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The cruelest thing you can do to a person is give them hope. And then snatch it away.

So true. Every time I think I've made a friend, a few weeks/months later, life is like, haha, gotcha! At this point I don't like trying. I want to cut off everyone (not that I have to try that hard, lol) and just be alone, but then when loneliness gets to me, it hurts physically and I hate that.

Do any of you experience peak depression in the morning?. My whole life I thought I was just *really* not a morning person, but it turns out wanting to die upon waking is part of the diagnostic criteria for melancholic features. I always tell myself it'll ease up as the day goes on and it usually does.

Well I can say that I think it's really good that it gets better throughout the day. For me it's the opposite, my mornings are bleh. As the day goes on into the night I feel better, and before bed time I feel depressed. I think everyone is just different and maybe getting your day started gets rid of some mental worries and anticipation

Feeling really bad. All I want in life is to be loved and I'm never good enough I'm never worth anything to anymore

I'm sorry. I've been in and out of a relationship for years now. She's loving and considerate and great in so many ways.. but there's no commitment. Actually the space between us has grown over the years. I guess part of it is that I'm a bit of a basket case and it can be emotionally taxing. I don't even want to put her through all of that for the rest of her life. But at the end of the day I just want to go home and share my life with her.. and she's not there. She's done so much for me but it makes me feel so unwanted that this is the end of the line. Like I'm just a burden and despite all the love she has to offer, I'm just too screwed up for it to work. I feel so lonely and so stupid for everything I've done to turn her away.

Every time I call the suicide help line I just hang up.. I just feel like I can't say it out loud, how I feel and how I just want it all to end.

Are you afraid they will critizise you?

Death death death. ###why am i so obsessed with DEATHHHHH

Define obsessed what do you think about?

Summer BBQ and no one comes. Free ribs and booze and I have Js prerolled and yet all but one person is either a no show or forgot. Thanks world, thanks depression, FML.

who wouldnt want to show up to that?? they lame

People are moving on, and living a good life, and me, am stuck here doing nothing.. I feel so isolated, and alone.

Know the feeling. My friends are married, they have kids, have homes of their own. Meanwhile, I'm still at home with my parents wondering what the fuck happened to my life at 31? But as others have said, Facebook is pretty much a crock of shit. I recently decided to out myself for being the manic depressive I am. Some people were kind about it, others pretended they gave a shit (more likely for the look how sympathetic I am play card.) Recently I've been pretty out with my highs and lows. My highs get a lot of love but as soon as I show my lows, I notice a massive difference in support. It's almost like they go out of their way to avoid the lows and reality of it. So yeah, Facebook is pretty much a crock of shit and it really does expose to you who people really are.

Every body know i want to kill myself but nobody care. A few month ago, i told to my mum the fact that i whas thinking of killing myself, and she didn't even react to it, so now i'm just lost on my way to sucide (Sry for my bad english)

Maybe she just didn't know how to react to it... or just in shock. i think you should see a therapist because it seems that you're a danger to yourself or you could talk to a close friend about your suicidal thoughts. There's more to life than people's validation about you, trust me. It really gets better overtime. Bad thoughts will come and it will pass, you need to find support of others to overcome it.

I put away the dishes, vacuumed my rug, made my bed and finished my homework today. It's the little victories sometimes.

That's an accomplishment for most of the population to be honest. You had a productive day, be proud of yourself.

im in a contsant cycle of going from''i want to improve myself'' to ''fuck life i just want to sit home be miserable and do nothing''. i hope im not the only one feeling this way

You arent. I can only speak for myself here but I sometimes get stable enough to motivate myself to lessen my consume of electronics and be productive instead and read, tidy up and continue learning the language ive been working on. However those ups usually dont last long cause its easy to trigger me into collapsing again. The only way out is gettin a potent therapist or the right pills I guess

why do girls always reject me?. why do girls always reject me for some confident guy,do girls want me to become a maniac?stand outside there window with my pants down and dick hanging out waiting to rape them?,do girls want want me to rape them?

