not being included or of someone else being chosen over me. In the last few weeks I split from my girlfriend which has triggered a major episode in which I attempted to overdose and started self-harming again. I keep getting waves of being intensely suicidal but the next moment I could feel fine. I was in hospital twice in a week (once from the overdose I mentioned and again because I was scared of being on my own in case I tried again).

I also developed an intense fear of not being included or of someone else being chosen over me.

1Emotional Reasoning

From a teen in the Phillipines: I am diagnosed with Adjustment disorder with depressed mood for a year and am still currently taking medications for it. Sometimes I feel that the medications do not work at all and still feel depressed. However, there are also times that I feel like I am getting over it.

2No Distortion

Are there ways to avoid letting chronically angry and verbally abusive people affect your mood? I have a bad-tempered family member that I cannot avoid. She used to yell at me a lot and got violent sometimes. Since I stood up to her several times, she has not dared to attack me directly. Instead, she goes around yelling, swearing, slamming doors and will raise her voice to make sure I hear it if I am far away or in bed. I don’t mind curse words in general, but find the intent and vehemence of her swearing offensive and it is degrading to have this constantly directed at me.

2No Distortion

From a young teen in the U.S.: I hate my family because of my cousin. I have no space. I am forced to be with him all the time everyday. He makes fun of me, calls me names, and is constantly bullying me. My grandma (who I live with) gets me in trouble because I’m supposed to be older than that and not react. my cousin just uses that against me and when finally say something back I’m the one that gets in trouble. When I am with the only friend I am allowed hang out with, my cousin would not leave us alone until I finally snapped and yelled at him.

I have no space. I am forced to be with him all the time everyday.

7Overgeneralization

From a teen in India: I was in a serious relationship for 3 years. both of us were best friends and later it turned to love. We had a amazing relationship which was a matured one. this is both of ours first serious relationship. v had gone through many problems and had been in a verge of breakup a lot of times but managed to get over it.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: 2 years ago my wife walked away from my son and I. She said she didn’t know who she was or what she wanted. She after a few months realized she made a mistake and said she was coming back home. things were ok. We were sexually active with each other. During this time she was living with “the boyfriend.” She was ready to come back and now I found out that there is a 3rd guy in the mix, and she is once again saying she doesn’t know who she is or what she wants. She seems to be all about herself and not her family. Very selfish. She claims we are on different paths in life yet she says she hates what she is doing but she continues to do it and thinks it’s ok.

2No Distortion

I want to know if anything is wrong with me. I crave attention, positive or negative and have done for many years. Over the past year i’ve started to have depressive episodes in which i contemplate hurting myself, and have done, but only minor things to get attention or to avoid having to do something (feel stressed due to being anxious about situations) ive even contemplated killing myself once, though i was under the influence of alcohol, but without the intention of ever commencing the act as i couldn’t do something like that as it would hurt the people i love. i feel ashamed of being like this as i come from a loving family and have great friends and a great life so why do i feel this way!?!

i feel ashamed of being like this as i come from a loving family and have great friends and a great life so why do i feel this way!?!

6Should statements

I have had depression for 3 years. I started taking zoloft 75mg and I was able to come out of depression after a year and half. I eventually weaned myself off of zoloft in april 2010 because I always felt severe fatigue when I was taking it which caused me to feel even more depressed. I have felt pretty good without the meds but here latley I am back to crying for no reason and only able to think about what needs to be done instead of doing it. I feel very overwhelmed when I go to do anything, so I just stay on the couch and do nothing. I feel very irritable when I do have to get up to do anything, and not being able to do anything has been with me since my depression started pretty much. My main question is….. what medication would be best to get me up and moving without feeling irritable or angry or overwhelmed? I have tried taking Wellbutrin but it only made my mind wide awake but I still could not move my body. Any other suggestions? Thanks.

I feel very overwhelmed when I go to do anything, so I just stay on the couch and do nothing. I feel very irritable when I do have to get up to do anything, and not being able to do anything has been with me since my depression started pretty much.

7Overgeneralization

I have been dating a guy for the past 6 months. We met online and both live very busy lives where our careers are very important to us. He currently travels for work to another state Monday-Thursday every week. I am his first serious girlfriend and the only girlfriend he’s introduced to his parents (that don’t even live in the same state as we do). Throughout our 6-month relationship he has taken many steps to show how committed he is to me. For example, when I had received an interview for school in Colorado, he began interviewing for jobs there. For the past couple months, he’s been looking for jobs back in the city that we live in. Despite all the great things he’s done, and despite how much I know he loves me, I have severe trust/jealously issues. My last boyfriend had lied to me and was dating a “friend” while he was dating me. My first love whom I dated for 2.5 years broke up with me because he developed feelings for someone else. Needless to say, I let past experiences and my insecurities get the best of me in my current relationship. I have gotten jealous about his female friends and have admittedly over-reacted many times. However, I have had (what I fear) legitimate reasons to be concerned about his new friendship with a female coworker. Like I said he works out of state during the week. On the phone one night, he mentioned he met a girl at work who’s parents live where his parents live and that she invited him to get together for drinks with her and her brother during Christmas. Fast forward to Christmas, after not responding to my text for hours, he tells me he and his sister were having drinks and playing games at his coworker’s parents house. I got very upset and asked if they had hung out before. He admitted that they spent two hours together ALONE on the beach two days prior. I was distraught and did not speak to him until the next day. He insists they are just friends and I have nothing to worry about. I let it go until I recently saw that they became friends on Facebook. I again got very upset with him and expressed how much it bothered me. He was hurt that I didn’t trust him despite saying time and time again that I had nothing to worry about and that she was just a friend. He isn’t friends with anyone else on Facebook from work other than her and he even works with a guy that went to the same college as him. To me, this situation does not seem right. As I have told him, I fear he has developed feelings for this person and doesn’t want to admit it to himself, let alone me. I don’t want to be with someone who has feelings for someone else and I wish he would just admit it to me if that’s the case. My question is: Am I letting my extreme jealous nature get the best of me and I need to learn to take my boyfriend at his word? Or do I need to interpret my feelings as instinct and walk away from the relationship?

I let it go until I recently saw that they became friends on Facebook. I again got very upset with him and expressed how much it bothered me. As I have told him, I fear he has developed feelings for this person and doesn’t want to admit it to himself, let alone me.

3Magnification

it all began 2 years before. one of my family member is suffering with this problem since 2 years. one day she began talking strange asking all our family members to praise god. as she is a devotee we dint took that seriously. that night she began asking shall we all sleep together and the next night she began to shout vigorously with the name of god and started shouting. early morning we took her to doc and he prescribed some medications and suggested to take her away from home to any relatives house for some days after 2 weeks she began normal but using her medicines. at that time i asked whats wrong. why she behaved like that on dat day. she said i heard some voices to praise the god and that voice is commanding and controlling her and also she had some crawling sensation in spine , inside head, stomach. later on she is doing well. but after a year she stopped using medicines for a month again one day she behaved strangely. so went to doctor and got medicines and she is all fine doing her works , walking but she sometimes says i cant stop my thought process (like she met someone in morning and have a little conversation then later if she stays alone.. all that conversation repeats and repeats and she gets irritated by that) and says some thing moving inside her head just like a dot.our doctor very patiently listens and changes medicines based on the symptoms she says but again the problem begins. she stopped using medicines from 2 weeks as she is feeling more sleepy all the day coz of them and she seemed fine. from the beginning of this month she is not sleeping well. hardly 5 hours.on sept 6th we met doctor and said he stopped using as she is feling sedative. he said medicines and said by using these you may feel dull and lack of appetite.she dint take medicines yesterday and today morning her behaved strangely. i asked her so many times and even showed anger. later she came to my room and said yesterday night i again heared voice to praise lord. once i praised and controlled myself a lot and couldnt sleep.i suggested her to drink milk with honey and take medicine and now she is sleeping.

2No Distortion

Me and my twin sister are 13 and we always have fights. At the end she always say, ” I don’t feel like fight with you ok”. Also I feel like I am lonely at my house. Llike my sister has a boyfriend which she talks to 24/7. So does my mom. And I don’t. I hardly talk to my friends. So I don’t know if I am the reason that I cause it because we are different. But I think we need help so please HELP ME!!!!

Also I feel like I am lonely at my house.So I don’t know if I am the reason that I cause it because we are different.

5Personalization

From the U.S.: I don’t really feel like myself anymore. Can’t enjoy anything I love. Even my dogs just seem boring to me. I have a major passion in music, but I feel like I’ve been avoiding that A LOT lately, which bothers me to the extreme. I hate my job, but my parents won’t let me quit until I get a car. I get it. I really do. But I’m MISERABLE. I don’t feel like myself anymore. Life has lost its color. I’ve become very negative and just not caring about my morals or values anymore. I just don’t really feel real. I feel like I’m just here. Not living.

Can’t enjoy anything I love.

7Overgeneralization

I’m a 25-year-old male attracted to 16-year olds. I thought this was normal since lots of men are into teen girls. 16 is the age of consent in my state. Recently, people were calling this person online a pedophile for being attracted to 17-year olds despite only being 20.

2No Distortion

I am a 25 year old female that has come a long way. I was diagnosed as bipolar at age 18; from there I was institutionalized on many occasions by the age of 21. I was in such a bad condition that when my mother applied for disability on my behalf I was accepted immediately. I was told people are normally denied on their first attempt. The challenge was to find the right medication that would control my depression, insomnia, and suicidal/homicidal thoughts. At age 22, I was placed on Lamictal and Seroquel. I was able to cope, I recently graduated with an A.S. degree as summa cum laude and I received the president’s cup. I have earned various I.T. certifications and I am now studying to be a biomedical engineer. School has been difficult for me, not so much as learning but working in groups or speaking in front of the class. I am not fond of school but I want to earn more money so I can purchase a house in the country. I would have never pictured my life changing in this matter; for the first time in my life, I can honestly say I want to live.

2No Distortion

From the U.S. — I’m 15. So ever since a couple years ago, my parents have became very cautious with what I do on my phone and the computer. Now, they block things on my computer, have my whole computer shut off at “bed time” and have it not turn back on until a specific time.

2No Distortion

I dated this man last year for about 8 months. I wasn’t ready for a committed relationship at the time. Dated him more out of boredom. But he took it more seriously. He had alot of anger issues and was slightly emotionally abusive. One time I let him discipline my then 7 yr old boy, but he got too rough and threw him across his bed. I did not condone this and I swore to my son that he would never have to be around that man again. We had some miscommunication a couple nights later that I used to my advantage and pushed his buttons enough to make him spiral out of control and he came and broke into my house while the kids I were sleeping. No one was hurt and the kids never woke up. I broke up with him the next day after the cops escorted him home. Now to present day another 10 months later we are talking again. He has received enough counseling to help himself and I see him as different and changed for the better. I also am ready for a more committed relationship so we have been seeing each other for about 2 months now. I am so happy and we’ve apologized and he has validated my feelings about what happened that night and in general so that we can try and move on and Im making more of an effort towards a relationship this time, but my son is terrified of him. The bf and I are taking it much slower this time and not involving the kids at all for at least 6 months but will it be possible to reintroduce them and patch things up or am I being selfish for even trying? I gave them my word that he would never be in our lives again because I never in a million years thought it would be possible for him to have changed. I am at a crossroads. Thank you for any advice you have!

2No Distortion

My boyfriend is the kindest person I have ever met. Since the day I met him, he has made me feel that someone cared about me. He always thinks of me and is always willing to listen to anything I have to say. I tell him to be open and honest with me, but I’m never that way with him. I always think he’ll leave me for some pretty girl he’ll meet. And no matter how much he assures me that he loves me, I can’t supress that doubt and fear, and I push him away. I want him to hate me just so I can prove he was just messing with me, but at the same time pushing him away is not what I really want.

I always think he’ll leave me for some pretty girl he’ll meet.

4Fortune-telling

It started recently when I was finishing up my sophomore year of high school. I began to become increasingly paranoid (I thought people were out to get me, and that people kept staring at me, even if I was alone), that people could hear my thoughts, and I kept feeling like there was some sort of presence near me, and/or following me. Not only that, but I would have the occasional auditory hallucination. I didn’t hear voices, but rather noises people make such as breathing (as if someone were right next to me)r when I was alone (happened twice), a snarl (also as if someone were right next to me), and an exhale (right next to me; alone) , however these are minor compared to the visual hallucinations. These occurred in the corner of my eye. I would see moving shadows, full blown people (I would see them moving, sand they would be extremely detailed, but when I looked back they were never there in the first place.[this occurred 3 times]), and sometimes pictures would look like they were moving or finishing an action. Some of my other visual hallucinations I could see directly such as a face at the top of a door (occurred once), and one time I was sitting in drivers Ed and my teacher was talking about bugs when all of the sudden I see two black dots swarming around her head like flies, but it didn’t last long until they flew behind her head and disappeared. Another time I was sitting in a car and I saw a fly, fly right up to my face, so I swatted at it, but I realized that there wasn’t actually a fly, because I couldn’t find it anywhere, neither did I hear the buzzing of its wings. Another instance is when I thought I saw a bug crawling down my arm, but I didn’t feel it, nor did I see it where it should have ended up. Another time u thought I saw a bug crawling across my wall, but again I didn’t see it where it was suppose to end up (on the ceiling; it was crawling up). Not only that but when I walked down the hallways of my school, they would appear to be crooked, and moving, causing me to walk funny. Then there is other stuff like my loss of motivation, emotion (not flat effect), I would miss letters when I wrote, I began talking to my inner voice as if it were real (it talked to me first), I now have a bad attention span, and it’s now fairly hard to get my point across because I’ll get tongue tied, plus my personal hygiene is not the best, and my memory (especially short term) seems to be increasingly getting worse. That last part could be due to my dysthymia, but it still doesn’t explain the rest of the things I’ve been experiencing. I never have and never will use drugs, and I don’t take any medications. Thank you for your time.

2No Distortion

From France: I’m dating a guy with 3 kids. As soon as I started dating him he presented his kids and I thought it was nice. Very soon I FELT THE KIDS DID NOT WANT ME THERE. They took [some] of my stuff and damaged it in a duration of the first three weeks. As I did not find them friendly, I passed my time in the room a lot and I stayed close to my boyfriend and so the kids felt that I do not want them in the couple.

As I did not find them friendly, I passed my time in the room a lot and I stayed close to my boyfriend and so the kids felt that I do not want them in the couple.

8Mind Reading

I’m 17 and I’ve been depressed for about 4 and a half years. It all started when my grandmother died, and I had to move to a whole new city and go to a new school. I always had a lot of friends, well like two or three, right now that feels like so much. When I moved I developed a social disorder, I can’t talk to anyone and I have severe anxiety whenever I am around a lot of people especially teenagers. I moved when I was in the middle of 8th grade, I went to a new middle school and I didn’t make any friends and I thought, oh its okay, maybe I’ll make some in high school. But it only got worse. Right after my grandmother died I also started pulling out my hair (trichotillmania) so it made me very self-conscious to the point where I thought I was the ugliest person ever which only made it harder to talk to people.

Right after my grandmother died I also started pulling out my hair (trichotillmania) so it made me very self-conscious to the point where I thought I was the ugliest person ever which only made it harder to talk to people.

10Labeling

I’ve been depressed for a while, but I was always too embarrassed to get help. But now that I’ve ruined another relationship recently, I decided I should seek help. As a young child, I was always put down by my brother and felt I was never good enough because my dad would never congratulate me on anything, just that I can do better. Now that I’ve been trying to have a relationship with girls, I always make them hate me by putting myself down. Everything I do just makes me feel worse about myself, and I need help with my confidence before I end up hurting myself.

But now that I’ve ruined another relationship recently, I decided I should seek help. As a young child, I was always put down by my brother and felt I was never good enough because my dad would never congratulate me on anything, just that I can do better. Now that I’ve been trying to have a relationship with girls, I always make them hate me by putting myself down. Everything I do just makes me feel worse about myself, and I need help with my confidence before I end up hurting myself.

5Personalization

From a teenaged young woman in the U.S.: There are times where I feel completely fine emotionally, but I’ll find myself thinking “I hate my life” or “I’m a worthless pice of crap” or something else along those lines. It doesn’t make any sense. As soon as I think something like that my immediate reaction is to think/say to myself “what are you talking about, no you don’t/aren’t.”

There are times where I feel completely fine emotionally, but I’ll find myself thinking “I hate my life” or “I’m a worthless pice of crap” or something else along those lines.

5Personalization

From the U.S.: I’m trying to determine the name of what I have so I can research it. Whenever I become romantically involved with a person, the more I trust them, open up to them, feel nurtured by them, and generally as I become emotionally close to them, the less aroused I become by them. I eventually lose any instinct to segue to sexual activity and instead prefer emotional comfort and intimacy. This does not exclude a desire for sexual activity altogether, because I still seek it while losing my ability to see the trusted partner as a viable option.