There is also another factor that you sometimes dont notice, how you are perceived by others by body language. Im a really shy introverted person, but i had multiple people telling me that i came over as real angry threatening dude with a frown on my face and i never noticed this in my entire life. So, you need to be confident in yourself, showing through body language that you are a good guy to hang out with, i simply cant say how to do it, but thats one way to explain this.

Why does depression at times, feel Addicting?. Almost like a blissful state of *This isn't so bad* then, in time your slowly thrusted back into your numb colorless world

Cognitive dissonance: when thoughts and actions diverge, you change your thoughts to match your actions. In this case, the action is initial actions you take or take because of your depression. We want to justify why we did that, so we come up with reasons to explain the behavior in terms that are wrong but palatable.

It's my birthday today.. I'm 19 today and nobody has wished me a happy birthday or anything. I've been alone for an incredibly long time and I've been made to feel guilty and miserable by my own family on my birthday. I'm on my way to work just now and I've already slipped on some ice and hurt my back. I hope you all have a better day than me so far. Cheers.

Happy birthday. I hope you do something fun after work.

Why do I want to feel sad?. I have been doing better with managing my suicidal thoughts, but now I gained some sort of longing for them and the feelings attached to them to return. Trying to understand why.

It might be because it's all we've ever known and were scared that anything else will be worse

Bye. I tried, but I do it anymore.

Madara, there's people on here who will listen to what you have to say and how you feel and who can try to relate and will care. Let us know if you want to talk.

Raging again. Here I go again. My family has done nothing to me, but my nerves are crawling out of my body. I just want them to realize and care about what is going on with me. Back to bed I go.

You should talk to them

The only problem with death is that i wont be there to enjoy it... Yeah i just want to feel serennity and peace.

You know that feeling when you wake up in the morning and realise that you don't have to get up for another hour, so you go back to sleep? That's how I imagine death to feel. Just a peaceful slipping away. No pain, no fear. Just peace and rest. I'm almost ready for it to be honest.

I'm only planning to out live my parents, and everyday I think about and plan out the most painless way to go. At the same time I don't want my parents to pass away. But I want to go and I don't want them to be sad.

I have definitely felt that. It still recurs. Though since you know youre going to stick around a while longer, shittiness and all, might as well try a few crazy ideas to change your brain to like living, yeah? Might not work, but I don't imagine you have other big plans. I'm working with a psychiatrist to try a few treatments (medications). I talk to a therapist. I make myself visit the few rare friends who get it. I sometimes go running. Some days I don't hate living. Some days I do. But I at least want to know I tried everything before I leave.

Procrastination. Anyone else just lay in bed sometimes. You want to get up but you can't convince yourself, or you want to do something like go onto your computer and you cant bring yourself to do it.

I believe that is called exhaustion, mental or physical. Could also be lack of interest due to depression.

My therapist: don’t drink or do drugs Me the next week: so I drank and got high. Love a daily dose of self-sabotage

A therapist should discourage anything that fuels your depression/illness

Am I alone because I'm depressed, or am I depressed because I'm alone?. It's been so long, I don't remember anymore...

for me i think its a little of both

sort of wanna end it all. idk anymore. i cant do this longer...

Sorry to hear that, feel free to PM if you want to.

Making my bed makes me feel like I have my life under control. I but at least it looks like I do.

I can't get anything done if my bed isn't made. It's the first thing I do every morning.

I hate myself. I absolutely hate myself I hate the way I look I hate the way my body looks I hate my brain I hate myself I hate myself I absolutely fucking hate myself

Could be worse. Hate is still an emotion.

How long did your unrequited love experience last?. Just wondering when this feeling is gonna go away

I have never been in love but i did like someone that like me back. The feeling lasted after we stopped communication about 3 months and i was over it

i dont even know what i feel. or why i feel it, all i know is it feels like a pit in my chest and makes me want to die. how the fuck do you fix an unidentifiable feeling.