I eventually lose any instinct to segue to sexual activity and instead prefer emotional comfort and intimacy.

6Should statements

I’ve been (and am still being) emotionally abused by my family. The only reason I put up with it is because I have no choice, it’s not like I can go anywhere else or do anything about it seeing that I don’t have a job, I have no money or any friends and am pretty much a shut-in. I can’t even talk to them about how I feel about their treatment towards me cause they’ll just brush my feelings aside or snap at me and it’s because of that fact that I don’t talk much or if I DO talk, it’s awkward and stilted. I’m getting to the point where I’ll most likely do something drastic if this keeps up (not suicide, if you’re asking).

I can’t even talk to them about how I feel about their treatment towards me cause they’ll just brush my feelings aside or snap at me and it’s because of that fact that I don’t talk much or if I DO talk, it’s awkward and stilted.

8Mind Reading

Hello! I am not very ardent in psychosis so I thought I’d consult. I have recently been doing this thing where if I remember an extremely stressful experience or I recall something I’ve been procrastinating (cleaning a room,homework,organizing emails etc.)/an embarrassing memory my mind feels as if it shakes and only focuses on those memories and I involuntarily (I don’t know how to describe it other as being possessed by the memories) lose control of my hands and they/my shoulders tremor (my fingers lose control and shake in the air in a motion like piano playing, and my shoulders jerk back and forth) and my whole body shakes until I push the certain memory away or focus on gripping a table/my phone and then it calms to only my fingers/hand twitching until I calm down enough to be level-headed. It’s psychically tolling and I am always mentally and psychically exhausted after calming. It is only a thing that has happened in the past year. It can also happen in random spikes, even when I am not breaking-down; as when I’m sitting with friends or out at the movies my hands will take control of themselves and tremor. I have diagnosed disassociative amnesia and schizotypal personality disorder but I can’t find these disorders being tied to these symptoms anywhere. I have only ever taken medicine/psychotherapy for depression symptoms when I was 11-12. Thanks for your time and information!

2No Distortion

Ever since my boyfriend and I started dating, his mother has never made herself approachable. He and I live together, and I am almost 4 months pregnant. He and I are both ecstatic and so is my family. The problem is, his mother has made it very clear she does not like me (she told me) and that she is not happy about this. I had a miscarriage 6 months ago when I was 3 months along. When she found out I was pregnant with that child she asked me why I didn’t get an abortion. When I miscarried she acted like nothing happened and was happy. She then told me how her son would not be having children for a long time. When she found out we were pregnant again she told me she didn’t like me. She was rude and disrespectful.

2No Distortion

I’m struggling to do anything at all, all I really want to do is sit somewhere on my own and rot away forever. I have been skipping school and not keeping in contact with my friends for the past month all of my relationships feel strained like they would be better without me. I really don’t know how to put into words how I feel even though I try they feel so chaotic and confusing I don’t know how to describe them. I normally feel this way when there is a lot of stress and I leave it alone until it overflows, and I end up doing irrational things if I go out. I usually take recreational drugs to cope with this I don’t think I overuse them though. not often. My life is spiraling out of control and I need to find some way to stop it. I don’t know what to do. (From the United Kingdom)

I’m struggling to do anything at all, all I really want to do is sit somewhere on my own and rot away forever.

3Magnification

From a young man in the U.S.: I wanted to understand the link between the upbringing of one , past experiences ,and past ideologies and how much it can affect ones current reasoning. Does a person have utter and complete freedom to change his reality or would there always be a faction of his brain leading him to a biased conclusion because of his past experience. For example can a person fully understand and change his reality without his brain affecting that decision based on his past. In other words , a person who grew up in a religion , and changes his religion, can he or she be able to fully accept a new belief and formulate a new truth based ok current thinking and not be influenced by the past. In other words how much control do humans have to truly shape their reality based on their logic and not be biased based on any past experiences or at least not make a decison base on that fully.

2No Distortion

From a 15 year old boy in Australia: Ever since I was a very small child I’ve felt disengaged from everyone else, as a 6-10 year old only having perhaps one real friend who I very rarely spent time with and many more friends that seemed very real to me but were in fact figments of my imagination I suppose. As well as this I spent most of my time reading. I think this may be built around the sexual abuse from an older boy who I thought I was one of my best friends, or my parents divorce. This has also affected my ability to trust people in my life now.

This has also affected my ability to trust people in my life now.

7Overgeneralization

From the U.S.: I’ve been diagnosed with OCD since summer of 2013 after I had 3 weeks of horrible intrusive thoughts, causing me to cry constantly. I started at 50mg of Zoloft, though soon I had to up it to 75mg then 100mg. I’ve been doing okay with the 100mg, though sometimes I forget to take it. The reason it all started (What I believe…) is after seeing the movie “The Conjuring.” It messed with me, made me afraid of possession or going crazy and hurting someone I love. I still am afraid of these things, but not as much. I haven’t watched any scary movies, but I’ve seen previews and they cause my anxiety to go out the roof. Its 11:17pm right now and I am tired but I’m not laying down because I am still afraid, except its slightly different. Lately, I’ve been feeling like someone is watching me, like a ghost (Lately, meaning in the past week this started.) and I don’t hear any voices or anything but I’m so afraid that I could be going crazy or something, it scares me so much. It may be because I haven’t been taking my Zoloft constantly, not that I ignore it, I honestly forget to take it. I went to my doctor last Monday and everything was okay, what should I do? Should I make another apt? I’ve also had therapy, it did help a lot. Should I go back to therapy? Please let me know, I want a professional opinion before I freak even more out. I’ve been reading too many things on the internet about “Am I insane? Am I crazy? Are ghost real? Am I being haunted?” Thank you.

Lately, I’ve been feeling like someone is watching me, like a ghost (Lately, meaning in the past week this started.) and I don’t hear any voices or anything but I’m so afraid that I could be going crazy or something, it scares me so much.

1Emotional Reasoning

From a teen in the U.S.: Every few months I start feeling a sort of mix between deja vu and dissociation? Starting last year, I have infrequently had this feeling of being in autopilot and being an observer looking through my own eyes as something or someone else keeps going, whether it be driving or working or whatever I may be doing. My personality doesn’t change, it just doesn’t feel like me doing it. I start feeling a bit sick to my stomach, and vague, obscure memories of similar experiences start rushing back, almost as though I’m remembering bits and pieces of dreams I’ve had but previously didn’t remember, similar to the feeling of deja vu. It’s a very intense experience and I usually get rid of it by forcing myself to sleep through it, but I’d like to know if there’s more behind it, and whether I can prevent it or just let it run its course when it happens.

2No Distortion

From Romania: We are together by 8 months now. He is 10 years older, divorced with a daughter that lives with her mom in another city. We are also in a long distance relationship, we live 600km away. We spoke many times per day, he used to send me video with love declarations, we made plans for marriage and moving in the same city, everything was perfect, like he came, he hugged me and I felt like I never did, no more pain, frustrations or bad memories. Just love and the future in front of me.

2No Distortion

I have been seeing my therapist for 4 sessions now to talk about things related to my family, my past, just difficult things I had to go through and our goal is to understand myself better. Now this last time I saw him, he asked me what my sexual fantasies were. I don’t understand how it could be beneficial to talk about them but I didn’t think of that at the time so I didn’t ask him. But is it a violation of privacy’? Is it out of line of him to ask me that? (From the UK)

2No Distortion

From a woman in the U.S.: I have never been able to get an answer to this. We got a family puppy when I was in the 9th grade. Our puppy was scared of being in boxes in which he couldn’t climb out. He would panic and cry for someone to get him out. My mother enjoyed putting the puppy in a box to see what he did and let him panic and cry until I couldn’t take it anymore and picked him up.

2No Distortion

From a 50 year old woman in the U.S.: Mother sexually abused by her father, had schizophrenia or 2-3 other personalities, and was abused by her aunt as a teen, not sexually, but sounds like all other ways. My dad abused me in every way I can remember, except sexually, but often wonder about it as I wet the bed until 8 years old and remember almost nothing before the start of kindergarten, and now at 50 yrs. old, some personality disorder (BPD/DID) just came outta nowhere with 5 personalities so far.

2No Distortion

From Switzerland: I’m 23 and I’ve got a problem: My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and almost 3 months. He’s a great guy who never got angry at me or furious because of my OCD (afraid of germs), he was supporting and even changed his behavior in public to avoid me having a panic attack.

2No Distortion

I don’t know why, but I have the urge to hurt or kill certain things. I was at a friend’s house this weekend and I was playing with their cat. I felt the sudden need to hurt the cat. I don’t know why, I love cats and would never want to hurt one, but my mind just kept telling me to harm it. I never did hurt the cat, I stopped playing with it because of this. Also, when someone gets me annoyed or mad I want to harm them even though there’s really no reason to. I have never hurt or killed anything in my life, but this feeling has been going on for a while now. I don’t know why this is happening, please help!

2No Distortion

I recently found out that my parents told their friends and my boyfriend-now-husband that they gave me pretty sexualized spankings when I was in my late teens. They described them in sexualized detail, or mentioned them in a sexual way in a passing comment. I don’t remember any of them happening. I think they’re lying, but have no idea why. I do know that, without explanation, I am very shy sexually in regards to my butt and positions similar to one’s they described spanking me in. However, I am very adventurous in every other sexual way.

I think they’re lying, but have no idea why.

8Mind Reading

From the U.S.: I’ve never posted online or to a forum before, but I am desperate for advice, or even a solution. We started dating a year ago, and shortly into the relationship we became sexually involved. A few months into the relationship, I started to feel pressured into sexual encounters and so I started to alienate myself from him sexually, but that only started to make him treat me like a sex object, which began to disturb me greatly.

2No Distortion

Is it true that there should be no normal physical contact (hugging, ect) between a male and his female friend? I have a female friend whom with I have been friends with for about 8 years. We are best friends basically, but when we get around each other it is like we never ever touch. Not intentionally or anything. I do like her and want to be with her because seems like it’s only natural that I would develop feelings for her, right? But even though she may not view me in that manner, isn’t it normal for friends to at least hug? We have never hugged , or shared small physical contact (touching of the shoulder, ect.) Is this normal for close male and female friends? Or is this because our fear of sexual arousal? Could it be a sign that she might be interested in me as well but does not want to ruin the friendship?

I do like her and want to be with her because seems like it’s only natural that I would develop feelings for her, right? But even though she may not view me in that manner, isn’t it normal for friends to at least hug?

6Should statements

Whenever I’m holding something sharp in my hands and I’m near someone I wonder what would happen if I stabbed them with it. I won’t be angry, I’ll just be curious, mostly about what the blood looks like. I got so curious that last week, I cut my hand open with a knife so I could see the blood, and I didn’t realize it was strange until I was cleaning it up. Lately, whenever I touch anyone, I start thinking about their insides and wondering what they’d look like cut up.

2No Distortion

Hey there! Just to point this out in advance, I am seeing a few professionals about my mental health, I’m on medication and I’ve already been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, PDD-NOS, and potentially ADHD. I do not have the means to explore these further, but I have regular monthly visits with my psychiatrist and therapist.

2No Distortion

I am having trouble with my 4 year old daughter. She has several things that she cause her great distress if they are not done her way. Our major one we deal with is the bathroom. After she has gone to the bathroom she has to have a certain size piece of toilet paper “too big” is a common phrase we get. On top of it she wipes for what seems like an eternity to me always feeling like she is still wet. She’s not but she will try to wipe every area until she is basically red. I have tried to help her but she has to do it herself, if I try she just gets more angry. If we are in a hurry to get somewhere and I try to help her by wiping her and getting her pants up she has a fit and has to pull her pants down and wipe some more. Same goes with handwashing, it’s the drying part but it’s how long she has to wash. She soaps up for 3-5 minutes then rinses, we have to turn the water off to get her to stop yet if there is one small bubble on her hand left, we have to rinse some more and more and more. This is just the bathroom issues we have.

2No Distortion

Recently i experienced a home invasion by two men with machetes while i was home with my dad only, i experienced the most as i saw them jump over our fence, had the machete held against me, was chased from outside to inside the house etc and i’m not traumatised by the incident whereas my dad was around the other side of the backyard when he came into the house to see them before running back out to get help, hes traumatised {mainly angry}, even though like explained he didn’t experience soomething as traumatic he’s still feeling worse after the incident happened i was completely normal, after the police had left i went to the mall with my friend and her mum who came to my house after the incident to check on me, i was laughing and nothing seemed off with me,  I didn’t think anything of it until her mum mentioned my behaviour was odd considering what had just happened, the police had said this too. Now my parents are angry at me saying im either a psychopath because I’m not fazed by the events or the people who broke in were my friends which would be why im not fazed and why i wasn’t hurt especially because they said they were looking for my dad it seems like i set up the situation which is also what the police insinuated, and even though they were masked we know they were teenagers which is also another factor to add as to why my parents think they were my friends. All of this has made me think about my own mental health, i’ve read alot about resilience being the reason as to why im not traumatised and how i bounced back quickly but the factors that would lead up to me being resilient doesnt add up. Considering my past, it would be stereotyped for me to be non resilient which is why i dont feel me just being generally resilient is correct, making me think something worse is wrong with me. Please clear my confusion. (From Australia)

Considering my past, it would be stereotyped for me to be non resilient which is why i dont feel me just being generally resilient is correct, making me think something worse is wrong with me.

3Magnification

From the U.S.: I’ve had extreme depressive lows with suicidal thoughts for as long as I can remember. I was diagnosed with anxiety as well as depression when I was 16. On my 18th birthday my boyfriend slept with my best friend, but I stayed with him. He became very emotionally abusive towards me and I lost all my friends. I was more depressed than I had ever been in my life. We broke up right before I moved out of state for school. I was still suicidal and started drinking, doing drugs, and having casual sex very frequently. I failed most of my classes. I got a therapist who diagnosed me with ADD.

2No Distortion

Hi, I’m 19 years old and I think I have depression or dysthymia. Since I was about 11, I’ve struggled with periods of extreme sadness/anger that resulted with me cutting myself for a few years. I stopped around 14/15 years old. However, I still I experienced those episodes quite frequently and, despite my ability to refrain from self harm, they were still of the same magnitude. I struggled with suicidal thoughts, I’ve had issues creating and maintaining relationships (for example, I did not make one new friend my whole first year at a huge college, but rather only talked to my boyfriend and a few friends from high school). Now, during the summer, I spend 95% of my time in my house (my parents don’t want me with my boyfriend) and I can’t reach out for professional help without my parents knowing because I’m on their insurance. I wanted a summer job but no places around me wanted to hire workers just for the summer. Stigmas are killing me and my mother, who also suffers mentally/physically, makes it hard for me to leave, connect with others, and has an issue with me and my sister growing up and being independent. (Ex. My sister lives at home but is engaged and my mom gets mad if my sister sees her fiance too often but doesn’t act this way with my brother and his gf). Is there any free online therapy or any free resources I can use to help me? I will not tell my parents while I’m stuck in a house with them, but need help ASAP and I’m just tired of not being happy. Thanks

Stigmas are killing me and my mother, who also suffers mentally/physically, makes it hard for me to leave, connect with others, and has an issue with me and my sister growing up and being independent.

7Overgeneralization

I recently came to the realization that all my life, since maybe 8 years old, I have been micro-harming my body. I bit my lips when I was younger, possibly the first of these occurrences. I would seriously go at them, biting and scabbing, never giving them a chance to heal. Then I remember biting/clipping off my cuticles. Something I’ve been doing for years is flossing WAY too hard, on purpose. I have floss sticks so I purposely make my gums bleed, literally cutting out parts of my gums (none of this is severe, all on a “micro” level like I said). Another one is always picking at my scalp, again purposely creating scabs and picking at them. Sorry for the graphics, but I am so curious as to why I am doing this. Is it a nervous release? Parents got divorced when I was 8, by the way.

2No Distortion

I have plenty of friends, but I feel very alone. I feel like a constant disappointment to my parents, and I don’t know how to feel comfortable with them. I’ve been eating really really badly and I’ve been having a stomach ache for a couple of days this week. I’ve been procrastinating to the point where i rarely do my homework. Also, I love doing theater, yet i haven’t been able to get into the mindset of memorizing lines. Is this just the season, a phase in my growing up, or is something legitimately wrong with me?

I have plenty of friends, but I feel very alone. I feel like a constant disappointment to my parents, and I don’t know how to feel comfortable with them.

9Mental filter

Over the past 30 years, my parents (and particularly my mother) have never been satisfied with the level of effort I expend toward family relationships. As a child I was accused of ignoring and not liking my sister, and forced to seek her out to apologize for hurting her feelings. My sister, by the way, used to pin me to the ground and pull hair out of my head and painfully tickle and pinch me when I was young. Now she is divorced. She has always been a kind yet very negative, sarcastic person with a mean streak. I find being around her very tiring.