I don't have any feeling inside my chest, ever as far as I can remember. I mean literally, I'm not making some silly metaphor. I'm trying to figure out whether that might be a medical problem, or maybe it's normal and people just talk in metaphors all the time.

I just watched my dad fucking wave a stick at my mom and threaten to beat her and shut her out of the room.. They were all friendly a few minutes later. What the fuck is wrong with people? I'm in a nightmare.

Everything is wrong with people.

The psych ward. I just had a terrible dream or waking nightmare that I was back in the syche ward Oh god it was so real, physical and emotional

Hey, sorry that you had to deal with that. Those dreams that you discern from reality are the worst... is this something that you frequently deal with?

Do you ever want to disappear?. Leave everything behind and start again somewhere else.

Definitely have thought like that for a long time.

i dont want to risk staying alive if staying myself forever is one of the possibilities. i dont want to be alone for the rest of my life but i dont want to fuck people over

How will you fuck people over?

I just want to stop living. My life sucks,school sucks,I have no friends,and my parents tell me stupid for being just floating through every day,with YouTube and.I want to kill myself but just pluck up the courage to make that step.

i feel very much like you. id like to give you advice but im just as broken so ill just let you know that i feel with you here. maybe that will help.

I hate being socially inept.. I want to interact with my friends but I just can't hold a conversation no matter what it is... watching them give up on you because you're so dull is a very painful fate

I feel you're pain OP. When it comes to texting holding a conversation is like rocket science.

Does anyone else deactivate social media when depressed?. I often deactivate Facebook and Instagram when I feel depressed because I hate seeing how good everyone's lives are compared to mine, and I like deactivating social media because it gives me space away from everything, and I can be left alone.

Yeah, I find social media really mentally unhealthy. I already have a bad habit of comparing myself to people, and social media just encourages people to do so. I find for me it's better to just not have it, but then on the other hand people think you're weird or lame if you don't at least have Facebook. I hate people so much.

I love to live in a world. where homosexuality is a disease but mental disorders don't exist.

Homosexuality hasn't been considered a disease for awhile now O_o

The only joy in life i get is cuddling with prostitutes. the only time i feel human. Normal girls even look at me. Girls hate shy guys.

There are nice confident people, equating those things are why you can't get laid. Source: I can't get laid.

There is literally nothing anyone can say to me that would convince me to not kill myself today. All I've ever wanted is for someone to convince me that life is worth living. But NO ONE can fucking do it. Life is really that fucking bleak.

I'm not going to lie to you and say there's a point in life. Because I don't think life has any point at all. The only think I can say is if you have friends, maybe you can talk to them. If you don't have any friends or know anyone, then everyday is a living hell..

Why can't suicide be easy ?. I feel like if suicide was painless and quick, I would have done it a long time ago.

I feel like it's a paradox. People would call you or I selfish, but who are they to assign life or the absence thereof. Many people can't relate to such feelings of loneliness and unworth. But for those who can, being called selfish for suicidal thoughts, makes it all the more confusing of a situation. It also shows you who really cares, cause calling you selfish is just choosing the victim route, for themselves, which is fucked. While some may call it manipulation. Whatever the name, it's hardly sympathetic, and isnt even close to empathetic. Which, empathy, is what this world is lacking. A partnership society would support each other regardless of their stance or tradition. But, we live in a male dominated, monotheistic world. People suck. The only thing we can do is help them. So that's why I think suicide is hard; you're not helping anyone.

Does anybody go sleep and wish all their problems just vanish before they wake up?. It's the only thing left that gives me hope.

Yep and they never do

I don't want a partner or even just friends because I want the freedom to kill myself, with the least number of people affected.. This way, it's only my parents and siblings who will be saddened.

I used to imagine hoping myself out of existence, because wishes usually fail. In any case, I'm just recently starting to appreciate how all our lives are connected or rather it's a delusion to think there was never a connection to begin with, else itd be different. Anyway, it's ok to take some isolation to figure things out, but life's like riding a bicycle.

Anyone else just feel so lonely?. Every night I go to bed and I just feel sad and alone. No one loves me no one cares. Idk I just feel so cold and empty like nothing can warm me up, even if under tons of blankets.