Over the past 30 years, my parents (and particularly my mother) have never been satisfied with the level of effort I expend toward family relationships.

7Overgeneralization

Hello doctor — I hope I get an answer for my questions because I desperately need one the problem is not in me but my mother, two months ago mom called my dad and when the discussion was over she over heard him saying stuff to another woman, and since then she was shocked and my dad completely denies it but she won’t believe it the problem is she became like a different person, she stalks every move he does she took away his phone she’s suspicious about every little thing he does, no matter how he treats her she keeps giving him a hard time and never satisfied, she began talking to herself, she faints and starts screaming like a maniac, when she sleeps she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and cursing dad, when I talk with her she never listens she keeps repeating the same thing saying she keeps replaying the words he said to that woman and its killing her and that she still can’t believe it and hopes that it’s just a nightmare she’ll wake up from and she starts questioning everything that has happened before, in short the home is a wreck dad is sick of everything, my little sisters are confused and I’m really worried about them, and mostly mom’s mental health I feel like she’s going crazy soon and its killing me no matter what we say to her she won’t listen she treats all of us badly, I just don’t know what to do I’m really worried and living a nightmare I hope I get some advice. (From Algeria)

Hello doctor — I hope I get an answer for my questions because I desperately need one the problem is not in me but my mother, two months ago mom called my dad and when the discussion was over she over heard him saying stuff to another woman, and since then she was shocked and my dad completely denies it but she won’t believe it the problem is she became like a different person, she stalks every move he does she took away his phone she’s suspicious about every little thing he does, no matter how he treats her she keeps giving him a hard time and never satisfied, she began talking to herself, she faints and starts screaming like a maniac, when she sleeps she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and cursing dad, when I talk with her she never listens she keeps repeating the same thing saying she keeps replaying the words he said to that woman and its killing her and that she still can’t believe it and hopes that it’s just a nightmare she’ll wake up from and she starts questioning everything that has happened before, in short the home is a wreck dad is sick of everything, my little sisters are confused and I’m really worried about them, and mostly mom’s mental health I feel like she’s going crazy soon and its killing me no matter what we say to her she won’t listen she treats all of us badly, I just don’t know what to do I’m really worried and living a nightmare I hope I get some advice.

9Mental filter

From a 15 year old in the UK: I think I have social anxiety, but my mum changes the subject whenever I ask her to get me tested for it. It takes me months to pick up the courage to try to speak to her about it, and every time I finally do it, she doesn’t help me. The first time I asked, she told me to not “talk wet”. She thinks that the doctor will dismiss me straight away because I volunteer at the local Rainbows and Guides. But when I first started helping out at Rainbows, it took me weeks to finally speak, and I always get nervous when the other volunteer talks to me. I was a Guide before I became a Young Leader in the unit, so I knew most of the girls there anyway. Plus, I have my best friend who does most of the talking. I can’t explain any of the games or activities to them because I start mumbling and I blush.

2No Distortion

Hi, first some information to myself. I am a very planning person and hate uncertainty and feel a high degree of responsibility for my family. I also was always afraid of death and therefore also of cancer, heart attacks also. Now I had a panic attack 3 months ago that kicked off thoughts and high fear of suicide. I was so afraid that u went straight to a psychological clinic where I was diagnosed with OCD and a panic disorder. I am lucky, not afraid of driving or knives or anything like that because I really don’t want to die so I don’t think I am a risk for myself. But that now first kicked off the huge fear of a major depression that could change my attitude one day towards the fact that I don’t want to die. Luckily I could also reassure myself that I don’t have depression because I don’t really show any symptoms like listlessness or loss of happiness in activities. I also still see my friends a lot. But I somehow still are very sensitive towards my emotions and anything around me that sound like death depression, sadness, suicide or stuff like that. That stuff scares me. For example, when somebody is making a joke about me I instantly check myself to make sure I am not sad or mad or anything. That goes along with a lot of ruminations about the topics of OCD, suicide, anxiety and psychological disorders itself. I also sometimes have the feeling of derealization when I feel anxious and insecure. And since some days the fear of becoming schizophrenic or psychotic came up heavily. I don’t have any hallucinations or hear anything that isn’t there but the occasional surreal feeling of the world around me freaks me out. I am so scared that I could harm myself in psychosis. I also never took drugs or had any psychological disease in my family. Does that sound to you like an upcoming psychosis or something like that or is it just my OCD that freaks me out? (From Germany)

But I somehow still are very sensitive towards my emotions and anything around me that sound like death depression, sadness, suicide or stuff like that. That stuff scares me. For example, when somebody is making a joke about me I instantly check myself to make sure I am not sad or mad or anything.

9Mental filter

I love with my dad and his long term girlfriend who is practically a mother to me than my own one is. I have always felt like the relationship between me and my parents has gotten slowly worse with age and I feel like there’s this power struggle going on with my dad mainly. I don’t know if I am to blame, if there’s things I can do to improve on the relationship other than sit and just avoid any contact with him, which hasn’t worked or just bend to every rule he makes. He has this very aggressive, controlling nature, using respect as a weapon against any lack of discipline towards him. I respect his house and his rules to a degree, but he makes a lot up as he goes and uses respect, or what he calls lack of respect, for him as a way to manipulate any situation to make me feel like I’m the one in the wrong. I have grown up with the notion of respect being a two way street but also to respect your parents, however I have never respected my birth mother due to her complete lack of human empathy towards anyone other than herself. However I have always respected him, to an extent feared him and it’s been that way for years however I can no longer deal with the sheer stress of living with this and he refuses to acknowledge when he is wrong and believes I am so arrogant and stuck up when I believe I am right when standing up for myself against him. I don’t know what I can do to improve the situation. He’s a good man, he’s always looked after me and taken care of me as any parent should however he has such an aggressive, controlling attitude to everything in his life that it’s just getting to a very toxic point in our lives. However I am the one being blamed for it and not him as well, which makes me depressed and think that maybe there is something wrong with me that I just don’t realise so I really don’t know what to do in this scenario.

I don’t know if I am to blame, if there’s things I can do to improve on the relationship other than sit and just avoid any contact with him, which hasn’t worked or just bend to every rule he makes. However I am the one being blamed for it and not him as well, which makes me depressed and think that maybe there is something wrong with me that I just don’t realise so I really don’t know what to do in this scenario.

5Personalization

I am “in love” with a celebrity male, 29 years older than me. Since I was ten, before I knew his name, I was sexually obsessed with him. That obsession later turned into this “relationship” I made up. I have lost myself, believing that we have many things in common, and that he really loves me even though we never meet. I feel like I will never get over this. I am in a happy relationship now, for over a year, but these sexually desires for this celebrity keep coming back. I come up with these fantasies that his children will love me, his friends want us to be together. I have had a fantasy that he has been looking for me his whole life. I can’t stop.

I feel like I will never get over this.

1Emotional Reasoning

From the U.S.: I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. I love him so much. He has 3 children, who I get along with very well but recently I find myself resenting his daughter (6 y/o) and it’s causing us to fight. She lies constantly and tells her mother all these bad (and untrue) things about our house which her mom records. It makes me not want to speak with her. She also used to want to hang out with me and do stuff but has admitted that her mother tells her not so when she is with her dad, she acts weird.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: My father is a widower and also just got out of a destructive relationship. My father is from a time where the woman takes care of the man and he expects others to do the same. My mother was a good woman and she took care of my father until she passed almost 9 years ago.

2No Distortion

My husband’s issues have really begun taking its toll on our family. We’ve been married for thirteen years and from the beginning, I knew of his temper but figured since I had suffered from depression (due to childhood sex abuse) in the past, perhaps we both could assist each other in dealing with our mental health.

2No Distortion

From a teen in Germany: My loving and sweet boyfriend of 6 months happens to like a specific body type. on my request he’s shown me multiple times what that body he is attracted to looks like and I noticed that no matter if it’s a person in real life, a photograph or a drawing, all the figures look the same or very similar, while I don’t look anything like it.