I feel the same. On my lucky days i just happen not to think about it too much. Other days it's just there the entire time. It's tiring.

I feel like there's no particular reason to my depression. But then life decided to add a few.

There will very likely be a reason to your depression as depression doesn't really start from nothing, sweetheart

why am i depressed?. why am i depressed? ​

Does you happiness rely on other people's behavior?

I text my friends too much. Do they get annoyed? Dunno but they seem to have better things to be doin

terrified of annoying somebody to the point that they just leave me

is it OK to be average?. I hate being average at everything it fuels my depression!

Average is great! At least you don't suck.

Where do you go when home doesn't feel like home. Please, please take me away from this place...

Yes. had better nights sleep in my car than my bed sometimes. Find a secluded spot, read a book/watch a movie, write in a journal.

I would never be able to kill myself, but i wish i would just die in my sleep. anyone else feel like this?

All the time, I wouldn't want to kill myself. But it wouldn't bother me if I didn't wake up tomorrow.

I don't Know If This Is Normal Or Not. I always feel like i'm a loser and not worth people's time is that considered a form of depression ?

not really a form of depression, but it can definitely be a symptom of it. Feeling that you are worthless, a burden, a failure, are all very common to those suffering from depression. What separates it from simply having low self esteem, which many people do, are whether or not you have the other symptoms associated with depression. Things like lack of energy and interest, hopelessness about the future, difficulty sleeping/eating/focusing, suicidal thoughts; experiencing these things on a consistent basis for weeks/months/years is definitely indicative of some sort of depression. Take some time and think about how you feel and been causing it, Do some research into your thoughts and what others say about it. If you decide you need or want help, be afraid to reach out to others and communicate your troubles. I wish you the best of luck, you got this.

How do I know how to decide between seeing a therapist or a psychologist or a life coach ?? Please help. I am a 22 year old male, I work 2 part time jobs, I suffer from depression and loneliness and social anxiety and low self esteem, I don't know what to do with my life and what to do with myself. Which category should I seek help from ?

Hi, I hope you are doing okay today. If you have never scene anyone, I would recommend a therapist like a LCSW (licensed social worker). In my experience, the type of care you get is less important than the connection you feel with the provider. So I over think it too hard. Instead, put that energy towards finding the right person. Which means calling lots of places, talking to a lot of people and listening to your gut. Have a good one

Will she give me a diagnosis?. Hey! I will see my psychologist next week for the 4th time and I'm curious. Will she ever give me a diagnosis or a detailed speech about what's wrong with me? because if not I know I will feel like shit I will just think that I don't deserve help.

If she doesn't, you should ask about it. Talk at the beginning of the session and say I would really like to know your assessment of what's going on with me. I feel like it would really help me to know what you think, and what you think would help me get better

How do you guys deal with family stress when you're in a bad place?. I'm having a lot difficulty with this.

I swear, if people didn't have families, there would be a lot less depression in this world. I guess it really depends on the type of family stress. Can you realistically put some distance between yourself and the stress? Or is it something that you have to resolve?

new years day, feeling a lil hopeful, immediately get scammed.. :) was a mistake not to kill myself last christmas.

> [...] immediately get scammed. How so?

Im starving.. I fell too anxious and depressed to eat :(. Its painful, my mother left money to buy pizza for us, but dressing up, taking a shower then driving 15 minutes to get pizza seems impossible.. Typo, feel instead fell.

Maybe try and cook some noodlesor rice at home for now. Oatmeal? Potatos? Beans? There should be something edible in your house that doesn't require you to go outside.

26 year old male, living at home, low income job, in school (parents paying for it), want to get married to girlfriend who graduates with nursing degree in 5 months. I feel like a deadbeat

Just fucking do it. what could go wrong. Make your life about being grateful for everything and you will not be disappointed. Stay busy. don't let yourself get lost in anything but her. make loving her your first and for most job and you will never be disappointed or sad.