2No Distortion

I met this friend on the first day of college freshman year (we are soon to be juniors) and it has become increasingly apparent that something is not right. My other friends actually sat me down to tell me they thought she was genuinely in love with me, but I thought they were just being dramatic. She has always been a little nuts (yelling at guys she doesn’t like, getting belligerently drunk, etc). I thought she was just a lot of fun and I didn’t mind be friends with someone a little out there. Everything changed when 4 of my best friends (including her, who was my best friend at the time) got an apartment together. It’s too hard to explain so let me just list things that have happened and are happening: – she screamed at guests we had over for being too loud and insulted them when she could have just asked for quiet (by the way she is the loudest person I know) – Recently, we had to take her to the emergency room when I got a call from my friend saying she was unresponsive and needed to go to the ER. When I showed up she started yelling to everyone to fuck off and to only let me near her when I wasn’t even the one at the time helping her – We went out one night and she got so angry at me for not wanting to go to the same club as her that she yelled at me in public – Every time I go out with her she drinks so much that I have to follow around and take care of her ALL night – she tells every person she meets that I am her best friend and that we are attached at the hip – She spent over 1k on me both my birthdays even though anyone who knows me knows I would NEVER want that – she constantly talks about how we will be each others bridesmaids – she follows me around for entire days and nags me constantly to hang out with her – she gets very jealous and angry when I have other friends. She has straight up bullied my new roommate since she moved in She has had an extremely hard life and I feel so guilty but I can’t do it anymore, help?

She has always been a little nuts (yelling at guys she doesn’t like, getting belligerently drunk, etc).

10Labeling

From a woman in Iran: I have found out that I have a really bad personality problem; here it is: When someone that I care about makes me angry repeatedly (for things like not answering my phone calls), I talk aggressively and bittingly to him/her. The result will be his/her anger and stop being kind with me. Then I feel ambivalent. On one hand, I’m sad and guilty because of my impolite talking and nagging; on the other hand, I believe that person is the one that made me mad and he/she deserved my rude words. At least I could show my anger and I now I feel catharcised.

On one hand, I’m sad and guilty because of my impolite talking and nagging; on the other hand, I believe that person is the one that made me mad and he/she deserved my rude words.

5Personalization

From the Arabian Gulf: My boss, also a “friend”, has – multiple times over the last couple years – insisted that first hand experiences of mine never happened. She will literally dig in her heels, turn pink and argue with me relentlessly that what I’m saying didn’t happen, despite it being my experience, her not being there, and the issue not being all that important. It’s infuriating. And when I stand my ground she doubles down on her argument, especially if there are staff or her family around. She’s never done it in front of HER friends.

2No Distortion

It has been around 1.5 years since we were in relationship. The decision was the result of his persistent efforts to help me at working every situation (we were in the same college and office too). Though he is not good at looks, a silent type of guy(unlike me), I considered him for hope for his improved life because of me,his nice family(As he told) and his nature. In the beginning, things were awesome, we used to roam across the city, visit temples, and be happy wherever we would go. But since 2-3 months, I began to feel, things have turned dull, because after knowing each other, we have nothing to discuss, sometimes, he doesn’t say a single work for minutes on phone. And when I complain, he says that silence speaks more than words, and he is happy with me. But this dullness and boredom made me depressed many times, specially the fact that he is suffering from many illnesses like dryness, obesity, very poor eyesight which I thought he would be enthusiastic to cure for me,but he didn’t try to make the things normal for me either. I was even worried to find his hair slowly falling out.All the day, I would keep worrying about all these problems, which would give me butterflies. Once I even felt bad when I found him giving more importance to his friends and telling me that it’s because I keep complaining to him about everything, he feels alone, and then he looks for friends. this made me feel even worse specially when he doesn’t call me when he is with them. Finally, time came when I told my parents about him. I called him home. My parents accepted him only for me, but also complained about his too silent nature, because sometimes, you need to speak.

All the day, I would keep worrying about all these problems, which would give me butterflies.

9Mental filter

I know I should seek help, and I’m currently seeing a therapist for my anxiety, but I tend to get violent thoughts. Like if I have a sharp object in my hand, I think of ways to kill people. I don’t want to nor think I would enjoy it at all, but I do think of it. I’m aware this isn’t normal and I was wondering if I really should seek help.

2No Distortion

After looking for work for almost 3 years I am become reluctant to put any more effort into this fruitless action. I feel the same way about pursuing any kind of relationship. I have no goals, dreams, or plans for the future. I’m also tired of hearing ” why don’t you go back to school?” from what ever person i decide to confide in. i cant go back because i cant get any student loans until i pay off the old one. Honestly i just want to walk out of the house with the clothes on my back and embrace the fact that i shouldn’t run away from my fate of dying on the street. I’m not even sure what i should ask.

After looking for work for almost 3 years I am become reluctant to put any more effort into this fruitless action. I feel the same way about pursuing any kind of relationship. I have no goals, dreams, or plans for the future.Honestly i just want to walk out of the house with the clothes on my back and embrace the fact that i shouldn’t run away from my fate of dying on the street.

7Overgeneralization

From the U.K.: Hi, I was raped seven years ago, but it took me a year to report it to the police as he threatened me not too. It did not go to court due to lack of evidence but he does have it on his criminal record. I see him a lot as we live in the same town and he just stares at me very angry look.

2No Distortion

Lately I’ve been feeling like nothing is going right in my life and I’m just too tired to deal with it. I go to boarding school and my relationship with my parents has been deteriorating because they limit my freedom a lot when I’m at home by not letting me go out and my mom especially manipulates me into doing things her way all the time. When things don’t go her way she sometimes blows up at me and yells at me calls me a failure and says she doesn’t want to talk to me or care for me. I’ll spend whole days just in my room and she’ll pretend I’m not there. These episodes have occurred every few months for my whole life but lately it’s been several times a month. I’ve started to keep aspects of my personal/academic life to myself because I just want to avoid this kind of situation. For example, I’m working on a research project that I’m very stressed about but I didn’t tell my mom because she would get stressed and we’d end up yelling at each other. I was also dating someone and I didn’t tell them because I didn’t want to get yelled at. But then about a month ago is when everything kind of fell apart. My boyfriend broke up with me because his personal life was also falling apart and he couldn’t commit to a relationship. Initially, I accepted this answer but later I couldn’t shake the suspicion that he was just lying to make me feel better and that he just didn’t like me anymore. That some things about me were off-putting to him. Then my research project just kept hitting dead ends while everyone else’s seemed to be progressing. Then a few days ago I accidentally caused an evacuation by burning Teflon plastic and creating highly toxic fumes in the lab. The teacher keeps bringing it up and I sometimes have to try not to cry when he does. This has made all my self-loathing and guiltiness and embarrassment worse and I feel like I’m failing academically and also failing as a person. Am I just bad at handling life? Or is it normal to feel like this?

Lately I’ve been feeling like nothing is going right in my life and I’m just too tired to deal with it. For example, I’m working on a research project that I’m very stressed about but I didn’t tell my mom because she would get stressed and we’d end up yelling at each other.

7Overgeneralization

From a young woman in the U.S.: My 14 year old brother is the issue. We as family understand that teens often go through this phase where they will get mad and not want to be with the family. Our issue is he spends all his time playing violent games on the laptop and not do homework or help out around the house. His grades are suffering, he refuses to make friends, and keeps to himself.

Our issue is he spends all his time playing violent games on the laptop and not do homework or help out around the house.

7Overgeneralization

My fiancé’ and I have been together for 4 and 1/2 years. We have been engaged for a little over a year and a half, and our wedding is in 18 days. Up until recently, everything was pretty good. I was always amazed at how functional we were compared to couples around us.

2No Distortion

I recently broke up with my ex of 4 years. The abuse was escalating and I had to get out of there. He has chocked me a few times (not to the point of passing out,) done lots of damage to things and my home, he somewhat kept me from my friends, he always blamed me for everything, and controlled who I talked to via phone or internet. He also has a big drug addiction. He wasn’t always this way. He was caring, loving, showed his emotions; made sure I had what I needed.

He has chocked me a few times (not to the point of passing out,) done lots of damage to things and my home, he somewhat kept me from my friends, he always blamed me for everything, and controlled who I talked to via phone or internet. He wasn’t always this way. He was caring, loving, showed his emotions; made sure I had what I needed.

7Overgeneralization

I’ve had chronic depression starting in childhood with an emotionally absent mother. I was recently diagnosed with PTSD/BPD by new therapist. Christmas marked the beginning of this debacle. which set up the disaster and now my BPD, etc is a Category 5 Tropical Storm. A CONTINENTAL DIVIDE now exists between my son and I has turned awakening my abandonment fears. His response is total silence (he refuses to investigate this new BPD thing) and has cut off any possibility to try to resolve this. Meanwhile ironically enough his abandonment of me over this is not imaginary. Left to my own devices I spend all my days since 1st of the year existing in a pattern of emotional turmoil I can’t take much longer. I alternate between feelings of inconsolable grief and abandonment into resentment and culminating in my anger exploding leaving horrible messages on his phone which increases the gap. If we had talked when this all began it would have never developed into the mega storm it is but now it has – he has made no effort to get insight into BPD – he has genuinely abandoned me. The anger eventually burns out leaving me numb then we start over again. Being ignored as though I don’t exist also fuels the flames. Suffice it to say that I don’t see a way out and I do not want to spend my life cycling between all these painful feelings. I want to be able to talk to him, acknowledge how a part of me knows the rage is wrong and help him understand the mechanics of BPD. But I cannot make him talk to me so he is never going to understand and I am doomed forever to the abandonment I feel. While he was supportive during 2 medial emergencies I experienced now I have to guess that because this alleged malady of mine is emotional he views it something i made up to to manipulate him. He’s withdrawn totally which only multiplies my feelings. Suddenly out ofere he’s gone. HOW DO I SURVIVE this? My warm/caring son is as cold as ice. He has no interest in what BPD is. My days consist of going thru the cycles over and over again, grief, hurt, anger, crying, numbness this is no way I want to live. Is there a way out other than just ending it all?

But I cannot make him talk to me so he is never going to understand and I am doomed forever to the abandonment I feel. While he was supportive during 2 medial emergencies I experienced now I have to guess that because this alleged malady of mine is emotional he views it something i made up to to manipulate him.

7Overgeneralization

From Turkey: Back in July I met a guy through a friend. He found me through my friend’s Facebook page. After 2 weeks he wanted to become a couple. He seemed to rush things. He invited me to a wedding on the 10th day of our relationship, wanted to go on holiday with me and talked to his mother and sister about me. Then he inteoduced me to his friends. I thought such things were too premature at this early stage. In the meantime, I had a feeling like he had no relationship before and that I was his first girlfriend.

2No Distortion

I have Bipolar Disorder and some anxiety issues that cause panic attacks when I get overwhelmed by people, noises, stress, worrying, etc. For some reason, I always think I am going to be harmed. When I was little I couldn’t watch the news because I would become upset and always think about the people who died.

I have Bipolar Disorder and some anxiety issues that cause panic attacks when I get overwhelmed by people, noises, stress, worrying, etc.

3Magnification

I have gone through the symptoms of Paranoid Personality disorder and my wife seems to be suffering from the same since last 13 years. she is 39 years old and is a house wife now. earlier she was working as a teacher. she is a mother of 3 kids. My questions is that how should family members behave with a patient of paranoid personality disorder and how can we save our children from being a victim of the same disease. what are the chances of getting them affected. My wife doesn’t trust anyone in my family and fights with everyone. she says that she is not suffering from any disease and thinks that i want to divorce her on this ground.

2No Distortion

I am currently in my first ever relationship, as I have always struggled with confidence issues and meeting people has been difficult for as long as I can remember. My boyfriend and I have been together for about six months. I am in my early twenties and he is in his mid-thirties, so there is somewhat of an age gap. He is a great partner and is funny, intelligent, and we have lots of similar interests.

2No Distortion

A few months ago, I started seeing a counselor for the first time at my college. The reality is, I should have seen a counselor a very long time ago but I was always reluctant too until a recent breakdown. My entire life, I’ve always felt very anxious around almost any social situation. I have always been extremely shy and struggle making friends. I assume people are thinking negative of me and won’t like me, therefore I may come off really distant and very difficult to get to know. I struggle trusting anyone, making it really hard for me to make friendships (or keep friendships of any kind). It causes me a lot of issues in my job and my professional performance because I lack self-confidence and fear being judged. The counselor seemed to agree that what I was explaining seemed a lot like social anxiety. Even going to see a counselor was extremely challenging even after multiple sessions, I was still feeling as anxious/shy since the first few sessions. It’s really hard for me to warm up to people (if not seemingly impossible even if I know them for years) even though the counselor was very kind and nice. I found therapy hard and became frustrated with myself, so I called it quits after like the 8th or 9th session. I did make some progress and learned a lot, so it wasn’t a total waste of time. But overall, I felt hopeless like things for me weren’t ever going to change. I’m able to “Challenge” my negative thoughts with more positive ones but it didn’t really change how I truly felt. So, I began doing some research online about SAD and came across the term “avoidant personality disorder”…the description seemed very similar to SAD and began to wonder what if I had APD? Then, I also learned that treating personality disorders can be very difficult and may not be curable but treatment may relieve some symptoms. It kind of made me feel hopeless because what if the reason I haven’t been able to be “free” from this is because I have APD? Or am I overreacting? I’m not a huge fan of labels but wondering if it’s common for a therapist to tell you if they diagnosed you or not? Mine didn’t really ever “diagnose” me, they did however tell me the therapy we did was CBT.

I assume people are thinking negative of me and won’t like me, therefore I may come off really distant and very difficult to get to know. But overall, I felt hopeless like things for me weren’t ever going to change.

8Mind Reading

From the U.S.: I’m a 12th grader in high school, and I’m having a relationship issue. I suffer from depression, with some symptoms of psychosis present. Furthermore, while I do not have an official diagnosis, it is generally believed by family and my school that I have aspergers. My teachers and counselor have been pressuring my parents for some time to seek a doctor, we don’t have the funds.

2No Distortion

From Iran: I am a PhD candidate of structural engineering. I have a proposal of marriage from a man who is a PhD of pharmacy and 35 years old. He is the faculty of a good university in my country. I think he suffers from depression. He does his works very slowly. He has so few friends and has not any special fun except listening to classic music and watching movie. He says that he wakes up easily by a weak sound at night.

I think he suffers from depression. He does his works very slowly. He has so few friends and has not any special fun except listening to classic music and watching movie. He says that he wakes up easily by a weak sound at night.

3Magnification

Hello, I am 22 years old, I suffer from bad anxiety and I’ve been terrified of developing schizophrenia all of my life, I went through a period of my life a few years ago where I had awful anxiety, and I would hear what sounded like police sirens inside my head from time to time, eventually when my anxiety lessened, the noise went away.

Hello, I am 22 years old, I suffer from bad anxiety and I’ve been terrified of developing schizophrenia all of my life, I went through a period of my life a few years ago where I had awful anxiety, and I would hear what sounded like police sirens inside my head from time to time, eventually when my anxiety lessened, the noise went away.

9Mental filter

Hi, I have been seeing the same therapist for about 4 years. She recently told me that she was increasing her fees, because she has needs too. I take a lot of trips, and she stated, I have clients who are always taking trips and do not pay their bill. I told her, I pay my bill. Then she said, if I dont increase your fee then I am enabling you.? And that I need to decide what is more important, therapy or trips. She also stated that she feels like she has to walk on eggshells with me, and that she needs time off. I always believed that therapist were healthy with appropriate coping skills. She seems to blame me for things, and when I bring something up, she denies it. I feel like she has been fake, and is suddently resenting me. I would have appreciated her being honest with me. All I said to her was, if she increases my rate then I will come every other week instead of weekly. And I told her that I felt like I was too dependent on her. I feel connected to her because I have shared soo much about myself to her, but I’m not sure I want to continue therapy with her. I originally went to her for substance abuse and it has been a long road to recovery. She probably feels discouraged. I tend to be brutally honest and perhaps that made her mad at me? Resentful that I am taking vacations and she cant. Anyways I am having hard time with this and cant stop thinking about the things she accused me of. Any insight, or advice would be deeply appreciated. Thanks.

I feel like she has been fake, and is suddently resenting meShe probably feels discouraged. I tend to be brutally honest and perhaps that made her mad at me? Resentful that I am taking vacations and she cant.

8Mind Reading

From a teen in the U.S.: Hi. I’m going crazy. Maybe 5 months ago I started to act strangely. I’ve become obsessive with things and I hurt myself when they go wrong. For example, I picked up what I thought was a seed off the floor and it was a bug. I jumped and it fell down the drain. I started obsessing with thoughts like “you know you’re a horrible person” and “if you can’t save a bug how can you expect to be seen as kind”. I tried hard to get it out but I couldn’t do it. I eventually turned on the tap and the disposal and made myself eat sludge out of the drain as a “punishment”.

For example, I picked up what I thought was a seed off the floor and it was a bug. I jumped and it fell down the drain. I started obsessing with thoughts like “you know you’re a horrible person” and “if you can’t save a bug how can you expect to be seen as kind”.