Am now realizing how bad my depression is. Every moment I'm away from my computer I feel the dread sink in my chest. I remember what's wrong with my head. I remember the physical pain I have. I remember *reality*. My mind is blank and I can't think properly, so please forgive whatever this is.

I feel you. Realizing how depressed you really are is pretty scary. Best of luck with all your struggles.

Feeling guilty about living. I feel guilty whenever my parents fight each other, like it's my fault for being born; I feel as if I've given them nothing but trouble from the beginning. I don't ask for almost anything at all either, because then I'd feel like even more of a burden.

Is your family having money trouble?

I broke down crying in my room but I stopped because I realized crying wasn't gonna help me cure my depression. If only tears could show the way and sorrow could build a staircase

Hmm. Crying is just a kind of release valve for me body. It cries when it can't take anymore. Trying and failing to help myself is a permanent thing before that.

Does anyone else get a kind of restless anxiety? How do you deal with it?. One aspect of my depression seems to be an inability to sit down and focus on anything. I have a constant level of anxiety and A short attention span. My interest in things dies very quickly. Has anyone dealt with this and found a way around it?

When I watch films.Unable to concentrate on anything else,almost unable to take rest.

My inability to wake up for class might make me drop out, and I'm scared and don't know what to do. Help. I can wake up for work and for other things. I get over 8 hours of sleep, but I just can't manage to wake up for class. Any help would be amazing.

Is it an alarm problem or a I don't want to go so I just go back to sleep because fuck it what's the point in going problem? Most campuses offer free counseling so if you're concerned that this is a personal issue I would check that out.

.. Every day I take a step away from the old me. I want her back.

I can't decide if the old me is worse than the new me. At least back then I was more oblivious.

People keep saying we should fight our problems no matter what. but why?? What's the purpose of doing that?

That's the million dollar question. But I'm only fighting my problems because I'm scared that if I die I would hurt people

I hope reincarnation is a thing.. There's so many other kinds of people I'd rather be.

All I want and need after I move on from this life is to be Omnipotent. It's something I obsess over because I want to experience true freedom and true peace for eternity! I just want to be a God and play in my own sandbox.

Relief. Has someone got a recipe for Relief from an attack? Mine come more often atm and a way to ease them would rly come in handy

Hey bud. You're right but... don't feed the trolls.

Anyone else feels normal after getting really drunk?. Its like theres a part of my brain that's constantly generating negative thoughts and clouds my mind, and alcohol just shuts that part up.

Same. I wonder what my life could be like if I existed at the level I'm at after a few drinks.

I'm so ready to die. There is nothing for me in this life

but how can you play sims when you're dead? jokes aside, don't do anything okay, calm down. life will bring beauty, hang on.

Today as I was walking home I stopped to lay on the grass for a while. It was nice. Just a reminder for everyone to get away from the electronics and just enjoy nature once in a while.

I try to do that at least once a week. If its too cold outside then i just lay on a carpet, or take a really long bath.

Fuck it. Everything sucks. No one understands. So peace the fuck out.

I know the feeling of people not understanding, but is there absolutely nothing that doesn't suck? Like there is nothing that would lift your spirits, if only for a day?

What do you do every day when you're suffering depression?. I really wanna know how other people live their life. I know myself too much but have no clue what depression is like to others. Thanks.