3Magnification

Hi. Before I start, I’d like to give some background. I’m 21, my “boyfriend” is 24, and I am/was in a long distance relationship. I met a young man through a cousin in January of 2010, and we kept in contact off and on until we saw each other again in July. After going on dates for about a month he asked me to be his girlfriend. It had been 5 years since he last had a girlfriend. At the end of August I went home. I only heard from him about five times after coming home, and in October communication stopped completely. My cousin told me that his phone was broke, which was true, but I didn’t see that as an excuse. My “boyfriend” and my brother were friends on a social internet site and I figured he could have emailed me or used my cousin’s phone.

2No Distortion

Well, ever since I was around 13, I’ve felt the urge to kill or seriously injure people. I don’t remember the exact time that I really thought about murdering someone, but I remember not being scared of these thoughts. They still don’t scare me. I honestly feel like I could do it. I haven’t told anyone about this, and I don’t think I will. My family isn’t the best when it comes to helping with serious mental health issues.

2No Distortion

After i broke up with a girl i was anxious and depressed and still in love. I was part of a healing group and had one to one healing where i told him everything about my love, fears, hopes. it was helping so i invited the girl along so he could help her. He started to divulge things to her i had said in confidence and pay her lots of attention. i had to stop going for a while but then asked him if he was seeing her. he said he was human but also he wouldnt do that. i couldnt ask her because she was always asking me to let go. five agonising months later, not knowing fully, she told me she was pursued by him and she eventually gave in. She got dumped after a week and he started seeing someone else from the group and i believe they are still together and happy, which is great. My ex was vulnerable, afterall it was a healing group. Apparantely, everything i told him about her on our healing sessions made him want her for himself. he took her away on a shaman retreat and one thing led to another. when he stopped it after the weekend he said she had too many issues for him. she never wanted him, she just went along with it but now knows she was duped and i feel so angry and hateful. Had they gone on and had a relationship i would stand back and be happy but we both feel so much worse and the lessons are vague. i told him my worst fear and he made it come true. he said he just reflected my fear in his action which is just the sort of garbage i would expect from him now i know his ego and intentions took over. if i thought he was a predator i would write something on his healing forum but i would have to back up my story which means going public with our names. he offends my sense of decency and has caused me so much emotional distress. i know i have to forgive him for my sake but there is acceptance and there is acquiescence, which means i will accept it but need to protest. do i let it go or dig it all up?

if i thought he was a predator i would write something on his healing forum but i would have to back up my story which means going public with our names. i know i have to forgive him for my sake but there is acceptance and there is acquiescence, which means i will accept it but need to protest.

6Should statements

I have severe Bipolar Disorder and am applying for disabality: I have sever bi polar disorder and it is not ideal for me to work and be around people in fear i may be so upset i will hurt them. i have been to my doctor may times for this and i have an appointment with a phycologist soon to help with my treat ment. i am taking 400mgs of Seroquel currently and it doesnt seem to be working…I applied for disability because bi polar is a disability and i need the help while im trying to be treated and focus on only that…do i have a chance of getting it? will i be okay

I have sever bi polar disorder and it is not ideal for me to work and be around people in fear i may be so upset i will hurt them.

4Fortune-telling

From the U.S.: A few years back, I went through the worst 3 plus years of my life. This was all without telling anyone, simply dealing with it – every second of the day. I was hearing voices, thousands times a day I would hear different statements, and I finally could not take it. I broke down, sent to the hospital emergency, and then Baker Acted for 5 days. Removal only if 3 expert psychiatrists, deemed me ready to leave. I was so desperate to get out of this depressing, unhealthy prison setting.

I was hearing voices, thousands times a day I would hear different statements, and I finally could not take it.

7Overgeneralization

From the U.S.: I have a daughter who does competitive Irish dance. From 8-12 she competed regularly and won consistently (13 now). When she hit the highest level within the sport, she started to not do as well. This sapped her confidence and in turn, her desire to compete. She has a natural talent that has gotten her to the place where she is. Now, she has to put in the work to compete against the girls at her level. If she did put in the work, she would dominate. But she doesn’t want to do that and I’m not sure if it’s because she’s lazy or is afraid of putting in the work and still losing. In reality, she still does well, but just not placing within the top 3 like she used to.

But she doesn’t want to do that and I’m not sure if it’s because she’s lazy or is afraid of putting in the work and still losing.

5Personalization

A few weeks my best friend (24 m) came over to visit for the weekend. My family look at this boy like another son, they love him and he even has keys to my mother’s house. (I live with my Dad) The first night -Saturday- nothing happened. But Sunday I woke up orgasaming and his hand was in my pants. I did not know what to do so I just moved his hand and kept a pillow between us for the rest of the night. The next weekend he came over again, but just for Saturday. This time I woke up and both my pants and his pants were missing. Not only that, but my panties had been removed as well (which I do not do no matter how hot I get under the covers..

2No Distortion

I have a 15 year old daughter who is lovely in many ways. She is talented and generally self-confident, but seems to be oblivious to social constraints about what is or isn’t appropriate to say. She speaks her mind with brutal honesty — think of a petite Dr. Gregory House. Most people who have known her for a long time are accustomed to her acerbic nature and take it with a grain of salt.  Some people find it amusing/entertaining, but her inability to filter her comments is starting to cause problems in some of her peer groups. How can I steer her toward more socially appropriate behavior? (age 48, from US)

2No Distortion

Since I was about 16 years old I’ve had these “spells” where it’s impossible for me to control my emotions. They come on suddenly and with absolutely no triggers whatsoever, although for hours to days before they happen I’ll sometimes have uncomfortably high levels of energy–I’ll feel either obnoxious and silly (but in a kind of desperate way, if that makes sense) or I’ll be really productive and jittery. Both of these high energy feelings are unsettling, maybe because I normally almost never have high levels of energy. The “spells,” “episodes,” whatever they are, involve extreme guilt and disgust with myself–but it’s a very visceral feeling and it’s overwhelming. I feel trapped inside my disgusting self and like I’m willing to do anything to escape it. I feel incredibly agitated and yet trapped at the same time–like I want to move or do something but I can’t. I also just feel extremely empty and sad–like, I’m filled with this overwhelming emotion but other than that I’m hollow. I feel so desperate and so unhappy and sick and like I hate myself so much–but it’s such a powerful physical feeling that it’s hard to describe with words because it’s a feeling and not a thought. I sob uncontrollably during these episodes (they usually last a few hours although they occasionally last longer) I’ve definitely been suicidal during these periods, but it’s not so much a conscious desire to kill myself than it is a need to escape how I’m feeling. I’m just afraid sometimes that since I’m not really thinking during these times that I might do something to myself–especially since I think during these times that I don’t deserve to get help or that I’m not worth disturbing people by calling them.

I feel trapped inside my disgusting self and like I’m willing to do anything to escape it.I’m just afraid sometimes that since I’m not really thinking during these times that I might do something to myself–especially since I think during these times that I don’t deserve to get help or that I’m not worth disturbing people by calling them.

10Labeling

From a young woman in the U.S. I have been dating the same person for almost three years, I recently find myself getting angry because I feel i am not completing my goals as fast as I would like to and in return blaming it on the relationship, for the this reason: If i worked more overtime I could reach my goal faster but don’t want to because then I would miss him a lot and i would be miserable about seeing him less, where as when i was single i had no issues working as much as I had to, in order to obtain my goals because i had nothing to look forward to when I came home.

I have been dating the same person for almost three years, I recently find myself getting angry because I feel i am not completing my goals as fast as I would like to and in return blaming it on the relationship, for the this reason: If i worked more overtime I could reach my goal faster but don’t want to because then I would miss him a lot and i would be miserable about seeing him less, where as when i was single i had no issues working as much as I had to, in order to obtain my goals because i had nothing to look forward to when I came home.

3Magnification

From an 18 year old young man in the US: hi 2 years ago i had injury in my knee and since then i started reading about any pain i get .. i thought i had a heart attack and went to the er like 4 times and then thought i had cancer and did so many tests and visited many doctors and even did colon test to find if i had colon cancer cuz my mom had it and im worried about my health alot and my mom and dad i rlly worry about their health speically my dad

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: I am writing to you because the animosity between my family and my boyfriend has been taken to the next level and even involved the police. My dad and brother have always disliked my boyfriend because they think he is disrespectful and irresponsible. My mom loves him because she sees the sweetheart side of him and knows how happy he makes me.

2No Distortion