I tend to go back to sleep over and over, and I eat at dinner time. spend the nights playing video games and then I oversleep. I need a balance of alone time and time with friends to start feeling like myself again, and if I get that balance wrong I can meltdown. I tend to downplay my problems to the people around me and upplay them to strangers. For example, inflate things for the sake of a conversation with some crisis volunteer or something, just to get some free sympathy and support that I have to feel weird about later because I see that person again. But, if a friend asks me how doing, my first reaction is to reply I have good friends so they call me out on this. I self sabotage by missing appointments or shutting out natural light. If cold, thirsty, hungry or uncomfortable, I ignore it and let myself suffer. I know getting better when I start doing certain things for myself. If I make myself some tea or get more blankets or sit somewhere other than my bed, I tell myself because I care about myself and want to feel better. I have physical pain associated with depression, usually I feel an ache in my arms and legs. When I have the energy I stretch to alleviate it. This also helps me feel better. I have to be conscious of whether I have the energy to do something, because if I force myself I could get overwhelmed and just sink further down. had to learn to say no to people when what they ask of me is more than I can provide without suffering later. But, for the most part, learned my depression will leave when good and ready. been going downhill for two months and had a meltdown a few nights ago so been thinking a lot about what I really need to get through these times. These depressed phases tend to last 4-6 months for me so still got a long way to go. This my first rodeo, though, prepared. learned that there are plenty of little things I can do that feel like self care. Self care is not always an elaborate bath with essential oils and red wine. To me self care is getting up to make a cup of tea, spending a couple minutes stretching, or ordering food when hungry instead of waiting until everything is closed and starving. It have to make you feel better all at once, but all those little things add up, and it means more when you put conscious value on it. will stretch so my body hurt so much, and I do this because I care about feeling I say to myself. I meant for this to be short...... and then it Hang in there.

I think I’ll run away either weeks before I’m 18 or afterwards. I want to runaway from my toxic father. I have a question my highschool diploma though. If not there to pick up my diploma what happens? Will I just never get my diploma? Does this mean I go to college or what? I might sound stupid but just really lost

Maybe you can get the diploma mailed to one of the family members place of work? He probably won't know who it was mailed to exactly and if he tries anything he may get kicked off of the property? Not sure just trying to throw some ideas around.

Letting depression take over your life and making it utterly worthless is easier than fighting it.. Realized that now. But I feel like that's obvious.

I'd rather be down forever than be in a roller coaster of emotion. I know that once I am happy, I will be sad again. The fall is just too painful. I'd rather embrace this sadness forever.

anyone else feel guilty for being happy?. I think that feeling forces me to be depressed again.

I can't remember the last time I was happy, seriously. But I think I understand you. You are so used to being depressed like it's your normal state of being? And then you can feel this tiny bit of happiness and it feels strange, like you don't deserve it? I think you do deserve it.

Skipped class today and feel like shit. Everyone in class prolly hates me anyways

Nope, humans are naturally apathetic. If they noticed you're gone, it was likely a passing thing. You're golden trust me.

I’m so fucking tired.. Just of everything. I want to take a nap and never have to wake up. What a fucking dream that would be.

take a nap with you if it meant never wake up. Do you believe there is a point to living besides to die?? Perhaps you could dream about that? A new life, a better life. Where there is a clear purpose.

Got some help today. And by help I mean I went in there, she said oh you have suicidal thoughts? To which I answered yes, and basically it ended quickly after that with a Here's a prescription for prozac. Have a nice day

Yah professionals don't give a fuck. Pisses me off when someone says 'go see a therapist' -- no bitch I need some love because I'm broken from an abusive past, bullying, and that the fact is no one wants to do or associate anything with me if I reveal my true self... Are you gonna take the Prozac?

I'm not good at this whole Being human thing.. But I'm going to start trying a bit more.

Me too I'll help others,plant trees or something.Perhaps its others happiness that will make me a bit happy too

Not good enough to be depressed?. Does anyone else ever feel guilty because their problems aren't as big as other people's problems so they shouldn't be depressed? I feel this heaps and it just makes me feel worse, feel like I'm stuck in between.

As someone said here previously, depression doesn't care who you are, where you are from, what you have or don't have. Even if you don't have serious problems, depression makes you feel like you're carrying all the problems of the world. It's true btw, there are people who are disabled, blind, deaf and still be happy, I don't have any of these problems, yet feel shit most of the time, and that makes me feel *guilty*..

Hi there. Sometimes when laughing really hard about something super funny, the laughter suddenly turns into crying. not just laughter tears, but tears of sadness. like a switch turning the laughs to real sad tears. Why does this happen?

Depends. If you are a girl it could be your monthly breakdown.

Not sure which is more depressing : looking ahead in life or looking back at the past. I dont want to be old. I dont want to grow. I just want to remain a child forever. Just innocent, gullible, carefree child.

the two are combined. The happy moments in the past breaking my heart while I have nothing to look forward to. No hope no prospects.

im sad.. im so sad.because of my situation.im listening to music.

This a huge troll..check his post history.

Is it stupid to seek a therapist, even thought you have a gut feeling you are going to kill yourself anyways?. I know it's stupid. I just want to hear what you guys think.

no, never. seeking a therapist is supposed to help you stop thinking like that. i think its good to seek a therapist, especially if you're highly suicidal.

I thought about paying an escort just to have a conversation. It's a good idea, don't even lie

Whaddup Holden! Also that's what a therapist is for, they just don't dress as sexy and wont blow you while you cry

Couldn't go through with killing myself, where do I go now?. As soon as i starting breathing in water, I decided I wanted to live. Now I'm here. What am I supposed to do with this meaningless existence? I try and try and try. I work hard at everything. It doesn't seem to matter, there is just a void always looming every single day of my life. I don't want to live, I don't want to die. Maybe Earth really is hell, except there is no heaven.

isn't this me in a bubble

Homeless and lost. I'm a mess I've always hated life I feel so empty

Where are you in the world?

Break even.. Do you think my partner whom broke up with me because of depression is feeling as hurt as I am right now? My former partner seems to be doing very well.

Because of your depression or your partners? My ex broke up with me because of hers. At the time she said she still loved me but needed to get better (really true, she was a nutcase). We recently talked after a few months of NC and her getting leveled out on anti-depressants. Her hurt was not the same as mine. Her emotions were flat-lined. Anhedonia. The sadness, anger, frustration, confusion, despair that I felt are emotions she was incapable of feeling. I know this because I was severely depressed myself years ago. Even now since she is on SSRI's, and with it being months later, I don't think her hurt is even close to what mine was. I think her hurt is more in regret. I honestly doubt she will ever truly hurt over this breakup - by the time she's off the meds and capable of feeling those raw emotions again, it will probably be a total of 1-2 years since the breakup. She'll only have to deal with regret - if even that. Of course some cynical side of me wants her to feel what I did. I want her to grieve the loss of our relationship like I did. I want her to think about what we had, let those good memories fill her with the positive emotions we had together, and have them followed up by sadness over the realization she lost it. But when I really think about it, I know I don't want that to happen. She cried enough when she started sinking lower into depression. The outbursts, the frustration, the fear of losing me. I remember how much that happened. She hurt too, it just happened for months before the breakup, where mine was after.

What should my 2 hobbies be?. I know who I am anymore or what I want to be.Choose **1.** Photography **2.** Make Edits **3.** Animation **4.** Drawing **5.** Rapping **6.** Learning more English words What should my 2 hobbies be? Edit:I am an Outcast with no friends & depressed

Photography, definitely. It will get you out in the world and expose you to so much in your pursuit of beauty and aesthetic. I don't know what you mean by make edits, so I can't really recommend that. Drawing might also be fulfilling for you, especially on rainy days when you don't want to go out with the camera. Although be warned, it can be extremely frustrating when you can't just translate your mind to the paper and are stuck building rudimentary skills.

The procrastination. It feels like I'm stuck with it forever, or at least until I'm not depressed.. I'm sick of what it's doing to me. Help

This is me right now. I've lost all interest in the work I'm doing, and I have trouble finding the will power to force myself to do it.

Asking girl out ended just as I expected... Didn't happen unfortunately, she was already taken.. But she did say (in a very real way) that if she were not with her current bf that she would date me. That was nice to hear :) but still gonna feel the depression for a little while after today..

I can't decide if I would feel like crying a bunch after that or not

Im a deeple confused and flawd person. And i hate myself for it everyday

We all are, and that's ok.

I don't even know what to say anymore.. Joined a gym the couple weeks ago and I go almost everyday. That hasn't helped either, usually cry on my way home or get so angry and then cry. FML

:( sounds like you got some heavy shit weighing you down, feel free to pm me if you want to vent

Gym anxiety.. I've heard that exercising regularly helps deal with depression. But, I feel too anxious to go to the gym to exercise. Any tips on how I can deal with this?

There are judgment free gyms out there such as Planet Fitness. Alternatively, you can buy your own gym equipment (e.g., dumbbells, resistance bands, etc.) / videos (e.g., P90X, Insanity) and work out at home. Exercising has definitely helped me with depression, but for me, it wasn't a magic cure. Exercising did bring many other benefits as well though, including health benefits, physical appearance benefits, confidence benefits, etc. So I highly recommend it

I'm very tired. I think I'd just like to lie down

Same. I just want to sleep and never wake up.

I used to cry everyday, now I don't... because I'm on welbutrin. and it sucks, because no matter how awfully sad i get, i cant let out the tears, im in hell...

I'm on the same meds, and I just wanted to ask how long it took for you to start feeling the effects.

It gets better over time. Biggest fucking lie I've ever heard

It's true in certain contexts. When you're at the lowest point of depression? Yes, it's going to get better. Depression, overall? Probably not going anywhere. Life? No promises. Could get better or worse.

Can I even consider family as family anymore?. I tried hanging myself a 2 weeks back, and my parents just stood there and watched. I failed, because the hook I attached the rope onto in the ceiling detached and I fell. My parents laughed and went to sleep a few minutes later, while I stayed awake the entire night. Can I even consider them family anymore?

Is there anywhere else you can go? A shelter or a friend's house or move in with a sibling or something? :(

I'm pathetic. My life is pathetic and has no meaning.

All meaning is made up. Maybe find solace in the fact you are just valuable/invaluable as anything else: Doves, cows, trees, minerals, other humans, stars. Try to see what about your life you hate so much, specifics, and try to change those things. PLay with things you are scared to do, do things that will make you feel better about yourself and your life, read positive mantras, read books that make your mental concept of the world expand. Force yourself onto new experiences. I think with time one's self loathing can be softened. After all the self loathing didnt come from you but from other's, from the environment. Babies dont hate themselves.

Any tips for improved self esteem?. My self esteem is honestly so low it may as well not exist. Any help on improving it would be great.

When my depression was at its worst, I was lost as to what would make me feel better. I thought about what the kid version of me would think was impressive if the adult version of me actually did it. I remembered I'd always been fascinated by the seemingly impossible idea of doing a triathlon. I signed up for an Olympic distance one (way way less than an Ironman but still seemed like an almost impossible feat for me at the time) and 6 months later, I crossed the finish line. It felt good to complete and it felt good to be healthier than I'd ever been. Being fit and healthy is going to help manage depression, (/r/eood and /r/fitness are both great places) but maybe that's not your bag. Can you think of any goal that you have now (or one you can resurrect from the past) that you KNOW you'd feel great about completing?

When you've been suicidal for a long time, you start to understand that it's not that easy... I fucking want to kill myself but everytime I think about how I failed the previous time and how this method will be pointless. I miss the old me that would've tried to jump in front of a train. Kind of a funny thought relate ?

I find myself theorizing about suicide pretty often (never actually tried ) and I always wonder what would be the best way : I live in Italy so I can't get access to a gun hanging or cutting my wrist sound super painful and u read about the guys that have to clean after people trow themselves in front of trains and I don't want to be a dick

I'd like to return or possibly exchange the gift of life. I think mine might be defective.

Ah r/depression the only sub positive comments are downvoted to shit

What do you want to stop?. I need everything to stop. People Life.

Over thinking and running away from myself.Or everything because I don't know what would be better for me.

Why must everything be so difficult. Why must every little thing be so hard. Why must I constantly fight against my own brain. Why couldn't we have been friends instead. I don't suppose.. Whatever. Why must everything be so hard..

Because life is not easy and its horrible but you cannot have the highs without the lows, what is wrong what type if things are you fighting with your brain over?

.... Why did you make my friend kill herself

I am sorry. I don't know what to say.